爸爸的好儿子（2012）

You tell him or I'll tell everybody here.It's up to you.
快点
Come on.
好吧 也没那么糟嘛
Okay. Well, that's not that bad.
什么?你没说实话 你这个该死的骗子!
What? You didn't tell him,you fucking lying piece of shit!
快说 要不我他妈就打扁你!
Get on it now or I'll fucking crush you!
不行啊
No.
洁米 你可以跟我说的
Jame, you can tell me.
我是说 能有多糟呢?
I mean, how bad could it be?
什么?
What?
好吧 她说出来了
Okay, she told him.
什么?
What?
你跟你弟上♥床♥了?
You fuck your brother?
哦 天呐
Oh. my God!
恶心的白人
Fucking white people.
这样说起来我也不算太糟吧 老爸?
I'm not looking so bad now, am I, Dad?
我要先走了
I'm out of here.
妈 是她先勾引我
Mom, she started all this.
我不想的 我还是你的小战士 我...
I didn't want to. I'm still your little soldier, I...
- 卧♥槽♥! - 把那制♥服♥给脱了
- Fuck! - Take that uniform off.
你是在侮辱大家嘛
You're insulting us all.
不不不 你没发现吗?
No, no, no. Don't you see?
现在更好了
It's gonna be even better now.
你是一团糟 我也是
You're a mess, I'm a mess.
来吧 夏葫芦 快过来!
Come on. Doc Shakalu, get your ass up here!
我一定要掺和到里面吗?
I got to be part of this shit?
托德?
Todd?
求你了
Please.
拜托了 亲爱的 托德 我们结婚吧
Come on, baby. Come on, Todd, let's do this.
好吧 好吧
Yeah, yeah.
不!我们不能结婚
No! Let's not do this.
好吗?
Okay?
而且为准确起见
And for the record,
我不叫托德·彼得森
my name's not Todd Peterson.
我叫汉·索罗
It's Han Solo.
是以星球大战里的那个英雄命名的
Named after the man who made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs.
而且我是伯杰家的人 就像我爸一样
And I am a Berger, like my father before me.
我还要告诉在座的所有人
Also, I want to tell everyone here that
我背上有个非常大的新街边男孩的纹身
I've got a pretty huge new Kids on the Block tattoo on my back.
他们的头都歪了 但去你们的 特别好玩儿
The heads are warped,but fuck you guys, it's funny.
的确超级搞笑的
It is fucking hilarious.
还有史蒂?
And Steve?
不是针对你 但是我不干了!
Nothing personal, man, but I quit!
不要啊 拜托 托德 别这样
No, no. Come on, Todd, don't be like that.
我们也不干了
We quit, too.
去你的!
Fuck you!
说的好 汉·索罗
Good call, Han Solo,
因为你的未婚妻也和他搞过
'cause your fiancee banged him, too.
什么?
What?
可我并不知道她和她弟弟的事
I didn't know about the brother thing, though.
我和你一样感到恶心 相信我
I am as sickened as you, believe me.
你知道吗?没关系 史蒂
You know what? It's all right, Steve.
因为什么呢?
'Cause guess what?
东尼和香草冰上了你老妈!
Donny and Vanilla Ice fucked your mom!
香草冰和奶奶上♥床♥了?
Vanilla Ice banged Grandma?
太他妈棒了!
That's fucking awesome!
东尼 小心!
Donny, look out!
跟你妈说实话吧 草泥地
Word to your mother, brotherfucker!
我很抱歉 我知道我不该打女人
I'm sorry.I know I'm not supposed to hit a chick,
但是我得承认 这感觉太棒了!
but I got to tell you, it felt good.
我是说 我再也不会这么做了
I mean, I wouldn't do it again,
但对于这个疯子 这是情有可原的
but with this psycho, you know,it was warranted.
东尼!我要杀了你!
Donny! I'm gonna kill you!
安息吧 贱♥人♥
At ease, bitch.
兄弟 这就对了!做得好!
Dude! That's it! Nice!
不过 等一下
Hang on, though. Hang on.
不要 别打我
No, don't hurt me.
咱俩扯平了
Even Steven.
