职介破事儿（2013）

I'm on my way home now.
我在回去的路上了
Darling, I'm not a machine.
亲爱的 我又不是机器
I need time to... refill.
我需要时间...恢复
Yes, I'm wearing my baggy boxers!
没错 我穿着宽松的拳击短裤呢!
All right? No, I'm exhausted.
没事吧? 有事 我快精尽人亡了
Me and the wife are trying to get pregnant. Both of you?
我和我老婆在努力要怀上 你们俩都要?
Four times last night Karl, four.
昨晚做了4次 Karl 4次
And a half. I started snoring during.
还有半次 做着做着我就开始打鼾了
I had to pretend it was a love noise.
我只好假装自己在叫♥床♥
Nothing's ever straightforward with women, is it?
对女人来说没什么是简单的 对吧?
Ugh! I know what you mean.
啊! 我懂你
Actually, George, I've got this friend
George 其实我有个朋友
who really, really fancies this girl he works with.
看上了和他共事的女孩
Oh, yeah? Where does he work?
是吗? 他在哪儿工作?
In a job centre. Hm. Like you.
在职介所 嗯 跟你一样
Yes, exactly like me.
没错 跟我一样
Well, that's why you're friends; a lot in common.
所以你们才能成为朋友嘛 有很多共同点啊
Yes, loads.
是啊 很多
Anyway, my friend wants to ask this girl out, but he's not sure if she fancies him.
我朋友想约这个女孩 但不确定她喜不喜欢他
Plus she's got this weird rule about not dating people she works with.
而且她还有个奇怪的习惯 就是不跟同事约会
Rules are made to be broken, Karl.
规则就是用来打破的 Karl
Two words: "carpe diem".
一句话 - '及时行乐'
It means "Go for it" in German.
在德国这句话的意思是'努力争取'
Your friend should just do it. Yeah.
你朋友应该去试试 是啊
I'm going to. I'm going to tell my friend to ask her out.
我会的 我告诉我朋友约她
He could get run over by a bus tomorrow.
他明天可能会被公车撞到
Or fall down a well.
或者掉进井里
Yep. Or that.
对 没错
You know who we're talking about, don't you, George?
你知道我们在说谁 对吧George?
Karl, I work in fraud detection.
Karl 我天天跟骗子打交道
I know how to read between the lines.
我知道怎么听言外之意
It's Paul, innit?
是Paul对吧?
No.
不是
Graham?
Graham?
But... he doesn't even work here.
可是...他都不在这儿工作
Yeah, I'll see you later, George. WhWhWh...
好了 待会儿见 George 喂喂喂...
Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth.
用鼻子吸气 用嘴呼气
Clear your minds. Relax.
什么都别想 放轻松
Today is all about you.
今天是属于你们的
And earning time and a half for working on a Saturday! Yay!
周六加班还赚到了时间和福利哦! 哇!
Eh?!
诶?!
And a very warm welcome to the staff from the Kingstanding branch.
还有为金斯坦丁分部来的同事开的欢迎会
It's so nice to see so many of you at this mandatory health and wellbeing training event.
很高兴能在健康和幸福培训必修课上见到你们
And out through your mouth.
用嘴呼气
Ugh...
呃...
Do you want to join me, Denise, and run this together, managers united?
要跟我 一起主持这个 Denise 管理人协会?
I'd love to, but I'm a slave to my bunions.
我也想啊 可是我的囊肿不允许
And in through your nose.
用鼻子吸气
And out through your mouth.
用嘴呼气
Hi. Hi.
嗨 嗨
Can we talk later? Sshh, Karl, please.
待会儿能聊聊吗? 嘘 Karl
The "Healthy Staff Happy Staff" initiative
'做健康快乐的员工'
is all about putting your wellbeing first.
这个理念就是在强调快乐第一
Mummy! Mummy!
妈呀! 妈呀!
We'll be doing a number of exercises designed to relieve stress
我们会做一些可以减压的运动
and help you relax.
来帮助你们放松
Then later there'll be a refresher course
接着会有一个训练课程
on how to deal with physically violent jobseekers.
教你们怎么应对求职者的身体暴♥力♥
What have you done?
你们怎么了?
No-one's dead, Gray, we're just doing staff training.
没人去世 Gray 我们在做员工培训
OK, I'll come back later. No, mate.
好 我一会儿再来 别 伙计
it's Saturday, we're totally closed.
今天是周六 我们不营业
That's absolutely fine. About two?
太好了 2点呢?
Still closed, mate. Come back Monday.
也不营业 伙计 周一再来吧
Completely understand, Paul. I'll see you tomorrow.
明白了 Paul 明天见
OK, we're going to do an exercise called "This is me. Who are you?"
好了 接下来我们要做的活动叫“这就是我 你是谁?”
Denise. What?
Denise 什么?
Do you want to carry on? Oh, is it me?
你想接着说吗? 轮到我了吗?
