不良教育（2012）

It's my one-man Les Mis all over again.
这是我全新设计的
Er, Joe, maybe lose the flag -
Joe还是把旗丢掉吧
it makes you look a little bit National Fronty.
有点像国家集♥会♥
I'm already sorting out the press. Joe's my PA.
我已经整理出了新闻 Joe是我的助手
I've spoken to a man from the Watford Guardian.
我和一个卫报里的人说了
I want the nationals, babe.
我想要搞大
I'm offering the Mail Online photos of Chantelle in a bikini.
我还发了Chantelle比基尼的照片
Stephen, she's 16.
Stephen她才16岁
No, you're right, she's probably a bit old for the Sidebar of Shame.
也对 她对侧边栏来说有点老了
You know what would really grab their attention? A hunger strike.
你们知道怎么更吸引注意了吗？ 绝食罢♥工♥
Joe, you know the way you're on this vegan diet, which...
Joe 知道吗 你作为素食主义者
Isn't working. I miss bacon so much.
没用的 我好想念培根
Cheer up, Uncle Fester. Soon you'll be skinny
振作起来 很快你就会瘦下来
enough to buy your clothes from Jacamo.
你就能从Jacamo买♥♥衣服了
At least he don't get his threads from ASDA.
至少他没去阿斯达
Your mum get staff discount? She don't work at ASDA.
你妈有员工折扣吗？ - 她不在那上班
How she get a staff discount? Sucked off George?
她怎么得到员工折扣 给George来口♥活♥了？
Guys! Don't worry! Not YOUR George!
同学们 - 别担心 不是你那个George
Thanks. Er, look, Joe, my dad says that I'm a bad teacher
谢谢 Joe 我爸说我是不称职的老师
but who's going to look bad when doctors are force-feeding you
但是谁在你看上去很糟是关心你
through a tube because you love me so much?
因为你很爱我
Alfie, is this strike just about getting revenge on your dad?
Alfie 这个罢♥工♥就是为了报复你父亲吗？
No. A hunger strike's win-win, mate.
绝食罢♥工♥是双赢 伙计
The governors will cave the minute you start losing weight.
教育局会在意你失去的体重
How long will that be? I'm going Tenerife next Christmas. Listen, guys.
这要搞多久？圣诞节我要去特内里费岛 - 听着伙计们
Actions speak louder than words, Joe!
行动比言语更有说服力Joe
Rosa Parks, Tiananmen Square.
罗莎·帕克斯 天♥安♥门♥广场
Protesting the war in Vietnam, a monk set himself on fire.
越战抗♥议♥ 和尚自焚
Oh, good idea. I'll get the petrol - we've already got a monk.
好主意 我去找汽油 这有和尚了
Idiot!
白♥痴♥
Ah, thank God for Ying. Always thinking.
谢天谢地 Ying 什么都想到了
What if we light a real fire under my dad's ass?
要是真烧了我爸的屁♥股♥怎么办
Old health and safety's here to save the day.
旧工具在这保证安全的一天
I was thinking of throwing them off the roof. You've changed.
我想把他们从屋顶吹下来 - 你变了
"I rebel, therefore I exist." Camus.
我反叛,所以我存在 加缪
Anyone else finding that a bit annoying? Yep.
还有人听见那声音了吗 -有
I've got to go find Miss Gulliver - we're drawing up a list of demands.
我去找Gulliver老师 我们草拟要求列表
Beer at lunch! Unbelievable!
啤酒午餐 - 别想了
The reporter's here!
记者来了
Tits and teeth.
胸和牙齿
So, er, why'd you get expelled from your last school?
你是因为什么被上一个学校驱逐的？
I kidnapped a teacher. Really?
我绑♥架♥了老师 - 真的？
No, you salad! I'm not a psycho.
假的 蠢货 我又不是神经病
Called in a bomb threat to get out of some long division.
这是炸♥弹♥威胁排除法
Amazing.
牛叉
Pick up your lip.
收起你的下巴
Someone's in love!
有人恋爱了
Oh, shit, maybe I am.
操 说不定真是
Bollocks!
胡扯
You've taken a vow of silence?
你要沉默抗♥议♥？
OK, just let me know, by the way, if you don't want that foosball table.
好 告诉我 你要是不想要桌上足球的话
Seriously, just say the word.
真的 说出来就行
We're drawing up a list of demands.
我们草拟一个要求列表
We demand safe pensions.
我们要求有安全的生活津贴
Job security.
工作有保障
No more homework.
取消作业
I'm a lover, not a fighter, babe.
我是有爱人士 不是斗士
Like Ghandi.
就像甘地
Oh, totes. David Gandy's always been an inspiration.
绝对 大卫·甘迪（男模）一直给我灵感
Those abs - like a cobbled street.
那些像鹅卵石街道的腹肌
Wouldn't want to walk down them in a wedged heel.
不忍♥心把楔形鞋跟走上
That man with the nappy? Eww!
那人戴着尿布？呕
Oi, Dickers.
嗨 二货
I need your advice. I think I like Cleo - she's an absolute weldy.
