苏菲奥列格大战一触即发

Care for a cupcake?
来个纸杯蛋糕吗?
Well, our new outdoor seating area
我们的新的室外座位区
is about as popular as Paula Deen at an NBA game.
就如保拉·迪恩在NBA现场一样倍受冷落
保拉·迪恩: 美国明星厨师
How much longer do we have to be out here?
我们还要在这里坐多久?
We are cold.
我们好冷
So, so cold.
超级冷
I can see my breath.
我都能看到呼出的空气
And my boys are up by my rib cage.
我的鸡鸡冻得戳到胸口了
I can smell his breath.
我都能闻到他的口臭
And my boys are up by where my boys used to be.
我的鸡鸡被冻得跟年轻时一样硬了
And these customers aren't helping.
这些顾客根本帮不上忙
How could we have thought a strong Han presence
我们怎么会以为Han坐在门口
would make it more popular?
能增加蛋糕销量的?
Max, in hindsight,
Max 我就说了吧
it feels like us not springing for those heat lamps
不重新花钱去买取暖灯
was a bad call.
是个错误的决定
Uh, you think?
是你自己觉得吧?
Guys, I just peed a little to keep warm.
各位 为了保暖 我刚撒了点尿
Well, I peed a little
我也撒了点尿
'cause I had no choice.
因为我没办法了
Great, they're stuck to the bench.
好吧 他们黏在长椅上了
Go get the windshield scraper.
去把挡风玻璃铲拿过来
Reading Us Weekly, Earl?
你在看"我们"周刊吗 Earl?
Ooh, "Stars. They're just like us."
噢 "明星 和平凡人一样"
Well, if they're just like us, where's the picture
如果他们真和我们一样 那怎么没有
of them turning their underwear inside out?
他们把内♥裤翻过来重复穿的照片?
Caroline left it in the men's room.
Caroline把这个留在了男厕所里
And as I said that out loud,
当我把这话说出来时
I realized that I must have been in the ladies' room.
我就意识到我肯定是错入了女厕所
I can't see, Max.
我眼睛不好 Max
Max, I've got some exciting news!
Max 我有个让人兴奋消息!
Eh, I vowed I'd never get excited about anything again
我发过誓 在看过最后一部"夺宝奇兵"之后
after that last Indiana Jones.
我不会再为任何事兴奋了
I found us two discount heat lamps on Sherry's list.
我在"雪丽清单"网上找到了两盏折扣取暖灯
It's like Craigslist, but without the high probability
它和分类广告网相似 但降低了
of being murdered by a deranged medical student.
被某个疯狂医学生杀掉的风险
And about those lamps?
那些取暖灯?
Uh, no.
才不要
We can't worry about our outdoor business.
我们不必再担心室外生意啦
We barely have an indoor business.
因为店里都快没生意了
And we never will, with that attitude.
照你这个态度 我们再也不会有生意了
I'm gonna ask you one more time:
我再求你一次:
please listen to those Tony Robbins tapes
拜托去听听我们在垃圾里找到的
we found in the garbage.
托尼·罗宾斯的励志磁带吧
Well, girls,
姑娘们
tomorrow's the day I've been looking forward to
明天就是我盼了三年的
for three years.
大好日子
You're getting your teeth cleaned?
你要去洗牙了吗?
Sorry, that's what's we've been looking forward to.
抱歉 那是我们盼望着的事情
I'm moving in with Sophie.
我要搬去和Sophie同居
From now on, the booty call is coming from inside the house.
从现在开始 不出家门我也能上辣妹了
I couldn't help but overhear.
我只是无意听到的
From way back there?
这么远都能听到?
Your ears should give a pep talk to the other parts of your body.
你的耳朵真该给你的全身做个身残志坚的演讲
And, Oleg, if you need any help with the move,
Oleg 如果你搬家需要帮手的话
might I offer my services?
我可以去帮你忙吗?
My trainer Skylar says I'm getting ripped.
我的教练Skylar说我有肌肉了
Yeah, ripped off by Skylar.
是啊 你是Skylar给坑了吧
Thanks, Han.
