我为喜剧狂（2006）

30 Rock S06E06

Part 6 June 7, 2022, 4:20 p.m.

I want to have sex with avery's mother.
我想和Avery的妈滚床单
No!You can't do that.
不行你不能这么做
I know.And maybe it's just the loneliness,and the frustration,and stupid valentine's day.
我知道或许是因为孤单因为沮丧还有可恶的情人节
But she's amazing.
但是她超棒的
And come on,didn't our friends the ancient olmecs bed both mother and daughter
还有啊我们的朋友古奥尔麦克人不是也同时睡母女二人
to satisfy their jaguar gods?
来取悦他们的美洲虎神吗?
And everybody loves them.
所有人都爱死他们了
Jack,listen to me.That is wrong on so many levels.
Jack 听我说我都不知道该先吐哪个槽点
You can never sleep with her,never,never,ever,ever...
你千万不能和她滚床单切记切记万万不可...
Never,ever,ever.
切记切记万万不可
Never,ever,ever,ever!
切记切记万万不可!
I get it,lemon.Thank you.
我知道了 Lemon 谢谢
Just hearing your labored breathing while you walk up stairs has purged me of all sexual desire.
就听你这上楼时的大喘气声把我所有蠢蠢欲动的火苗都浇灭了
Yeah,well,glad I could help.
哈好吧很高兴能帮到你
Now,if you'll excuse me,I need to clean up the mess I made here with Criss.
现在请允许我去解决我和Criss之间的麻烦事
You're still here.I tried to call you.
你还在我打过电♥话♥给你
20 missed calls?How did
20个未接来电? 我怎么没...
Right.My ringtone is the sounds of cooking.
哦对我的铃♥声♥是做饭的声音
Which is perfect,because I love cooking.But when I'm cooking
我喜爱烹饪所以铃♥声♥很完美但是因为我正在做饭-
Lemon,please hang up,I can't listen to any more of this.
Lemon 快把电♥话♥挂了我不想再听下去了
Oh,yeah.
哦好
Look...I was planning on saying "it was my fault,"
我本来是想说都是我不好
and,"please,let's get back together.
还有求你我们还是和好吧
" But,it doesn't look like I need to.
但是看起来我好像不用说了
What do you mean,"get back together"?
你说和好是什么意思?
You thought we broke up because of that fight?
你以为我们吵了一架就算分手了?
No,that would be idiotic.You wanted a table,I wasn't superhelpful.Who cares?
不是的那样就太傻了你想买♥♥个桌子我没帮上忙谁会在乎这个啊?
I tend to care,you know I let little things ruin stuff.
我会在乎你知道我会纠结于鸡毛蒜皮的小事
I mean,I stopped shopping at kmart
比如说我再也不去Kmart买♥♥东西了
because I found out that kathy ireland didn't design any of her signature socks.
因为我发现Kathy Ireland并没有自己设计她的招牌袜子
- But maybe,after 40 years - 41.
- 但是也许在四十年后 - 四十一年
- I can change. - Eh,don't bother.
- 我会有所改变 - 额算了吧
You can get mad at dumb stuff.That's your thing.I'll get over it.That's my thing.
你为了小事抓狂那是你的特点我很快忘到脑后去这是我的特点
It's kind of perfect.
这不是挺好的吗
But how are we ever going to break up?
那我们怎样才能分手呢?
I don't know,maybe we never will.
我不知道或许就再也不分手了
Maybe we'll still be celebrating valentine's together 100 years from now.
或许一百年后我们还在一起庆祝情人节
Do you think our ape overlords will let us?
你觉得我们的人猿陛下会允许我们庆祝吗?
Oh,they'll let you and me do whatever we want,
哦他们会让我和你做任何想做的事情的
because we'll be spying on the rest of humanity for the ape police.
因为他们会让我们刺探人猿警♥察♥残存的人性的
- Wait,where did you get a table? - I made it.
- 等一下你从哪儿搞到这张桌子的? - 我自己做的
I gathered fallen tree branches from riverside park.
我从河畔公园捡了些掉落的树枝
- That's where we first met. - Yeah.
- 我们就是在那里初识的 - 是啊
And the top is a herman cain poster I found in a dumpster.
桌面是一张从垃圾堆里捡来的 Herman Cain的宣传板
Excuse me.I have a package for liz lemon.
打扰了有一个Liz Lemon的包裹
Oh,sure,come in.
哦好快进来
you're the head writer of tgs?
你是TGS的首席编剧?
but you're so beautiful.
但是你这么漂亮啊
- Charlie what now? - I love your brown hair.
- 我没听错吧? - 我喜欢你的棕发
It's so bouncy,like the "after" picture in a lice ad.
好有弹性哦就像去虱广♥告♥里用后效果的样子
Thank you.It's from intermittent washing.
谢谢是反复洗才洗出来的
- And you own this place? - Yeah.
- 你是这里的房♥主? - 是啊
Holy moly,there's stairs?
额的神啊还有楼上呢?
And a dining room table?
还有个餐桌?
Is this your boyfriend?
这是你男朋友?
Yeah.He made me dinner.
是啊他给我做了晚餐
Mashed potatoes in a martini glass.
