关于哈利的那些事（2020）

And because we've gone way over time,
所以我们得速战速决
we're gonna sudden death this mother!
一题分胜负
One question for the win.
题目范围是
And the category is...
美术史
Art History.
好的 这位画家的一幅十分具有争议的
Okay. This artist's scandalous painting
女性绘画在1884年于巴黎展出时
of a woman nearly derailed his career
差点毁了他的绘画生涯
when it was exhibited in Paris in 1884.
土鲁斯·劳特累克
Toulouse Lautrec!
很抱歉不是噢
Good guess! Afraid not!
五号♥队 你们有30秒时间给我正确答案
Team Five, you have 30 seconds to give me the right answer
要么你们赢 要么我们再来一题
for the win, or we go again.
是马蒂斯 马蒂斯
It's Matisse. It's Matisse.
不 不对
Mmm, no, it's not.
是萨金特
It's Sargent.
我就是干这一行的
This is my business.
是马蒂斯
It's Matisse.
这是他为他妻子作的画
It's a painting he did of his wife.
我跟你讲 应该是约翰·辛格·萨金特
I'm telling you, it's John Singer Sargent.
-《X夫人肖像》 -还剩20秒
‐ Madame X. ‐ Twenty seconds.
你怎么知道的
How the hell do you know that?
他还画了一堆裸体的男人
He also did a bunch of drawings of naked dudes.
我从图书馆里偷了一本关于他的书
I stole a book about him from the library
这样我就可以打手冲了
so I could whack off to it.
有时候我冲完之后
And sometimes after I was finished,
我会认真读一读
I would, you know, read it.
好吧 我们还是听保罗叔叔的吧
Okay, I say we go with Uncle Paul.
-不行 -哈利才是对的
- Yeah. ‐ Uh, no way. Harry's right.
他老是手冲
He whacks off a lot.
-十秒 -我同意哈利
- Ten seconds. ‐ I vote Harry.
行 萨姆
Okay, um, Sam,
你投决定票
you get the deciding vote.
呃
Wh... uh!
萨姆 你现在认真的吗
Sam, are you serious right now?
你真的觉得 就他那样
You really think that this pair of shoulders
知道的美术史
knows more about art history
比我多吗
than I do!
快
Come on.
哈利 我投哈利
Harry! I say we go with Harry!
约翰·辛格·萨金特
John Singer Sargent!
正确
That is correct.
恭喜
Congratulations.
五号♥队赢啦
Team Five's the winner.
我
Ah! I...
恭喜大家
Congrats, everyone.
萨姆 走吧
Sam, let's go.
其实 我想要留下来
Actually, I think I'm gonna stay.
你知道吗
You know what?
你还是个孩子
You are a child!
拜拜
Goodbye.
我妈一直不喜欢他
My mother never liked him, anyway.
"你还是个孩子"
"You are a child!"
-他不是英国人 -确定吗
- He's not British. ‐ Are you sure?
他护照上写的啥
What's it say on his passport?
桀骜
Pretentious?
有那个国家吗
Is that a nationality?
抱歉 我不是故意
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...
-我知道你喜欢他 -不
‐I know you liked him. ‐No,
不完全是 我只是
not really, I just...
得过且过吧
You know, you get what you settle for.
你知道我什么意思吧
You know what I mean?
而且他的公♥寓♥超棒
Plus his apartment was sick!
-是吗 -是啊
- Was it? ‐ Yeah.
你们先占个位子吧
Anyway, you guys get a table,
-我去跟斯坦西娅打个招呼 -我知道了 很好
‐I'm gonna say hi to Stasia. ‐I know. Great.
哇哦 这是谁来了
Well, well, well, look who the hell it is.
简直是个惊喜啊
This is a surprise.
自从你和保罗交往之后你就没来过这里了
You haven't been here once since you started dating Paul.
是啊
Yeah.
除了那次
Well, except that one time,
他在浴室对肥皂有过敏反应
he had an allergic reaction to the soap in the bathroom
你不得不走
and you had to leave.
是啊
Yeah.
他今天怎么没有大驾光临呢
Where is His Royal Highness?
我觉得
I think...
我们分手了
that we broke up.
真的吗
For real?
真的
For real.
谢天谢地
Oh, thank God!
不好意思 萨明治 我讨厌他
I am sorry, Samwich, I hated him.
-我知道 -他简直糟透了
‐I know! ‐He was literally the worst.
他床上功夫了得
Well, he was great in bed.
是吗
He was?
不是
No.
尼克 你好啊
Hi, Nick!
天哪 他一直在这
Oh my God. He's here all the time.
太贴心了吧
That's so sweet.
那不叫贴心 叫死缠烂打
It's not sweet. It's stalkery.
约会中可不叫死缠烂打
It's not stalkery when you're dating.
我们没在约会 我们只是
We are not dating. We're...
玩玩而已
hanging out.
那你们可是玩了
Well, you've been hanging out
六个月呢
for six months.
你真好笑
You're ridiculous.
天哪 哈利居然在这
Oh my God, Harry's here.
这怎么回事
What is going on?
我们今晚碰见了
We ran into each other tonight.
说来话长 重点是
It's a long story. The main thing is
我意识到我一直犯的错
that I realized my mistake all along
就是认为我们不只可以做朋友
was thinking that we could ever be more than friends.
只要我们维持在
As long as we keep it
朋友区内 我们就没事
in the friend zone, we're good.
他很好玩
He's fun...
还很有趣 他真的很聪明
and funny, and he's actually pretty smart,
由于某种原因 我以前从不知道 但
which for some reason, I never knew, but...
他绝对不是做男朋友的料
he's definitely not boyfriend material.
我需要成熟点的
I need someone grown up.
你懂我的意思吧 而不是哈利
You know what I mean? And that's not Harry.
了解 哈利不适合
Okay, got it. Harry it ain't.
哈利不适合
Harry it ain't.
现在你能做好一个小酒吧女招待的本职工作
Now can you do your job like a good little bar wench
给我拿四瓶啤酒吗
and fetch me four beers.
你对他好着迷
You're so into him.
才没有
I am not.
哥们 你胡说什么呢
Bro, what are you talking about?
哥们 你一直盯着他呢
Dude, you're staring at him.
没有 我是盯着他的方向
No, I was staring in his direction
因为我有段时间没见到斯塔西娅了
because I haven't seen Stasia in a while,
我想跟她打个招呼
and I wanted to wave hello.
这是像你这样的粗人
Which is something a Neanderthal like yourself
永远也不会懂的礼节
would never knew is that that is the courteous thing to do.
对 你 你总是这么有礼貌
Yeah, well, you've, you've always been very courteous.
确实如此
I am.
哥们 可你昨晚还在吃饭时放屁
Dude, you literally farted at the dinner table last night.
那是生理反应
That was a medical condition.
对 你就爱瞎扯
Yeah. You're full of shit.
现在也是 哥们 我太了解你了
Just like you are now, dude. I know you.
扎克 闭上你的狗嘴 否则我就告诉阿普丽尔
Zach, shut your gob before I tell April
今天早上我在你电脑上看到的东西
what I saw on your computer this morning.
什么
What?
我们真的只是朋友 哥们