谢了 Han
And as a bit of a payback,
作为小小的回报
I'll wash my hands back here tonight.
我今晚回来时会洗手的
See you later, neighbors.
一会儿见 邻居们
Oleg's moving in?
Oleg要搬过来?
This is the worst thing that's ever happened to me.
这是我遇上最糟糕的事情
And I lost $ billion.
比损失了10亿还糟糕
What is the problem? This is all good news.
有什么问题? 这都是好消息
Sophie and Oleg are in love.
Sophie和Oleg相爱了
Yeah!
没错!
And they'll be in love
他们就会在我们的楼梯上
on our stairs,
在我们的大厅里
in our hallway,
在洗衣房
and on every surface of the laundry room.
所有的平面上相亲相爱
What do you know about love anyway, Christian Single?
再说 你懂什么爱 单身"相亲"汉?
I know Jesus has a girl for me.
我知道上帝为我准备了妹子
He has to.
他必须准备
I'm $400 deep into that damn website.
我在相亲网上花了400刀
Look, we just make a pact
听着 我们必须制定条约
that no matter what happens upstairs,
无论楼上 楼梯上
or on the stairs or in the laundry room,
还是洗衣房里发生了什么事
we don't invite it into our apartment.
绝对不能让他们进我们的公寓
Hey, everybody!
各位好!
It's raining cats and goats out there.
外面在下倾盆大羊
Don't you mean "cats and dogs"?
你是想说"倾盆大雨"吗?
Oh, it's so nice to be corrected as you walk in the door.
一走进门就被纠正错误的感觉真好
Hey, baby.
嘿 宝贝
Can you believe in hours we'll be living in sin?
你能相信小时内 我们就要活在罪恶里吗?
Oh, don't worry.
别担心
My parents don't know.
我父母不知道
I'm having a dinner party tomorrow night to celebrate.
我明晚要开个晚宴来庆祝
And also because I have pounds of beef
还有个原因 我有磅牛肉
that's about to go bad.
快要变质了
So, Max, Caroline, are you in?
Max Caroline 你们来吗?
Actually, Sophie, we're busy...
Sophie 其实我们很忙...
We'll be there.
我们会去的
If there's beef involved, I'm involved.
只要有牛肉 我就会去
What happened to the pact we just made?
你忘了我们刚才制定的条约吗?
I hate to tell you this...
我真不愿告诉你...
if it comes down to you or beef,
要在你和牛肉间选的话
I'm always going beef.
我永远会选牛肉
That was Sherry from Sherry's list.
是"雪丽清单"的雪丽发来的
She makes you call her that.
她非要我那么叫她
She said she's consider charging us $150
她可以考虑取暖灯只收我们150刀
if we pick up the heat lamps themselves.
她说如果我们能自己去提货
And I'm charging you with three counts of interrupting
你打扰了我看"坐劣质高脚凳的婴儿"视♥频
this "Baby in a Faulty High Chair" video.
我要罚你三倍的金额
Someone fell in real life!
有人摔倒了!
You told me you had it.
你说在你手上的
I said I didn't have it.
我说了我没拿
It's Oleg and Han moving in.
是Oleg和Han在搬家
Get away from the door!
离门远点!
Han will see your feet under the door.
Han能从门缝里看到你的脚
They're right at his eye level.
这正对他的视平线啊
This is like a horror movie... Saw III.
简直就是恐怖片... 电锯惊魂
Because when Han bent over,
因为Han弯腰的时候
I saw inches of his crack.
我看到他露出的英寸屁♥股沟
So you saw his whole crack?
所以你啥都看到了?
Step away!
后退!
Open the door, Max.
开门 Max
I'm about to kill Han,
我要杀了Han
and I know you're gonna want to see that.
我知道你想看的
Damn it! He's right.
该死! 他说得对
Cute outfit, Han.
这服装挺可爱的 Han
Like one of those male strippers
穿的和"雷霆猛♥男"里面的
from "No Thunder From Down Under."
脱衣舞男一样
This is so heavy.
这箱子太重了
Oleg, what do you have in here?
Oleg 你这里面装了什么呀?
Socks!
袜子!
