我为喜剧狂（2006）
30 Rock S06E08
Part 2
June 7, 2022, 4:20 p.m.
我想要每个街角都有警♥察♥
Look,that's not gonna happen. It's just one mugging.
那是不可能的 这只是一次抢劫
Wait a second. Where did you get that suit?
等一下 你从哪儿弄的那身西装?
I'm not embarrassed.
我没什么可丢人的
I get all my outfits at ann taylor loft.
我所有衣服都在Ann Taylor LOFT买♥♥的 (女装品牌)
Their clothes fit my body and my budget.
他们的衣服适合我的身材和消费预算
Exactly,budget. You have no interest in helping me.
没错 预算 你没兴趣帮我
You're one of them. What do you make? Five figures?
你和她们一样 你赚多少钱? 5位数?
40 grand a year.
一年4万
But don't let the woman who's blackmailing me know that.
不过别让勒索我那女的知道
And the police have no interest in helping me either despite the hundreds of dollars I pay every year in taxes.
警方也没兴趣帮我 尽管我每年交好几百美元的税
They think that I'm the enemy.
他们视我为阶级敌人
We have no choice but to take matters into our own hands.
那我们就只能自己动手解决问题了
- I agree! - You do?
- 同意 - 真的?
Oh,no!
不要啊!
no,if I sneeze,I'll do it like the president taught me.
没事 我要打喷嚏的话 就会学总统那样
I'm pregnant with a kitty cat.
我怀了一只小猫咪
Those are my popsicles!
那些冰棍是老娘的!
- Well,hello,sexy. - Hello,paul.
- 我回来啦 美女 - 你回来啦 Paul
I'm wearing an edible nightgown. It's breadstick flavor and it comes with a dipping sauce.
我穿的睡裙是可食用的 面包棍口味 还带蘸酱呢
Oh,you poor thing. You must be so tired.
小可怜儿 你肯定累坏了
Oh,no,no,no,not at all. I have been thinking about this night for a long time.
不不不 一点不累 我期待这一晚很久了
Uhoh,yawns are contagious.
哈欠会传染的
Like all the thal stds my penis is about to give you.
就像我的老二要传给你的性病一样
Okay,well,give me five minutes and then I'll unpack...
让我躺5分钟 然后我就开行李…
拿我在雅加达给你买♥♥的黄暴猴
Whatwhat happened last night?
昨晚发生了什么?
We talked for a while and then we fell asleep.
我们聊了一会儿 然后就睡着了
Without doing anything.
啥也没干
Whow is that possible? We are jenna and paul.
这怎么可能? 我们是Jenna和Paul啊
Did we mix up our days and accidentally both roofie each other?
我们搞错了日期 不小心同时给对方下了迷♥奸♥药?
Or did we just fall asleep?
还是说我们只是睡着了?
What like some boring,normal,sitcom couple?
什么 就像情景剧里演的某些无趣 正常的情侣?
Like,Mr. Brady and tiger the dog?
就像Brady先生和Tiger狗狗? (出自情景喜剧"脱线家族")
Let's just think.
咱们好好想想
We hate normal. Normal is death.
我们讨厌正常 正常就是死亡
But we didn't hate last night.
但我们不讨厌昨晚
So,it must not have been normal.
所以 昨晚一定不正常
Paul,I think we just found another level of sexuality.
Paul 我们似乎找到了更高一层的性♥爱♥境界
It's a whole new fetish called...
这是一种全新的性癖好 叫做…
normalling.
正常向
So last night,I napped on you and you liked it, you sick bitch.
那昨晚我躺在你身上睡觉 你很喜欢 你个下流荡♥妇♥
Oh,yeah.
哦 耶
And I put that afghan all over you because I thought your feet might get chilly.
我用这毛毯盖住你全身 因为我怕你的脚会冷
So chilly.
好冷啊
Oh,I just had the sickest idea.
我有个超下流的想法
We go out as a couple to bed,bath and beyond and shop for home necessities.
我们作为一对情侣 去家居用品店 买♥♥家庭日常用品
In front of everybody.
当着所有人的面
Normalling in public? You delicious whore.
公开正常向? 你个淫♥娃♥
Really,trump? My idea is stupid?
真的么 Trump? 我的主意很蠢?
Well you make your hair every morning by sticking your head in a cotton candy machine.
你每天遭上还用机器把 你的头发弄得跟棉花糖一样呢
What are you guys doing?
你们干嘛呢?
The police can't be counted on to protect the rich unless they're rich too.
不能指望警♥察♥来保护有钱人 除非他们也有钱
So we're gathering support for a private police department where the starting salary is...
所以我们聚集力量 建立私有治安机关 这里的底薪是…
$5 million a year.
每年500万美元
- How's that going? - Slowly.
- 进展如何? - 缓慢
Even tommy hilfiger turned me down and you'd think that he, of all people,
连Tommy Hilfiger(设计师)都拒绝了我 你会以为众人之中 他…
would understand the lower classes can ruin something.
还应该会明白底层人♥民♥是会把城市毁掉的
Plaxico burress just called our idea "poorly thought out".
Plaxico Burress(美式足球员)说我们的点子 "想得忒烂了"
Then hung up by shooting his own phone.
然后用脚把电♥话♥踢挂了
This is a travesty. The wealthy were once the heart of new york.
太讽刺了 富人一度是纽约的心脏
I just don't understand this city anymore.
我现在都不明白这座城市了
That's funny, because I may have just figured it out.
有趣 因为我好像刚搞懂了她
(西语)我喜欢墨西哥街头音乐!
(西语)这老太婆疯了!
I used to be like you, thinking I could make the city follow my rules.
我以前和你一样 以为能让这城市按我的规则来
I told off line cutters and movie theater talkers.
