某人某地（2022）

它在商店里时看着好伤心
He looked so sad in the store,
但现在看起来有点生气
but now he just looks kind of pissed.
我知道感情用事买♥♥个小动物不是好事
I know it's bad to emotionally impulse-buy a living creature,
-但我就... -对 我不鼓励这么做
- but I just-- - Yeah, I don't condone that.
棉花
那些是无菌器材 所以麻烦你...
Those are sterile, so if you could just not...
抱歉
Oh, sorry.
狗 我应该去做个美甲
A dog. I should've just gotten a mani-pedi.
我找出了以前的笛子
Hey, I dug out my old flute.
我在练习一首歌♥ 打算在合唱练习时表演
I'm working on a song for choir practice.
不会很好听 但反正...
It's not gonna be great but, you know...
-乔尔 -我在
- Joel? - Yeah.
你不非得留下它
You know, you don't have to keep him.
但那样就太不道德了
But that'd be really terrible.
深呼吸 这与人品无关
Take a breath. It's not like a character judgment.
只是看上去现在不是你养宠物的最佳时机
You just seem like maybe it's not the right time, that's all.
如果你可以带它几天
If you could foster for a couple of days,
我给这小家伙
I'll work on finding a good home
找个好人家 怎么样
for this little guy. Okay?
好 我想...可以
Okay, I think... Yeah.
-谢谢 蒂芙尼 -客气
- Thank you, Tiffani. - Yeah, no doubt.
老天 它讨厌我
Oh god, he hates me.
不如你给它笑一个
Why don't you try smiling for the little guy?
不是这样苦笑
Well, not like that!
某 人 某 地
第一季 第五集
大厨餐馆
莎姆
Hey, Sammy!
-你好吗 -好
- Hey, how are you? - Good.
天哪
Jesus.
我能告诉你 作为搞科学的人
I can tell you, as a man of science,
气象学家就是一群草包
meteorologists are a bunch of ding-dongs.
弗雷德 我能问个问题吗
Fred, can I ask you somethin'?
当然
Sure.
你会感觉被人看不起吗
You ever feel judged?
还真有
In fact, I do,
但现在我们没时间理会那些
but we don't have that kind of time right now.
怎么问这个
Why do you ask?
-我不想让你无聊 -说来听听
- I don't wanna bore you. - Ah, bore me.
只是 我的...
It's just, my...
我姐姐和她朋友整天信仰和家庭
My sister and her friends are all like faith and family
信仰和家庭 信仰和家庭
and faith and family and faith and family,
而且她们非常看不上我的生活 知道吗
and they're so judgmental about my life, right?
但我姐姐竟然自己骗自己
But my sister has actually convinced herself
说她只跟丈夫瑞克上过床
that she's only ever slept with her husband, Rick.
但据我所知 她至少漏算了十二个人
But by my count, she is skipping over at least a dozen names.
-但真正劲爆的是 -是什么
- But the real kicker - Yeah?
跟她一起整天信仰和家庭的闺蜜切芮蒂
is that her faith and family best friend Charity
跟我姐姐的丈夫上♥床♥了
is sucking my sister's husband's dick.
你听明白了吗
Are you following?
明白了 这一点不无聊
I follow. And this is not boring.
但问题是 如果我告诉了她
But the problem is, like, if I tell her,
那我就成了破坏她婚姻的千古罪人
then I'm the asshole that broke up her marriage, right?
如果我不告诉她 那我也赢不了 对吧
And if I don't say anything, I mean... I can't win, right?
她是个贱♥人♥
She is a bitch,
但她也是我姐姐
but she's also my sister.
真是他妈的
Just fuck.
莎姆 你得告诉她
Sam, you gotta tell her.
是啊
Yeah...
如果是你 你会想知道吗
Would you wanna know if it was you?
会
Yes.
知道吗
You know what?
不如你吃点这个 增添力量吧
Why don't you try this for strength?
你是刚从裤子里拿出来的吗
You just pulled that out of your pants?
别担心
Don't worry about it.
椒盐卷饼热狗吗
A Pretzel Schmetzel dog?
你知道这玩意整天躺在柜台里
You know that these just lay around on the counter all day
所属的温度还很容易腐坏
in the temperature danger zone.
你说的有道理 但我想告诉你
Alright, you have a good point, but I wanna tell you
这些不受食物科学的法则限制
these defy the laws of food science.