Really, Han,
不是吧 Han
It's like your arms are only there for decoration.
你的两条胳膊只是用来装饰的啊
To be fair, Oleg's socks
公平来说 Oleg的袜子里
probably have some pretty heavy loads in them.
也许装着他千千万万的子孙后代
Oleg, what is all your junk doing out here?
Oleg 你把你的垃圾都堆这干嘛?
Do I actually smell girls screaming?
我把东西搬上去 Sophie说了句"我不要"
I bring things up, Sophie says "No,"
我确实是听到妹子的尖叫声了吗
I bring them right back down.
我就得把这些东西都搬回去
Is there no elevator up in this bitch?
这烂楼里就没个电梯吗?
Oleg, you forgot your painting,
Oleg 你忘了你的画
and this one's a definite "No."
这也是明确被拒绝的东西之一
Sophie, I haven't gotten a "Yes" yet,
Sophie 我还没听到你说一句"我要"呢
aside from the quickie we had up against the bathroom sink.
除了咱俩在厕所洗水池上速战速决那会儿
Not such a quickie.
哪是什么速战速决
They locked me out and I had to eat my lunch in the truck.
他们把我锁在外面 我只得在货车里吃午饭
Then what was the point of me renting a moving truck?
那我租一辆货车又有什么意义?
I mean, besides the rough sex we had up against the sides?
除了可以倚着车厢壁完成高难度动作的一炮
They locked me outside on the side of the road for that one.
那次他们把我锁在车外 扔在路上了
Okay, well, we have to go back in.
好了 我们该回去了
See you tonight at the beef-a-thon.
今晚的牛肉全餐见
No, Oleg.
不 Oleg
Maybe I'm being unfair.
也许是我做得不公平
I mean, you have all this stuff that you like,
这些东西都是你喜欢的
and they have an apartment.
而她们又有个公寓
Put it in there.
把它们放进去吧
Sophie!
喂Sophie!
I'll see you at 8:00!
8点见!
So what do you say, girls?
你们说呢 妹子们?
Absolutely not...
绝对不行
Yes.
可以
Max, there's a method to my madness.
Max 我答应自有我的道理
Oleg, will you excuse us a second?
Oleg 可以让我们说几句话吗?
And maybe help Han with that box.
你可以帮帮Han拿箱子
In those shorts, I can actually see a hernia happening.
站在那堆短裤里面 他都要得疝气了
I thought we weren't getting involved!
如果我们帮Oleg的忙
If we help Oleg out,
我还以为我们不牵涉其中的!
he'll let us use the moving truck
他会把那辆货车借给我们
to pick up our heat lamps.
去运我们的加热灯啊
I already said "No" to those.
我已经说了"我不要"
But we just talked about it!
但是我们说好了啊!
I wasn't listening!
我没在听啊!
That baby fell face-down into mashed potatoes.
那个小宝宝可是把脸摔进了土豆泥里了!
But you said "Yes" to the dinner party,
但是你答应了这个牛肉全餐
so if you get your meat, I get my heat.
所以你要吃你的肉 那我要我的热
Just because you rhyme doesn't make it okay.
别以为你说得押韵我就同意了
And I'm pretty sure that's what Rihanna said to Chris Brown.
而且那句话肯定是蕾哈娜对克里斯·布朗说的
Where are we meeting this chick with the heat lamps?
我们要去哪里跟这妹子见面买加热灯啊
I haven't gone this far for something I didn't want
自从计划生育在新泽西实施起
since Planned Parenthood moved to New Jersey.
我就没有为自己不想要的东西而跑过这么远
Hello!
喂!
I'm getting truck sick back here.
我在后面都要晕车了
You're a worse driver than people assume I am.
人人皆认为我的开车技术烂 你比我还烂
Come on! Come on!
快点! 快点!
We're gonna be late to dinner!
我们快要赶不上晚餐啦!
Would any of you be interested in playing
有人愿意和我玩剪刀石头布吗
rock-paper-scissors for a seat up front?
赢的人就可以坐前面
No!
不行!
Girls, can I ask you a relationship question?
妹子们 我可以问你们一个感情问题吗
No!
不行!