我以前会谴责插队的人 还有在看电影时讲话的人
And for what?
为了啥?
Did anyone cheer me,or name a sandwich after me that would maybe be turkey,
有谁曾经为我喝彩 或者用我的名字 命名一个里面有
pastrami,swiss,russian dressing,cole slaw and potato chips?
火鸡肉 熏牛肉 瑞士起司 俄♥罗♥斯♥浆汁 卷心菜沙拉还有薯片的三明治吗?
You can't count on anyone else in this city,jack.
你不能依靠这座城市里的任何一个人 Jack
All you can do is sink down into the filth.
你能做的只有沉到肮脏的底部
Or rise above it.
或者我可以升华
If no one will help me,i'll do it myself.
要是没有人要帮我 我就自己来
I'll remind new york of what she once was.
我会让人们想起纽约她曾经的面貌
Yes,a native american paradise!
对 一座美国本土的天堂!
The greatest city on earth.
地球上最伟大的城市
A city that needs a leader who still believes in order and justice.
这座城市需要一个还相信秩序和正义的领导者
Who'll shine a light into all the tunnels and police the police,
一个会照亮所有地下通道和整理所有警♥察♥的人
who'll make this city into a beacon,
一个会把这座城市变成指路明灯人
lighting the way for an entire nation.
为整个国度照亮未来的路
Anyhoo,tracy,in the dog boner sketch.
哈哈 Tracy 在那个狗秀里的段子
I hereby officially announce my candidacy...
我现在正式宣布
For the office of mayor of the city of new york.
我将要参选纽约市长
Vote for jack donaghy.
请投票给Jack Donaghy
Slogan to come.
宣传标语马上推出
you know if we got cloth place mats then we could just throw them in the laundry.
要我们买♥♥布的桌垫的话 可以直接扔到洗衣机里洗
Well,these vinyl ones say dishwasher safe,that's easy.
这些乙烯的还可以放到洗碗机里洗 更方便
Yeah,easy for the person who never does the dishes.
哟 从不洗碗的人还觉得方便
What we're doing is so sick,right?
我们所作所为是很变♥态♥的 对吧?
How many times have you climaxed?
你高♥潮♥了几次?
- Zero. - Me too.
- 一次也没有 - 我也是
Bathroom organizers!
浴室收纳箱!
Good news for your campaign,j.d.
你的竞选活动有好消息了 JD
I got a huge list of voter names.
我得到了一大票选民名单
Do you know anyone who wants to be called daryl weenus?
你认识有人 愿意被取名Daryl Weenus么?
I just registered the domain name for my campaign website
我刚给竞选网站注册了域名
Jackdonaghyisrunning formayor2013 newyorkthisis thewebsite.com.
"JackDonaghy竞选2013年纽约市长 这是竞选网站.com"
That's as close as I could get. Everything else was already pornography.
这是我能找到最好的了 其他都被注册成黄网了
I got everything on your list,Mr. Donaghy
你要的东西都买♥♥齐了 Donaghy先生
,fresh undershirts from vattene,
Vattene的打底衫
18yearold scotch for your bar,and,just for fun,
18年苏格兰威士忌 还有 为博君一笑
I also got you these goofy water balloons my mom's friend ron used to always send me out to buy.
我买♥♥了这种搞笑水气球 我妈的朋友Ron以前老让我帮他买♥♥的
Thank you,kenneth.
谢谢你 Kenneth
I know they're condoms.
我知道那是套子
All right,tracy,let's buckle down.
好 Tracy 我们开始工作吧
Now that I've restocked,we never have to leave this office.
我供给现在充足 再也不用离开这个房♥间了
Hang on... Have you not left this building since you were mugged?
等等… 你被抢之后就再没有离开过这栋楼?
What? Uh,no,I've been very busy.
啥? 没有 我非常忙
What about your daughter?
那你女儿呢?
Liddy is at a baby leadership conference this week. The timing is perfect.
Liddy这周去参加婴儿领导者大会了 时间正好
I know what you're doing.
我懂你的把戏
The first time I got mugged,I didn't leave my room for a week.
我第一次被抢 一周都不敢离开房♥间
I hid,but not in a tuxedo.
我藏起来 不过不是藏在礼服里面
All I had was a chewbacca costume made out of used hair extensions.
我那时只有一套用二手发片做的 星战里的乔巴卡戏服
It made me feel invincible.
它让我觉得自己不可战胜
Like someone who wouldn't get scared and freeze up when they got mugged.
自己绝不可能因为被抢劫就害怕 厌世
Perfectlyexecuted chewbacca sounds!
最佳乔巴卡模拟音效!
That's why you won't take off that tuxedo,
所以你才不愿意脱下礼服
that's why you're running for mayor
所以你才会竞选市长
,and that's why you won't go outside.
所以你才不愿意出去
You're scared.
因为你害怕了
The only thing I'm scared of is what's happening to this city.
我害怕的是这个城市的变化
Then I'm gonna say to you what I say to all my sharks right before they die.
接下来这句话 我对我的鲨鱼们在临终前都说过
Let's go outside.
我们出去吧
Oh,jenna,I have a friend
噢 Jenna 我有个朋友...
Yeah,well I have a million friends.
我有一百万个朋友
I get so many birthday cards it's embarrassing.
我过生收的卡片多到让我尴尬了都
No,I have a "friend" who wants to freak out some new yorkers,
不是 我有个朋友想恶心纽约人
and I know you and paul disgust everyone.
我知道你和Paul让每个人都觉得恶心
Oh,he and I are on a whole new level.
我们现在已经进化到新的阶段了
This morning,paul and I signed up for zipcar.
今天早上我们才加入了 Zipcar车辆共享俱乐部
我为喜剧狂（2006）
30 Rock
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