善地

The Good Place S01E10

Part 4 Dec. 11, 2019, 8:32 p.m.

我们还没把婚戒取回来
and we haven't picked up the rings.
好了这里有问题
Okay, well, there's an issue there
我认为对珠宝商而言
involving what I consider to be unfair labor practices
这种作业方式不公平
on the part of the jeweler.
我们还没举♥行♥单身派对
And we never had a bachelor party
因为你无法选出地点或时间
because you could never settle on a location or time.
对不起你说得对
I'm sorry, you were right.
我处理不了这些事
This is too much for me.
不用管我了你去结婚吧
You should just leave me here and go get married.
嗯然而实情是
Yeah, here's the thing, bud:
我还有一个月才结婚呢
My wedding isn't for another month.
这只是个测试
This was a test to see
看你到底能不能当伴郎
if you could handle being my best man,
结果不出我所料你惨败啊
and, just as I predicted, you failed, miserably.
不是吧我倒是如释重负了
No. No, I mean, I'm... I'm relieved,
但这挺丢脸的
but this is embarrassing.
没关系兄弟
It's okay, bud.
显然都在我计划之中
Obviously, I prepared for this.
我们出去玩一晚吧
Let's just go have a nice night.
我请你喝酒
I'll buy you a beer.
三十分钟了奇迪
30 minutes, Chidi?
选一家酒吧就选了三十分钟
We have been trying to pick a bar for 30 minutes.
跟你做朋友简直是下凡历劫啊
It is literally impossible to be your friend.
你连一个简单的决定都做不了
You're incapable of making a single decision.
我知道我这人总是犹豫不决
Look, I know I can be indecisive,
但多花几分钟找一家最棒的酒吧
but what's the harm in taking a few extra minutes
又不会死人...
to find the perfect...
奇迪
Chidi?
你说得对我必须作出选择
You're right. I just need to make a decision.
我要看三个女人的眼睛凭直觉选
I'm gonna look each of these women in the eye, trust my gut,
找到心之所向
and figure out how I feel.
不是吧真有用了吗
You're kidding. That worked?
太好了去吧
Great! Go do it!
女士们先生们
Ladies and gentlemen,
我们结婚吧
let's get ready to married.
给你露一手
Yo, check it.
太棒了
This is great.
我们俩竟然曾经
At different moments during our time here,
都以为这个「缺心眼舞男」是我们的真爱
we both thought that tragic Mike over here was our one true love,
结果他现在跟一个机器人结婚了
and now he is marrying whatever Janet is.
你说得没错确实有些奇怪
I suppose you're right. It is a bit strange.
我想读一首诗
I'd like to read a poem.
「珍妮特我的数码皇后」
"Janet, my digital queen.
「珍妮特我们敢于追梦
"Janet, we can dare to dream.
发一张你内心的裸照给我」
Send nude pics of your heart to me."
「杰克逊维尔美洲虎队地上最强」
"Jacksonville jaguars rule!"
杰森我重启后丧失了知识库
Jason, when I was rebooted, and I lost all my knowledge,
我很迷茫很无助
I was confused and disoriented,
但你一直都待我很好
but you were always kind to me.
根据我在三秒内搜索到的231600首歌♥曲电影
And according to the central theme of 231,600 songs, movies,
诗歌♥以及小说的主题而言
poems, and novels that I researched
我要说的这份誓言就是
for these vows in the last three seconds,
爱就是如此
that's what love's all about.
有人反对这桩婚姻吗
Does anybody here object to this marriage?
完全是馊主意
Yes, it is a terrible idea.
-当然反对啊... 必须反对 -驳回
- Of course we do... how could we not object? - Overruled.
杰森你愿意娶我为妻吗
Jason. Do you want me to be your wife?
-愿意 -我也愿意嫁给你
- Yeah. - I want you to be my husband.
-棒哎 -我赋予自己权力
- Tight. - So, by the power vested in me,
我宣布我们结为夫妻
by me, I now pronounce us husband and wife.
我们结婚了
We did it!
可以亲你了吗不会触电吧
Can I kiss you, or will I be electrocuted?
只有亲了才知道
Only one way to find out.
尽情亲吧棒哎妹子
Get some! Got get it, girl!
我就配合演出了
I'm just going with it now.
有趣发现他不是我的伴侣时
It's funny... I was devastated when I found out
我心灰意冷
that he wasn't my soul mate,
但现在觉得逃过一劫啊
but now I think I've dodged a bullet.
他是「绵羊兴」啊
He's a simple man.
我有次看他吃完了一整卷绝缘胶布
I once watched him eat electrical tape right off the roll.
他还以为那是变质了的水果糖卷儿呢
He thought it was a fruit by the foot that had gone bad.
谢谢你今天对我这么贴心
Thank you for being such a great friend to me today.
客气啥辣妹我挺你
'Course, hot stuff. I got your back.
埃莉诺我就是想知道你跟奇迪谈过了吗
Eleanor, hey, I just wanted to see if you'd talked to Chidi.
谈过了
Yeah, I did.
你不用说具体谈了什么
I mean, you don't have to tell me what you said.
我就是想知道你还好吗
I just wanted to see if you're okay.
天你真是个好人
Man, you are a good person.
说真的我生前要是认识你和塔哈妮奇迪
I swear, if I had known you and tahani and Chidi on earth,
我说不定死后真能来「善地」呢
I might have for real gotten into the good place.
我最爱的三杯酸奶啊
it's my three favorite yogurts.
我们之前说的话呢
Hey, about what happened earlier...
我今天不是正常的自己
I've been kind of all over the place today.
我一小时前还觉得建宇是我的灵魂伴侣
An hour ago, I thought Jianyu was my soul mate,
而这也很科学
and the fact that that kind of made sense
这就表明我们永远都不会是灵魂伴侣
means you and I could never be meant for each other.
而且建宇和珍妮特结婚了
Plus, Jianyu's married to Janet now.
好吧
Okay.
啥
What?
我确实爱你
I do love you,
但是把你当成救星那样喜欢
but I think more in a best friend afterlife savior kind of way.
我其实不是喜欢「师生恋」
I'm not so much "Hot for teacher" as I am
只是很感激有些呆萌
"Eternally grateful for semi-cute,
身材却超棒的老师
surprisingly ripped teacher."
奇迪我也得要和道歉
Chidi, I also have to apologize.
我得知建宇不是我的灵魂伴侣时
It's just that when I found out that Jianyu wasn't my soul mate,
我只是想抓住一根救命稻草
I-I desperately needed something to keep me afloat,
而你刚好就是那根稻草
and, well, you were the nearest lifeboat, as it were.
我们之间的感情确实很特别
And yes, we do have the sort of connection
但那是高智商之间惺惺相惜的感觉
that only two highly educated, sophisticates could have,
但这不是真爱
but it's not true love.
珍妮特和建宇那才是真爱
True love is what Janet and Jianyu have.
是啊啥
Yeah. What?
我们也想跟你继续聊
We would love to stay and chat,
但我们得去找迈克尔
but we need to find Michael.
埃莉诺我好像想到怎么让你留下来了
Eleanor, I think I figured out a way for you to stay.
是吗
Really?
我也一起来
I... I'll come too.
啥啊
What?