设计爱情（2019）

- Haley. - Haley?
就这样吗
That's it?
你还在期待什么
Did you expect something?
不 我是说
No, I mean...
就这样吗 你就这么走了吗
That's it? You're just going to leave?
我得去排练了
I got to go rehearse.
你是个演员吗
Oh, you're an actress?
歌♥手
Singer.
或者一个油管翻唱艺术家
Or a YouTube cover artist, moonlighting as a
YouTube: 油管 国外视频网站
兼♥职♥一个流浪冒险女孩
wandery adventure girl with just a dash
还是个专业歌♥唱比赛赢家
of professional contest winner.
哦 好
Oh. Cool.
啊对了 我是科尔
I'm, uh, Cole, by the way.
我们在填充简历的话
And as long as we're padding our resumes,
我会近景魔术
I do close up magic.
哇
Wow.
我真的很期待永远都看不到它
I really look forward to never seeing that.
好吧
Okay.
下次见
I'll see you.
如果是命中注定的话
If it's meant to be, I guess.
采访: 迈克尔·伯维尔谈论最近得的奥斯卡奖项
他女儿
Daughter.
♪ 新奥尔良有一栋房♥子 ♪
♪ There is a house in New Orleans ♪
♪ 他们叫它升起的太阳 ♪
♪ They call the Rising Sun ♪
♪ 那是许多可怜男孩的废墟 ♪
♪ It's been the ruin of many a poor boy ♪
设计爱情
♪ 对于我 天呐 也是 ♪
♪ And me, oh, God, for one ♪
我们在看什么
What are we looking at?
我...
I'm...
要和那个女孩约会
going to date that girl.
那儿有一家Arby's
That's an Arby's down there, man.
Arby‘s: 美国连锁快餐店
你知道有多少著名的编剧
Do you know how many famous screenwriters
是出生在一个对的家庭里的
were born into the right family?
埃夫隆 艾布拉姆斯 莉娜·邓纳姆 兰迪斯 保罗·托马斯·安德森
Efron, Abrams, Lena Dunham, Landis, Paul Thomas Anderson.
他们都是的
All of them had an in.
我也有些名字
I have names, too.
索尔金 斯特林 塔伦蒂诺 该死的迈克尔·伯维尔
Sorkin, Sterling, Tarantino, frigging Michael Burwell!
他们想出了奇怪的 轻率的计划吗
Did they come up with like, a weird, hair-brained scheme
还是他们很努力
or did they do hard work?
我正在抓住机会
I'm seizing an opportunity.
我遇到了世界上最棒的编剧的女儿
I met the daughter of the world's greatest screenwriter.
我接近了她 就接近了他
I get close to her, I get close to him
之后就像我没工作几个星期
and then it's like I'm born into Hollywood royalty
就出生在好莱坞皇族
without more than a few weeks of work.
工作就是和一个女孩约会
The work being dating a girl?
不 但你是对的 那是最棒的部分了
No, but you're right. That's the best part.
嗯 第二棒
Well, second best.
我喜欢她 伙计 她很酷
I like this girl, man. She's cool.
结束的时候 就是生活经验
At the end of the day, it's life experience.
这就是你说的我的写作需要的东西
It's what you're saying my writing always needs.
不不不不不 那不是生活经验
No, no, no, no, no, no. This is not life experience.
这是像所有的烂浪漫喜剧里的男人
This is every shitty rom-com where a guy
打赌要睡到一个女孩
makes a bet and he has to sleep with the girl
然后被女生知道了
and then the girl finds out and there's like,
还得有一只珍奇的宠物
an exotic animal pet and I feel like
最后我感觉他们总是因为什么原因去漂流了
they always go on a rafting trip for some reason.
不不不 我不会那么写的
No, no, no. That's not how I'll write it.
没有陈词滥调 没有胡说八道
No Clichés, no bullshit.
我会写一个浪漫喜剧
I'll write a romantic comedy
结果会是…不可抗拒的
that plays out to be... irresistible.
你为什么不直接在脸书上给她发消息呢
Then why can't you just message her on Facebook?
因为
Because.
我有机会写下自己的第一印象
I have an opportunity here to write my own first impression,
额 第二印象 无所谓了
well, second, I guess, but whatever.
帮助我成为一个真正的男孩
Help me learn to be a real boy.
好吧
Fine.