And besides, what would we know about relationships?
而且 我们哪会了解什么感情问题
That's like asking Donald Trump
就像你去问唐纳德·特朗普
for the name of a good hairstylist.
有什么好发型师一样
I mean, what's the deal with her?
她到底是怎么回事?
She asks me to move in,
她让我搬过去
and then won't even let me have my painting?
但是连一副画都不能带过去?
I mean, Sophie already bought the cow.
Sophie连奶牛都买了一头
She might as well let the cow's crap in.
她也许还会允许那奶牛拉屎
So you're saying I'm right.
所以你的意思是我有理
No, no, but I do think...
不 不 但我确实觉得...
No, you don't think,
不 你才不觉得
or your mouth wouldn't be moving right now.
你纯粹就是没话找话说罢了
I'm just saying,
我只是说
he has the right to move some of his stuff
他有权把他的东西搬进
into Sophie's apartment and out of ours.
Sophie公寓 并从我们公寓搬出去
Speaking of his stuff,
说起他的东西
there's something in a box back here
这盒子里面有个东西
is humming, and... oh, it stopped.
正震动... 哦 停下了
Oh, it started again.
哦 又开始了
That's my lifelike mouth with authentic jaw action.
这玩意可是有着仿真的人类嘴部
Oleg, watch the road!
Oleg 看路!
The last words I hear can't be "lifelike mouth."
我真心不想听到"仿真嘴" 这种东西
Everything looks very nice, Sophie.
你这里相当不错啊 Sophie
Yeah, see,
是嘛
I'm not gonna talk until the other guests arrive.
在其他客人来到之前我不打算说话
I got to save my hostess sparkle for the real guests.
我要把热情的待客之道留给真正的贵宾
Hey, baby.
嘿 宝贝
Where the hell have you been?
你究竟死哪儿去了
That was a pretty loud sparkle.
这待客之道真是热情的要命
It's my fault we're late, Sophie...
Sophie 大伙儿迟到全怪我
It's okay. Just sit down.
没事 坐下吧
Don't you want to know what I was...
你想不想知道我刚刚...
No, really.
不想
I got a pot roast over here
我这里的炖牛肉
that's a hell of a lot more interesting.
比你有趣多了
Max, thank God you're here.
Max 感谢上帝你来了
There was so much awkward silence,
刚才的安静真是太尴尬了
I pretended I got a phone call from a banana.
我还得假装接到一条香蕉的来电
I'm gonna take a quick shower.
我得去厕所冲一冲
Oh, Oleg, Dinner is ready.
Oleg 晚饭做好了
You don't have time to run down to the "Y" now.
没时间让你去打♥飞♥机了啊
No, I meant I would shower here.
不 我是说要在这里冲个澡
Here...
这里...
In my bathroom?
用我的浴室?
Uh...
呃...
Yeah.
是啊
I live here now.
我都搬来住了
Oh, yeah.
哦 对啊
That's right.
还真是呢
Imagine that.
我要想象一下
Hey, Oleg, why don't you just come over here
嘿 Oleg 你不如过来
and sit next to Earl?
坐Earl旁边?
Because he's old and I'm sure his smeller is shot.
因为他年纪大了 嗅觉没那么灵敏的
Sophie, you really must write a "how to entertain" book.
Sophie你一定要出本"待客之道"的书
Here we go:
要上菜了
Grandma Chinkski's pot roast.
金克斯基姥姥的招牌炖肉
This looks amazing.
看起来真可口
I love a root vegetable in the winter.
我特喜欢在冬天吃根菜
Can it ever just be about me?
可以只以我为中心吗?
# Beef, beef, beef #
# 小啊小牛肉 #
# B-beef, b-beef, beef #
# 牛啊牛啊肉 #
What? That's my beef song.
咋了 我在唱自己的牛肉歌啊
I'd like to make a toast to Sophie.
我想敬Sophie一杯
Oh, that's sweet.
真是贴心
But not with that glass.
但别用那酒杯
That's Grandma Chinski's crystal.
那是金斯基姥姥的玻璃杯
Baby, I was in the middle of a toast.
