主厨的餐桌（2015）

但我心里想着
but in my head I was like,
"我不想要只做一个高级点心师
"I don't wanna just be a great pastry cook.`
我想成为这家餐厅里
I wanna be the best pastry
最棒的点心师"
cook that this restaurant's ever seen."
在一间餐厅里
In a restaurant, if you wanna show
如果你想要表明你是真的努力上进
that you're really serious about climbing the ranks,
你就得做些约定俗成的事
there are things that you just do.
你要来得比别人早
You show up earlier than
走得比别人晚
everyone else and leave later than everyone else.
你还得为员工餐出力
And you make something for family meal,
员工提前餐下午4点开饭 就在我们开门营业前
the pre-meal at 4:00 P.M. Before we fed our customers.
我第一天入职时
I either made brownies
会做布朗尼或者巧克力片曲奇饼
or chocolate chip cookies on the first day.
-这是我们做出的最棒的果酱配方 -不错
- This is the best jam we came up with. - Okay.
怀利走进厨房♥ 然后问我
Wylie comes into the kitchen and he says,
"这是你做的吗"
"Hey, did you make this?"
然后他会给出评价
And he would give me his assessment.
真的能尝出来
It does have that amazing canned
你在蓝莓派里加的一级蓝莓罐头
blueberry that you put into your blueberry pie.
是的
Yeah.
"你用什么方法让它中心保持这么绵软的"
"What did you do to get it to be this fudgy in the center?"
或是 "你觉得巧克力和黄油的比例是最佳吗"
Or, "Are you happy with the balance of chocolate to butter?"
每天他都在鞭策我
Every day was a day that he pushed me.
所以我们制订了一份每周菜单
So we started this routine where I'd make
像是我每周做一次巧克力片曲奇饼
a batch of chocolate chip cookies one day a week,
或是每周做一次英式松饼
I'd make a batch of English muffins one day a week,
然后他就会评判指点我的作品
and he would critique them with me.
难得的是这种经过滚筒干燥
What's hard is the flavor that you get of the blueberry
而别有一番风味的蓝莓
in the drum-dried
蘸着牛奶面包屑来吃是更奇妙的组合
is pretty magical when you eat it with the milk crumbs.
嗯 和冻干蓝莓比起来是这样
Yeah. Compared to the freeze-dried.
"你做的挺好吃的 你对自己的作品有什么感想
"These are pretty good. What do you think about 'em?
让我来讲讲我喜欢的英式松饼
Let me tell you what I like
应该具有哪些要素 我喜欢X，Y和Z"
in an English muffin. I like X, Y, and Z."
他会把英式松饼的每一部分细细拆开来讲
And he would pick apart every little part of an English muffin.
我也觉得滚筒风干的蓝莓更好吃
I thought that the drum-dried tasted better, too.
它有一种...
There's something when you...
有种魔力
It's magical.
好吃到让你想要闭上眼睛 深吸一口气
Makes you wanna close your eyes and take a deep breath.
直到我开始在wd~50餐厅工作
And it wasn't until I started working at wd~50
我对要如何烹饪食物的好奇心才真正出现
that my curiosity with how food is made really started to come.
好了
All right.
有次周日 我到了餐厅 正准备做员工餐
One Sunday, I came in, was gonna go make family meal,
我打开冰箱
and I open our fridge,
发现里面没什么可用的食材
and there's not really anything in the fridge.
我当时沉迷于阅读各地做馅饼的菜谱
I became obsessed with reading about pies from different regions,
正好看到了这款奶酪派
and reading about this chess pie,
是一款南方人食材不够的时候
this American dessert that they make down south
会做的一种美式甜点
when they don't really have anything left.
我很喜欢它的创作理念 因为那是个周日 我手边没什么食材
And I loved the idea of it, 'cause it's Sunday, I got nothing,
我得在材料不足的情况下凭空变出个派来
I need to make a pie with nothing to make a pie with.
所以我就决定着手做这种
And I decide that I'm gonna
加足黄油又甜又黏的馅料
make this buttery, gooey, sugary filling.
我舀了一盆
I grabbed some freeze-dried
用来做玉米冰淇淋的冻干玉米粉
corn that we were making cornbread ice cream with
倒进了馅料里
and I threw that in the filling.
说实话 我当时没去称各种材料的用量
Truth be told, I kind of didn't really measure anything.
我有点跟着感觉走
I was just kind of being very spiritual about the moment,
我一般做员工餐都是这样
which is oftentimes what I did when I baked for family meal,
因为之后的营业时间内要求精力太集中了
because the rest of the day was so precise.
对我而言 我只想展现自己的风格
For me, all I wanted to do was be myself,
但我还要做到让餐厅中的员工感受到我的风格
but I wanted to be myself in this community of people.
这算是种入会仪式
It's your rite of passage with them,
让他们感觉到你天赋异禀
for them to believe that you're talented,
让他们知道你懂什么叫美食
and for them to believe you know what good food tastes like.
