卡罗琳担任经理

Miss?
小姐
I have to apologize.
我必须道歉
Well, not to me, but I'm sure the Amish are pissed
不必跟我道歉 但我肯定阿曼门诺派要生气了
北美洲戒律严谨的宗教团体
that you're gaying up their look.
因为你让他们的装束显得像基佬
I don't have enough money for the tip.
我不够钱给小费
Weird. You survive the diner chili,
真奇怪 餐厅的辣椒没干掉你
and it's the waitress that kills you!
你却死在了服务员手里!
But I can tip another way. I'm a psychic.
但我能以另一种方式给小费 我是个灵媒
So, uh, you already know
所以 你已经知道
where they're gonna find your body.
你的尸体能在何处找到
Oh, please. I die in a bridge collapse
哦 拜托 我会死于一次大桥坍塌
you have nothing to do with.
这事跟你没有关系
I can tell you your future.
我能告诉你 你的未来
Ha! You're wrong. I don't have one.
哈! 你错了 我没有未来
See the guy in the booth over there?
看见坐在那个位置的家伙没?
Jared "Leto Himself Go"?
杰瑞德·莱托·随他去?
杰瑞德·莱托 摇滚歌手 一头长发
He just offered to read my future as my tip!
他提出给我预示未来以作小费
Ha! You don't have one.
哈! 你都没有未来
Miss, let me read your palm.
小姐 让我看看你的掌心
Sir, coming over here right now is not a good idea.
先生 这时候过来可不是个好主意
We don't like to be stiffed by strangers.
我们不喜欢陌生人不给小费
In six months, maybe, but we're not there yet.
六个月后也许可以 但现在还不行
I'm a legit psychic.
我是正规的灵媒
I predicted long hair was coming back
我曾预言当时机到了
in time to have long hair when it did.
我的头发就会长到这个长度
Okay. You can read my palm.
好吧 你可以
I could use some good news.
我想要听到好消息
I could also use some hand moisturizer... sorry.
我本该抹护手霜的... 抱歉
I see two Ms?
我看到两个M?
You bitch! Have you been holding out on M&M's?
你个贱♥人! 你一直私藏♥m&M's巧克力豆吗?
Ooh! Is it the male model
哦! 是不是指男模特?
I'm managing
我在处理他的事
who's also making it with Max?
他还跟Max做♥爱
Actually... I see a small failure.
其实... 我看见一个小败笔
I take it back. You are good!
我收回我的话 你真的很棒!
Here's your chocolate lemon crumble.
这是你的巧克力柠檬酥皮水果甜点
Sounds like it shouldn't work together, but it does.
虽然听起来它们不搭 但它们还是搭一起了
It's the Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga of desserts.
这是Lady Gaga与Tony Bennett甜品
指乐坛搞怪天后Lady Gaga和国宝级歌手Tony Bennett的合作
Max, can I have just a wee bite?
Max 我能不能咬一小口?
A crumble of the crumble?
吃一点点酥皮的碎渣?
Caroline won't let me eat anything
Caroline不让我吃任何东西
because of my big photo shoot.
因为我要拍写♥真大片
Hurry!
快点!
No chewing, no enjoying. Just swallow.
不要咀嚼 不要品味 直接吞
Spit that out!
吐出来!
No!
不!
I said spit that out!
我说了 吐出来!
You're a model now! Shame on you!
你现在是模特了! 真丢脸!
Bitch, he's starving.
贱♥人 他要饿死了
He's not eating, is he?
他没吃吧 对吗?
I don't want the Stay Puft Marshmallow man
我不希望一个棉花糖一样的男人
showing up at my girlfriend's photo shoot.
出现在我女朋友的写♥真集里
I haven't eaten anything since Tuesday!
我从周二开始就没吃过东西!
This morning, he tried to swallow his toothpaste,
今早 他试图吞下他的牙膏
but I was right there to stop him.
幸好被我阻止了
Good, honey.
