朝上

其实还挺好笑的 因为 你看
It's a good gag actually, cos, look.
这是约翰·莫森
That's John Motson.
这是他穿着羊皮外套
This is him with the sheepskin.
妈的
Oh, shit.
我们应该敷那种挂耳式的面膜
We should have got the ones with the ear hooks.
现在能揭下来了吗 我脖子要疼死了
Can we not take them off now, my cacking neck is killing me?
不能 你要敷满20分钟
No, you've got to leave it on for 20 minutes.
那是最关键的一步
That's the point.
-脖子疼是因为肌肉紧张 -什么
- And that's tension, by the way. - What?!
你的悲伤情绪都积压在这
It's where you hold your sadness.
总比积压在屁♥股♥里要好
Better than my arse, I suppose.
不是因为这个 是因为我昨晚又没睡着
And it's not. It's just cos I didn't sleep again last night.
-你应该跟你的治疗师谈谈... -让我说完
- Well, you should talk to your therapist... - Let me finish.
因为布莱德利和艾玛做♥爱♥声音太大
Because Bradley and Emma were having sex so loudly.
说实话 就像两只野猫互殴对方的脸一样
Honestly, like two alley cats punching each other in the face.
你为什么还在看治疗师
Why are you still seeing your therapist, though?
-说真的 -太爽了
- Seriously... - Yes.
话说 跟我说说你那个夏洛特吧
Hey, tell me about your one Charlotte.
她怎么了
What about her?
就是 她长什么样
Just, what does she look like?
她长什么样
What does she look like?
-给我画张画看下 -我直接给你看照片
- Paint me a picture. - I'll show you a picture.
-太好了 -她的脖子超级长
- Oh, do, yeah. - She's got this mad long neck...
就跟长颈鹿一样
Looks like a giraffe.
-天呐 -不过 是美的那种
- Oh, my God! - But, like, in a good way!
-美丽的长颈鹿 -她的皮肤超级完美
- A pretty giraffe! - And it's like her skin is nuts.
从这张照片上看不出来 简直...
You can't even tell from that photo, it's just...
-她化了妆吗 -没有 她不化妆
- Is she wearing make up? - No! She doesn't wear make up.
-天呐 -愚蠢的母牛
- Oh, my God. - Stupid cow.
自然美 真是个贱♥人♥
Natural beauty, what a bitch.
不过她是个很好的人
She's great, though.
她目前对于工作的看法跟我一样
She feels the same way as me about work at the moment,
说工作毁了她的灵魂
just that it's destroying her soul.
你的工作明明很棒啊
You have a brilliant job!
-是吗 -是啊
- Really? - Yeah.
我的工作是什么
What is my job?
我是做什么的 我的工作是什么
What do I do? What's my job?
-我是做什么的 我的工作是什么 -你...
- What do I do? What's my job? - You...
你的工作跟钱有关 我不知道
You do money! I don't know!
股票 股份 纳斯达克
Stocks! Shares! Nasdaq.
计算器 我也说不清 没人真正懂经济
Calculators. I don't know, nobody understands the economy,
所以大家才把错误都推到移♥民♥身上 那要容易得多
that's why people blame everything on immigrants. It's easier.
天呐 她的网站竟然还配了音乐
Oh my God, her website has music.
我知道 那很棒 不是吗
I know, it's great, isn't it?
我明天跟她见面 有个想法要向她推介一下
Gonna meet her tomorrow. Got an idea I'm gonna pitch to her.
好吧
Ok!
-股票 -财富
- Stocks! - Wealth!
-股份 -金钱
- Shares! - Money!
银行业
Banking!
-计算器 -基金
- Calculators! - Funds!
我要把你吃掉 就像吃一片...
I'm going to eat you like a little piece of...
-我不记得了 -你这模仿真是惟妙惟肖
- I can't remember... - What an amazing impression!
是汉尼拔·莱克特
It's Hannibal Lecter!
我要把你吃掉 就像吃鸡肉一样
I'm going to eat you like a little chicken, boy.
大家好
Hello, everybody.
早上好 我很抱歉我迟到了
Good morning, I am so sorry I am late, everybody.
并且 我没吃早餐
And also, I haven't had breakfast,
所以如果我的肚子咕咕叫 我...
so if my tummy grumbles, I...
麻烦你们礼貌点 假装没听到
And please, just be polite and pretend you don't hear.
我会慢慢衰弱枯萎 就像秋末的叶子
I'm going to waste away, like a leaf at the end of autumn.
你说什么 威尔
What's that, Will?
天呐
Oh, my God!
天呐 维克多
Jesus! Victor...
你这是怎么了
What happened to you?
他不肯跟我们说
He won't speak to us.
我们觉得是种族歧视者的袭击
We think racist attack.