宝贝 我正在给你敬酒呢
Oh, I'm sorry, but...
真是不好意思 可...
those are my favorite thing!
这些杯子是我的最爱啊!
Grandma Chinski traded two of my slow cousins for those.
是金斯基姥姥用两个傻表兄换来的
Well, you know, it's funny.
说来好笑
I have a favorite thing too.
我也有个最爱
In fact, why don't I just go and get it?
要不 我去拿来给你看看?
I can't believe it.
真不敢相信
I'm about to meet Loni Anderson!
马上就要见着洛尼·安德森了!
洛尼·安德森 美国女星
Can someone help me lift up my fork?
有人能帮我提下叉子吗?
My arms are still sore from the move.
搬趟东西我的双臂已经酸得不行了
Open up.
张开嘴
Someone else has to feed Han.
换你们来喂Han吧
He just licked my pinky.
他刚刚舔到了我的小指
Earl, what are you doing over there?
Earl 在那干啥呢?
Just hanging out with R&B sensation,
在陪节奏布鲁斯歌手闲逛呢
Mary J.-juana.
大名鼎鼎的大♥麻玛丽
Oh, good.
好极了
So you're in the right mind-set to hand-feed a -year-old man.
你这心态最适合去喂一个岁的男人了
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
哦 别别别别
I think that's Polish for "No."
我估计波兰人就这么说"不"的
Uh... huh. Yes, Sophie.
啊哈 就是这个 Sophie
It's my painting. Excuse me... our painting.
这是我的油画 说错了 我们的油画
And it's going up on our wall.
现在要挂在我们的墙上
Is it me,
是我的问题呢
or is this party tense as hell?
还是这派对的气氛相当紧张啊?
I don't think Sophie and Oleg are gonna make it.
我觉得Sophie和Oleg合不来啊
Uh... oh. Am I talking out loud right now?
啊哦... 我大声说出来了吗?
I told you, I don't want that thing in here.
早跟你说了 我不要这东西挂在这里
I don't understand. It's just a painting.
我不明白 不就是幅油画嘛
What's so bad about it?
有什么大不了的?
Oh, my God.
我的天哪
Nice, huh?
不错吧?
I did it myself.
我亲手画的
It's a paint-by-numbers.
我的个人肖像
You mean it's a Putin-by-numbers.
你是想说普京肖像吧
Why are his nipples so big?
为什么上面乳♥头这么大?
They don't seem that big to me.
我觉得不会太大啊
Oh, I am too high for this.
哦 我已经嗨得受不了
I'm not high enough.
我还不够嗨呢
In my culture, big nipples mean power and wealth.
在我那 大♥乳头意味着财富和权力
In our culture, big nipples means,
在我这 大♥乳头意味着
"Wears a t-shirt in the pool."
"麻烦穿上衣服再去泳池"
There.
挂好了
I like it.
我挺喜欢的
Adds a certain something to the room.
给这房间带来种莫名的格调
Every wall needs nipples.
每面墙都得挂上乳♥头
So a guy knows where to look.
那样男人们就知道看哪了
Thank you for telling me to do this, Caroline.
谢谢你的主意 Caroline
She did?
她的主意?
I'd get up and run, but my legs are like taffy.
我想站起来溜走 但我双腿发软
Seriously,
说真的
you told him to hang that thing up?
你居然让他把那玩意儿挂起来?
In fairness, I had not seen the painting
说实在的 我当时还没见着那油画
when I suggested something like that.
所以我才这么建议他的
I mean, I get it.
我是说 我明白
It's gorgeous.
这确实很霸气
But it doesn't go with the decor.
但这跟屋内的装潢不搭
What?
什么?
Is it throwing off this gorgeous outdoor-indoor swing?
所以你要丢掉这幅霸气的里外两用的挂像?
I'll cut you with the carving knife!
再说小心我拿餐刀砍你!
Nobody is cutting anyone.
谁也别砍谁
Especially not me.
特别是我
Do you never learn?
你不懂吗?
Just put some beef in your napkin like I did,
赶紧像我这样用餐巾包住牛肉
and let's get out of here.
然后赶紧离开这里
Sophie, you asked me to move in.