干得好 亲爱的
That kind of heartlessness is why I've decided
正因你冷血无情 才让我决定
to make you the manager of our hot new location
让你担任"糕潮"新热门地段的
of the High.
经理
Oh, my God! This is so exciting!
天啊! 太令人激动了!
Someone's finally realizing my full potential,
终于有人看到了我的潜力
and it's not me!
而且那个人不是我!
Will I be able to make Max head pastry chef?
我能让Max做糕点主厨吗?
And where is this new location?
还有 这个新地段在哪儿?
Well, right now, everything's under wraps
这一切都是秘密
the way my face was six months ago.
而我六个月前是这种表情
But as manager, you can hire your own staff,
作为经理 你可以雇用你自己的员工
and I'll even let you poach Max.
我甚至可以让你挖走Max
I'll also tell you
我还可以告诉你
the new spot is amazing.
新地点棒极了
It's international. It's a hub.
很国际化 还是核心地段
I'm talking major flagship.
我说的是大型旗舰店
Honey, I get that you're happy,
亲爱的 我知道你很高兴
but enough with the eye contact.
但眼神交流已经够多了
No one can look me in the eye.
没有人能看着我的眼睛
I'm the Medusa in Chanel.
我是穿着香奈儿的美杜莎
希腊神话中的女妖
Max doesn't let me look her in the eyes
我们做♥爱的时候 Max也不让我
during sex either.
看她的眼睛
I told you, eye contact's extra.
我跟你说过 眼神交流是额外的
Max, did you hear that?
Max 你听见没?
Major flagship!
大型旗舰店!
Uh, did someone just call me a major flag?
呃 刚刚是有人叫我"大旗"吗?
I think you did, and if I don't get to
我猜是你 要是我没能
go to the new place with you two,
跟你们俩去新地方
I'm telling HR.
我要去跟人事专员说
That's Hector Rodriguez, my therapist.
我说的是Hector Rodriguez 我的治疗师
Would you be interested in coming to the new High
你有兴趣加入新"糕潮"
as part of our team?
成为我们的一员吗?
If you say "part of our team" again,
你要是再说"我们的一员"
I'll rethink the whole thing.
这整件事我就要重新考虑了
I'll take it.
我接受
But I have to be upfront with Max.
但我必须跟Max一起在前面
I don't like it in the back.
我不喜欢在后面
Which, by the way, is what I say to all my dates.
顺便一提 我跟每个男伴都是这么说的
Samesies!
我也是!
Well, this is great news.
这真是个好消息
How about we celebrate with a piece of pie?
我们吃个饼庆祝下怎么样?
No!
不行!
Earl, we have great news. Guess what it is.
Earl 我们有好消息 猜猜是什么
No, don't. Okay, guess. No, don't. Yes, guess, guess!
不 不要 好 猜吧 不 不要 好 猜吧!
Can we hurry this along?
我们能不能快点?
My cousin is on Maury Povich today,
我侄子今天上了莫瑞·波维奇的节目
and I wanna find out if he's the father.
我想知道亲生父亲是不是他
'Cause then I can stop paying child support.
因为这样 我就可以不付抚养费了
Sorry. She's a little amped.
抱歉 她有点紧张了
She hasn't had good news to share
自打她发现我们地下室的
since we found out the washing machine
洗衣机会嗑药之后
in our basement takes buttons.
她再也没有别的好消息能分享了
Han, we have good news.
Han 我们有好消息
Sure, you do.
你们也会有好消息
And I'm playing center for the New York Knicks!
那我就是在纽约尼克斯队打中锋的!
Have you seen the Knicks lately?
你们最近有看尼克斯队吗?
He can only help.
他只是帮忙而已
Well, according to my time card,
根据我的考勤卡
I've been here for six hours already,
我到这儿已经有六个小时了
so I'm gonna head back and catch some Zs.
所以我要去后面 小睡一下
The Mattress is all yours, Max.
床是你的了 Max
Hey, everybody. We weren't expecting company.
嘿 各位 我们没想到会有人来
I came by
我过来
to discuss wedding details with Oleg
是和Oleg讨论婚礼细节的
while we had intercourse.
