职介破事儿（2013）

I have to tire him out in other ways. Shh, you!
我就得用其他方式把他累趴 嘘 你!
So, target...
目标人物...
Caucasian, male, 46, last name Doolan,
白人 男性 46岁 姓Doolan
first name Robert, also known as Rob. What's the charge?
叫Robert 简称Rob 罪名是什么?
The usual car crash, whiplash bullcrap. Urgh.
普通车祸 废话 噢
He's been on ESA for the last 18 months.
我已经盯了他18个月了
Whoa.
哇哦
Why tonight?
为什么选今晚?
Thursday night - bin night.
周四晚上是收垃圾的日子
I just need one good shot of him lugging some heavy bags
我要来个致命一击 他会拖几大袋子东西丢去垃圾桶
into those bins and it's good night, Vienna.
而且今晚是个好日子 女神
Oh, no way. Karl's not coming.
哦不 Karl不来了
Karl? Why would Karl be coming?
Karl? 他怎么会来?
Well, cos he was the surprise.
因为他就是那个惊喜啊
You said invite a friend. I didn't mean Karl.
你说请朋友来的 我没说Karl
I meant one of your sexy gardening friends.
我说的是你那些性感的园艺朋友
So Karl was my date?
这么说Karl是我的相亲对象?
He was, yeah. I should have told him it was you,
是啊 我应该跟他说是你的
I'll just text him now. No, Tom, don't.
我来发短♥信♥给他 别 Tom
Why would Natalie be interested in Karl?
Natalie怎么会对Karl有兴趣呢?
Cos he's a good bloke. And he's really tidy.
他挺不错的啊 而且很爱干净
Well, it doesn't matter how tidy he is.
跟他爱不爱干净没关系
They're colleagues, so it's never going to happen. Isn't that right?
他们是同事 所以是不可能的 对吧?
God, yeah, absolutely right.
是啊 说得没错
Never mind.
没事了
Oh, please don't feel like a massive gooseberry, Natalie,
千万别觉得自己是颗大醋栗 Natalie
you're really more than welcome.
你很受欢迎的
Thanks. Do you mind if I finish this?
谢谢 你不介意我喝光吧?
I am so glad I'm not there.
幸好我没去
Trish is taking over my life.
Trish想掌控我的生活
I see her at work, I see her at home,
我上班的时候看到她 回到家还是看到她
even her hair is clogging up the plug hole.
她的头发还把下水孔堵了
And she's changed Tom. He's no fun any more.
Tom也被她改变了 一点儿都不好玩了
Move on. Your friend's as good as dead,
继续前行吧 就当你朋友死了
he's never coming back.
他已经一去不复返了
That's not fair, he was my friend first.
这不公平 是我先认识他的
George.
George
Oohhoohoohoohoohoo! Ooh!
噢吼吼吼吼吼! 噢!
Bingo McMingo.
McMingo你成功了
Be cool. No sudden movements,
淡定 不要突然移♥动♥
he's walking right into my...
他正走向我的...
shit.
靠
What? What? I forgot my camera.
怎么了? 怎么了? 我忘带相机了
Oi, you can use my phone.
你可以用我的手♥机♥
Oh, look at him.
看哪
Sneaky fish. Oh, oh, oh.
狡猾的鱼儿 哦哦哦
Still clinging on to that stick.
还是不肯放弃鱼饵
Who does he think he's kidding?
他以为他在跟谁玩儿?
Argh!
啊!
Is he all right? Yeah, he's fine, trust me.
他没事吧? 没事 相信我
No, George, I think he might actually be stuck.
不 George 我觉得他被困住了
Relax, it's a ruse, probably suspects he's being watched.
放松点 这是个计谋 可能他怀疑自己被监视了
Help. Anybody. Please!
救命 谁来救救我!
Anybody. I'm going to go and help him.
有人吗 我要去帮他一把
No! That's what he wants.
不行! 那样就中计了
Yeah, because he's stuck in a pile of bin bags.
是啊 就因为他被困在一堆垃圾袋里
Help, please, anybody! Karl!
救命 有人吗! Karl!
Help.
救命
Are you all right, mate? Oh, cheers.
你没事吧 伙计? 太好了
Can you help me up? You definitely can't get up yourself?
能拉我起来吗? 你肯定自己起不来了?
No, mate, I'm disabled.
不行 伙计 我是残疾人
Not if you try really hard?
怎么试都起不来?
No! OK.
不行! 好吧
Blimey.
啊呀
Don't you work at the job centre?
你是职介所的?
No. No, I do not work in the job centre.
不不 我不是职介所的
Well, why are you wearing that name badge then?
那你怎么戴着名牌?
Are you spying on me?
