游侠笑传（2015）

在很久很久以前
Way back in days of old
有个传说很新鲜
There was a legend told
英雄大名伽尔凡特
About a hero known as Galavant
飘逸头发方正下巴
Square jaw and perfect hair
一身正气胆量很大
Cojones out to there
世间无人能将他比下
There was no hero quite like Galavant
超越世人的强悍
Tough, plus every other manly value
谁人敢冒死侵犯
Mess with him, he'll disembowel you
他能够统治一切
Yay, he ruled in every way
童话般的英雄情节
A fairy-tale clich
人们都叫他伽尔凡特
And people called him Galavant
他在这儿！
There he is!
这个英雄男人 有个心爱♥女♥人♥
The man we're speaking of, he had a lady love
美丽的少女玛达莲娜
And Madalena, she was one fair maiden
修长美♥腿♥冰雪之肌
Long legs and perfect skin
想入非非诱人胴体
A body built for sin
双峰深沟傲然挺立
With cleavage you could hold a whole parade in
啊 真爱从不过分着迷
Ah, true love was never this ecstatic
也无需疯狂把戏
Nor as wildly acrobatic
彼此相爱如此放肆
Yes, he loved her to excess
情迷席边每天三次
Thrice daily, more or less
而她羞涩尖叫
And she'd be screaming
伽尔凡特
Galavant!
-还有一个小问题 -看
One tiny problem -Look
很快就到来
Soon would arise
邻国君王理查德 财富地位一手遮
Richard, a nearby king of wealth and stature
满眼欲求 紧盯玛达莲娜
He watched Madalena, lust in his eyes
他躬身伸手请求垂青
And he asked her for her hand
但是面色威严更像命令
Well, more like a demand
然后下令侍从将她掳去
Well, more like had his henchmen snatch her
不 伽尔凡特 救命
No! Galavant, help!
今日展现我们面前一场隆重皇室欢宴
Which brings us to today The royal wedding day
只有伽尔凡特能阻止一切
No one can stop it now but Galavant
玛达莲娜这小可怜 苦苦等待大门后面
Poor Madalena waits behind King Richard's gates
企盼心爱的他出现眼前
For the arrival of her Galavant
真正冒险终要上演
Now, at last begins our true adventure
疯狂野性乐趣多变
Epic, wild, a real butt-clencher!
欢呼鼓舞齐声吼
So, huzzah and tally ho!
坐好扶稳这就走
Sit back and here we go
与伽尔凡特一起冒险
Attend the tale of Galava-a-a-a-nt!
一切都好吗 未来的王后殿下
Is everything all right... My Princess?
很好 陛下
Yes, My King.
我早该这样想了
I should think so.
过些日子我们就结婚
In a few moments, we shall marry,
你会立刻成为这片土地上
and you will instantly become the richest,
这最富有 最有权势的女人
most powerful woman in the land.
是的 陛下 我好激动
Yes, My King. Very exciting.
然后 今晚
And then... tonight...
你会和我一起躺在床上
You will join me in my bed.
遵命 陛下
Yes, My King.
我们要做那件事了
We're going to do it!
是
Yes.
我们不单单只坐在床上拆礼物
We're not going to just sit in bed and open gifts
然后讨论婚礼有多好玩 对吗
and talk about how much fun the wedding was, okay?
我们会做那件事的
We're... doing... it.
当然
Yep.
我的女王大人
My lady.
我的意思是 当然啦 我们会拆一些礼物
I mean, of course, we're going to open some presents,
-但是接下来我们就要做那件事 -懂了
- but then we're going to do it. - Got it.
啊
Ohh!
噢
Ugh!
啊 啊
Ohh! Aah!
啊哈
Aah!
天上星星齐作证 我必救出心上人
By all the stars above, I'll save my one true love
看那 哇哦 是他
Hey, look! Oh, wow! It's him!
是伽尔
It's gala...
我无惧万人阻挡 只要爱人回身旁
I shall not be denied until she's by my side
我建议躺下来
I suggest you fall.
