美国之旅2（2021）

看来只是空穴来风
have turned out to be unfounded.
我看到幻象了
I seen it in a vision.
你有一个儿子
You gots a son.
是真的
It is true.
阿基姆 你有一个儿子
You have a son, Akeem.
私生子
A bastard son.
不可能
That is impossible.
我只跟莉莎一个女人上过床
The only woman I have ever lain with is Lisa.
父王
Father,
我没乱播我的皇种
I did not sow my royal oats.
塞米
Semmi!
快把真♥相♥告诉阿基姆
Tell Akeem the truth at once.
记得吗 那时在皇后区
Remember in Queens, night after night,
你夜复一夜寻找你的完美女人
you were looking for the perfect woman?
记得
Yes.
我也…
Well, I too was--
该怎麽说呢
how can I say this?
我也在寻找我的完美阴♥道♥
I was looking for the perfect vagina.
只要阴♥道♥都行
Or any vagina.
我们找遍那座令人厌恶的城市
We scoured the far reaches of that loathsome city,
遍寻不着你的梦中情人
searching rather unsuccessfully for the woman of your dreams.
我叫蜜桃 我好棒棒
? My name is Peaches, and I'm the best ?
每个DJ都想摸我胸部
? All the DJs want to feel my breast. ?
我看你看了一整个晚上
I've been watching you all evening,
我要把你扒个精光
and I want to tear you apart.
还有你的朋友
And your friend, too.
我去找人聊聊
I am going to mingle.
我实在是受够了 我领悟到
I had had enough. And I realized,
如果我想在美国土地上播种
if I was ever going to sow my oats on American soil,
就得找个人来照顾你
I was going to need to find someone to take care of you.
不过别担心
But don't worry, I never broke our oath
我从没违背誓言泄漏我们的身分
of keeping our identity a secret.
王子
A prince?
对 王子
Yes, a prince.
但不能让他知道你知道
But he cannot know that you know who he is.
我们是非洲卧底
-We are undercover Africans.
非洲卧底 好样的 帅哥
Africans undercover. Oh, that's good, baby.
想把妹弄上♥床♥没必要骗人
You ain't got to lie like that to get some of this ass. But you know what?
我来跟你哥们打一炮
I'll bump uglies with your homeboy.
我先去吐一下
Just let me go throw up real quick, and, uh...
然後就来办正事
and then we can, you know, get it crackin'.
我当时脑袋可能不太清楚
I may not have been thinking straight.
我是有苦衷的
In my defense,
我好几个礼拜没被皇家浴女服侍了
it had been weeks since the last time I was tended to by the royal bathers.
不过在当时 这计画感觉还不赖
But at the time, it seemed like a good plan.
希望你喜欢南瓜派
I hope you like, uh, pumpkin pie.
因为你有一整片可以吃
'Cause you gonna get a whole slice.
才不是这样 父王
That is not what happened, Father.
我记得见过这个道德沦丧的女人
I remember meeting this morally bereft woman,
但没有任何不恰当的交♥配♥动作
but there was no inappropriate mating.
她跟我分享了她的节庆香草
She offered me some of her ceremonial herbs.
小王子
Princey.
然後 没记错的话
And then, if memory serves,
有只野猪冲了进来
a wild boar burst into the room.
跳到我腿上
It came and jumped into my lap.
开始狂撞我
And then it began to ram me.
一直撞…
-And ram me and ram me, ramming and ramming!
然後一股臭味…
And a foul...
你这白♥痴♥ 你对我♥干♥了什麽好事
You fool, what have you done to me?!
–动手 儿子 杀了他 –宰了他
-Go on, son. -Just kill him. -Kill him!
–所以我其实有个儿子 –私生子
-So I actually have a son? -A bastard son.
为什麽瞒着我这麽多年
Why was his existence hidden from me all these years?
我本来希望你可以合法生下男嗣
I was hoping you would put a stem on an apple of your own.
