英村脑残故事（2017）

No. You don't remember that?
不记得 你不记得了吗
No. Nothing?
不记得 一点儿也不吗
Nothing.
完全不记得
Fuck.
操
Right, I'm going to get Slugs over,
好吧 我去叫Slugs过来
he was in our class, he'll remember.
他当时也在我们班 他会记得的
Please don't get Slugs over. Yes, I am!
求你别把Slugs弄过来 不 我要
He'll never leave.
他一来就不会走了
Me and Kurtan have known Slugs since school
我和Kurtan从上学时就认识了Slugs
and I've never met anyone who outstays their welcome more than him.
我从来没遇到比他更不识好歹的人 总是久留到令人生厌
Like, you'll say, "Sorry, Slugs,
就好像 你会说 "抱歉 Slugs"
"I can't stop and chat I've got to go and have my dinner."
"我不能逗留聊天 我得去吃晚饭"
And he'll go, "What we having?"
而他会说 "那我们吃什么呢"
Robert Robinson, yeah?
Robert Robinson 知道吗
He had a fat woman's ass
他有一个 肥胖的女人似的屁♥股♥
and tiny,short little legs like a troll.
以及一双侏儒一样的小短腿
Yeah, you sure you're not talking about Slugs?
好吧 你确定你说的不是Slugs吗
Positive. He genuinely looked like a Moomin.
确定 他真的看上去像姆明一样
Yeah, so does Slugs.
是啊 Slugs也是这样
I know, but it ain't Slugs.
我知道 但我说的不是Slugs
His school jumper, yeah,
他的校服了 没错
was the most faded out of everyone's.
是所有人的校服里里褪色最厉害的
He used to chew his sleeves into threads.
他以前把袖子都咬散线了
No.
不记得
He brought in a bit of meteorite once, yeah, for show and tell,
曾经有一次他为了课堂展示还带了一小块陨石来
and Darren Lacy called him Apollo 13.
Darren Lacy还称他是阿波罗13号♥
No. Oh, my God.
不记得 哦 我的天啊
He was obsessed with salamanders, yeah?
他当时痴迷于火蜥蜴 没错
And we saw him at the school fete
我们曾经在学校募捐会上看到他
and he was carrying around a little bank bag full of coppers
他当时带着一个装满了便士的财务袋
and his face was painted like a salamander
他的脸画的就像火蜥蜴一样
and he was hissing at dogs.
然后他对着狗嘶嘶地叫
How do you not remember Robert fucking Robinson?
你们怎么会不记得他妈的Robert Robinson
Oh, my God, there's this website
哦 我的天 这个有个网站
that allows you to watch a loaf of bread slowly going stale.
你可以看着一条面包逐渐走向变质的过程
Fucking hell, man!
我♥操♥ 朋友
Stop it.
别再这样了
What's it called? Loaf of bread cam.
那个网站叫什么 一条面包网
Seriously?
你认真的吗
He's not on Facebook.
脸书上找不到他
How can he not be on Facebook?
怎么会在脸书上找不到他
Everyone's on Facebook.
每个人都玩脸书
That doesn't make any sense.
这说不通
Maybe he changed his name cos he got married.
有可能他因为结婚改了名字
What? Maybe he's not on Facebook because he doesn't exist.
什么 可能他没有玩脸书是因为他根本就不存在
What about that tea towel?
那条茶巾呢
Where is it?
在哪儿
This is it. Got it.
在这 我找到了
I've got it. This is it.
我找到了 就是这个
There.
你们看
That's him, He's here. Let me see.
这就是他 他就在这 让我看看
Rob Robinson. I got it.
Rob Robinson 我找到了
You see? Right there.
你看到了吗 就在这里
Rob Robinson.
Rob Robinson
And that was him. And I was...
那就是他 我当时
I knew it, didn't I?
我就知道 不是吗
And that looks like him, as well.
那看起来就像他一样
That looks exactly like him.
看起来和他完全一样
There's a massive pond in the back of there
那边背面有一个很大的池塘
and two summers ago, it got really bad algae.
两年前的夏天那里的水藻问题很严重
32 grand's worth of Koi carp just dead in a day.
价值三万两千英镑的锦鲤一天之内死了个干净
And the algae was thick, like a pint of cheese.
水藻非常厚 就像一品脱奶酪一样
And down there is karate club.
那边是一个空手道俱乐部
On my first day of karate club,
我第一天去空手道俱乐部的时候
karate master goes to me, "Kerry, I don't know why you're here
教练过来跟我说 "Kerry 我不知道你来这干嘛"
because I can't teach you anything."
"因为我教不了你任何东西"
"If anything, you should be teaching me."
"如果有什么 也是你应该教教我"
And just gave me his black belt.
然后就把他的黑带给了我
All right, Mand?
