关于哈利的那些事（2020）

I gotta go.
斯塔西娅：有时间聊聊吗
你回来了
You're home?
怎么样
How was it?
-不适合我 -为什么
- Not for me. - Why not?
就是不适合
Just wasn't.
你对每一个人都能挑出错
You keep finding problems with everyone.
总不能没一个人适合你吧
They can't all be the wrong guy.
他怎么了 体臭 戴假发
What was he? Stinky? Wiggy?
不喜欢单一配偶制
Non- monogamy- y?
都不是
No.
哈利[音同hairy]
Harry.
毛发超级旺盛
Like, super hairy?
-不是 -到处都是毛
- Uhh... - Like, fuzzy all over?
我曾经和一个长毛大怪兽约过会
You know, I used to date this total sasquatch.
感觉很好 我从来不用盖毯子
Loved it. Never needed a blanket.
没有 他很好
No. He was great.
聪明 有趣 帅气
Smart, funny, handsome.
毛发适中
Moderately hirsute.
所以呢
So?
他的名字是哈利
His name was Harry.
懂了
Oh.
他不是你的哈利 对吧
He wasn't your Harry, huh?
孩子
Oh baby.
很显然 现在是一月
Obviously, it's January.
对于拉选票来说太冷了
It's too cold for canvassing.
但是我们到三月
But we've got training events
每周末都有训练活动
every weekend from now until March,
那时候我们就可以走上街头了
when we should be able to start hitting the streets.
所以 情况不错
So, we're in a good place.
我给你们拿最终的志愿者人数
I'll get you the final volunteer numbers.
一年后
谢谢大家
Thanks, guys.
你好
Hi.
我要结婚了
So I'm getting married.
你
You...
你要
You're...
我的天哪 恭喜你
Oh my God! Congratulations!
你看
Look...
我知道过去一年我们没怎么联♥系♥
I know we haven't been exactly close the last year.
天哪 已经一年多了
God, what's it been, like a year and a half?
是的
Well, yeah.
我知道吗 这不重要
You know what? It doesn't matter. Anyway..
我想说的是
the thing is...
我并没有很多喜欢的人
I don't really like a lot of people...
除了你
except you...
还有我的未婚夫 我猜
well, and my fiance, I guess.
所以
And...
我无法想象 你不在
I just can't imagine getting married
我的婚礼上
without you there.
你从我们大学第一天起
I mean, you've been my
就是我最好的朋友
best friend since the first day of college,
我
and I just...
你有没有可能来做我的男伴娘
Is there any chance you'd be my Man of Honor?
"男伴娘"
"Man of Honor"?
有这东西吗
Is that even a thing?
我说有就有了
It is if I say it is.
哈利同意吗
Is Harry cool with it?
我是说
I mean...
我觉得他同意 但是
I assume so, but...
你不先问问他吗
Well, don't you think you should ask him?
我为什么要问他
Why would... why would I do that?
因为他是新郎
Because he's the groom?
不是的
Oh no.
不不不 我不是
No, no, no, I'm not...
我不是要嫁给哈利
No, I'm not... I'm not marrying Harry.
我要嫁给扎克
I'm marrying Zach.
你 你要
You... you're...
扎克
Zach?
你不知道吗
You didn't know?
不 不 不知道
No! No! No!
我我 我社交软件都
I mean, I stopped following you guys
取关你们了 而且我...
on social media, and then I...
我就说我和哈利分手后
I kinda wondered why you never got back to me
给你发信息 你也不回复我
when I texted you after Harry and me broke up.
你没说是要讲这件事啊
You didn't say that it was about that.
而且 而且 你知道我...
And then, and then, you know, I was a little...
觉得早午餐那天我那样有点丢脸 但是
embarrassed about the way that I acted at brunch, but--
我的天哪 真的抱歉
Oh my God, I'm sorry.
我没收到你消息时
And when I didn't hear from you.
我以为你也不想我打扰你
I, I figured you didn't wanna hear from me,
-所以... -我
- So... - I--
我的天 我也很抱歉
Oh my God! I am sorry too.
不过后来这事儿发生了
But then this happened,
我就觉得总得有人先迈出一步 所以
and I figured somebody had to make the first move. So...
我和哈利能在一起这么久唯一的原因
The only reason Harry and I lasted as long as we did
就是我们都觉得自己对你...
is because we both felt so...
干的不叫人事儿
shitty about what we did to you
就是...
that we kind of...
我们一定要在一起
had to make it work, you know.
而且在你早午餐说了那些话之后
Well, that and we did really want to prove you wrong
我们又迫切地想证明你错了 但
after all that nasty stuff you said at brunch, but
最主要的是 我们以为
mostly, we felt like...
如果为此搞砸了和你的友谊
if we ruined our friendships with you...
那一定是爱情
it had to be love.
但... 其实不是
Only... it wasn't.
我也终于意识到
And I finally realized
每次去他们公♥寓♥的时候
that every time I was going over to their apartment,
我希望给我开门的那个人其实是...
the person I was hoping would open the door was...
扎克
Zach.
我试图过抗拒这种感觉 真的
And I tried to fight it. I mean, I really did.
扎克太直男太普通
Zach is so straight and average.
你懂我什么感受吧
You know how I feel about that.
我也不知道
I don't know.
我就是...
I just...
我就是很爱他
I just love him so much.
这种吸引力简直
And the gravitational pull of that is
打败了我以前的自我认知
so much greater than any ideas
和我的人生观
I had about myself or my life.
那...
So...
你意下如何
what do you think?
哈利会去吗
Will Harry be there?
不 不会 他真的很气我们
Oh no. No, he's, like, really mad at us.
好
Yes.
好 我很乐意去
Yeah, I would be honored.
什么时候
When is it?
情人节那天
Valentine's Day.
是不是很恶俗
Isn't that gross?
因为扎克的父母就是情人节结的婚
But Zach's parents got married on Valentine's Day,
这对他很有意义 所以...
and it was important to him, so...
不过别担心 好吧
But don't worry, okay.
我们不会搞什么晚宴彩排啊
We're not doing a rehearsal dinner
单身汉派对啊
or bachelorette party
或者新娘送礼会之类的
or shower or anything like that.
当晚就只有个
Just a simple party
小聚会
that night.
你美呆了
You look amazing.
你喜欢吗
You like?
颠覆传统 像我一样
A twist on the traditional. Like me!
我超喜欢
I love it.
你来了我真的很高兴
I'm so happy you're here.
你说他不会来的