神父 把牧师领摘了吧
Father, take off the collar.
这就对了 你不是故意的
That's right. You're not meant for this.
- 好吧... - 耶
- Well... - Yeah.
干的漂亮
Nicely done.
好了 走吧
All right, come on.
咱们离开这儿吧 爸爸
Let's get out of here, Dad.
听见了吗 听见了吗
Did you hear that? Did you hear that?
我儿子叫我爸爸了!
My son called me "Dad!"
他叫我爸爸了!
He called me "Dad!"
没错!伯杰父子帮回来了!
That's right!The Berger boys are back, bitches!
咋咧?
Wassup?
咋咧?
Wassup?
咋咧...
Wassup...
别说了
Shut up.
他老板和她弟弟?
His boss and her brother?
听起来像是洛尼·丹吉菲尔德的段子
It sounds like a Rodney Dangerfield joke,
但确实发生在我儿子身上了!
but it actually happened to my boy here!
现在我们得给汉·索罗找个新姑娘
Now we got to find Han Solo one of them new girls.
一个不在乎他钱的姑娘
One that don't care about all that money he make.
不 不
No, no.
对 女版托德·布里奇就再好不过了
Yeah, like a girl version of Todd Bridges would be perfect.
没错
That's right!
女版的我 很好
Female version of me. That's right.
其实这方面不用你们操心了 所以...
Well, you know, I actually might be doing okay in that department, so...
什么?
What's that?
什么情况...什么情况?
What the fuck... What the heck?
托德和布莉 看对了个眼
Todd and Brie, sitting in a tree.
我的蛋蛋 膝盖上垂了个挂
I have balls down to my knee!
- 什么? - 他接上词了!耶!
- What? - He said it! Yeah!
- 东尼! - 怎么了兄弟?
- Donny! - Yeah, buddy?
你是我最好的朋友 我会想你的
You're my best friend. I'm gonna miss you.
知道了 知道了
I know, I know.
但是我有个好消息
But there's good news.
要知道 麦嘉老师三年后就出来了
You know what,Miss McGarricle gets out in three years,
到时我们刚好开始重新生活
so the timing's kind of perfect for us to start our lives together.
爸爸 你就收了我给你的钱吧
Dad, let me just give you the money.
不用 我不会拿的
No. No. I'm not gonna do that.
现在是时候让东尼·伯杰
It's time for Donny Berger to
为他做过的烂事负责了
take responsibility for his screw-ups.
我种下的因 我就得承担后果
I made my bed, now I got to lie in it.
东尼!东尼!你有在看吗?
Donny! Donny! Are you watching?
开电视!快开!
Turn on the TV! Turn it on!
他来了 我们说了一天的胖子 塔比图
There he is, the fat guy we've been talking about all day, Tubby Tuke,
真的在冲刺阶段超过了那些埃塞俄比亚人
actually gaining on the Ethiopians here in the final stretch.
这是我押注的那个胖子吗?
Is this the fat guy I put the money on?
一比八千的比例 你押了二十块
Twenty bucks at 8,000-to-1.
- 十六万? - 十六万?
- A hundred and sixty grand? - A hundred and sixty grand?
快点 你个胖猪 快跑!
Come on, you fat shit, move it!
塔比图快跑!塔比图快跑!
Go, Tubby! Go, Tubby!
跑啊!跑啊!
Keep running! Keep running!
超过埃塞俄比亚人!
Pass those Ethiopians!
超过那些埃塞俄比亚瘦子!
Pass them skinny fucking Ethiopians!
这不科学啊 可是它发生了!
This defies every law of science,but it's happening!
快特么站起来!
Get the fuck up!
快特么站起来!
Get the fuck up!
他站起来了!他站起来了!他站起来了!
He's up! He's up! He's up!
他会重新充满力量!他会重新充满力量的!
That'll replenish him! That'll replenish him!
不!
No!
听听观众们的喊声
Listen to the roar of that crowd.
胖子 胖子
Fat guy! Fat guy!
胖子 胖子
Fat guy! Fat guy!
他能赢吗?
Can he possibly win it?
他要赢了!
He's gonna do it!
塔比图赢了!