善地

The Good Place S01E05

Part 2 Dec. 11, 2019, 8:32 p.m.

我刚意识到
You know, I just realized
我有毯子所以我准备去睡一小觉
that I have blankets, so I'm going to take a nap
用我已有的几条毛毯盖着
using the several blankets that I already have.
晚安
Good night.
你什么情况直说吧
What's wrong? Out with it.
我就是有点累需要休息一下
I'm just tired, need a break.
没什么事
No big deal.
你现在这副样子
The way you're talking to me right now?
「没事啊没啥啊」我清楚这一套
"Everything's cool, no big deal". I know that move.
我跟男友说「没什么」时
When I told a boyfriend something was "No big deal,"
一般都是从「你侄子刚卖♥♥给我一些大♥麻♥」
it meant anything from "I just bought weed from your nephew,"
到「我去年瞒着你跟你前女友成闺蜜了
to "I secretly befriended your ex-girlfriend last year,
结果发展太好她邀我当伴娘了」
things got out of hand, and now I'm her bridesmaid."
长见识了
Wow.
跟你的事迹相比我是真没事
Okay, well, in this case, it really is no big deal.
大哥你有事隐瞒啊
Dude, you're hiding something!
-怎么回事 -没事
- What's wrong? - Nothing!
到底有什么事
What... is... wrong?
居民排名
建宇第二位
Jianyu second.
真棒不愧是我男人
Well done, my love.
我第几位呢
So where am I?
埃莉诺第六位
Eleanor... 6th?
不是吧
Come on.
不
No.
我倒数第二位
I'm second to last.
妈妈这是我为你画的
Mummy, I made you this.
这是我们在花♥园♥看到的漂亮鸟儿
It's the pretty bird we saw in the garden.
谢谢你塔哈妮画得不错
Thank you, Tahani. It's very competent.
我也完成了一只小鸟
I made a bird, as well.
用反光合金制成
I worked in a reflective alloy,
为人类高悬一面镜子
holding up a mirror to mankind
让其反思虐待动物的行为
and its mistreatment of these defenseless animals.
太优秀了卡米拉
Excellent, Kamilah.
有布朗库西「雕塑家」和卡普尔「导演」的风采啊
I sense the influence of Brancusi and Kapoor.
看来你已经走出了构造阶段
It seems you're moving out of your structural period,
更倾向抽象概念了
and more into conceptual abstraction.
好眼力母亲
Good eye, Mother.
我不愿再展示客观呈现了
I grew tired of objective representation.
我相信受众有眼光
I trust my audience.
我画的鸟儿戴了帽子
My birdie has a hat.
知道了真不错塔哈妮
Yes, well done, Tahani.
-到底怎么了 -没什么
- What's wrong? - Nothing's wrong.
你能消停一下吗
Would you stop doing that?
-行行 -到底怎么了
- Okay, fine! - What's wrong?
你想知道怎么回事吗
You want to know what's wrong?
你是个「全职大♥麻♥烦」
You are a full-time job.
我每天醒来埃莉诺在眼前
I wake up, there's Eleanor.
然后教埃莉诺教一整天
I spend all day teaching Eleanor.
一直教到晚上才去睡觉
And then it's, "Good night, Eleanor."
做梦时梦到我奶奶真好
This is a nice dream, my grandma's here.
不对那是埃莉诺的脸
Wait, she's got Eleanor's face!
还不知为何长着触手
And tentacles for some reason.
我还以为你喜欢教我
I thought you liked teaching me.
如今变成了你的累赘了吗
So now I'm just some huge burden for you?
是啊
Yes!
就是累赘啊
Of course you are!
我都上天堂了
I am in paradise!
我应该尽享天堂之乐
I should be doing paradise things,
比如游船于湖中怡然自得品着小酒
like rowing out on a lake with a good bottle of wine,
吟诗作赋
reading French poetry.
你这叫天堂享乐啊
That's your idea of paradise?
我必须要继续帮你
You know, and I can't stop helping you,
因为不帮就是逃避道德责任
because then I am shirking my ethical duty.
骑虎难下备受煎熬啊
It's an impossible position!
如果你觉得教书让你心力交瘁
You know what, if you're so stressed from writing on a chalkboard
那你就走啊
why don't you just leave?
我们可以对外假装是灵魂伴侣
