朝上

Well, I just thought you might be French.
不 不是的
No. No.
不 我不是法国人
No, I'm not French.
你要是改变主意了 跟我说一声哦
Well, let me know if you change your mind!
其实是我的...
It's actually my...
我的...
my...
儿子 大概可以这么说吧
well, son, I suppose, yeah.
没错 我儿子 需要辅♥导♥
Yeah, son, that... who needs tutoring.
这样啊 所以你不需要英语辅♥导♥吗
Oh, right, so you don't need help with your English, then?
在我们辅♥导♥行业这被称为...笑话
That is what we call in the tutoring business...A joke.
好吧
Right.
他今年12岁 刚从法国搬来
He's 12. He's just moved here from France.
我觉得他的英语...
I think his English is...
应该比他表现出来的要好
is probably better than he lets on.
天呐 他听起来是个小滑头
God, he sounds shifty.
没错 他是这样的 差不多
Yeah, that's about it, really.
他的头发是棕色的
Uh, he has brown hair.
那我可得走了
Then I am outta here!
-这也是在开玩笑吧 -没错 是的
- Another one of your jokes? - It was, yeah.
还有 他妈妈最近去世了
Oh, and, er, his mother died recently.
我的天呐 我很遗憾
Oh, my God. I'm so sorry.
没事
Oh, it's OK.
-我跟她其实也没那么熟 -好吧 但...
- I actually didn't know her that well. - Yeah, but, like...
对艾蒂安就不一样了
for Etienne.
-是啊 -天呐
- Yeah. - Wow. God.
那...
That's...
所以你跟她完全不熟吗
And so you didn't know her?
是的 不怎么了解...
No, not really, uh...
不算 我们以前每年见一次
No, we used to see each other once a year.
那他现在跟你一起生活吗
And now he lives with you?
我是他的法定监护人
I'm, I'm his legal guardian.
他的父亲吗
His father?
对 对
Yup, yup.
也是他的父亲
That too.
天呐 男人和女人在做♥爱♥这事上
God, there's such different consequences having sex
要承担的后果完全不一样
when you've got a penis compared to a vagina, aren't there?
其实我应该把这句话咽进去
I could have kept that one in my mouth, actually.
而不是说出来
Instead of letting it come out.
他就在楼上等着呢
Uh, he's, uh, waiting upstairs.
如果你...
If you, uh...
如果你想上去的话
If you want to go up.
-也许可以 现在上课 -好的
- Maybe...now? - Oh, yeah.
你好 艾蒂安
Hello, Etienne!
我是艾妮 你的英语老师
I'm Aine, the English tutor.
你好
Bonjour.
不 我们现在开始上课吧
No. Nous allons commencer maintenant.
那就 开始吧
Let's, er, let's start now.
你好
Hello.
-你好 -你已经是个天才了
- Hello. - You're a genius already!
我简直不敢相信
I can't believe it!
你在玩什么
What are you, what are you playing?
马里奥派对
Mario Party.
那是我最爱的派对
My favourite kind of party.
以前我和那群人都认识
I used to know those guys back in the day.
在他们出名之前
Before they got famous.
你在这里住多久了
How long have you lived here for?
-一个月 -用英语怎么说
- Un mois. - English?
-月 -一个月 很好
- Months. - Ah, one month, yeah.
你♥爸♥爸...
Did your dad, eh...
不好意思 你用英语还是法语称呼"爸爸"
Sorry, do you say "Dad", or do you say, "Papa"?
-他是做什么的 -他是卖♥♥书的
- What does he do? - He's selling books.
他给了我这个
And he gives me this.
《刽子手的欢乐场》
《21世纪马♥克♥思♥主义的当代研究》
天呐
God.
他有点 他是那种...
He's a bit, eh, he's a little bit like...
打招呼很奇怪的人 对吧
"Hullo, hullo", isn't he?
没错 他确实是这样的
Yeah, he's quite.
是啊
Yeah.
-你在这边有朋友吗 朋友 -没有
- Do you have friends here? Les amis? - Non.
那你现在有一个了
Well, you have one now.
我 就是我 没错
Me. I mean me, yeah.
我的意思是 如果你想跟我做朋友的话
I mean, if you want to be my friend, that is.
-不要 -你不要吗
- Non. - No, you don't?
我的天呐 那也...
Oh, my God! That's...
那也太坏了
I mean... That's awful!
开玩笑的
Joking!
你在开玩笑 你真的骗到我了
You were joking? Well, you absolutely had me.
你个爱开玩笑的小鬼
You big old joker.
所以我们能正式成为朋友吗
So can we officially be friends, please?
-好的 -是吗
- OK. - Yeah?
太好了
Amazing.
你想跟我一起玩吗
Vous aimez jouer avec moi?
我脑子里一点法语都不剩了 艾蒂安
All the French has completely gone out of my head, Etienne.
你想跟我一起玩吗
You want to play with me?
我还有一个...
I has another...
现在不行
Oh, well, not now.
但是 如果你♥爸♥爸不讨厌我
But, if your dad doesn't hate me,
他大概率也不会讨厌我
and there's a strong chance that he might,
我会再过来的
I'll come back again,
可能明天就来
probably tomorrow, maybe?
你不会回来的
You won't come back.
好了 艾蒂安 不好意思
Now. Etienne, excusez-moi.
我会回来的 我来告诉你原因
I will come back and I will tell you why.
其实我是小小意大利水暖工派对玩家中的冠军
I am actually a champion... tiny Italian plumber's party...player.
我跟你赌5...
And I bet you five...
5...英镑...
cinq...pounds...
我保证我明天会回来
And I promise you that I'm going to come back tomorrow
然后在游戏中打败你
and beat you at the game.
什么 没错
What?! Yes.
-好 -好吗
- OK. - Yeah?
-5英镑 -5英镑
- Five pounds. - Five pounds.
我保证
It's a promise.
-好了 -你说
- Right. - Yes.
那... 明天5点见
So...er, tomorrow at five?
好 好 明天会有更多好玩机智的玩笑
Yes, yes, for more of our hilarious, quick-witted banter.
你们在一起的时候...
So, when you guys are hanging out...
在一起
Hanging out?
没错 就是一起相处的时候
Yes. Like, hanging out.
如果你能读点东西给他听 那就最好了
it's really good if you can read to him.
-这个方法很有效 -好
- That sort of stuff really helps. - Right, er...
这种事 是不是你也可以跟他做
Is that something that, er, maybe you could do with him?
是的
Yeah.
吧 我得走了
OK, well, I have to go,
因为我们约好今晚在家待着 所以...
cos we're having a night in, so...
你和你丈夫吗
You and your husband?
丈夫 这玩笑开得好 不是...
Husband! Very good. No, um...
和我姐姐
My sister.
-好吧 -她有点像我老公 但是...
- Right. - I mean, she's a bit like my husband, but...
你有妻子吗
Do you have a wife?
没有
No.
我只有...
I'm just...
一个突然出现的儿子 所以...
Just a son suddenly, so...
那好吧
Right, well.
你的外套非常...
Your jacket's very, er...
有约翰·莫森的风格
um, John Motson.
英国足球解说员
我不知道那是谁... 这是在夸我吗
I don't know who...that... Is that a compliment?
是个足球梗
Er, football reference.
好吧
Ok.
是那个...
Oh, is that...
我的天呐
Christ on a bike.