你们在监视我?
Up yours. Argh!
去你的 啊!
Oi!
喂!
Drive, drive, drive.
开车 开车 开车
Jesus Christ, Karl, what happened? Cover's blown.
天哪 Karl 怎么了? 被发现了
What's wrong with your hand? It's bin juice. Urgh!
你的手怎么了? 是脏水 呃!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
哇哇哇哇
George. Relax, Karl, I'm an advanced driver.
George 放心吧 Karl 我开车技术可好了
Anyway, there were no spare rooms so he took me in the shed.
总之那时候没空房♥了 他就把我带到小屋去了
Ooh. I don't mean in my bottom.
哇 我不是说我的屁♥股♥啦
Oh. And we did it next to the gardening tools.
哦 我们就在园艺工具旁边做了
Oh, Natalie, you 'hoe'!
Natalie 你这个'锄头'!
Trish!
Trish!
Come on, Trish, spill the beans,
快点 Trish 说说你的秘密
tell us about your first time. Oh, God.
跟我们说说你的第一次 天哪
Disaster!
灾难啊!
Duncan Harper -
Duncan Harper
he was a lifeguard at the leisure centre.
他是休闲中心的救生员
We had some fumblings in a lay-by on the A55,
我们在A55的停车带上乱摸
so I knew what was coming.
所以我知道接下来会发生什么
I always remember it was the same night the Berlin Wall came down,
我一直记得那天就是推♥翻♥柏林墙的日子
which is quite symbolic when you think about it.
所以特别好记
The Berlin Wall?
柏林墙?
Mmm. Wasn't that 1989?
嗯 那不是1989年吗?
Mmm. No. No, it was much later than that, wasn't it, Trish?
嗯 不不 比那晚多了 对吧Trish?
No. It was 1989.
不 就是1989年
I think I know when I popped my berry, Natalie, it was 1989.
我知道自己什么时候被开♥苞♥的 Natalie 就是1989年
But if you're 32...
但如果你现在32岁的话...
that would have made you seven.
那时候你才7岁
Hmm...
嗯...
Things were different in the '80s.
80年代跟现在不太一样
Karl, I need to talk to you about last night.
Karl 我要跟你谈谈昨晚的事
Is this because I stood your mate up? No.
是因为我放了你朋友鸽子吗? 不是
Is it about the disabled man in the bin bags? What?
是因为那个在垃圾堆里的残疾人? 什么?
Doesn't matter. What are you talking about? Tom. Didn't he tell you?
没什么 你想说什么? Tom 他没告诉你吗?
He found out I've been lying about my age.
他知道我对他隐瞒了真实年龄
Really? Oh, no.
真的吗? 噢不
I think I might just need to give him some space.
我觉得最好给他点时间
Good idea. Do you think? Yeah.
好主意 真的吗? 是啊
I mean, it's great that you're round the flat all the time.
我是说你一直待在公♥寓♥里挺好的
But I have been there a lot recently. Youyouyou really have,
但我最近去得够多的了 你你你 没错
and I think it might be starting to get to him.
我觉得你开始俘获他的心了
I had no idea. Oh, it was awful, Karl,
我不知道 太可怕了 Karl
I had to get away, I just left poor Natalie there.
我不得不走 只好把可怜的Natalie留在那儿了
Natalie?
Natalie?
Our Natalie? What was she doing at the flat?
我们这的Natalie? 她怎么会在公♥寓♥里?
She was your blind date.
她是你的相亲对象啊
T-Tom said you were inviting one of your friends.
Tom说你会邀请你的朋友
I did, Natalie's my friend. No, she's not.
对啊 Natalie就是我朋友 不 她才不是
Not one of your 'friend' friends.
不是你的那些朋友
It doesn't matter anyway, Karl,
已经无关紧要了 Karl
because you and Natalie are work colleagues. It's not going to happen.
因为你和Natalie是同事 你们是不可能的
As you've refused an offer of work, I'm stopping your benefits.
因为你拒绝了一次工作机会 我要取消你的福利
That's not gonna happen.
你不能这么做
Decision Maker's Guide, section four, paragraph nine.
《决策者指南》 第四章 第九节
'All claimants are entitled to refuse work on the grounds of religious belief'.
'所有申请人有权因为宗教信仰拒绝工作'
What are your religious beliefs?
你的宗教信仰是什么?
We both know I don't have to tell you that.
我们都清楚我没必要告诉你
There's no eating in the job centre.
职介所不能吃东西
There is if you're type one diabetic.
如果你是I型糖尿病患者就能吃
As part of your Claimant Commitment,
基于你的申请人承诺
you're supposed to ask friends about vacancies.
你应该向朋友打听工作职位
Correct.
没错