我把派送入烤箱 但馅料一直没熟透
I baked the pie and the filling never quite set,
但是已经可以闻到香味了 我就想说
but it smelled really good, so I was like,
"好了 我得把派拿出来了
"All right, I need to pull this pie out.
再不拿出来要烤焦了"
It's gonna start burning if I don't."
然后我把派拿出来扔进了冰箱
So, I pull it out and I throw it in the freezer
希望馅料中心能冻结实了
in hopes that the filling, the center, will just set thick enough
不至于让我呈上个黏糊糊又难以下咽的派
that I'm not serving this atrocious, soupy pie.
员工餐桌上这东西怎么拿得出手
Like, you can't put that up for family meal.
员工餐刚开始几分钟
And a few minutes into family meal,
我就听见厨房♥里闹起来了
I start hearing these noises in the kitchen.
我的一个好朋友过来问
And one of my buddies is like,
"那边桌子上的那个派是你做的吗"
"Did you make that pie that's up there on the table?"
我就 "啊 别说了 我知道做的不好 挺烂的"
And I'm like, "Yeah, I know. It's not perfect, it's not awesome."
他就 "你去厨房♥看看
He's like, "You gotta go into the kitchen.
大家都疯了"
People are freaking out right now."
剩下的人每人拿了一块派
And the rest of these guys,
然后把派从他们眼前推开
they're taking a slice and they're pushing it away from them.
说着"我不能再吃了"
Like, "Do not let me have any more of that pie."
有个澳洲厨师说
And this Australian cook was like,
"我不知道你怎么做的
"I don't know what you just did,
但这个派全场最佳 应该叫火爆全场派"
but this pie is like crack. It's crack pie."
它成了我每周日必做的
It became this underground wd~50 family meal dessert
wd~50内部员工餐甜点
that I made on Sundays.
你好
Hey, how are you?
你好 你要吃点什么
Hi. What can I get you?
可以给我一个综合口味百吉饼配香葱奶油芝士吗
May I have an everything bagel with scallion cream cheese?
你想要烤一下吗
You want it toasted?
不要烤 加上培根和西红柿
Uh, not toasted. Um, bacon and tomato.
我曾经在wd~50工作
I was working at wd~50,
我在那里工作了不到两年的时间
and I had been there for just shy of two years,
发生了一些事情
and something happened where
我必须要不停地不停地努力
I had pushed and pushed and pushed and pushed.
接下来我唯一能做的事情就是
And the only other step I could
成为一名糕点师
take was the step to become the pastry chef,
但我却失去了兴趣
and I wasn't interested in it.
我曾经的梦想是搬到纽约 成为一名糕点师
The dream was to move to New York to become a pastry chef.
我真的知道那意味着什么吗 完全不知道
Did I really know what that meant? Um, no.
-非常感谢 -谢谢你
- Thank you very much. - Thank you.
去上厨师学校的时候
Going to culinary school,
他们会教你最炫酷的法国烹饪技巧
they teach you the fanciest of French techniques.
在布雷餐厅工作的时候 没有饼干
In working at Bouley, there's no cookies there.
什么都没有
That's not a thing.
当我放慢脚步开始思考的时候
And I think, when I slowed down,
我意识到 在一家令人难以置信的高端餐厅里
I realized that being the pastry chef
做糕点师不是我想做的事情
of an incredibly cutting-edge restaurant was just not who I was.
我努力地工作
I had worked my butt off.
我留在了纽约 一直没有离开
I stayed in New York. I never left.
很长时间以来 我错过了了婚礼 生日
I missed weddings and birthdays and births and holidays
庆生会 假期和其他所有东西
and everything for a very long time.
我记得自己非常希望
I remember wishing that I
有住在城里的家人和朋友
had friends or family that lived in the city.
生活非常孤独
It's a very solitary life.
开始的时候 我用工作来填补寂寞
Early on, I would fill that loneliness with work.
但是突然间我意识到这可能是
But at some point I realized that that is probably
人类能做到的最无聊 最平面化的模样
the most boring, one-dimensional thing a human being can be,
而我正在变成那个样子
and that I was becoming that.
当时 我处于一种
At that time, I was a little bit in a space
对未来十分困惑的状态之中
of not really knowing what my next step was.
当时我的空间非常狭小 我知道自己必须要放宽眼界
I was so zoomed in. I knew I needed to kind of zoom out.
因为我经常跟怀利说
Because I had poked and prodded Wylie
如果需要帮忙的话 就叫我去做兼♥职♥
to give me whatever side jobs that he needed help with,
我也曾经在卫♥生♥部♥门工作过
I had experience working with the health department.
有一天 他说 "我朋友需要帮助
And, one day, he said, "My buddy needs some help.
你能去他那儿看看要做什么吗
Do you mind going up there and just sussing it out?
我也不太清楚是什么事情"
I'm not really sure what's going on."