装在马天尼酒杯里的土豆泥
Who are you,the president?Of france?
你到底是谁啊总统啊? 法国总统?
I know,right?
我懂多好
- You are an inspiration,liz lemon. - I am an inspiration.
- 你是我的精神支柱 Liz Lemon - 我是精神支柱啦
I'll see you at work tomorrow.Happy valentine's day.
明天上班见情人节快乐
- You too. - I want your life.
- 你也是 - 我想要你的生活
And I will have it.
而且我会拥有的
I like her.
我挺喜欢她的
45 seconds.
45秒倒数
- Jenna. - This is a nightmare.
- Jenna - 这是一场噩梦
My nemeses,abigail breslin and the woman from those progressive insurance commercials,
我的死对头 Abigail Breslin 还有那个激进的保险广♥告♥里的女人
are in the audience.
都在观众席上
Just,relaxpanic,don't.
放紧张不别紧张
You failed me,pete.
是你害我成这样的 Pete
And when I go down,i'm taking you with me.You'll never work again.
我要是不行了我也要把你拖下水你永远都找不到工作了
But I have five kids.
但是我有五个孩子
And grandkids can't be far behind,little evelyn's so sexual.
或许孙子辈马上也要出来了小Evelyn性早熟啊
30 seconds.
30秒倒数
These shoes hurt,mommy.
这双鞋穿着很疼妈妈
Good.Focus on the pain,not on the fact that
那就好把注意力放在疼痛上不要去想如果你输了
if you lose,i'm gonna pour acid on your barbies.
我就会往你的芭比娃娃上泼硫酸的事实
Okay,come on.
好了走吧
The shoes.The fire.
鞋战火
The sword.
剑
It's the pain.She needs the pain to distract her.
是疼痛感她需要疼痛感来转移注意力
I need to hurt her, but she's all the way over there.
我需要给她挂点彩但是她远在台上
How could I possib--
究竟怎么才...?
Come on, hornberger.
加油 Hornberger
Archer... Arch!
弓箭手...发射!
♪ just you and I ♪
♪ sharing our love together ♪
♪ and I know in time ♪
美国小屁孩演唱比赛决赛现场直播
♪ we'll build the dreams we treasure ♪
is she bleeding?It looks like an arrow wound.
她是在流血吗看上去是箭伤
Oh,jack.I didn't know you'd be down here.
哦 Jack 我没想到你会在楼下
Oh,nice place.What did you pay for all this wood?
哦好地方啊你怎么买♥♥得起这些家具?
I don't believe we've met.
我觉得我们没有见过
Jack,this is...
Jack 这是...
Someone I saw fighting with a dog outside a liquor store.
我在烟酒店外见到的一个和狗打架的人
I'm herb.'cause you are what you smoke,right "jackie"?
我叫Herb 因为你的名字就是你抽的烟对吗 Jackie?
Hey,where's the head?
那个茅房♥在哪儿?
We're in mixed company,but let's just say I've got to go wreck your toilet.
我们是混住的所以我恐怕要空袭你的厕所了
It's down that hallway on the righthand side.
在走廊下去往右拐
Diana,don't do this.
Diana 别这么做
- I'm lonely,jack. - So am i.
- 我很孤单 Jack - 我也是
Believe me,I know how you feel.Being alone on valentine's day,
相信我我知道你的感觉在情人节伶仃一人
frustrated in all kinds of ways.
不管从哪方面讲都很有挫败感
Just wanting a connection,to hold someone's hand.
只想萍水相逢握住一个人的手
Ideally when she's wearing only a necktie.
最好她身上只著一条领带
But you deserve better than herb.
但是你应该找一个比Herb好的人
Why is this bathroom full of wine bottles?
为什么这个卫生间里全是酒瓶子呢?
But what I deserve,I shouldn't have.
我应得的人我却无法拥有
Me neither.
我也是
So,what are we going to do about it?
那么我们该怎么办呢?
Oh,baby.Oh,yes.Yes!
哦宝贝 Yes! Yes!
- Oh,that's good. - Oh,yes.
- 哦太爽了 - 再来
- Oh,yeah,don't stop. - Oh,just like that.
- 哦亚美碟 - 哦就这样
- Oh,yeah,but a little lower. - Yes!
- 嗯再低一点 - Yes!
- Yeah,baby! - Oh,yeah!
- 啊啊啊宝贝! - 啊啊啊!
- Nope,nope. - Let me have one.
- 不行不行 - 让我吃一个
Give it to him,frank.Give it to him,we're friends.
给他一个 Frank 给他一个吧我们是朋友
You can have one of mine.
你吃个我的吧

NBC宇宙台
♪ and I remember our first embrace ♪
♪ that smile that was on your face ♪
♪ promises that we made ♪
♪ we made it you and I ♪
Finally, I can say, happy valen Ow!
终于我可以说情人节快- 喔!
My legs!
我的腿!
This get me out of sex.
这样我就不用爱爱了吧
Oh,my god,liz.We're wearing the exact same lipstick.
哦天啊 Liz 我们用一样的口红
Looks better on you,of course.
但是你涂上明显比较好看
I wish I could just cut those lips right off and wear them.
我多希望我能割下你的双唇安在我的嘴上
Happy valentine's day,lovers.
情人节快乐情人们
Happy valentine's day to us all.
祝所有人情人节快乐