就在我们嘿咻的时候
What is this, the Bunny Ranch?
这什么情况 兔子牧场吗?
Baby, I think these are yours.
宝贝 这是你的吧
Yeah.
对
Yeah. Well, thank you, honey.
嗯 谢谢亲爱的
Can we just make it a general rule
咱们能不能约法三章
that there's no fornication in the diner?
或是不在Han的家里
Or in Han's apartment, ever.
不要在餐厅里乱来?
Okay, Max and I have some really exciting news.
好了 Max和我有个非常好的消息
Yeah, yeah. We know all about the buttons.
是的是的 我们都知晓嗑药的事了
Oleg!
Oleg啊!
I think you crushed my seating arrangement!
你把座位安排都搞乱了!
I'd like to think so.
我倒希望是
So, back to us.
那么 回到我们
How 'bout back to work?
不如回到工作怎么样?
Max and I...
Max和我...
Need to do some work!
该干活了!
There. End of news.
就这样 说完了
Where are you running off to so fast?
你这么急着去哪啊?
Is someone having a sale on smaller heads?
有人要甩卖♥小脑袋吗?
I'm too small, I'm too big... pick one!
一会儿说我小 一会说我大 究竟哪样!
Here's our big news.
我们要宣布好消息
You are looking at the manager
你现在看着的是
and the head pastry chef of the brand-new High location.
全新开张的糕潮点心店经理和甜点主厨
Actually, he's looking at our kneecaps.
其实 他只能看到我们的膝盖
Okay, so we're going with too small.
好吧 看来是我说太小了
If you two quit the diner, how will I ever replace you?
如果你们俩不干了 我上哪找♥人替你们?
Unless I hire... literally anyone else!
除非我再雇佣... 随便谁都行!
No, Han, we still have to work here at night.
不 Han 我们晚上还是会在这里工作
We have more debt than Jada Pinkett-smith
我们欠的债 比跟威尔史密斯老婆
has excuses for Will not being home.
为她老公不在家找的借口还要多
But at the new High,
但在新的糕潮店
we're gonna be the big bosses
我们是发号施令的
calling all the shots.
头头儿们
Yes, yes... by day.
是是是... 白天而已
But by night, you'll be the coleslaw's bitch.
到了晚上 你们还是上酸菜的翠花
Don't listen to him.
别听他的
Clearly, Han just resents our success.
很明显 Han是嫉妒我们的成功
I know! Why can't women ever just be happy for each other?
可不是! 女人何苦难为女人?
Wow, that is really hot.
哇哦 好热辣
Yeah.
嗯
The milder salsa's right here.
这个辣酱不那么辣
Listen... oh!
我说... 哦!
Do girls eat now?
女生们都开始吃东西了吗?
Wow! Lena Dunham changed everything!
哇哦! 莉娜·丹恩把一切都改变了!
Listen, which one of you is sleeping with the model?
你们俩当中的哪个和那个模特上过床的?
I know one of you said you were,
我知道你们有个跟我说了
but I don't listen when you talk.
但你说的时候我没听
She is.
是她
This is a massive ad campaign,
这是个大规模的广告宣传活动
and I don't know how else to say this,
我不知道该怎么说
but I need his penis to look bigger.
但我需要他的弟弟再大点
Oh! Yeah...
哦! 好吧...
It gets nervous when you shine a light on it.
你用光照它是会紧张啦
Sometimes I hear her coaxing it out of its crawl space
有时我还听到她用吃的
with treats.
骗它出洞
Well, do something.
想想办法
I haven't touched one since college,
自我读大学后就没碰过小鸡鸡
and even then it was just to look under it for my keys.
就算碰也是为了找底下的钥匙
Max, take him off set. Be professional.
Max 带他到后场去 专业点
How professional can I be?
我还能怎么专业?
She's asking me to fluff his nutter.
她是要我玩他蛋蛋
Yo, Nash! Break time.
嘿 Nash! 休息一下
So... Marie.
