儿童医院（2008）

Childrens Hospital S03E02

Part 2 Dec. 15, 2020, 2:21 p.m.

You must be new. How'd you know?
你肯定是新来的你怎么知道
You weren't wearing your coloring book.
你没带着画册
I'm Cody, but everyone here calls me Mike.
我叫科迪这儿的人都叫我麦克
Why is that?
为什么
I guess because over the course of three years,
我想是因为在三年时间里
I abducted and murdered twelve men named Mike.
我绑♥架♥了十二个叫麦克的人通通撕票
Is... your name Mike?
你叫...麦克吗
No.
不
No.
不
I'm, uh, Gavin. Gavin Macleod.
我叫加文加文·麦克劳德
I got caught jerking off
我在邻居家阁楼上打飞机的时候
in a neighbor's attic, so I murdered them.
被抓了现行我就杀了他们
Yeah, I hear that.
是啊可不是嘛
Attics are super-sexy.
阁楼很销魂
Mike, I'm looking for a kid named Randall Deakon.
麦克我在找个叫兰德尔·迪肯的小孩
Look, Gavin, no one sees Randall.
听着加文没人见过兰德尔
He gets inside your head.
他会进到你脑子里
Makes you do things. Oh, God.
强迫你干这干那天啊
Terrible things. I hear that.
干可怕的事我听说了
Disturbing things.
令人不安的事
Thank you, Easter Bunny!
谢谢复活节兔子
B.P. is dropping.
血压下降了
Shockingly, your rubber-chicken treatment
你的百鸡宴抵挡不住器官彻底衰竭
couldn't prevent complete organ failure.
我惊讶得下巴都掉了
You might as well have just tickled him.
你不妨试试挠他痒痒
Wait a minute.
等一下
That just might...
或许真的可以...
B.P. is up!
血压升上来了
Heart rate is, too. He's totally cured.
心率也正常了他痊愈了
You did it.
你成功了
I did.
我成功了
It's 'cause I cured him the old-fashioned way.
是因为我用了传统的方法
What? I said "Thank you."
什么我说"谢谢你"
It looked like you were mouthing it.
看上去像是扮鬼脸
Yeah, I just did that for effect.
我是为了喜剧效果
I don't know. I thought it was cool.
我也不知道还觉得很酷呢
Oh, yeah. That is cool.
没错是很酷
Who are you?
来者何人
I'm Gavin.
我叫加文
I do bad things in the attic.
我在阁楼干了坏事
How old are you, Gavin? Thirteen.
贵庚啊加文十三了
Well, if you're thirteen, you must know what they call
你如果真十三岁就肯定知道
the Jonas Brother that isn't in the band.
非乐队的乔纳斯兄弟叫什么
The bonus Jonas.
奖金乔纳斯
Miley Cyrus has a tattoo under her left breast.
麦莉·塞勒斯左边咪♥咪♥有个纹身
What does it say? "Just breathe."
纹的什么 "喘气就好"
Not bad.
还不错
Who sang "Night Moves"? Bob Seger.
《夜间行动》谁唱的鲍勃·西格
I mean... Justin Bieber?
我是说...贾斯汀·比伯吗
What's "Night Moves"?
《夜间行动》是什么
Crap.
糟了
Please!
求你了
What's the matter, Gavin?
怎么了加文
You look sick.
你看起来病怏怏的
Maybe you need some medication.
可能得吃药了
Grimace, let's give him my meds.
苦瓜脸给他吃我的药
All of them.
全部
Damn it.
该死
You ready for a little afternoon delight?
准备好吃午后甜点了吗
And by "Delight," I mean I
"甜点"是指在安全浴缸里
cripple-bang you in a tub built for safety.
让我不健全地直捣玉♥穴♥
It's over, Glenn. What?
咱俩完了格伦什么
It was just a sprain. You're gonna be fine.
扭伤而已没两天就好了
So what?
那又怎样
No more making love in cars parked as close as possible to stores?
再也不能把车停到商店零距离爱爱了吗
Glenn, I'm not attracted to whole people.
格伦健全的人对我没有吸引力
You are now gross to me.
现在你在我眼里很恶心
Fine.
好吧
I'll see myself out.
不用送了
No!
别这样
Chief, this is for us.
主任这是为了我们
Quick! Use my vagina as a splint!
快来把我鲜花深处当夹板使
Come on.
不是吧
Where are you, Briggs?
你在哪儿呢布瑞格斯
Briggs.
布瑞格斯
Preparing for evening lockdown.
准备夜间封锁
Briggs! Come on, buddy!
布瑞格斯快点伙计
No!
不
No, Briggs!
不布瑞格斯
Briggs, come on!
布瑞格斯加油
Stop stabbing him!
不许刺他
No, Briggs!
不布瑞格斯
Mike! Run, Gavin!
麦克快跑加文
Mike! Get out of here!
麦克快离开这儿
What are you doing?!
你在做什么
They'll kill you! I'll be fine! Just go!
他们会杀了你的我没事你快走
You can make it, buddy!
你能跑过来的伙计
I need some help here!
这儿需要帮助
We got a patient with multiple stab wounds.
有位病人身上多处刺伤
Prep the O.R.
准备手术室
No!
不
Owen, it's okay.
欧文没事
A friend taught me that.
朋友教我的
Classic Mike.
麦克
Listen, um, I want to thank you.
听着我想谢谢你
You really restored my faith in the healing power of laughter.
你使我重拾对欢笑治愈力的信念
I'm glad.
我很高兴
Thank you.
谢谢
Wh... What are you doing?
你...你在做什么
Oh, my God. I'm so sorry.
天啊真对不起
I thought that's where this was going.
我以为这样比较符合剧情
I'm happily married.
我的婚姻幸福美满
I'm so embarrassed. It's okay. I'm flattered.
我好尴尬没事我很荣幸
Okay, well... Thank you.
好吧...谢谢
You're welcome.
不客气
Blake!
布莱克
Really?
真的吗
I thought you were kidding.
我以为你开玩笑呢
No, no. I'm not kidding.
不我没开玩笑
Okay. Okay. I get it.
好的好的我懂了
I get it, okay?
我懂了好吧
Happily married. Okay.
幸福美满好的
Thank you.
谢谢
Are you stupid for a living?!
你以犯二谋生吗
Damn!
靠
Attention, hospital staff.
全体医务人员请注意
I mean the literal staff,
我指真实的全体人员
like the kind Moses carried.
就像摩西带领的那些人