抓人游戏

Oh, my God.
你们俩真是蠢蛋 不过我爱你们
You guys are fucking idiots. Both of you. But I love you both.
我要走了 回头见吧 或者不见
I'm gonna go. Maybe I'll see you later. Or not.
-谢丽尔 -去抓杰瑞吧 他活该
- Cheryl... - Go get Jerry. He fucking deserves it.
再见 谢丽尔
Bye, Cheryl.
你想干嘛
What do you want?
被谢丽尔拒绝的时间有的是
There's gonna be plenty of time to get rejected by Cheryl.
6月1号♥12点一过怎么都行
After 12:00 a.m. on June 1st.
你们现在需要关注的是
So what I need you guys to focus on,
我们是一个团体
is the fact that we're a team.
好吗 我们相亲相爱 我们爱这个游戏
Right? We love each other, and we love this.
我们因游戏而快乐 专注于任务 好吗
Let's bask in that. Stay focused on our mission. All right?
我们重新扬鞭启程
Let's get back on this horse and ride.
去抓住那个混♥蛋♥
Let's get this asshole.
卢 你不能参加游戏
Lou, not part of it. Not at all.
握个手
Now, shake.
握个手
Shake!
好了 我们有事要做
All right. Now we got some work to do.
好咧
Got it.
抓住他 亲爱的
Go get him, sweetie.
好了
Okay.
你觉得我们该不该
Hey, do you think we
在动手之前先跟杰瑞聊聊
should talk to Jerry about being an alcoholic
-他酗酒的事情 -不
- before we get into all this? - No.
但现在 我已经将近四年没有碰酒了
But now, I've been clean and sober for almost four years.
多亏了你们和上帝的帮助 阿门
Thanks to all of you and that higher power. Amen?
-阿门 -阿门
- Amen. - Amen.
杰瑞 准备好分享你的故事了吗
Jerry, you about ready to share?
大家给杰瑞掌声鼓励
Come on, y'all, let's give it up for Jerry.
-我叫杰瑞 -你好 杰瑞
- My name is Jerry. - Hi, Jerry.
空气中有一丝大♥麻♥的气味
The slight scent of weed.
奇力 他以为他能趁我不备抓住我
Chilli. He thinks he's caught me off guard.
老天 我要趁他不备抓住他了
Oh, my God! I've caught him off guard.
他从后方冲过来
He rushes in from behind.
笨蛋 我要让他清醒一点
Idiot. I give him a wake-up call.
榛果咖啡 什么人会喝榛果咖啡啊
Hazelnut coffee? What kind of bitch drinks hazelnut?
天啊 奇力 拍我
Holy! Chilli! Hit me!
抓住他
Get him!
我要抓住他 一掌拍在他脸上
I'm going to trap him and tag him in the face,
不过我内心深处很清楚 这不可能
and yet, in my heart of hearts, pretty sure it's not gonna work.
霍吉的正面袭击会失败是因为他没有信心
Hoagie's attempts to face me fail because he lacks confidence.
还有 我可以说
Also, I think it's fair to say,
我非常精通怎么用这些免费甜甜圈
I'm fucking surgical with these complimentary donuts.
这就是为什么纸质新闻业正在消亡
And this is why printjournalism is dying.
没错 这就是我等待已久的时刻
Yes! This is the moment I've been waiting for.
抓住杰瑞的那个人会是我
I'm going to be the one who tags Jerry.
卡拉翰会因为自大的念头而分心
Callahan will become distracted by his own arrogant thoughts,
我会利用这一点
which I will exploit.
胜利是属于我的
This will be my victory,
这很有道理 因为成功的人才能成功
which makes sense because success breeds success...
老天
Oh, God.
为什么双周可以统一表示
How come "Bi-weekly" means
一周两次或者隔周一次呢
both twice a week and every other week?
太迷惑人了吧 都是因为造词的人太懒
That's mad confusing and it's just linguistically lazy.
该死的
Oh, shit!
-我的天 -过分了吧
- Holy shit! - Excessive.
是不是感觉被困住了 杰瑞
Feeling trapped, Jerry?
没有
No.
很好
Nice.
该死的
Holy shit!
不不不
No, no, no!
不不不
No, no, no!
我们抓到你了 杰瑞 你出不去了
We got you, Jerry! You're trapped!
距离婚礼还有五小时 你要是不肯出来我们可以等
Five hours till your wedding! We can wait it out if you can!
该死的 知道我想到什么了吗
Shit. You know what I just realized?
里面有很多圣餐酒和圣饼
There's a lot of sacramental wine and wafers in there.
他可以在里面生存很久
He could survive for quite a while.
不行 他不能喝酒
No, he can't drink.