还好吗 Mand
No, I'm not all right. You know that little old blind man?
不 我不好 你知道那个小个子的老瞎子吧
Yeah. Yeah, when I was punching him in his face,
是的 是的 当我打他脸的时候
the lens from his glasses broke and cut my knuckle.
他的眼镜镜片碎了 然后划伤了我的指关节
Oh, right.
哦 好的吧
Do you want a tattoo, by the way?
顺便问一句 你想有个纹身吗
Why's that? Oh, I'm a qualified tattoo artist now,
为什么这么问 哦 我现在是个受认证的纹身艺术家了
I've got my certificate this morning.
我今早拿到了我的证书
Nice one.
你真棒
Do you want one, then? Well, yeah, I've always wanted one
那你想来一个吗 这样啊 好吧 我一直想要一个
but I've just got no money.
但我一直没钱
I've been saving up. No, no, I'd do it for free.
我还一直在存钱 不 不需要 我免费做这个
Are you serious?
你是认真的吗
Yeah, helps me build up my portfolio and that. Oh!
是啊 帮我添点经验整点名气 哦
Why don't you come round tomorrow afternoon, then?
那你明天下午过来怎么样
That'd be amazing.
那可真是太棒了
All right. Aw, nice one, Mand, cheers.
没错 呃 你真棒 Mand 加油
I'll see you later.
待会儿见
Tyson, fuck off!
Tyson 滚开
So, there's a house over there
那儿有一座房♥子
that we used to cherry knock at all the time.
我们以前常常去那玩敲了门就跑的恶作剧
But since Graham's wife died, we don't do it any more
不过自从Graham的妻子过世后 我们就没再做过了
cos we don't take the piss.
因为我们才不想上门讨骂
I'm going to do whatever it takes to find out
我将会尽我一切努力来找出
what happened to Robert Robinson.
Robert Robinson身上到底发生了什么事
My theory is...is that he died
我的猜想是 他其实已经死了
but they just kept it from us
不过大人们我们隐瞒了这个消息
cos we was just little, innocent children.
因为我们当时只是年幼单纯的小孩子
This is where Robert Robinson lived.
这里就是Robert Robinson住过的地方
I can see him, I can just see him now,
我感觉我可以看见他 我现在就能看见他
just playing in the garden.
在院子里玩耍
Summer evening, having so much fun and laughter.
在夏天的夜晚里 充满欢声笑语
Cos he loved life.
因为他曾经那么热爱生活
And then his mum comes out, "Robert, dinner's ready."
然后他的妈妈出现了 说"Robert,该吃晚饭了"
And he's like, "Mum, I don't want to eat,
然后他就说"妈妈 我不想吃饭"
"I'm having too much fun playing."
"我正玩得很开心呢"
She goes, "You have to eat something, Robert."
她就说 "你必须要吃点东西 Robert"
And he goes, "No, seriously, I'm fine."
然后他说 "不用 真的 我很好"
She goes, "Right, that's it."
她说"好吧 我受够了"
So she grabs him by the neck, like this,
然后她就揪住他的脖子 就这样
pulls him in, and he's crying,
把他拖出来 然后他哭着
and he's putting his heels in but she's kicking him.
他奋力反抗 但是他妈妈踢了他一脚
Thumping him on the back.
在他背上捶了一拳
And so he gets sent up to his bedroom without any tea.
然后他都不准喝茶就被送回自己房♥间里
Kurtan? Cos he did have abusive parents.
Kurtan 因为他的父母有虐待倾向
What? There's a pair of old SpiderMan pants here
怎么 这里有一条印了蜘蛛侠的旧内♥裤♥
with some skidders in them.
上面还粘了点屎印子
Yeah. Those will be his.
没错 那应该就是他的
It's just like one day he was here,
感觉就像有一天他还在这里
and then the next, he was gone.
然后接着 他就消失了
I can see... I can feel,
我可以看 我可以感觉到
I can feel, Kerr, I can feel him here.
我可以感觉到 Kerr 我可以感觉到他在这里
I'm getting this weird feeling, I swear to God.
我有这种奇怪的感应 我对天发誓
You all right, Kurts?
你还好吗 Kurts
Can you just give me a minute?
你能给我点时间吗
He's loving this.
他最喜欢干这种事
He gets very much too obsessive with things
他总是会对一些事情过分着迷
like, last week he was obsessed with
比如说 上周他就迷上了
finding out what happened to the cast of The Queen's Nose.
要弄清楚<女王的鼻子>的演员们现在怎么样了
It's, like, an old kids' programme that was on TV.
那是一档 很老的儿童电视节目
And a lot of them are still acting, actually.
事实上 他们大多数人还在演戏
And then he got obsessed with the...the Fuse bar.
之后他又迷上了 芙斯巧克力棒