天呐 维克多 让我看看你的眼睛 天呐
Oh my God, Victor, let me see your eye, lovey. Jesus.
天呐 有人因为你是保加利亚人就打你了吗
God, did somebody attack you cos you're Bulgarian?
没错 我是保加利亚人
Yes, I'm Bulgarian.
砖头砸的
Brick hit me.
一定要去医院看看才行
We're going to have to get that seen to.
詹姆斯 拜托
James, come on!
某个种族歧视者殴打了这个可怜的人
Some racist clocked the poor guy.
我也是外国人 所以打他相当于打我
And I'm foreign, so an attack on him is an attack on me.
-好吧 艾琳·布拉科维奇 -你这么说可不公平
- All right, Erin Brockovich. - That's not fair.
该死的种族歧视
Fucking racism.
很不爽吧
Bad, is it?
好吧 我意识到我有点混♥蛋♥
Yes, I do realise I'm a bit of a dickhead,
但是 詹姆斯 他现在很脆弱
but James, he's very vulnerable.
并且他几乎说不出英语
And he barely has a word of English.
所以如果你能带他去医院 我会感激不尽
So I would really appreciate you just taking him to the hospital.
他们又不是孩子 艾妮
These aren't kids, Aine.
如果你的情绪这么强烈 那你带他去吧
And if you feel so strongly, you can take him.
我去不了 我5点要教那个法国小孩
No, I can't, cos I have to tutor that French kid at five.
-是的 没错 -是的 没错 为你做事
- Yes, you do. - Yes, I do. For you!
-不 我付了你工资的 -有道理
- No, you're being paid. - Fair point.
-你确定你不能带他去吗 -不能
- You defo can't take him? - No!
非常感谢你陪我一起去 珍
Thanks so much for coming with me, by the way, Jen.
天呐 我今天有好多事要忙
God, I've got so much on today.
当然了 我们是一家人嘛
Of course. We are family.
真的太贴心了
That's so sweet.
我好讨厌男人都不喜欢谈论他们的感受或痛苦
I hate the way men don't talk about their feelings, or pain.
维克多是个大男人
Victor... He's a big man.
他不会跟种族歧视者对抗
He don't fight racists.
所以现在他觉得很羞耻
So now he ashamed.
男人的人生可能也会很艰难
Life can be hard for men, too.
但我觉得那种脆弱被视作是一种软弱
But I think that vulnerability is seen as a weakness.
你知道脆弱...
Do you know what vulnerab...
脆弱就像是...
Vulnerability is like...
男人的人生太艰难了 现在什么都不能做
Life is hard for men. Can't do anything now.
在酒吧抱一下女人 突然间就成强♥奸♥犯了
Give a woman a hug in a bar, suddenly you're a rapist.
如果不认识她 最好还是别抱了
Well, maybe if you don't know her, don't hug her.
整个社会运动 搞得太过火了
Gone too far, the whole thing.
是啊 整个社会运动
Yeah, the whole thing, yeah.
整个社会运动
Whole thing.
急诊室
不 不
No, no.
不要报♥警♥
No police.
好吧 维克多
Fine, fine, Victor.
但是 自从脱欧公♥投♥以来 发生了太多
But, you know, it's awful how many racist attacks
种族歧视的袭击 真的太可怕了
have been happening since Brexit.
像我们这样的移♥民♥
Immigrants, just like us.
因为太害怕而不敢报♥警♥
Too scared to call the police.
我们只是想过上更好的生活
We're all just trying to better our lives, you know?
让孩子有口饭吃
Feed our children.
你有孩子吗 艾妮
You have children, Aine?
据我所知没有
Not that I know of, no.
火车上有几个女孩 对我大喊
You know these girls from train? Shout at me.
"滚蛋 脱欧"
"Fuck off, Brexit".
他们是印度人 印度人就喜欢歧视别人
They Indian. Indian people, very racist.
珍 你这句话本身就...
Well, I mean, Jen, that in itself is...
算是...种族歧视了
I mean, that's... racist,
因为我姐姐的男友就是印度人 所以...
because my sister's boyfriend is Indian, so...
我笑了 我对他们说 "你们这些傻♥逼♥蠢婊♥子♥"
I laugh. I say to them, "You stupid bitches."
我是中国人 尽管脱欧吧 我还会待在这里
I Chinese. So Brexit, I stay here.
我就跟你说实话吧 珍
I mean... I'll be honest with you, Jen.
尽管你对印度人的看法 怎么着也算有问题了
While your views on Indian people are at best, er, problematic,
但你这回应真的很精彩
that's a really good comeback.
你在这里陪着他吧 我得走了
Right, you can stay here with him, because I have to go, so...
-不 我得走了 -什么
- No, I have to go. - What?
避开交通高峰