所以... Marie
Did Joe tell you about my big new job promotion?
Joe跟你说了我的升职的新工作吗?
Of course she did. We're lesbians.
当然了 我们是拉拉
Talking is most of what we do.
主要时间就是聊天
It's why we rule daytime.
所以我们统治了白天
Eh... pardon me.
呃... 请原谅
You, maybe. That coat... never.
你还能原谅 那外套罪不可赦
I'm lookin' for someone.
我是找♥人的
You also look like an extra from Angela's Ashes.
你看起来像是"安吉拉的灰烬"跑龙套的
But this is a private shoot,
但这是私人拍摄地
as in we're shooting someone's privates.
也就是说我们在拍摄私人部位
I'm looking for me son.
我在找我儿子
Okay, people! The groundhog's outta the hole!
好了 各位! 土拨鼠出洞啦!
Six more inches of winter.
又多了六英寸啊
That's him! That's me boy!
就是他! 那是我儿子!
Ma?
妈?
Huh?
哈?
Ma, how did you know I was in New York?
妈 你怎么知道我在纽约?
Aw, no, you saw me in the Today Show window,
不是吧 你在"今日秀"窗口看到我了
didn't ya?
对不?
You checked into "America" on Facebook,
你脸书状态改成在"美国"了
you bleedin' idiot.
你个熊孩子
I flew all the way and been lookin' for you day and night
我直接飞到这个被上帝遗忘的脏乱差城市
in this dirty, God forsaken city for a week.
日夜不停地找你一个星期了
I'm takin' you home.
我要带你回家
Ma'am, Nash can make his own decisions.
女士 Nash可以自己做决定
He's a grown man.
他是成人了
Yep. Thanks to my handiwork.
没错 多亏我鼎力相助
He's no grown man. He's just now .
他才不是什么成人 他刚十八岁
He's got his prom next month!
下个月才高中毕业!
I can't believe it!
开玩笑么!
I had sex with a teenager!
我睡了青少年!
Who am I, Woody Allen?
我都成了什么人 伍迪·艾伦?
Roman Polanski?
罗门·波兰斯基?
Pretty much any of your big-time 's movie directors?
基本上所有七十年代的电影导演?
You had sex with me innocent child?
你跟我无知的孩子上床了?
Uh, not so innocent.
呃 没那么无知
He made me blush a few times,
他让我脸红过几次
and I have two positions named after me.
然后我发明了两种体♥位
Well, that's that.
够了
You've seen the last of big booby dirty girl here.
你以后不许再见这个大胸放荡♥女了
I'd object, but when you're right, you're right.
我想反对 但你说得没错
But Ma, I like New York.
可是妈 我喜欢纽约
People want to take pictures of me willy here.
这里的人想拍摄我的小弟弟
This is all me fault.
这都是我的错
I should have never let you watch that Magic Mike.
我从不该让你看"魔力迈克"的
That's great.
这下好了
I don't have a model now.
我现在没模特了
I'm Seal.
完蛋了
Wait until I tell Joe about this.
等着我跟Joe说这事儿吧
How can you not know how old he is?
你怎么能不知道他几岁?
Uh... what can I say? We're a typical couple!
呃... 我能说什么呢? 我们是典型的恋人啊!
He lied about his age, and I pretended he was interesting.
他在年龄上撒谎 而我假装他很有趣
Okay, Max, when Joe gets here,
好吧 Max 等Joe来了
I'm just gonna tell her
我就告诉她
that me managing an underage twink
我照看一个未成年的臭小子
has nothing to do with me managing her restaurant
与我管理她这个卖♥超贵夹馅饼的餐厅
which sells overpriced twink... ies.
没有任何牵连
Yeah. I'm sure she'll be professional about it all.
我相信她在这方面还是非常专业的
Professional?
专业?
Yesterday, she slapped a woman in here
昨天有个女人因为穿了双廉价高跟鞋
for wearing cheap heels.
在这里被她扇了一个耳光
I know. My face is still red.