Sophie是你叫我搬来住的
Guess what? I moved in.
现在可好? 我搬进来了
Yes, I asked you to move in,
是 是我叫你搬来的
but not with big weird-nipple Putin.
但没说带上这乳♥头大得出奇的普京像
Well, how big are nipples supposed to be?
那多大的乳♥头算正常?
'Cause... never mind.
因为... 算了
And what's your problem anyway?
那你现在又发什么疯?
I gave you a drawer.
我都给你挪了个抽屉
This!
就这个!
This is my drawer, everybody.
大家快看 这就是我的抽屉
What good is this?
这么小有什么用?
I can't even get one of my ball gags in there.
连个堵嘴球都装不下
You asked for a drawer, I gave you a drawer!
你说要个抽屉 这不给了你个抽屉!
And who needs ball gags anyway?
再说谁用得上一打堵嘴球?
Oh, so now you don't like ball gags?
哦 现在你又不喜欢戴堵嘴球了?
Who are you, lady?
你个女人算什么?
I'll tell you who I am...
我告诉你我就是...
I'm the lady who's "Putin" this is the trash!
我就是把这普京像丢进垃圾桶的女人!
You trash that, I'll trash this.
你丢那个我就砸了这个
Oh, no.
哦 别
Oh, you think you're gonna break
哦 你是觉得你能摔
one of Grandma Chinski's glasses?
金斯基姥姥的玻璃杯是吧?
No, if anyone's gonna break one, it's gonna be me!
没门 就算是摔 也是老娘摔!
This reminds me of the first half of my second marriage,
这让我想起了我第二段婚姻的前半段
and the second half of my third marriage.
和我第三段婚姻的后半段
Sophie, I'm done.
Sophie我受够了
And as you said to me on our first date,
正如你第一次约会时跟我说
"I don't know how much more of this I can take."
"我不知道自己受得了多少"
Fun party.
多么有趣的聚会啊
Not awkward at all.
一点都不尴尬
I should get going though.
但是我真该走了
Got to be up early for... what's a thing?
我明天还得早起... 去啥来着?
Church?
教会?
Beef, beef, beef?
牛肉 牛肉 牛肉?
B-beef, beef, beef, beef?
牛 牛肉 牛肉 牛肉 牛肉?
Sorry about that dinner party last night.
昨天的聚会真是不好意思啊
It kind of got away from me a little bit.
我有点失控了
But I really appreciate you getting up early
你们能早起帮我把Oleg的东西运回去
and helping me move Oleg's stuff back.
我实在是太感激了
I just actually feel like this is a little bit my fault...
我只是觉得我也有错...
Seriously!
说真的!
Can it ever just be about me?
可以让我做焦点吗?
Hey, um,
嘿 唔
where are we taking his stuff anyway?
我们要把他的东西运到哪儿去?
I don't think goodwill will take a love seat
我觉得即使是好意 也无法接受
that's actually covered in love.
那张沾满爱♥液的性♥爱椅子
Well, I was thinking,
呃 我在想
you know, since Oleg and I
你们也知道 我和Oleg的关系
really did have something special,
确实不一般
I was thinking I would just take his stuff
所以我想着我♥干脆
and dump it down by the river.
把他的东西丢到河里得了
Okay, I'm just gonna say it...
好吧 我一定要说出来...
Sophie, would it kill you
Sophie 让Oleg把那幅破画
to just let Oleg hang the damn painting?
挂在墙上 会要了你的命吗?
So what, you just park the truck
天啊 你就这样
in the middle of the Van Wyck Expressway?
把货车停在高速公路上?
Do you never learn?
你就不能受点教训吗?
I almost ate Rent-A-Truck floor mat.
我差点连租车公司的地毯都吃下去了
Caroline, you get this straight...
Caroline 你把话说清楚...
Oleg was wrong.
是Oleg的错
And those nipples were way too big.
普京乳♥头实在是太大了
This is awkward.
太尴尬了
You're in the truck?
你在卡车里?
No, you're in my apartment.
不 是你在我的房间里
I think something hit us.
我觉得我们被撞了
You guys just need some couples therapy.
