IT狂人（2006）

Goodbye.
她贱极了
She... is... evil.
"星空法则"第三次被印证了
Spacestar Ordering success story number three.
由于纹身感染 我被截肢了
My tattoo got infected, so they've had to cut off my arm!
我要装机械手了
I am getting a robot hand!
真的太棒了 非常棒
Beautiful. Really beautiful.
谢谢
Thank you.
这首歌♥真的太棒了 棒极了
It's just a great song. Really, really great.
如果非要让我提点意见的话
If you put a gun to my head and force me to give one criticism,
就是这歌♥稍微有点长
it'd be that maybe it goes on just a bit too long.
除此之外都很完美 -好吧
Apart from that, perfect. - Okay.
听着蒂姆 玛丽今晚来不了了
Listen, Tim, Mary's not going to make it tonight.
那我们的伴唱怎么办
What'll we do about backing vocals?
我可以上台
I'd love to!
莫斯 问你个问题
Moss, can I ask you a question?
说
Sure.
我一定要上法庭吗
Do I have to testify?
罗伊 大主意你自己拿
I can't make that decision for you, Roy.
你就问自己一个问题
You've just got to ask yourself one thing...
如果你不站出来
if you don't take the stand,
那个唇魔还要
how many more unsolicited bum kisses will be
霸占多少人的屁♥股♥
administered by that lip-happy bastard?
你说得对 我确实想上法庭
No, you're right, I know you're right. I do want to testify.
我只是怕别人笑话我
I'm just afraid that they're going to laugh at me.
如果他们都像珍那样呢
What if they're all...what if they're all like Jen?
他们不会笑的 罗伊
They're not going to laugh, Roy.
没人像珍那样
No-one's like Jen. No-one.
我才发现她是个非常奇葩的姑娘
I've come to realise she's actually a very odd person.
各位 今晚好运
Well, good luck tonight, everyone!
珍 你是史迪威·尼克斯的粉丝吗
Are you a big Stevie Nicks fan, Jen?
史迪威·尼克斯? 是啊
Stevie Nicks? Yeah, yeah.
天哪 感谢各位 我太激动了
Oh, God. Thanks so much for this, guys, I'm so excited.
我从没上台表演过
I've never done anything like this before.
真不敢相信你们愿意让我上台
I can't believe you want me to do it!
我不会让你们失望的
I won't let you down.
诺曼 我们谈过了
So, Norman, we've had a talk.
我们决定乐队还是得
We think we're going to go back to
回到没有键盘手的状态
not having a keyboard in the band.
不是吧
Oh, no!
不好意思 不过我想你们很快就会复出的对吧
Yeah, I'm sorry, but we'll see you both again soon, yeah?
等等 我也被开除了?
Wait! I'm out too?
被告没有事先告知
And the defendant gave no indication
他会亲你的屁♥股♥吗
that he had any intention of kissing you on the bottom?
没有任何告知
No indication whatsoever.
他毫无预兆地亲了我的屁♥股♥
He just kissed me on my bottom. Out of nowhere.
有什么不良后果吗
What was the result?
我经常做噩梦
Well, I had nightmares about it.
还不停地洗屁♥股♥
And I can't stop washing my bottom.
而且对按♥摩♥师这个行当失去了信心
And I find it hard to trust masseurs.
他亲的具体♥位♥置在哪
Where exactly did he kiss you?
中间 -屁♥股♥中间?
It was in the middle. - In the middle of your bottom?
在股沟的左边一点点
Well, just to the left of the cleftal horizon.
崔纳曼先生 请用通俗的说法
In layman's terms, please, Mr. Trenneman.
法官大人 屁♥股♥沟的左边一点点
Oh, I'm sorry, your Honour. Just to the left of the bum line.
在大腿以上吗
Just above the thigh?
是在大腿以上
Well above the thigh.
在我的屁♥股♥上
It was on my bottom.
有没有可能是这样
Although it is true, is it not,
有些人说的屁♥股♥
that what some people call their bottom,
实际上是指屁♥股♥靠大腿的那部分
others might call their hip.
他亲的就是屁♥股♥
No, he kissed my bottom, sir.
但... -他亲的就是屁♥股♥
But is it not true... - He kissed me on my bottom!
大家怎么都不笑啊
Why is no-one laughing?
这时不该笑 珍
It's no laughing matter, Jen.
我们宇宙学家 对待这种事都很认真
We Spaceologists take this kind of thing very seriously.
这些人都是宇宙学家?
Are all these people Spaceologists?
这个案子将扳倒整个按♥摩♥产业
Yes, this trial could bring the massage industry to its knees.
所以他们都十分严肃
And you'll find they take this case with the gravity it deserves.
崔纳曼先生 你能否
Perhaps Mr. Trenneman might be able to
在这张图上示意一下
help us with the aid of this diagram.
请把这张被告的照片
Could you please place this picture of the defendant...
贴在你认为他亲你的地方
on the area where you say he kissed you?
这就是意外发生的地方
That was where the incident happened.
我觉得很准确 -你觉得很准确
I think that's accurate. - Oh, you think that is accurate?
对 -你刚才还说"确定"
Yes. - Only a moment ago you were quite sure,
现在又说"觉得"
yet now you only think.
你在曲解我的意思
You're twisting my words.
能否理解为一位艺术家
Is it not true that this may simply be an artist,
骄傲地在自己的作品上签名
proud of his work, signing off with a flourish?
这不是重点
That is not the point.
谢谢崔纳曼先生 我问完了
Yes, thank you, Mr. Trenneman. That will be all.
我的屁♥股♥不是画布
My arse is not a canvas!
我已经问完了 谢谢
I said, that will be all, thank you.
我的屁♥股♥不是用来亲的
My bottom is not a kissing post, sir.
你可以用华丽的词藻掩饰这场意外
Okay, you can dress this up however you like, with your fancy words,
但事实是 坐在那的人在我毫无防备的情况下
but the truth remains that man, sitting there, kissed me on my bike rack
亲了我的"底盘"
and I was not expecting it
这让昂贵的按♥摩♥变得毫无价值
and it rendered an expensive massage worthless.
法官大人
Your Honour, please.
我既然来到了这
And I am here today
就不能让任何人的"嫩肉"再被他亲吻
so that no man need be kissed on his sweetmeats by this man ever again,
除非是他们因为某种原因提前安排好的
unless they have arranged it beforehand for some reason.
你能安静点吗 -不能
Will you be silent? - I will not be silent!
我要大声疾呼
I will never be silent!
直至将那张臭嘴打入大牢
I will not stop until those lips are behind bars!
你为何如此大胆
How dare you?
我曾相信过你 我的屁♥股♥可不是用来卖♥♥的
I trusted you. My trouser hams are not for sale, sir!
我竟把屁♥股♥交到你的手里
I put my arse in your hands.
我说完了
I rest my case.
我要一辈子都用机器手
I'd have used my robot hand for good.
醒醒
Wake up!