有时 你得为了好吃而冒险
And sometimes, you gotta roll the dice for flavor.
吃吧
Go ahead!
我知道闻起来有点怪味
I know it smells a little funny,
-但肯定会让你感觉良好 -不
- but it's gonna make you feel great. - No.
-闻着好香 -那好 赶紧吃
- It smells delicious. - Alright, well, get in there.
我现在才不要把这东西塞进嘴里
I'm not putting this in my mouth right now.
就像你朋友的姐姐或是姐姐的朋友
Just like your friend's sister or your sister's friend.
我其实没太听明白 要素过多
I wasn't totally following. There's just so much going on.
谢谢你听我唠叨 弗雷德
Thanks for listening, Fred.
其实我也别无选择
I really didn't have a choice.
好了 来吧来吧
Okay, okay. Come on, come on, come on, come on.
我们可以的 我们只需要回到家
We can do this. We just gotta get home.
对 我知道
Yeah, I know, I know.
不不不
No, no, no, no, no.
我知道这表情 拜托你别再座位上拉了
I know that face. Please don't do it on the seat again
因为上次用了好多纸巾
'cause that took so many paper towels.
你能憋住 等我们到家吗
Can't you just hold it until we get home?
龙♥卷♥风♥就要来了
It's a freaking tornado watch.
好吧 是什么 要尿尿还是粑粑
Okay, what is it, teetee or papaw?
抱歉我迟到了 我本打算发信息的 后来没发
Sorry, I'm late. I was gonna text, and then I didn't.
没事 我已经干了很多活
Oh, no, no worries. I've actually gotten a ton done.
而且我这不是消极攻击法
I'm not even saying that passive-aggressively either.
最近一直顺风顺水 我修好了收割机的漏水
Been on a roll. I fixed that leak on the combine.
对
Yup!
现在我想把这里收拾干净
And now, I'm just getting all this cleared out.
那个什么在哪
So, where there's--
行吧 老妈
Alright, Mom.
更多藏着的宝贝
More hidden treasures.
-我们都可以开酒吧了 对吧 -是啊
- We could open a bar, huh? - I know, right?
也许在老妈回来前 我们应该来个
You know, we should probably do a clean sweep of the house
彻底的大扫除
before she gets back.
好主意
Yeah, good idea.
我觉得疯狂购物日很不错
I thought Crazy Dayz was pretty cool.
-我觉得你办得很成功 -谢了
- I-I thought you did a really good job. - Thanks.
瑞克还帮了不少忙
You know, Rick was actually really helpful, which...
我一直对他不太好 我该更温柔点
I've not been very nice to him. Have to be nicer.
-真的 -不 你不用 你对他太好了
- Honestly. - No, you don't. You're too nice to that guy.
我从没想过自己能
That's something I literally never thought
听你说这句话
I'd hear you say.
怎么 出什么事了
What? What's wrong?
等等
Hold on.
是珊侬
Oh, it's Shannon.
-老天 -你还好吗 我去关门
- God. - Are you okay? I'll close the door.
关门 把门关上
Shut the door! Just shut the doors!
好了 来吧
Okay. Go ahead.
你能赶紧解决内急吗
Can you hurry up your business?
你能赶紧的吗 因为...
Can you do it quick because...
如果这地方不好
Okay, if that spot doesn't work,
那这里呢
how about this one?
在这里尿尿 这是个好地方 对吧
Make a teetee here. This is a good spot right here, huh?
快点 赶紧尿
Go ahead. Make your teetees...
...在那边吗
...over there?
等等 狗子 回来 回来 狗子
Wait, dog! No, come back! Come back, dog!
好 珊侬 好 我不说了 你告诉她
Alright, Shannon. Okay, I'll let you go. Just let her know
任何时候都可以给我打电♥话♥ 好吗
that she can call me anytime she wants to, okay?
好 爱你 拜
Alright. Okay, love you. Alright.
珊侬在她朋友家的地下室很安全
Okay. Well, so Shannon's safe in her friend's basement.
爸在做复健
Dad's at his PT.
不过瑞克不接电♥话♥
Rick is not answering his calls though.
你怎么表现这么奇怪
Why are you being so weird?
你害怕吗
Are you scared? I mean,
你知道这个龙♥卷♥风♥不会击倒这个谷仓
you know this tornado is not gonna hit this barn.