职介破事儿（2013）

So, what's that about? Yes, well...
这是为什么呢? 没错 因为...
Natalie's focused on her career at the moment.
Natalie现在想全力以赴忙事业
Oh, sweetheart, don't let this place stop you finding a fella.
亲爱的 千万别因为在这儿工作就不去找另一半儿
You're far too lovely to keep all to yourself.
你这么可爱 没人欣赏太可惜了
Ah... Yeah, I would.
哦... 是啊 我能欣赏哦
Thanks. There's plenty of time for romance later.
多谢 你侬我侬的事待会儿再说
You want to be regional manager by the time you're 30, don't you Natalie?
你想在30岁之前成为区域经理不是吗 Natalie?
Can't I have a boyfriend and be regional manager? No, you can't.
男友和区域经理不能兼得吗? 不能
Well, what if she meets the right person now?
要是她现在遇到了真命天子呢?
She may only get one chance to find true happiness.
可能她只有一次机会遇到真爱
OK, let's move on. This isn't Dawson's Creek.
好了 我们继续吧 这可不是《恋爱时代》
That's what today's about, Trish, my lovely darling.
这才是今天的主题 Trish 亲爱的
You can't let work take over your life. Yeah.
别让工作成为生活的全部 没错
And you can't let life ruin your career.
但也不能让生活毁了事业
I'm single, I'm successful and I am very happy.
我是单身 我很成功也很快乐
Right? I am happy.
不是吗? 我很开心
Are we happy? I'm happy.
我们开心吗? 我很开心
So, let's hail yourselves a relaxi-taxi, it's massage time.
接下来 我们进入'放松的士'环节 按♥摩♥时间到啦
Is that good?
这样可以吗?
Am I doing it right? Yeah, it feels nice.
我做得对吗? 嗯 很舒服
Bit harder maybe.
可以再用点力
Harder. OK.
用力 好的
Shall I go faster?
要快点吗?
Karl, if you could stop manhandling Natalie for a moment,
Karl 你能不能稍等一下
I'd like a word with her.
我要跟Natalie说句话
Oh! Are my eyes deceiving me?
哦! 我没看错吧?
It looks like a beautiful woman has been left without a partner.
好像有个漂亮姑娘落单了呢
Get your fat fingers off me, or I will damage you.
把你的肥手拿开 小心我揍你
Ho ho ho ho! Oh, you do make me laugh, Angie.
呵呵呵呵! 你把我逗笑了呢 Angie
Come on.
好了
Ah, that is really relaxing.
啊 太舒服了
It's like your fingers are melting into my back.
感觉你的手指跟我的背融为一体了
Relax, just go with it mate.
放松 好好享受 伙计
Seriously, it's like warm custard is being poured all over my body.
说真的 感觉就像暖暖的蛋奶羹被注入全身
I love coming up on Ketamine.
我喜欢克他命的感觉
Yeah! Yeah.
耶! 耶
Sorry, what what did you say?
抱歉 你刚才说什么?
Ketamine? Yeah, in the drink.
克他命? 是啊 在饮料里
Oh, did you think it was pills? No.
你不会以为是摇♥头♥丸♥吧? 不
I thought it was vodka. Ha ha! You are proper funny man.
我以为是伏特加 哈哈! 你真是太逗了
You have done K before, haven't you? No, I haven't. Call me oldfashioned,
你以前磕过药吧? 没有 我是有点保守
but I don't usually have horse tranquiliser for breakfast.
但我不习惯早饭就嗑药
Ahh, you had me going then!
啊 这下你破例了!
Oh, bad jokes.
一点都不好笑
Oh...
哦...
Ohh!
哦!
Fuck!
靠!
There's no way of saying this,
我说这个没有恶意
but I think Karl finds you sexually attractive.
不过我觉得Karl被你吸引住了
Trish! So obviously you need to be separated.
Trish! 所以要把你们分开
Separated? We're not naughty children. What about the rule?
分开? 我们又不是小孩子 那规矩呢?
Dating a colleague is a disaster waiting to happen.
跟同事约会就是颗定时炸♥弹♥
I'm only thinking of you. Are you?
我是为你好 是吗?
Trish?
Trish?
Oh, Natalie, sweetheart, can we have a talk about your future?
Natalie 亲爱的 有时间聊聊你的未来发展吗?
Can we go in here?
我们进来说吧?
Yep.
好的
What's this about?
聊什么呢?
Is everything all right, my beautiful darling?
你还好吗 我亲爱的美少女?
Stop me if I'm out of line,
要是觉得我唐突就直说
but I sensed tension between you and Trish.
我感觉到了你和Trish之间的火♥药♥味儿
Oh. Is it that noticeable? Talk to me, Natalie.
这么明显吗? 跟我说说 Natalie
Tell me your troubles.
