IT狂人（2006）

It's such a lovely day, shall we go to the park?
好想法 咱们就去公园里吃午餐
Yeah, let's have a lovely lunch in the park.
罗伊 你觉得如果我上学的时候不那么用功
Roy, do you think if I hadn't paid so much attention in school
长大后会与现在不同吗
I'd be a different person?
不会
No.
我们没法准时去本·建德森的派对了
We're going to be late for Ben Genderson's party.
那又如何 我不想去那个派对 要是去了那个派对
So? I don't want to go to that thing. If we go to that party,
你知道我得重复多少次
do you know how many times I'm going to have to say,
"重..." 那句我常说的话
"Have you..." The thing that I say?
我们得快点 我们会有麻烦的
We've got to hurry up, we're going to be in trouble.
我是不会跑着回去的
I'm not running.
那你就走快点嘛
Can you do a fast walk?
不行
No.
那我先走了 到时候见
I'm going to do a fast walk. See you there.
我要去上班
I need to be at work.
不好意思 整条街都封闭了 有可疑包裹
Sorry, sir. Whole street's closed. Suspicious package.
走吧 我们绕着回去
Come on, let's go the long way round.
我们这下连演讲都赶不上了
We'll miss the presentation.
我们已经迟到了 我们会有麻烦的
We're already late. We'll get in trouble.
你冷静点
Calm down.
罗伊 我冷静不了 我们该怎么办
I can't, Roy. What are we going to do?
莫斯 这没什么大不了的
Moss, it doesn't matter.
我们会有麻烦的
We're going to get in trouble.
你不会有什么麻烦的
You're not going to get in trouble.
只有孩子才会有麻烦
Getting in trouble is something that happens to children.
你是成年人了
You're a grown man.
过来
Come on.
我们要不翘掉得了
Why don't we bunk off?
啥
What?!
我今天原本也打算避开珍的 要不我们就...
I was hoping to avoid Jen today anyway. Why don't we just...
我们就不去上班了 出去找点乐子
We'll bunk off and make a day of it. It'll be a laugh.
天呐 我们不能这样
Oh, gosh, I've got to take this in.
我小时候没翘过课 长大后没翘过班
I've never bunked off in my life!
我们翘班做什么 去哪
What... what... what will we do? Where will we go?
就做些翘班干的事咯
You know, we'll do bunking off kind of things.
我们在警♥察♥旁边
Should we be talking this
谈论这个真的没关系吗 这可是违法的
close to the police? I mean, it is illegal...
当然不违法 除非你还是个学生 你别紧张啊
Not unless you're supposed to be in school! Will you relax?
我太激动了 罗伊
I'm excited, Roy.
这简直跟在黑客帝国里吃了伟哥一样
This is like taking the blue pill in the Matrix.
翘班这种事 以前的我从来不会这么做
I mean, bunking off. The old me would never have done that!
跟那家伙说再见
Say goodbye to that guy.
那家伙已经成历史了 嘭 他没了
That guy's history! BANG! He's gone!
你能别在这说"嘭"吗 这里可藏着颗炸♥弹♥
Could you not say "Bang!" There's a bloody bomb somewhere!
算了 咱们走吧
Come on, let's just go.
你能不能别表现的像个嫌疑犯一样
Would you stop looking so suspicious!
这正是在本·建德森入职一周后
Which is why after one week with us,
我们要为他庆功的原因
we honour Ben Genderson.
来嘛 本 你也说几句啊
Come on, Ben, say a few words.
我不知道该怎么...
I don't know what to...
发生了如此令人高兴的事
Such a lovely thing to happen.
我从来没想到这么大的公♥司♥
I never thought that a major corporation
竟然对员工个人如此关注
would be able to focus on one individual like this.
在我任职的上一家公♥司♥里 我觉得自己非常渺小
At my last company, I felt rather insignificant,
非常感谢大家 真的
so it's appreciated, it really is.
干杯
Cheers.
别这么快举杯啊 本
Don't raise your glass too soon, Ben,
因为这完全是一场骗局
cos this has all been one big ruse.
今天的主角根本不是你
It isn't your day at all.
没错 我觉得今天
That's right. I thought it high time
理应让IT部门做主角
to give the IT Department the attention they deserve.
莫克和罗瑞在哪
Where are Mark and Ray?
他们去吃午餐还没回来
They're not back from lunch yet.