我知道 我的脸到现在还红肿着呢
Here she is.
她来了
Good morning, Joe!
早上好 Joe!
Hey, ladies.
嗨 姑娘们
Well, obviously, you're both fired.
显然 你们都被炒了
Obviously.
很显然
Can I keep the hat?
我能把帽子留着吗?
You are not gonna want this back.
你不会想把它要回去的
My head sweats like a watermelon at a picnic.
我头上出的汗就像野餐时的西瓜一样多水
Please don't fire us over the Nash situation.
求你了别为了Nash的事情炒了我们
It was out of our hands.
这事儿我们也拿不准
Actually, it was in her hands,
实际上 之前是被她手拿着了
and it was only 18.
而且只有18岁
You two embarrassed my girlfriend.
你们两个让我的女朋友很难堪
And embarrassment in the lesbian community
在蕾丝边的圈子里难堪
is worse than not owning a dog.
比没有养狗还要可怕
It's worse than dating Anne Heche.
比和双性恋谈恋爱还要可怕
Oh, my God. We committed a Heche crime.
哦 天呐 我们犯下了双性罪
How can we make it better?
我们要怎么弥补这件事?
Just get that kid back to the photo shoot tomorrow,
只要那个孩子明天能到摄影棚来
and we're back in business.
这一切就都能恢复正常了
And Max, next time,
还有Max 下次
stay out of his barely legal business.
远离他那还没有合法的部位
Done. Don't know how, but done.
没问题 虽然不懂 但没问题
You won't be sorry.
不会让你失望的
Just get him back, 'cause I gotta tell you...
赶紧把他带回来 我告诉你们...
Marie's crying face?
Marie哭泣的脸?
Not for me.
我可不想看到
Well, coleslaw...
好吧 卷心菜...
just when I thought I was out,
在我觉得我快没戏了的时候
you pulled me back in again.
你拉了我一把
Max, don't tell the coleslaw that.
Max 别对卷心菜说这些
Don't give it that power.
别给它这个权利
My plan to get Nash back will work.
我让Nash回来的计划会成功的
We still have a bright, bright future.
我们依旧有一个光明美好的未来
Yes! By day.
没错! 只有在早上
Han!
Han啊!
Do you want to spend another night
你还想在这个卷心菜桶里
in this coleslaw bucket?
呆一晚上吗?
No. And had I not been able to
不想 而且上次我如果没能
roll myself out to the street,
自己滚到大街上的话
I might have suffocated!
我可能就窒息而死了!
Nash and his mom will be here any minute, Max.
Max Nash和他妈随时都有可能到店里来
Do you really need to expose % of your boobs?
你真有必要把自己五分之三的胸都露出来吗
It's not up to me.
这不取决于我
These girls have a life of their own.
这对白妞有自己的生活
The right one just started a Fleetwood Mac cover band.
右边这位刚组建了一个翻唱Fleetwood Mac的乐队
You know how I know?
你知道到我怎么发现的吗?
'Cause when I take my bra off, it goes its own way.
因为我把胸罩脱掉的时候 它自顾自的走了
出自该乐队的歌名"go your own way"
Do you really think you can get Nash's mother
你真的认为Nash的妈妈来这里
to change her mind when they come in
拿Nash落下的行李之时
to pick up the rest of his stuff?
你能改变她的想法吗?
Yes, I do.
是的
Because she and I have a lot in common.
因为我们两个有很多共同点
I may not be Irish, but I'm dirt poor,
我虽然不是爱尔兰人 但我也一样穷
and I'm living with someone who drinks way too much.
而且我也和一个嗜酒如命的人住在一起
Max, look.
Max 你看
All those purple post-its
所有这些紫色的便贴
are Sophie's friends and family.
都是Spohie的家人和朋友
My family's nowhere to be seen!
几乎没我亲戚的位置!
It's like I'm looking at the last U.S. census!
就和我上次看美国人口普查一样!
Hey, girls. Come over here.
姑娘们 快过来
We need your help with the seating chart.