我想看到你成为一个真正的男孩
I would love to see you be a real boy.
七号♥伏特加 谢谢
Vodka seven, please.
两杯
Make that two.
那就14号♥伏特加吧
So, vodka 14.
第一页 人物重写 是吧
Page one character re-write, huh?
哦 我现在已经大学毕业了
Oh, I figure I'm out of school now, so,
那我今天没什么可叛逆的了 我可以喝酒了
as of today I have nothing to rebel against, so I can drink.
你知道其实一般人们为了叛逆而喝酒
You know usually people drink in order to rebel
而不是对喝酒叛逆
instead of rebelling against drinking,
但是管他呢 来吧
but what the heck, let's go.
- 这尝起来像土 - 这是胡椒
- Mmm, this tastes like dirt. - It's pepper.
你已经22了 从来没有谈过恋爱
Uh, you being 22, never having been in a relationship,
我不觉得对你人物或者碳基生命形式的
I don't feel like that's going to sell for you
塑造有帮助
as a character or like a carbon-based life form.
哎哎哎
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
我和女孩在一起过好吗
I been with girls, all right?
另一方面 我觉得
You, on the other hand, I don't think
你从来没和任何人
I've ever seen you once do any part
上过垒
of the baseball analogy with anybody.
和人类
Been with people.
因为就算是一个糟糕的，松散的组合果冻
Because even like a bad, loose assorted Jello
也不会22年都没不小心和女生约过会
wouldn't go 22 years without accidentally dating someone.
所以从这一点切入
So you cut to this.
我们喝了很多酒
We've had lots of drinks.
我们喝了很多酒
We have had a lot to drink.
我知道 但是这个太好莱坞了
I know, but this is too Hollywood.
这就是我要说的
This is what I'm saying.
就像 我们喝下一杯的时候
Like, the waiter would have taken our glass away
服务员会把我们之前的杯子拿走 对吧
when we got another drink, right?
所以为什么它们都还在这儿
So why are they all still here?
服务太差了
That's just bad service.
现实生活中
Like, in real life...
不是这样的吗
Is this not that?
行了
All right.
你脸上这种悲伤 古怪的表情已经足够了
Enough of this sad, quirky, in your head shit.
如果你认为你可以摆脱直的
If you think you can pull off the straight,
白人的 男性领导的东西 而且保持它
white, leading male thing and maintain it,
那就试试吧
give it a shot.
这地方毫无生气 伙计
This place is pretty dead, man.
好吧 我会做的 你认为我不会吗 我会的
All right, I'll do it. You don't think I'll do it? I'll do it.
嗨 你怎么样 我很好 (我是酷)
Hey, how's it going? I'm cool.
- 那是你的台词吗 - 保持在角色里 伙计 那是我的名字
- That's your line? - Stay in character, man, that's my name.
- 酷 - 我刚刚说酷了吗
- Cool? - Did I say cool?
忘记它 假装那是我说的
Crushing it, just pretend it's me.
就是你
It is you, just...
- 嗨 你怎么样 我很好 - 你中风了吗
- Hey, how are you? I'm cool. - So, you're having a stroke?
不 我只是不想伸手
No, I'm keeping my hands to myself.
你的皮肤好软
Your skin is so soft.
就像...
It's like, uh...
新生的小牛皮
newborn calf skin.
- 好甜 - 噫 什么
- That is so sweet. - Ew, what?
- 不 那样很奇怪 - 是挺怪的
- No, that's weird. - Yeah, it's weird.
我摸过多少新生的小牛
How many newborn calves am I touching?
小牛是牛吗 小羊是绵羊吗
Is a calf a cow? Is lamb a sheep?
那是我现在好奇的事情了
These are the things that I'm wondering now.
我喜欢你笑的时候 就像...
I love your laugh It's like a...
现在我满脑子都是羊了
well, all I'm thinking about is sheep now.
你和别人说话的时候看哪里
Where do you look when you talk to someone?
他们的眼睛吗
Their eyes?
不 听起来不对
No, that doesn't sound right.
我不喜欢这个杯子 给我你那个
I don't like this cup. Give me your cup.
我想拿着你的杯子
I want to hold your cup.
这个感觉更好 我更喜欢这个
That's a better vibe. I like that more.
这个一点不好喝
That one's no fun.
- 噫 - 是啊