Oh, hang on, darling.
等一下 亲爱的
Erm...
呃...
Just tell them to get into pairs.
让他们两人一组
Sorry, Trish, I'm lost. No, it's fine.
抱歉 Trish 我走神了 不 没关系
Get into pairs, everyone.
各位 两人一组
Howdy, partner!
你好 小伙伴!
What did you want to talk about?
你刚才想说什么?
It's probably the wrong time to talk about it, actually.
现在可能不适合谈那个
Although when is there a right time? I could fall down a well tomorrow.
不过什么时候才合适呢? 明天我可能就掉井里了
Karlos! Hello, mate!
Karlos! 你好 伙计!
You're a bit late, aren't you? Halften on a Saturday?
你迟到了 对吧? 周六的十点半?
I don't normally get up till Sunday!
我通常都要到周日才起床!
Oh, perfect. you two make a lovely pair.
太好了 你们俩一队吧
Actually, me and Karl have already partnered up.
其实我和Karl已经组好队了
Well, unpartner, then, and work with someone new.
那就分开来 另找别人吧
You two see each other every day. Don't you want a change?
你们俩每天都见面 不想换换吗?
Well, I'll find you somebody else.
我来帮你找其他人
Tyler.
Tyler
Natalie. Oh, he told me all about you.
Natalie 他把你的事都跟我说了
Oh, yeah? What did he say? Just that you were fit.
是吗? 他说什么了? 就说你们很合适
Me and Tyler have done these training days together before.
我和Tyler之前一起培训过一阵子
This bloke, yeah, legend.
这哥们 没错 是个传说
He probably cracks me up! He is the funniest person I've have ever met.
他很搞笑! 是我见过的最有意思的人
We are talking about Karl, right? Hah!
我们在聊Karl 对吧? 哈!
Natalie?
Natalie?
Come on, mate.
来吧 伙计
So, you're Tyler Kerrigan. You've worked at the jobcentre for -
你就是Tyler Kerrigan 你在职介所做
Karlos! Mate!
Karlos! 伙计!
You're not actually doing this bollocks, are you?
你不会真的要规规矩矩上课吧?
Nah. No. I'm only joking. Course you are!
不不 我开玩笑的 就说嘛!
Nutcase! Here. I've got something to make the day a bit more interesting.
疯子! 看 我带了点儿好玩的东西
Topped it up with a little cheeky something to get us started.
里面装满了罪恶的东西 能让我们嗨起来
Get involved. It's a bit early for that, innit?
喝吗? 这有点儿早吧?
It's not even that strong. I should probably have it with food.
这个功效没那么强 我最好先吃点东西
Ha ha ha ha ha!
哈哈哈哈哈!
That's so funny when you pretend to be all boring like that.
你假装正经的样子太好笑了
Yeah.
是啊
All right. Give it here.
好了 来吧
Whagwan dot com!
喝得开心!
OK, Angela, tell us what you've learned about Gary from Kingstanding.
好了 Angela 你从金斯坦丁来的Gary那儿知道了点什么
His name's Gary and he's from Kingstanding.
他叫Gary 来自金斯坦丁
Yeah. Hm? OK.
没错 嗯? 好的
Gary, what have you learned about Angela?
Gary 你从Angela那儿知道了点什么?
Oh, the mysterious enigma that is Angie!
Angie是最难解的谜题!
Well, she has a very dry sense of humour.
她没什么幽默感
We've had a giggle, haven't we? No.
不过我们有吃吃地笑过 没有
I keep knocking on the door, but she's not letting me in.
我一直在敲门 可她不让我进去
Ha ha ha! But by the end of the day I'm gonna crack her hard shell
哈哈哈! 不过最后我攻破了她厚厚的外壳
and find her soft centre. Well, good luck with that.
进入了她柔软的内心 你真是好运
Natalie, would you like to report back?
Natalie 你愿意做反馈报告吗?
Yes. This is Denise. She's forty-something.
好的 这位是Denise 她四十多了
A lady never tells.
不该透露女士的年龄哦
She's been a manager for six years
她做经理6年了
and she suffers from a number of health issues.
她身体不太好
Migraines, irritable bowel, ingrowing toenails.
偏头痛 肠易激 嵌甲
I don't like to talk about it. Well, don't, then.
我不太喜欢聊这些 那就别说了
Tell us what you've learnt about Natalie.
跟我们说说你所知道的Natalie
Yes, well I have met the most lovely wonderful and talented Natalie Mason.
Natalie Mason是我遇到最和蔼可亲最有才干的姑娘
Hello!
大家好!
She's deputy manager of Brownall.
她是布朗诺的副经理
Yay! And loves the work, God bless her.
哇! 她很喜欢这份工作 祝福她
She's saving for a flat and unbelievably she doesn't have a boyfriend.
她正攒钱买♥♥公♥寓♥ 难以置信的是她还没有对象