关于哈利的那些事（2020）

Okay, we're just friends, man.
别计较了 真的
Like, let it go. For real.
真的不计较了
For real for real?
真的
For real.
第一轮斯塔西娅请客
First round's on Stasia!
庆祝我分手了
To celebrate my breakup.
斯塔西娅
Stasia.
谢谢
Thank you.
看到了没 这就叫礼貌
See? Courteous.
敬萨姆分手
To Sam's breakup.
敬萨姆分手
To Sam's breakup.
《If We Never Met》——John K/Sigala
*如果我们从未遇见*
*If we never met*
*我会喝醉后在别人床上醒来*
*I'd be drunk, waking up in someone else's bed*
*我会迷失在假朋友拥挤的房♥间*
*I'd be lost in a crowded room of fake friends*
*我甚至不会知道什么是爱*
*I wouldn't even know what love is*
*如果我们从未遇见*
*If we never met*
女人的人生价值
就在于入主白宫
谢谢你 哈利
Thanks, Harry.
*如果我从未开始唱歌♥*
*What if I never started singing?*
*如果你从未*
*What if you never*
*告诉家人你离家出走会怎样*
*Told your family you were leaving?*
*当你感到压力巨大时*
*When you felt the pressure*
*有一百万种原因*
*There's a million different reasons...*
卡戴珊家族的
Okay, one of the daughters
一个女儿
of... of the Kardashians.
但是姓不一样
But they don't have the same last name!
卡戴珊的一个女儿
There's a Kardashian daughter
但是姓不
with a different...
*宝贝 当我闭上眼*
*And baby, when I close my eyes*
*我在想*
*I'm thinkin' about*
*如果我们从未遇见*
*If we never met...*
世界上最好的豆子
best beans in the world.
*我会喝醉后在别人床上醒来*
*I'd be drunk, waking up in someone else's bed*
芝加哥市长竞选结果
获胜者 麦迪·麦克梅纳明
*我会迷失在假朋友拥挤的房♥间*
*I'd be lost in a crowded room of fake friends*
*我甚至不知道什么是爱*
*I wouldn't even know what love is...*
哈利 别扔了
Harry, stop it.
生够闷气了 走吧
All right, enough pouting, let's go.
哥们 你认真的吗
All right, dude, are you serious?
别数了 都放那
Okay, no, leave it.
都当做小费吧 走了
Leave it as a tip. Come on.
扔在那就好
Just drop it. Yep.
-谢谢 -走吧
‐ Thank you. ‐ Let's go.
这就是那个胖女人唱歌♥的原因
So that's why the fat lady sings.
-我没听明白 -因为她
‐ I don't get it. ‐ It's because she's...
因为她无性不欢啊
Because she's happy about all the sex.
-多好笑啊 -好吧 明白了
‐ That's good! ‐ Okay. Yeah, yeah, got it.
等等 别动
Oh wait, hold on.
眼睫毛掉了
Eyelash.
许个愿吧
Make a wish.
*如果我们从未遇见*
*If we never met...*
我要去尿尿
I gotta pee.
爱与平等都是人♥权♥
*我会迷失在假朋友拥挤的房♥间*
*I'd be lost in a crowded room of fake friends...*
非常感谢你们今天来同志骄傲日帮忙
Hey, thanks for helping out at Pride today.
你们很厉害
You were great.
好多选民都签名了
We got a lot of voters signed up.
没人能拒绝萨姆 对吧
Oh yeah, you can't say no to Sam, right?
说到萨姆
Speaking of Sam,
你们俩是那什么吗
are you guys like a thing?
是 一对吗
Like, a, a couple?
-我和萨姆 -对
‐ Me and Sam? ‐ Yeah.
不 不 我们只是朋友 只是
Uh... no, no, we're just friends, but...
那就好 你知不知道他有没有在跟人约会
Okay, cool, would you happen to know if he's seeing anybody?
萨姆有没有在跟人约会
Uh, if Sam is seeing anyone?
没有 他没跟谁在约会
Uh, no. He's, he's not.
我只是想在约他之前
You know, I just wanted to make sure
先确认下
before I ask him out.
对 你确实应该如此
Yeah, uh, I mean, you should definitely do that.
但是你应该知道他
But you should know that he's...
他很直的
he's pretty much straight.
好耶
Here we go!
他很直
He's s‐straight?
真的
Really?
没看出来啊
Wow, did not see that coming.
《Let Me Take You There》——Max Styler/Laura White
*人人都需要厮守之人*
*Everybody needs somebody*
*我们都难以独活*
*We can't make it on our own*
*很晚才在派对上露面*
*Turnin' up late at the party*
*迟迟不肯回家*
*Ain't goin' home*
*让我带着你去*
*Let me take you there*
*让我带着你去*
*Let me take you there*
萨姆 我们去再喝一杯 好吗
Hey, Sam, let's go have another drink, all right?
我觉得我喝不了了
I don't think I can.
我要瘫倒了
I am o‐blitch‐erated.
我们再去喝一杯
We're gonna get another drink, all right.
去吧 婊贝们
Get it, bitches! Whoo!
*来吧 欢度今宵*
*Oh, come on, stay the night, yeah*
*欢度今宵*
*Stay the night, yeah*
两杯龙舌兰 两杯啤酒
Hey, two, two tequila shots and a couple beers.
还喝 哈利 别吧
Shots? Harry, no!
骄傲日快乐
喝到底[受雄起]
Bottoms up.
攻也雄起 别歧视攻
Tops, too! Don't be bottomist.
骄傲日快乐 芝加哥
Happy Pride, Chicago!
大家今晚感觉如何
How is everybody feeling tonight?
你们感受到爱了吗
Can you feel the love?
因为这是一切的一切 对吗 爱
'Cause that's what it's all about, right? Love.
人人都想得到 人人都需要
Everybody wants it. Everybody needs it.
我们干嘛不去播撒爱呢
So why aren't we giving it away?
你们在等什么
What are you waiting for?
今晚来寻找爱吧
Find you some love tonight.
或者至少上个床
Or at least get you some ass.
怎么
What?
你那番话是认真的吗
S-so did you mean that thing you said?
关于基佬成了朋友
About how when guys become friends,
就再没法发展更亲密的关系
they can never be anything more than that?
千真万确
One billion percent.
要么以糟糕的性生活结束
You either end up having bad sex
要么以友情的断送告终 或者两者皆有
or ruining the friendship, or both.
没有例外吗
And there's no exceptions?
一个都没有
Like, ever?
没有 一个都没有
None. Zero.
即便
No even for...
咱俩也不可能吗
you and me?
即便咱俩也不可能
Not even you and me.
难道我要和一个换伴侣换得
Like I'm going to date the guy who bails on relationship
比我家狗吃猫屎的速度还快的人约会吗
faster than my parents' dog eats cat poop.
我的天 我好爱这首歌♥
Oh my God, I love this song!
《Kiss My Lips》——Cherie Lily
*我想要你*
*I want you*
*宝贝 做我的人*
*Baby, be mine*
*你愿做我的人吗*
*Won't you be mine?*
*你愿做我的人吗*
*Won't you be mine?*
*想要你做我的人 小伙*
*Wanna make you mine, boy*
*告诉我该怎么办*
*Tell me now what can I do...*
我去找我朋友了
I'm gonna go find my friends!
骄傲日快乐
Happy Pride!
*我该怎么办 我该怎么办*
*What can I do? What can I do?*
*我该怎么让你成为我的爱人*
*What can I do to make you my lover?*
*我该怎么办 我该怎么办*
*What can I do? What can I do?*
该死 斯塔西娅
Damn, Stasia,