皇室画家画下了我的幻象
The royal artist made a sketch of my vision.
这就是你的私生子
This is your bastard.
阿基姆王子 听我说 伊齐将军
Hear me, Prince Akeem.
他会趁我们伟大的国王驾崩时
General Izzi, he will use the passing of our great king
出兵攻击相对弱者
as a sign to attack the weak one.
相对弱者
The weak one?
是在说我吗
Am I the weak one?
是我把你宠坏了 我儿
I spoiled you, my son.
你不像我这般强大无敌、残酷无情
You are not strong or ruthless as I am.
你会遭到刺杀
You will be assassinated.
不到一个礼拜
Within a week.
顶多一个月
Month, tops.
阿基姆王子
Prince Akeem,
跟着雷鸟走
follow the thunderbird.
牠会带你找到你的儿子
It will take you to your boy.
跟着雷鸟走
Follow the thunderbird?
太夸张了
This is madness.
要是被我老婆小孩知道…
If my family were to ever find out about this...
你会没事的
You will be safe.
我国人♥民♥会没事的
Our people will be safe.
这是唯一的办法
It is the only way.
你一定要…
You must.
父王 别激动
Easy, my father.
大限将至
The end is near.
我的葬礼一定要够壮观
My funeral...should be spectacular.
现在就来办吧
Yeah, it will, Papa.
趁我还有一口气
Let's have it now while I'm alive.
绝对办得隆重盛大
It shall be glorious.
起初之初 宇宙之始
In the beginning, the universe began.
恒星、行星 宇宙间万物
Stars, planets, all the visible objects
只为了一个目的而存在
in the universe came to be with a single purpose:
为那最伟大的造物开路
to prepare the way for the grandest creation of all,
那就是
the birth
贾菲乔佛诞生
of Jaffe Joffer.
然而今日
But today,
我们齐聚片刻
we gather for a moment or two
将我们的敬意
to give much respect due
献给这位改变世界的国王
to the king who made a difference in our world.
萨慕达人♥民♥
Zamundans,
隆重欢迎
I give you...
风尚合唱团
En Vogue.
耶
Yeah, ooh
好个国王…好个了不起的国王
? What a king What a king, what a king What a mighty good king ?
我再说一遍
? I'm-a say it again now ?
好个国王…好个了不起的国王
? What a king, what a king, what a king What a mighty good king ?
他是个了不起的好国王
? He's a mighty, mighty good king... ?
接下来 欢迎Salt N Pepa
And now... Salt-N-Pepa!
圆滑直逼欧巴马 嗓音低沉好迷人
? My king is smooth like Barack, but his voice got bass ?
麦可B乔丹的身 丹佐华盛顿的脸
? A Michael B. body with a Denzel face ?
饶舌大神的巧 钞票上都是他的脸
? Boss moves like Hov, face on his own money ?
名声响当当 国家就靠他
? He's good in every hood, and he's got his own country ?
每次看到他 整个超可口
? He lookin' like a meal every time I see him ?
万人迷兼领导人 没有国王能像他
? A lover and a leader, other kings couldn't be him ?
就算穿着牛仔裤 一样是华衣教父
? He dresses like a dapper don, but even in jeans ?
好个天赐神物 我的梦幻国王
? He's a godsent original, the king of my dreams ?
好个国王
-? Yeah, ooh ? -? What a king ?
好个国王…好个了不起的国王
? What a king, what a king, what a king What a mighty good king ?
了不起…
? So good, so good, so good ?
好个国王…好个了不起的国王
? What a king, what a king, what a king What a mighty good king. ?
随着这位伟大国王的逝去
With the passing of the great king,
我们的世界将从此改变
the world changed forever.
他走後
When he died,
再也不会有笑声
no one ever smiled again.
假期被取消了
Vacations were canceled.
节日被遗忘了
Holidays ignored.
他走了
? He's leaving... ?
人们甚至不再做♥爱♥
People didn't even have sex anymore.