We can pretend to be soul mates in public,
但私下里根本不用见面
but other than that, we don't have to see each other!
我没意见马上就搬走
Fine with me! I'll move out right now.
好
Fine!
下午好
Good afternoon.
大家都知道
As you all may remember
市中心最近出现了一个裂洞
a sinkhole recently opened up in the town center.
遗憾的是情况恶化了
The situation, sadly, has worsened.
现在开始不管发生什么事
Starting right now, no one may go outside
大家都不能外出
under any circumstances.
走出家门可能会引起灾难性事件
Leaving your homes could result in catastrophic damage,
置你与全宇宙于险境之中
to you and to the very fabric of the universe.
就这样
Okay, bye.
这下都要待在这里了
Or we could both just stay here.
衷心希望你在「善地」生活幸福
We hope you enjoy your eternal stay in the Good Place.
欢迎
水疗中心供您享受
Take advantage of our day spa
珍妮特解您一切之需
or Janet a magical assistant who can get you whatever you want.
能关掉吗
You mind turning that off?
同一段视频连着播两天了
It's been playing on a loop for two days.
全街区都掉线了
The whole Neighborhood is offline.
只能看「迎新视频」了
We only get the welcome channel.
我倒是不想看电视
I would love to not watch TV,
但你也不教学了
but you canceled school.
我什么时候变得爱学习了都怪你
What have you done to me, you monster?
碗盘都堆成山了
Look at all these dishes piling up.
我之前都直接扔进水池
I used to just throw them in the sink,
等早上醒来就会发现都奇迹般地干净了
and they'd be magically cleaned by morning.
因为我洗了我把碗盘都洗了
I did that. I cleaned the dishes.
那这些碗盘是怎么回事
Then what's up with these bad boys?
你真是人间极品
You are unbelievable.
你还生气呢
Are you still upset?
-还没翻篇吗 -怎么翻啊
- You're not over it yet? - How can I be over it?
我们都好几天没说过话了
We haven't discussed it or even spoken for days.
听起来你是过了一个
Well, it sounds like you've had
没有「全职大♥麻♥烦」的假期啊
a really nice vacation from your full-time job.
把话给我讲清楚吧
Get your story straight, bro!
两位我是迈克尔
Hey, guys, it's Michael.
迈克尔你怎么过来了啊
Hi, Michael, what a lovely surprise.
我也想叙叙旧
I'd love to make small talk
我最近在提升交际技能表现不俗呢
I've been practicing, too. I'm amazing at it.
但我还有急事
But I'm in a bit of a rush here.
这是巴特和妮娜
This is Bart and Nina.
他们刚好就住在裂洞附近
They live right next door to the, sinkhole,
所以得安置一下他们
so they obviously need a place to stay.
你是我的助理我就想
I was wondering, as my assistant,
能不能让他们在你家住几天
maybe you could put them up for a while?
没问题
Of course.
这必须可以
Don't... don't think twice.
好就暂住一阵子而已
Okay, shouldn't take long.
一个小时... 到十一个月之间吧
Between an hour and... 11 months.
就这个期间吧我走了
Somewhere in there. Okay, bye.
千万别外出
Don't go outside.
各位好欢迎出席困在室内的早午餐第三天
Hello, everyone, and welcome to day three of our brunch siege.
我一整晚没睡为大家准备了一天有趣的活动
I stayed up all night to plan a full day of fun activities.
看下我制♥作♥的活动表就可以了
Just check the schedule I made.
塔哈妮你最棒了
Tahani, you are truly the best.
一般人都会这么想对吧昂里埃特
Yes, you would think so, wouldn't you, Henriette?
还是倒第二啊
Still second to last.
艺术品拍卖♥♥募捐宴
塔哈妮
Tahani!
这场拍卖♥♥很可能会以失败告终颜面扫地
This auction threatens to be an embarrassing failure.
五百二十万这成绩不错啊
5.2 million isn't bad.
太中规中矩了
It's very "Middle-thermometer."
你搞砸会让整个家族跟着蒙羞