工作狂（2011）
Workaholics S07E10
Part 4
June 29, 2021, 9:09 a.m.
你这么做是要激怒我么
Did you do this to spite me?
我只是要自杀
I was just trying to kill myself, man.
所以是喽 公♥关♥手段啊
So then that's yes? Oh, it's a PR move.
啥 - 你是想压我的招牌吗
What? - You're trying to out-brand me?
是吗 你自己都没有什么招牌啊 Ders
Is that what... you don't even have a brand, Ders.
至少Blake有 不过他给剃光了
At least Blake had a brand til he shaved it off.
他甚至没有什么招牌 你知道吗
He doesn't even have a brand! You know what?
你是个好人 我打算在你婚礼上发言
You're a nice guy, and I plan on speaking at your wedding,
但是我们的合作到此为止 哥们
but we are done professionally, mate.
好了好了 这些班戈的人把我们都扭曲了
Okay, look, these Bango guys, they got us all twisted up,
但你 我们不用这么做 Adam
but you... we don't have to act like this, Adam.
我不用做的事多了去了 好吧
I don't have to do a lot of things, okay?
比如当你们的朋友 - 你说什么
Like be your guys's friend. - What?
另外一件我不用做的事
Another one of those things that I don't have to do
就是好好擦屁♥股♥ 因为现在有专人帮我擦
is wipe properly because I have a guy for that now.
可以说是非常奇怪了
That' strange. That's odd.
是的 他帮我擦屁♥股♥ Blake
Yes, he wipes my ass for me, Blake.
助理就是这么用的
It's part of having an assistant!
你喜欢就好 Adam 但是我也有粉丝
Good for you, Adam, but, you know, I have followers.
那边那个小孩 他为我自杀过
That kid right there, he tried to kill himself for me.
还真是酷啊 - 好吧 就这样
That's pretty cool. - All right, that's it.
就这样吧 你们俩 你觉得自己很酷啊
That's it. You guys... You think you're so cool.
你觉得自己很酷 因为你有范儿还有粉丝
You think you're so cool 'cause you got swag and followers.
哇 真棒 你知道我有什么吗
Wow, great. You know what I got?
啥也没有吧 - 你对空手道一无所知
Nothing, really? - You do not know karate.
我对空手道一无所知 - 你对空手道一无所知
I don't know karate. - You do not know karate.
我从来没说过我了解空手道
I never claimed to know karate ever.
嗯 我觉得你对空手道也一无所知啊
Yeah, I don't think you know karate.
我不是说我懂 我是说你不懂
I'm not saying I do. I'm saying you don't.
嘿 小伙子们 来尽情派对吧
Hey boys, come on, Let's party this puppy off.
假装也行 让我们赚钱吧
Or pretend. Let's make some cash.
你猜怎么着
You know what?
去你大爷的吧 - 对
Fuck this, right? - Yeah!
我不干了 我们后会有期
'Cause I'm done, so I will see you guys...
但是分道扬镳吧
but I don't wanna be you guys.
笑大声点 笑大声点
Laugh harder. Laugh harder.
那真是 - 噢
That was... - Oh!
经典语录
Catchphrase!
就这 我就不明白了
Yeah, this right here, I don't understand.
椅子上那个男的怎么就不是我呢
Why am I not the guy in the chair, right?
不 Adam 酒吧成人礼可不是这个玩法
Oh, no, Adam, that's not how a bar mitzvah works.
我以为我在这个叫"单车手套之热"的运动酒吧做DJ
I thought I was DJing at a sports bar called Bar Mitt Fuzz.
一只单车手套 里面打得火热
It's a bar mitt and there's fuzz in it.
单车手套之热 我的乖乖啊 - 别这么说
Bar Mitt Fuzz, baby doggy! - Don't do that.
可别在那乖乖了
Please, stop baby-dogging.
你放首别的歌♥能死吗
Would it kill you to play another song?
为什么 你不喜欢这首歌♥
Why, you don't like this one?
我觉得Asher Roth屌♥爆了
I think Asher Roth is tight butthole.
但也别连放12遍啊
But not 12 times in a row.
这首歌♥多屌♥爆啊
This song's very tight butthole.
你听得越多 它就越棒
The more you listen to it, the better it gets.
它会融进你的身体
It soaks in ya, right?
抱歉先生 让我跟他谈谈
Sorry, sir. Let me talk to him.
哦 你要和我谈谈 Goons 笑 笑大声点
Oh, you're gonna talk to me? Goons, laugh. Laugh harder.
停
Stop.
别笑得太用力
Don't laugh quite that hard.
哦天 你要和我谈谈呀
Oh, man, you're gonna talk to me?
Isaac 我才有资格谈话 Josh
Well, Isaac, I do the talking. Josh!
嘿 兄弟 我理解你想把自己包装成真男人
Hey, bud. I understand that you're branding yourself as a real man now.
但是你知道吗
Well, guess what, bud?