我们需要你们帮忙排这个座位表
Yeah. You know, planning a wedding is more work
筹办婚礼可比在满月之时
than waxing Oleg's back during a full moon.
给Oleg的背上打蜡工作量要多
Sophie, I have my own issue right now.
Sophie 我现在有我自己的事情要解决
Okay. Then Max can help me with the chart
好吧 那Max可以来帮我排座次
while you go worry about your obviously thinning hair.
你就去担心你明显日渐变少的头发吧
Uh, full disclosure...
我全面透露一下
the last time someone asked me to help them with something,
上一次有人让我帮忙的时候
I free-based half their beard off.
我把他们的胡子吸掉了一半
I just got a text from Nash.
我收到Mash的短信
He's here? I'll go get him a kid's menu.
他到了? 我去给他拿份儿童菜单
They're not coming.
他们不来了
His mom found the racy pictures I sent him.
他妈妈看到了我之前发给他的猥亵图片
"Flying out of JFK tomorrow.
"明天从JFK机场起飞
Taking the morning Aer Lingus"?
坐爱尔兰航空的早班机"
A little morning "Aer Lingus"?
早上的"爱尔兰飞机"?
Isn't that what got Max in trouble in the first place?
不正是这飞机让Max陷入困境吗?
Okay, well, we just have to go to the airport
好吧 我们要做的就是赶到机场
and stop them.
然后拦住他们
I'll buy us plane tickets and then return them,
我会买♥好机票然后再把他们退掉
like I do with shoes or Tom Cruise does with wives.
就像我买♥鞋或者是汤姆·克鲁斯对待他老婆一样
Jackets and shoes off!
脱掉外套和鞋子!
And make sure you check all your pockets.
确认所有口袋里都没有遗漏物品
Don't make me shut this airport down for a piece of gum.
不要让我因为一片口香糖戒♥严整个机场
This line is longer than the movie Gone Girl.
这队比排队看"消失的爱人"都要长
What does TSA stand for? "Time Stands A-still"
TSA是什么意思? "时间静止不动"
That's cute. Never heard that one before.
真有意思 从来没听到过这个版本
Most people just go with "This Sucks Ass."
大多数人都会认为是 "这一坨翔"
Max, please don't yell out again.
Max 别再大声喊叫了
People get very jumpy in airports.
人在机场会变得非常神经兮兮的
Oh, what? It's not like I screamed, "I have a bomb"
什么? 我喊的又不是 "我带了个炸♥弹"
Miss, will you step over here, please?
女士 请你站到这边来好吗?
Oh, I was kidding. I don't have a bomb.
我说笑的 我不是真的带了个炸♥弹
But I have been known to... be DA bomb.
但是大家都觉得我... 有胸器
Max!
Max啊!
Please, please, if we step away,
求你了 如果我们走开了
we'll lose our place in line.
我们之前排的位置就没了
I know it sounds like we're here to blow up a plane,
我知道我们听起来像是来炸机场的
but we're really just here to stop an underage kid
但是实际上我们只是来阻止一个
she had sex with from leaving the country.
和她滚床单的未成年人离开这个国家
So I should just come over there now.
我还是直接过来吧
Yep. You just been hand-picked
没错 你刚刚被我亲手加入了
to join the "I don't trust you" dance party.
"我不信任的人"行列
May I see your tickets?
请出示你们的机票?
Nice day. I like your hair.
天气不错 我喜欢你的发型
Thanks. We're allowed to be creative
谢谢 我们只有脖子以上的部分
from the neck up.
可以自由发挥
Ooh! You traveling to Paris.
哦! 你们要去巴黎
First-class.
还是头等舱
In those jeans?
就穿这身?
You got first-class tickets to Paris?
你买♥的是去巴黎的头等舱机票?
Are you insane?
你疯了吗?
My fingers did it.
我的手指自动选的
It was rich girl cellular memory.
那是富家女的细胞记忆
And if we're not going anywhere,
既然咱们哪儿都不去
why can't we not go to Paris?
那为啥不能假装去巴黎?