说说你的烦恼
We know Trish is occasionally impossible to work with.
我们都知道Trish有时候是不太好相处
No, it's not that, it's just she's got this rule
不是因为那个 是因为她那条
about not dating your work colleagues,
不能和同事约会的规定
and I think I've sort of fallen for one of mine.
我觉得自己喜欢上了一个同事
Is it George?
是George吗?
The fraud officer with the beard you could hang onto for dear life.
那个留着胡子的反诈骗警♥察♥ 你可以拼命揪他的胡子
No. It's Karl. The sort of funny-looking, clean-shaven one.
不是 是Karl 看着很有趣 不留胡子的那个
Oh, I see. Then, why don't you come and work for me, my lovely?
我知道了 你为什么不到我这儿来工作呢 亲爱的?
I'm rarely there, what with my health problems.
我不经常在 因为身体不允许
If it's not my feet, it's my migraines. And...
不是脚痛就是头痛 而且...
I'm going through the change.
我正为这些变化痛不欲生
So some days I'm just too emotional to come in.
所以我太情绪化的时候就不能去上班
I cry at tampon adverts.
卫生棉条的广♥告♥都能把我看哭
What do you think?
你觉得怎么样?
Would I still be deputy manager at Kingstanding?
我去金斯坦丁还是做副经理吗?
And acting manager when I was away. I don't care who you have sex with.
我不在的时候就是代管经理 我不在乎你跟谁上♥床♥
Brilliant! I'll have sex with everyone!
太棒了! 我要把所有人都睡一遍
Ew, Natalie.
呕 Natalie
Can I think about it? We should probably get back.
我能考虑一下吗? 我们得回去了
Oh, Trish has left her keys.
Trish忘拿钥匙了
Oh, no, no, no!
不不不!
Don't be locked.
别锁门
Oh, Trish.
哦Trish
Oh, God. OK.
天哪 好吧
It's all right, Trish, keep calm.
没事的 Trish 保持冷静
Well, no, I didn't mean to take it.
不 我不是故意喝的
It was in a drink. No, I'm not at a rave.
是在饮料里 不 我没在胡言乱语
I'm at a health and wellbeing training event.
我在上健康和幸福培训课
Yes, I can see the irony.
我知道你在讽刺我
Oh. Oh.
噢 噢
Wh-Wh-What's going to happen? I'm starting to feel floppy.
会发生什 什么? 我觉得整个人软绵绵的
Karl looks up.
Karl 向上看
Hello, Natalie. Hi.
你好 Natalie 嗨
Have you seen Trish anywhere? We're going to start back. Trish?
你看见Trish了吗? 我们要开始了 Trish?
No, I have not seen Trish, not at all... Natalie.
没看见她 别客气 Natalie
All right.
好吧
Goodbye, Natalie.
再见 Natalie
Does it have to be today?
一定要今天吗?
Please don't call me names.
不要叫我的名字
Some men find that word offensive.
有些人觉得那样很无礼
Someone's keen. Sometimes, Paul...
有人按捺不住了哦 有时候 Paul...
life would be easier if I just went and lived alone in the woods.
我自己一个人住在森林里日子还好过些
Where would you sleep? I'd fashion a bivouac out of leaves and moss.
你睡哪儿? 我可以用叶子和苔藓来搭露营
You've never even been camping. What's brought this on?
你一定没野营过 这是怎么了?
Tanya's booked me in for a sperm test. She thinks I'm firing blanks.
Tanya帮我预定了精♥子♥测试 她觉得我在射空炮
I see. I went for a test before, but I couldn't do it.
明白了 我之前就去过 但是我做不来
Too much pressure at the clinic.
在诊所压力太大
I don't perform well under stress.
一有压力我就不行了
They gave me this to fill.
他们让我装满它
I don't think you have to fill it, mate. You're not a whale.
我觉得你没必要装满 伙计 你又不是鲸
If I go home without a sample,
要是我不拿着样本回去
Tanya will make sure I have nothing to do a sample with.
Tanya就更加肯定我拿不出样本了
Why don't you take yourself to the disabled toilet for five minutes?
你干嘛不去残疾人厕所待5分钟?
It's perfect for some private gentleman time.
那里是用手解决的最佳场所
And they've got a mirror.
里面还有镜子呢
I am off my chops.
我真该剁手
I feel sort of terrified.
我有点儿怕
My... My leg's gone wobbly.
我...我的腿在颤
I think your phone's ringing.
我觉得是你的手♥机♥响了
Oh!
喔!
Trish is phoning me.
Trish打给我的
Yeah. You gonna answer it?
是啊 你接吗?
No.
不接
Oh, my phone feels like a sponge.
我的手♥机♥拿上去像块海绵
Squashy. Like a boob. Yes.
要那种跟胸一样软软的 没错
A boob.
胸
I like boobs.
我喜欢胸