工作狂（2011）
Workaholics S07E04
Part 1
June 29, 2021, 9:08 a.m.
你明白的 我只是不那么
You know, I just wasn't, you know,
满意我最近的装扮
happy with my current look.
所以 我准备尝试些新花样 你觉得怎么样
So I'm--I'm trying something new, what do you think?
蒸汽朋克
Steampunk...
还是烟气朋克
or smoke-punk?
哥们儿 你就去水上乐园
Dude, just go "Waterworld,"
脱掉衣服就行
take those clothes off.
漂亮 - 我喜欢这主意
Yes! - I love that.
嘿 看看我 好吗
Hey, check me out, okay...
你真是个天才 - 我不帮你帮谁 哥们
You're a genius. - I'm here for you, man.
别玩儿了快看着我
Stop doing what you're doing and watch me.
好的 一个 两个
Okay, one, two--
还不错 - 几乎要创造纪录了
It's okay. - Almost got a record.
哦 我♥操♥ - 你在干嘛呢
Oh, shoot. - What are you doing?
那是我的钥匙吗 哥们 - 是的
Are those my keys, man? - They are.
我准备创造一个纪录了 看好
And I'm gonna get a record, watch.
我♥操♥ - 你会弄弯我的药店会员卡的
Shoot. - You're gonna bend my CVS card.
你为什么这么做
Ow, why are you doing that?
你不想让我享受会员折扣吗
Do you not want me to get discounts?
情有可原 - 你
It's understandable. - You ru--
哇 看看这是谁
Whoa, look who it is,
快♥感♥Bill
Bill the Thrill.
领带不错
Cool tie.
那是怎么回事
What's--what's up with that?
酷炫 对吧
Cool, right?
其实这是我妈的
It was actually my mom's.
看 这是只波利尼西亚绿海龟
See, it's a Polynesian green turtle,
主要分布于大溪地
found mainly in Tahiti.
哇 Bill 你居然在一本正经地解释
Wow, Bill, you're explaining it
就像我们感兴趣似的 但我们并不
like we care. And we don't!
我们不在乎 说实话
We don't, and honestly,
只有Blake才能穿这种傻♥逼♥玩意儿
only Blake gets to wear stupid stuff like that.
对 我是办公室时尚达人
Yeah, I am the office fashionista
况且 那不是条领带(平局)
and, uh, that is not a tie.
那是失败
It's a loss.
真有意思 你临时想到的吗
That was really funny. You just thought of that?
哦 等一下
Oh, wait a second.
说到时尚
Speaking of fashion,
Bill 你的裤子怎么回事
Bill, what's with your pants 'cause
看起来就像你勃起了
it looks like you're popping a boner!
哦 你 - 你真是勃地满满涨涨的
Oh, you - you're fully engorged!
对吧
Right?
这只是裤子的设计 兄弟们
Uh, that's just how the pants lay, guys.
不对 - 真的吗
Nope. - Uh, really?
对哈 你的裤子设计了
Yeah, your pants lay with
一个又大又硬的老二在里面
a gigantic hard dick inside of them?
不对 我不这么想
Uh, nah, I don't think so.
我认为你的小乌龟
I think your little turtle
正从它的壳里探出头呢
is poking its head out of its shell.
他们错了
They weren't wrong.
我开车过来的时候一直隔着衣服手♥淫♥
I'd been playing pocket pool on the ride over.
而且我很硬
And I was hard.
但是这些龟孙子不明白
But these dip- had no idea
我究竟能有多硬
how hard I could actually get.
真是一针见血
Guilty as charged.
你们真是太搞笑啦
You guys are hilarious.
谢谢你
Thank you.
谢谢 - 我们知道
Thank you. - We know.
对 - 完美吐槽
Yes. - Roasted.
哦 嘿 Bill 记好了
Oh, hey, Bill, um, remember,
我需要你去长滩TAC
I need you to head to TAC-Long Beach
归还那些热感狩猎视镜
and return those thermal hunting vision goggle things
我们借来做销♥售♥演示的 明白吗
we borrowed for the sales demo, kay?
当然 今天早上就能做完
Yeah, topped off the tank this morning.
好 棒极了 那快去吧
Well, great. Get going then.
因为你上次就晚了 然后我不得不和那边的Roger沟通
'Cause you were late last time, and I had to deal with Roger from TAC-LBC
听他指责我的松懈管理
saying how I run a loose ship.