And why can't we not go to the Louvre?
干嘛不假装要去卢浮宫?
And why can't we not stay in the penthouse at the George Cinq
干嘛不假装要去住豪华酒店顶层套房
and not order room service?
还能叫客房服务?
Is it too late for me to say I don't know her?
现在说我不认识她是不是太晚了?
Ma'am, are you carrying any explosives?
女士 你有没有携带爆♥炸♥物?
I had leftover Chipotle for breakfast.
我早餐吃的是墨西哥餐厅的剩菜
Does that count?
那算吗?
It does to whoever's sitting next to you.
对坐在你旁边的人就算
Air France flight
法国航空号航班
will now begin boarding at gate .
现在于号登机口开始登机
Max! That's our flight.
Max! 那是我们的航班
Air France, flight .
法国航空号航班
Ooh! I bet on the plane,
哦! 我打赌这飞机上
they'll have caviar and Bellinis.
航空餐会有鱼子酱和贝利尼鸡尾酒
You know what won't be on the plane?
你知道上面没有什么吗?
Us!
我们!
We're not going!
我们不去了!
Have you been smoking the half joint
你是不是偷抽了我藏在胸罩里的
I have hidden in my bra?
那半支大♥麻?
You have a joint?
你竟然有大♥麻?
Bank account?
我是说银行账户?
You went through security with pot?
你带着大♥麻过了安检?
I went through third grade with pot.
我三年级就是带着大♥麻过的
There he is. There's Nash.
找到他了 Nash在那儿
I'm sure his mom is asking
我想他妈妈肯定在问
if he can visit the cockpit and meet the pilot.
能不能让他去参观驾驶舱 见见飞行员
Wow. He's young.
哇喔 他真嫩
So young, Bruce Jenner has been a woman
布鲁斯·詹纳变成女人
布鲁斯·詹纳: 卡戴珊家族男主人 已宣布变性
for most of his life.
也都有这些年数了
Nash! Please.
Nash! 求你了
You can't go. Our entire lives depend on
你不能走 我们今后的人生
you finishing that photo shoot.
都取决于你能否完成那次摄影了
Nash Terrence O'Brien, you're not going anywhere.
Nash Terrence O'Brien 你哪里都不准去
Or I'll take you over my knee right here.
否则我现在就抱你坐我腿上
Well, he likes that.
好吧 他很喜欢那样
Well, you...
你...
You are just loose as a goose, aren't ya?
你还真是逍遥放肆
Again... when you're right, you're right.
好吧... 你又说对了一次
Max, let me talk to Mrs. O'Brien.
Max 让我和O'Brien女士谈
Go up to the gate.
去登机口等着
Ask what movie they're showing on their flight.
问问她们航班上会放什么电影
Okay, but if they're showing anything,
好吧 如果她们要放任何
and I mean anything
我再强调一遍
from Mr. Adam Sandler...
任何亚当·桑德勒的电影...
I'm getting on the plane too.
我就要上飞机了
Please. I'm begging you.
拜托了 我求你
You don't know me. I'm a proud woman.
你不了解我 我很高傲的
The only other time I ever begged
我唯一一次求别人
was to get off of P. Diddy's yacht.
是为了从吹牛老爹的游艇下来
I mean, a party shouldn't be three days long.
连着开了三天的派对太久了
Miss, you can save your silly breath.
小姐 你可以省省这些废话了
I'm taking him home.
我要带他回家
Would passenger Maeve O'Brien please report to the gate desk?
请Maeve O'Brien到登机服务台
Oh, Nash, maybe they're bumping us up
Nash 也许他们同意把我们的座位
from the last coach row to the second to the last coach row!
从最后一排调到倒数第二排了!
I knew I'd be rewarded for not having any abortions
我就知道 我从未堕胎的行为
in spite of me circumstances.
肯定是会有回报的
Grab Nash... let's get out of here
带上Nash... 在她分神的时候
while I got her distracted.
我们快走
Max, you did that? How?
Max 那是你干的? 怎么做到的?