多谢
Thanks!
所以 在这个荣耀的日子
And so, on this glorious day,
我们庆祝我们最伟大的国王喜结连理
we celebrate the union of our greatest king!
抱歉打断一下
So sorry to interrupt.
我的爱人
My lady.
好吧 好吧 等一下
All right, all right. Hold on.
当然 加雷斯和我战斗个天昏地暗最后也会是平手
Now, Gareth and I could surely fight all night to an even draw,
假如你想这样的话
if that's what you want.
黑尔 你也可以派出所有帮手来帮忙
Hell, you can even send all your men to help him,
如果你想的话
if you so desire.
但我会把他们都打趴下
But I'll fend them all off.
因为事情是这样的
'Cause here's the thing.
我爱她 理查德
I love her, Richard.
我早上起床想的第一件事就是她
She's the first thing I think of in the morning
入睡前想的最后一件事还是她
and the last thing I think of in the eve.
虽然你可以给她高贵的名声
And you can offer her great fame,
给她巨额的财富
and you can offer her great fortune,
可是
but...
只有我可以给她
Only I can offer her
伟大的爱
great love.
而她会选择我的爱
And that is what she chooses.
其实
Actually...
啥
Hmm?
我不知道 我一直在想
I don't know. I've been thinking
自从被他绑♥架♥之后 我就一直在想这事儿
a lot about it ever since he kidnapped me, and...
我还是选择我的名声和财富
I'm gonna go with the fame and fortune.
-好棒 -感觉这样生活会更轻松些 你知道的
- Yes! - Seems like an easier life, you know?
噢 真抱歉 伽尔 希望我们还能做朋友
Oh, I'm really sorry, Gal. I hope we can be friends.
嗯
Mm.
-稍等一下 亲爱的 嗯
- Hold that thought, darling. - Mm.
晚安 亲爱的王子
Good night, sweet prince.
噢
Oh.
去他的 加雷斯
Damn it, Gareth.
还是你帮我踹大力点吧
Would you just do that for me, please?
晚安安
Night-night.
一年后
早安 先生
Good morning... sir.
我觉得今天咱们要早起了
I see we're getting an early start this morning.
噢 你想干嘛 席德
Oh, what do you want, Sid?
先生 你雇我当你的随从这件事
Sir... when you hired me to be your squire,
是有史以来最令人兴奋的事儿
it was the most exciting thing to ever happen to me.
-嗯 -这片土地上最好的差事
- Mm. - Best squireship in the land.
我爹妈完全醉了
My parents completely plotzed.
但自从玛达莱娜来了之后
But ever since Madalena...
-别提她的名字 -好吧
- Don't say her name. - Right.
有人要见你
There's someone here to see you.
她还给你带来了一个机会
She brings with her an opportunity.
我请求你能见她一面
I would beg you to meet with her.
-席德 我谁也不见 -她就在这儿 请允许我介绍
- Sid, I'm not seeing anyone. - And here she is... may I present
伊莎贝拉·玛利亚·露西亚·伊莉莎贝塔公主
the Princess Isabella Maria Lucia "Elisabeeta"...
-贝塔 - 巴伦西亚的贝塔
- "Betta." - ...Betta of Valencia.
好吧 这真绕口
Well, that's a mouthful.
呃
Uh-huh.
伽尔凡特先生
Sir Galavant,
我大老远赶过来寻求你的帮助
I have traveled long and far to seek your favor.
四个月前 我平静的国家巴伦西亚
Four months ago, my peaceful kingdom of Valencia...
不好意思 这什么味儿
I'm sorry. What is that smell?
应该是我的味道
That would be me.
四个月前
Four months ago,
我平静的祖国巴伦西亚
my peaceful kingdom of
溃败于敌国的进攻之下
Valencia fell under attack from a rival land.
我的人♥民♥沦为俘虏
My people were taken captive.
我的家族不是被囚禁就是被杀害