这艘船可不松散
This ship isn't loose.
它全是窟窿眼而且很快就会沉没
It's full of holes and sinking fast.
我很乐意把你丢出船外
I'd like to toss you overboard
让你被鲨鱼撕咬得粉碎
and let the sharks rip you apart.
我很抱歉让你那么做了
I'm sorry you had to deal with that,
我认为你在管理时纪律严明 船长
I think you run one hell of a tight ship, Captain.
闭嘴 Bill 马屁精
Shut up, Bill. Kiss ass.
你想让我和他一起去吗
You want me to go with him?
确保他能准时
Make sure he's on time,
不会中途在哈利波特的主题公园里停下
doesn't stop off at The Wizarding World of Harry Potter,
喝杯黄油啤酒
get a butterbeer.
管好你自己吧 Tez
Stay in your lane, Tez.
现在还不是时候
This ain't the day.
恩 说得好
Mm, good point.
Bill Montez和你一起去
Bill, Montez is going with you.
棒 - 见鬼了
Yeah. - God freaking damn it.
好吧好吧 船长 没问题
Okey-dokey, Captain, not a problem.
事实上问题很大
But it is a problem
他不是计划的一部分
because he's not part of the plan.
必须严格按照计划完成这项使命
And this mission has to go exactly as planned.
不能有丝毫差错
There's no room for error.
永远都不能
There never is.
我在Yelp网上查了途径最好的Arby's快餐店
So I have Yelped the best Arby's on the way
因为他们隐藏菜单里有这个
because they got this off-menu sandwich
叫做"肉山"的三明治
called "The Meat Mountain."
Bill 你他♥娘♥的♥从哪儿得到这种酷毙了的公文箱
Bill, where the hell'd you get this super dope brief--
别碰那个
Don't touch that!
对不起我 我不是故意吼你的
Sorry, I--I don't mean to yell,
你把它放在后座就行 - 好吧
just put it in the backseat. - Okay.
你看啊
Look,
我很抱歉跟着你一起去
I'm sorry I'm tagging along,
但是我有些严重的婚姻问题
but I'm just having some serious marital problems
我需要 一些兄弟时光
and I need to, like, bro down.
好吧 你在想些什么 坐在我隔间办公的兄弟
Okay, what's on your mind, my cubicle brother?
我和Colleen 我们处境很不好
Me and Colleen, we in a bad place.
这辆蓝车已经尾随我一英里地了
This blue car's been behind me for the last mile.
你有点过于疑神疑鬼了 Bill
You're being paranoid, Bill.
没人知道你在今天送货
Nobody knows the drop-off is today.
她有这个让我戴绿帽的性幻想
She got this whole cuckolding fantasy
她和其他哥们做♥爱♥的时候让我看着
where she has sex with another dude while I watch,
但我们就是找不到适合给我戴绿帽的哥们
but we just can't find the right guy for the job.
于是她就觉得我不想这么做
And she think I don't want to do it,
她认为我在拖延时间 但我其实想这么做
think I'm stalling, but I want to do it.
你都不知道我有多变♥态♥ 我会戴捋毛子
You know how freaky I am. I'll get cuckolded.
这个词正确发音是"绿帽子"
It's pronounced "Cuckolding"
她想要成为性感人♥妻♥
but what she wants is to be hotwifed.
你认为你很怪异
You think you're so freaky,
但你只不过是个普通人
but you're as vanilla as they come.
拜托 我吃屎呢
Dude, I eat a [beep].
你们这些家伙真是疯狂
You guys have some crazy life.
希望你能找到隔壁老王
Hope you find the guy.
谢谢你 Bill
Thanks, Bill.
我是如此爱她
I just love her so much.
你究竟认为
And what exactly
你在做什么 蓝车
do you think you're doing, blue car?
你想吃午饭吗
You want to get some lunch?
哦 我们去吃肉山三明治吧
Oh! Let's get that Meat Mountain.
Arby's我们来啦
Arby's here we come
其实我更想吃
Actually I was thinking more like...
中国菜 - 嗯
Chinese. - Mm.
我们应该问问他们有没有隐藏菜单
You know we should ask if they have any off-menu items.
你好
Hello?
Bill 太没礼貌了
Bill, that's rude.
工作狂（2011）
Workaholics
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