I no longer have the half a joint in my bra.
我胸罩里的半支大♥麻没了
You bribed an airline employee with a joint?
你用大♥麻贿赂了航空公司的人?
Pain? Oh, you really gotta stretch out for that.
我是指关节痛? 你应该多做伸展运动
Max, this is kidnapping.
Max 这是绑架
Oh, he's not that young. When I was his age,
他也没那么小 我在他这个年纪的时候
I had already robbed three Blockbuster videos.
已经抢了三家百视达影碟店了
What's Blockbuster video?
百视达影碟店是什么?
Oh, my God, I screwed a baby.
天啊 我把一个孩子给毁了
Okay. I'm gonna text Joe and tell her we have Nash
好吧 我发条短信给Joe 告诉她
in our custody. No, I'd better call.
我们已经抓到Nash了 我还是打电♥话吧
That text won't play well at our trial.
在我们受审的时候 短信会出卖♥我们
I'm sorry I didn't tell ya I was so young.
对不起 没有告诉你我是如此年幼
But honestly, I didn't think it mattered
但说实话 因为你也不成熟
since you're so immature.
所以我觉得没关系
I know you are, but what am I?
我知道你不成熟 但我成什么了
Okay, so Joe was really impressed
好了 Joe对我们的绑架行动
with the kidnapping, and she gave us our jobs back.
非常满意 她把工作还给我们了
But Nash, you've been replaced.
可是Nash 你被换掉了
They found another model
他们找了另外一个
who wouldn't give them any parent trouble...
不会有家长干涉的模特...
a well-hung orphan.
一个大屌♥孤儿
A well-hung orphan.
大屌♥孤儿
Well, the Lord gives and the Lord takes.
主有所给 必有所取
So what now?
那现在怎么办?
Well, you go back to Ireland and brag to your friends
你回爱尔兰 可以向你的朋友炫耀
about having sex with someone who once had sex
你与一个和艾克索·罗斯最好朋友的儿子
艾克索·罗斯: 美国传奇硬摇滚乐队主唱
with Axl Rose's best friend's son.
上过床的女人上过床了
Good-bye, Max.
再见 Max
Later, Nash Potater.
再见 Nash小可爱
You know, I think I'm gonna miss him.
我觉得我会想他的
Especially since kids eat free at Quiznos before :.
尤其是现在小朋友在六点前可以免♥费在奎兹诺斯快餐店用餐
Let's get out of here.
我们走吧
The only good thing about airports
机场唯一的好处就是
is leaving them for someplace better.
离开了它 就能去更好的地方
Max, next time we're here, I'm gonna take you to Paris.
Max 我们下次再来 我会带你去巴黎
Well, first take me to the bathroom.
先带我去厕所吧
I've had to pee since our tram hit that pothole.
早在电车遇坑颠那一下的时候 我就想上厕所了
Well, at least we're gonna be working somewhere with class.
至少我们能去个有格调的地方工作了
I wonder where it is.
Joe说那是个真正的中心 旗舰 国际化
Joe said it's a real hub, flagship, international.
我很好奇那是在哪里
Yeah. It's gonna be international terminal !
没错 那就是八号国际航班候机楼!
What?
什么?
Here?
这里?
We're working here?
我们要在这里工作?
I've got to find out who I brutally murdered
我必须得弄清楚我前世到底
in a previous life and make it up to him or her.
残忍谋杀了谁 这辈子才要来还债的
This sucks! The one place
这太糟了! 这是唯一
no one will ever give us a ride to work!
没人愿意送我们来上班的地方!
Final boarding for Air France, flight .
法国航空号航班 最后一次登机通知
Of course it is.
的确糟透了
Look at the bright side. These days, most planes
往好的方面看 这年头 很多飞机
don't even make it to where they're supposed to go.
根本没法顺利飞到目的地
Paging first-class passengers Caroline Channing
请头等舱乘客Caroline Channing和Max Black
and Max Black.
速来登机口
Those rich bitches are so lucky!
那俩富家女真幸运!