真的吗 我还特地为他们请了乔治·卢卡斯
Really? I flew George Lucas in to see them as a treat.
好吧珍 那我们就替他们喝香槟
Oh, well, Jen, more champagne for us.
大家扭起来
Let the revels begin!
就是这样
Oh, yes.
坐在汽车里
Sitting on the bus.
驶在大路上
On the open road.
悠哉
Kicking back.
唯二无♥耻♥翘班者也
Just a pair of cheeky bunkers.
唯二游手好闲者也
Couple of ne', er do wells.
没错
Yeah.
罗伊 我们这算是在流浪吗
Roy, can I clarify something? Are we now loitering?
算是吧
Erm... yeah.
因为我感觉这像是在旅游
Because it feels like travelling.
当然 不过我们并不是去这辆车的终点站
Sure, but we don't want to go where this bus is going.
所以算是部分流浪
So there's an element of loitering.
毫无目的 -正是如此
There's an aimlessness. - Exactly.
是啊 谁想每次都去计划好的地方
Yeah! Who'd want to end up going to where they wanted to be?
只有人类才会这么想
That's what the man wants.
去他妈的人类
Sock it to 'em.
愚蠢的人类
Fools!
罗伊 咱们瞪眼睛吧
Roy, let's glare.
什么
What?
咱们向路人瞪眼睛吧 就跟黑社会一样
Let's glare at people, like a couple of tough nuts.
好啊 瞪谁?
Okay! Who?
咱们就瞪那个赶着上班的屌♥丝吧
Let's glare at this sucker on his way to work.
只知道给公♥司♥卖♥♥命
Feeding the corporate machine.
他上来了
He's coming up.
他上来了 -他上车了 不是吧
He's coming up. - He's getting on the bus! Oh, no.
你干嘛非挑他 挑谁不行啊
Why did you suggest him? You could've suggested anybody.
你看什么屌♥东西看
What are you looking at?
看错人了 我们认错人了
We weren't. We thought you were someone else.
碍你屌♥事
What's it to you?
不好意思 我们翘班了 他有点激动
I'm sorry. We're bunking off, and he's excited.
我们翘班了耶
We're bunking off!
罗伊害怕气球
Roy has a fear of balloons.
害怕气球
A fear of balloons!
这是我听说过最疯狂的事
That's the craziest thing I've ever bloody heard!
你的酒
Some wine for you.
不好意思 我要的是红酒
Sorry, I asked for red.
不好意思
Oh, sorry.
不 算了 给我吧
No, no, no, leave it.
这派对搞的挺成功的
This has been a success.
我真的非常开心
I have had a lovely, lovely time.
正如之前所说的
As thingy was saying earlier,
身在大公♥司♥里很容易被忽略
it's easy to go unrecognised in a big corporation,
真的非常感谢 干杯
so it's appreciated, it really is. Cheers.
别这么快举杯啊
Don't raise your glasses too soon,
因为这场骗局本身也是骗局
cos this ruse has also been a ruse.
女士们 先生们
Ladies and gentlemen,
请容我向你们介绍
let me introduce to you our
新的雇佣与解雇部门部长 本·建德森
new head of hiring and firing, Ben Genderson.
好了本 你在这鸿门宴上也转了半天了
So, Ben, you've been circulating throughout this fake party,
现在揭晓答案
coming to conclusions.
谁是占着茅坑不拉屎的
Who's the obvious dead wood?
好的 那边的保罗
Well, yes. Well, there's Paul over there,
他把自己购物的钱算在公♥司♥账上
he's been putting his shopping on expenses.
这里的詹姆士 他不会写字
James here, he can't spell,
还有 不好意思 你叫什么名字
and... Sorry, what's your name?
杰瑞米
Jeremy.
杰瑞米没错 杰瑞米是个酒鬼
Jeremy, yes. Jeremy's a drunk.
还有珍 珍缺少最基本的计算机技能
And Jen. Jen lacks basic computer skills,
比如她认为IT代表"互联网那些玩意"
like thinking that IT stands for "Internet things".
是啊 我不需要知道那些东西
Yeah. I don't really need to know about those things.
我是公♥关♥经理 我管理团队 是团队领导
I'm a relationship manager. I manage my team, I'm a team leader.
那你的团队在哪呢
And where's your team now?
不好意思 我有点糊涂了
I'm sorry, I'm confused.
这到底是不是我的派对
Is this my party or not?
我们在做什么