无论你怎么包装 不管你怎么努力
No matter how much you brand, no matter how much you work,
你的朋友们还是会在背后捅你刀子
your friends will backstab you.
在你背后用友谊之刀狠狠捅你
Stab you in the back. With a friendship knife!
因为他们嫉妒你的成功
Because they are jealous of your success.
他们还会背叛你 偷走你的特技
And they'll betray you and steal the stunt.
我为刚才的失态道歉
I'm sorry that I'm screaming.
Mayim Bialik的歌♥ 希望大家喜欢
Mayim Bialik, everyone. Enjoy.
呃 她是个演员 - 她演了<绽放>
Uh, that's an actress. - She played Blossom,
她还出演了<生活大爆♥炸♥>
and she was on "Big Bang Theory."
她是谢尔顿的女朋友 - 你知道吗
She's Sheldon's girlfriend. - You know what?
你是个好人 我挺喜欢你的
You're a good guy and I like you
我还计划帮你做抬棺人
and I still plan on being a pallbearer
在你妹妹的葬礼上 但是我们的合作到此为止了
at your sister's funeral, but we're done professionally.
合作到此为止 宝贝
Done professionally, my baby...
闭嘴吧 Goons 你被炒了
Stop it, Goons! You are fired.
你被炒了 - 等等 这是真的吗
And you are fired. - Wait, is this real?
然后你立刻被回聘了 Goons
And you are immediately rehired, Goons,
因为我需要人载我回家
because I need a ride home.
嘿 呃
Hey.. Ah.
屌♥爆啊 兄弟
Tight butthole, man?
屌♥爆之作
Tight butthole job.
我在想 你头上戴点东西
Hey, I was just wondering, maybe you'd be more comfortable
会不会更舒服一些
wearing something on your head?
你想让我把头遮住 为什么
Oh, you want me to cover my head? Why?
碍着你什么事儿了么
Something bothering you about it?
不是我 我挺喜欢的
Look. It's not me, okay? I love it.
你懂的 大家到这来
You know, it's just the people probably came here to,
就是为了欣赏你的头毛和汽车
you know, see the hair and the cars.
你把这个戴上吧
Here, why don't you put on this?
听着 Diaz
Look, Diaz,
你能离我远点吗
why don't you take a walk, all right,
趁我还没发脾气
before I lose my cool.
把帽子戴上 否则我他妈就不给你钱
Put on the hat. I'm not gonna fucking pay you.
好吧 我戴上
Yeah, okay, I'll wear that hat.
铁粉 - 绝对的 屌♥爆
Big fan. - Absolutely. Tight butthole.
放纵吧
Take it sleazy.
然后
And, uh...
屌♥爆啊
tight butthole.
呼 呼 哇 这么快啊 Corey
Hup! Hup! Whoa, way to finish, Corey.
游得漂亮
Nicely done.
天啊 回到池边的感觉太棒了
God, it feels good to be back on the deck,
远离那些扯淡玩意 那些小丑
away from all the BS... those clowns.
你好 - 你好
Hey. - Yeah?
很抱歉要扫你的兴了
Sorry to be such a loose butthole,
你能回到播音台吗
but can you get back to the announcer's booth?
下一组比赛马上就要开始了
The next heat is about to start.
哦 好的 抱歉
Right, yeah, sorry.
好样的 Corey
Good job, Corey.
好的 那么接下来
All right, and next,
就是我们的11到12岁男子组100米蝶泳比赛
we've got the boys, 11-12, 100 butterfly.
全国记录保持者是Chas Morton 还用说
National record held by the Chas Morton, of course.
八号♥泳道的选手是Pat Heffernan
In lane eight, Pat Heffernan.
八号♥泳道 哈哈
Lane eight. Ha-ha.
你们觉不觉得
You guys ever feel like
有时候自己就在人生的泳道里
sometimes you're in the lane eight of life?
大概我们都是吧
Probably we all do.
努力划水 努力让头浮出水面
Treading water, trying to keep your head above
但其实我们应该直接
when we should really probably just
沉到池底 张大嘴巴
sink to the bottom of the pool, open our mouths, and...
让这池水结束一切
let the water end it all.
没呢 好吧
Nope, okay.
第七泳道
In lane seven,
Brian Newman
Brian Newman.
看看这是谁啊
Look who it is!
人生输家小Blake又爬回电美了
Blakey the loser came crawling back to TAC.
你不也在这嘛 所以你也是"人生输家" 贱♥人♥
Well you're here, so "Loser" You too, bitch.
你可 哦 你知道吗
Well, you're... Oh, you know what?
你是贱♥人♥生的 对 我说的
You're a son of one. Yeah, that's right, I said it.
你个狗♥娘♥养♥的 你娘是狗娘
Son of a bitch, that means your mom is!
骂人别骂娘 - 没错 对 你娘
No, oh don't bring my mother... - Yeah, yeah, your mom!
工作狂（2011）
Workaholics
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