我需要你的建议 我可能喜欢Cleo 他绝对是个巫婆
Really? I thought you and her had beef.
真的?我以为你俩有羁绊
Yeah, I... instantly regret using that word.
说完我就后悔了
No, I think I, like, LIKE-HER like her.
不是 我觉得就是喜欢的 那种喜欢
She thinks I'm a tool.
她认为我老是被人利用
Well, I mean, you kind of are.
看起来你也像
Look, mate, men like me and you -
伙计 像你我这样的人
we're never going to be able to get girls with our looks.
女生是不会正眼看我们的
What do you mean, men like me and you?
什么叫做像你我这样的？
I'm an absolute baller, mate, a nine out of ten.
我还是球员呢 伙计 十有八♥九♥
You look like a Topshop Peter Sutcliffe.
你就像是个便利店里的门童
Right. I mean, do you want my help?
行 你还想要我的建议吗?
Our only option is to make girls laugh. Women love a sense of humour.
我们只能做的就就是让女生笑 她们喜欢幽默感
Oh, I get it, I've got to laugh her into...
明白了 我要让她笑
A corner, yeah.
一方面
Laugh her straight into an impulsive flat-share
让她笑的完全停不下来
that binds her to you financially.
把她变成你的财产
Code red! They're sending in supply teachers!
红色警报 他们来了特派老师
Look at them - it's like the army of the unsullied invaded...
看看他们 就像入侵的军队
What's wrong with supply teachers?
特派老师怎么了
Well, put it this way -
看这水平样子
even I can get a permanent placement.
我都可以有永久的职位
Scab!
中出叛徒
Oh, my God! All we need is Julie Walters and it's Billy Elliott! Scab!
哦 天啊 我就需要Julie Walters和Billy Elliott 叛徒
Right, that's it, I'm taking this to the next level!
就这样 下一阶段就交给我了
Dirty protest.
肮脏的抗♥议♥
What? No!
什么 不是
I'm going to hit my dad where it hurts.
我要给我爸重重的一击
His car. Shit on his car!
他的车 - 在他车里拉屎
No, there's no shit.
不是 不要屎
Dickers, you been sniffing glue?
二货 你闻到胶水了
Shut up! What is all of this?
闭嘴 这些是怎么了
It's meant to be a strike, not a festival.
这是罢♥工♥ 不是节日
If we're here for the long haul, might as well have a laugh.
我们要是一直在这 不妨开怀大笑
Tomato? I'm going to pelt the supply teachers.
番茄要吗？ 我要去砸特派老师
Old school, slapstick! Cleo might like it.
旧学校 闹剧 Cleo 可能会喜欢
Salad for the salad.
废物配废人
Oi, Kelly Osbourne,
喂 大明星
want to see a couple of turnips that look like your mum's bollocks?
来看看这胡萝卜像你老妈的口胡
Can I have a tomato?
能给我个番茄吗
No, Joe, you're on hunger strike.
不行Joe你在绝食抗♥议♥
I'm so hungry. You're doing great, mate.
我饿死了 - 你做的很好 伙计
And remember, when everyone else is tucking into that delicious hog roast,
记住 当其他人都吃美味的烤猪
you, my friend, are going to be occupying the moral high ground.
你 我的朋友 要占领道德制高点
Hog roast?
烤猪吗?
Why, God?
为什么 老天爷
Look what those journo bastards did, sir!
看看那些混♥蛋♥记者 老师
I told them not to print my left side.
我告诉他们不要我左边的照片
I said, "Front on or three-quarter profile."
我说了 四分之三的脸部特写
They've given me fat neck!
他们给我拍出了粗脖子
Sorry... did you say all of these things?
这些都是你说的
I thought it was an interview, not a bloody quiz.
我以为是访谈 不是什么流血的测验
Mein Kampf was the name of John Barrowman's autobiography.
我的奋斗是John Barrowman自传的名字
You thought that Hitler's first name was Heil.
你以为希♥特♥勒♥的名是Heil
That Hezbollah and Hamas were chips and dips.
真♥主♥党和哈马斯是薯条和蘸酱
Well, they sound yummy.
听起来很好吃
When asked who said, "I have a dream," you responded...
问是谁说我有一个梦想 你回答...
Westlife.
西城男孩
I know, I know, that one was dumb.
我知道 我知道 那回答很蠢
Originally, it was ABBA.
最初是 瑞典的ABBA组合
Maybe we ARE stupid, sir. No, don't worry, Chantelle.
也许我们就是太笨了 - 别担心Chantelle
It's just some stupid journalist trying to spin a story out of nothing.
就是些愚蠢的记者胡编的故事
Is it? Miss Gulliver's class are revising. We're just pissing around.
是吗 Gulliver老师的班级在复习 我们在这只是瞎闹
Oi, who's nicked my porn?
谁偷了我的黄盘
I'm going to fail my exams.
我考试要不及格了
Who cares, babes?
谁在乎啊
I'm going to become a dancer and you'll be my make-up artist.
我要成为一个舞蹈家 你会是我的化妆师