-对 但又不是真的酒 -是真的
- Yeah, but it's not real wine. - Yes, it is.
只是葡萄汁 不是葡萄酒
It's just grape juice. It's not wine.
我上次不省人事的时候
I mean, I was once so fucked
在我侄女的婴儿床里拉了一泡屎
up that I took a shit in my niece's crib.
两次 问我嫂子就知道
Twice, if you ask my sister-in-law.
那你戒毒成功多久了
So how long you been sober?
不 我没有戒毒 我现在还嗨着呢
Oh, no, I'm not sober. I'm high right now.
我只是来抓我朋友的
I'm just here to tag my friend.
祝你戒酒成功 挺好的
Good luck with the sobriety, man. That's cool. Definitely.
里面安静得可怕
It's awful quiet in there.
你知道他在干什么吗 经典骗术
You know what he's doing? It's a classic ruse.
让我们以为里面有出口
Make them think there's an
制♥造♥他已经逃了的假象 别上当
exit and he already escaped. Not buying it.
我信了 我信他在里面弄了个暗门
I buy it. I bet he has a secret door back there.
冰箱摇身一变成了电梯
Refrigerator turns into an elevator.
什么
What?
然后坐电梯到地下室 到达他的秘密巢穴
Takes the elevator down to the basement. That's his lair.
里面有不同的变装道具 还有很多显示屏
Different outfits, computer screens.
你在说什么
What are you talking about?
-摄像头在监视我们 -他又不是蝙蝠侠
- Cameras watching us. - He's not Batman.
我说了吧 他还在里面
Told you. In there.
写了什么
What's it say?
-食我大屌♥ -食我大屌♥ 还是蛋蛋 屁♥股♥
- "Eat my dick." - "Eat my dick." "Balls." "Ass"?
屁♥股♥
"Butt."
冰淇淋
"Ice cream."
-什么 -什么
- What? - What?
没错 他在嘲笑我 他知道我乳糖不耐
Yeah, he's taunting me. He knows I'm lactose intolerant.
怎么回事 他人呢
What is going on? Where is he?
他在哪里
Where is he?
杰瑞
Jerry?
一小时前我们就该拍完婚纱照了
We're supposed to be getting our wedding photos done in an hour.
你在做什么
What are you doing?
-出来吧 杰瑞 -杰瑞 你可以出来了
- Come on out, Jerry. - Jerry, you can come out.
我们不抓你了 杰瑞
We're not gonna get you, Jerry.
宝贝 冷静点 我很抱歉
Babe, look, calm down. Look, I'm sorry.
闭嘴 杰瑞 我真的受不了了 杰瑞
Shut up, Jerry. I can't fucking take this, Jerry.
她受不了了 快出来
She can't take it. Come on out.
亲爱的 你们为什么要现在玩这个游戏
Honey, why are you playing this game right now?
为什么非要现在跟你朋友玩这个游戏
Why are you playing this game with your friends right now?
为什么他要现在玩
Why is he playing this game right now?
宝贝 听着 你冷静一点好吗
Hey, babe, look. You gotta calm down, okay?
听我说 我接受不了
Listen to me! It's very hard
因为你已经打定主意要毁了一切
because you have decided to ruin everything.
还有你们也是
And so have you.
看你这张蠢脸 你的蠢胡子
With your stupid face, and your stupid beard,
你的蠢眼镜
and your stupid glasses,
还有你的蠢连身裤
and that stupid jumpsuit.
一个女孩子能承受的只有这么多
There's only so much a girl can take,
你们还想让我承受更多 只是为了...
and then you want me on top of that, just to...
老天 你还好吗
Oh, my God. Are you okay?
-宝贝 苏 苏 -杰瑞 天哪
- Babe? Suz? Sue? - Jerry. Oh, my God.
-宝贝 宝宝 -苏
- Boo? Boo-boo? - Sue?
宝宝 宝宝
Boo-boo? Boo-boo?
怎么回事 慢点 怎么回事
What happened? Wait, wait, wait. What happened?
苏珊 你还好吗
Susan, are you okay?
-坐下 快坐下 -是宝宝 宝宝
- Sit down, sit down, sit down. - It's the baby. It's the baby.
终于啊 他就在那儿 轮到谁了 鲍勃 快拍他
It's finally happening. He's right here. Who's it? Bob, tag him.
-你在逗我吗 -什么
- Are you kidding me? - What?
她的宝宝不太好
There's something wrong with her baby.
宝宝根本没事 她是装的
There's nothing wrong with that baby. It's a fake.
你不乐意的话 你拍我 我去
If you won't do it, then tag me. I'm gonna do it.
好吧 你要我拍你 那么
Oh, yeah. Fine. You want me to tag you, then?
哎呀 拍错了