你们只是需要接受配偶治疗
I'll mediate it,
我来帮你们调解吧
since I've had therapy myself.
我曾经给自己做过治疗
Not as a couple, but hopefully someday.
虽然我没有另一半 但希望在未来有
I'm just sitting here waiting for the tow truck to come.
我只想坐在这等拖车
How's your neck, Max?
你的脖子还好吗 Max?
Not so bad.
还好
The second car that hit us kind of knocked
被第一辆车撞歪的脖子
what the first car knocked out of place back in place.
又被第二辆车给撞回原位了
I'll start.
我先来
This woman is a fraud and a liar.
这个女人就是一个骗子
Okay, well,
好吧 呃
we need a little more Oprah, a little less Jerry Springer.
要欧普拉式的真情 少点杰里·斯普林格式的讽刺
Hey, don't dis Springer.
嘿 别说杰里·斯普林格的坏话
They have great snacks in the green room.
他们的绿屋子里的零食很好吃
You were on Jerry Springer?
你上过杰里·斯普林格的节目?
Yeah, I was on "I hate my roommate
没错 我参加了"我讨厌我室友"
and I don't know how to tell her."
但不知道怎么告诉她"那期节目
Oleg and I are not gonna talk this thing out.
Oleg和我说不清楚的
If you want to waste your time,
如果你想浪费时间
go teach in an inner city high school.
就去市中心的中学教书吧
You know what? Even better...
你知道吗? 为了更有效地治疗
I'll do the talking for Oleg.
我来帮Oleg说话
Oh, then, Max... you be me, okay, Max?
哦 那么 Max... 你来帮我 好吗Max?
Oh... I don't know if...
呃... 我不知道是不是...
Do you want the rest of the beef, or not?
你还想不想要剩下的牛肉了?
This guy is a bum, and the painting has to go.
这个家伙是个混♥蛋 那些画应该被丢掉
It's stupid.
简直太蠢了
Really, really good, Max
非常 非常好 Max
but next time just arch your back a little, and, yeah.
但是下一次 你的腰得挺直 嗯 没错
Yeah.
好的
Okay, you be me.
好吧 你来当我
No, I don't feel like getting a threatening erection right now.
不 我不要受你勃起的老二威胁
But I will say, anytime people move in together,
但是 当人们住在一起时
it's a compromise.
就得相互妥协
Look at Max...
看看Max...
when I needed a place to stay, she let me have my horse.
当我需要安身之所 她还让我保留了自己的马
Let me just say... and I brought this up on Springer...
这么说吧 我在斯普林格的节目也这么说的
I only let you in because of the horse.
我是为了那匹马才让你住的
And I finally stopped putting up a fight
还有就是我终于不再反对
and let Max walk around naked.
同意让Max在街上裸奔
When did that happen?
这是什么时候的事?
Tomorrow.
明天
Oh, Oleg,
哦 Oleg
I wouldn't want you to give up walking around naked.
我不想阻止你在街上裸奔
I mean, as long as you don't sit down on anything white.
只要你别坐在白色的东西上面就行
Makes sense.
有道理
Nobody likes a chocolate starfish on an ottoman.
没人喜欢在椅子上留下个巧克力色的印迹
Point, Sophie.
Sophie得分
Ha! I'm winning, everybody!
哈! 我赢了 看见没!
Well, it's therapy.
呃 这是治疗性谈话
There are no winners and losers.
没有输赢
Sounds like something a loser would say.
听起来像是输家说的话
You know, Oleg,
你知道吗 Oleg
this isn't about that silly little painting.
这不是这些破画的问题
It's just, uh,
只是 呃
a lot of change in a short amount of time...
在这么短的时间里发生了这么多变化...
I'm so scared.
让我感到害怕
Sophie,
Sophie宝贝啊
I don't care about my stuff, as long as I have you.
只要有你 其他东西我都不在乎
What did we just do?
我们做了什么?
We had them apart, and now we just put them back together.
我们把他们分开 现在却又让他们在一起
You did that.
你的功劳
You don't know when to butt out.
你不知道在什么时候闭嘴
Jerry's words.
杰里说的