拯救地球（2025）

没有法律体系
There is no legal system.
没有国会
There's no Congress.
没有美国
There is no America.
没有全球民♥主♥秩序 好吗
There's no global democratic order, okay?
所以别把我当白♥痴♥一样跟我说话
So don't talk to me like I'm a dipshit,
因为我不是白♥痴♥
because I'm not a dipshit.
我是一个知道他妈发生了什么的人
I'm a guy that knows what the fuck is happening,
而你不会打败我的 你这恶心的仙女座混♥蛋♥
and you will not defeat me, you sick Andromedan fuck!
泰迪 对不起
Teddy, I'm sorry.
你需要帮助
You need help.
你精神有问题
You're mentally ill.
一开始每个人都否认
Everybody denies it at first...
然后他们就会招供
and then they confess.
他妈
Fucking...
他妈的 操 他妈的谎言
Fucking fuck! Fucking lie!
操
Fuck!
操
Fuck!
我不是独自发现它们的
I didn't discover them on my own.
我站在巨人的肩膀上
I stand on the shoulders of giants.
PA-99-N2微引力透镜事件
The PA-99-N2 microlensing event
证明了存在系外行星
proved that there was an exoplanet.
Gideon55在YouTube上对仙女座渗透的研究
And Gideon55's YouTube studies into Andromedan infiltration
为我的研究铺平了道路
paved the way for my own research.
但发现如何识别它们的人
But I was the one who discovered
是我 好吗
how to identify them, okay?
我创造了那些内容
I created that content.
显然 我以前从未登上过那艘飞船
Obviously, I've never been on the ship before,
但我的知识足以在笔记本电脑上渲染它
but I know enough to render it on my laptop.
去那里的旅程将是瞬间的
The journey there will be instantaneous.
但一旦我们登上飞船
But once we're on board,
进入它们的化学大气层内
inside their chemical atmosphere,
它们也许能听到我们的思想
they may be able to hear our thoughts,
所以在谈判期间保持头脑清晰果断
so keep your mind clear and decisive
在谈判桌上周♥旋♥的时候
during the negotiations.
它们会看到我们是荣誉和尊严之人
They will see that we are men of honor and dignity
地球拥有巨量的资源和人类的聪明才智
and that Earth, with its vast resources and human ingenuity,
有很多我们可以提供的东西
has much that we can offer.
可比这废物一样的死亡漩涡有价值多了
So much more than this fucking worthless death spiral
陷入混乱和屎要好
into chaos and shit.
如果它们不听道理
And if they won't listen to reason,
呃 我也有应对计划
well, I have a plan for that, too.
我们在太空的生活会是什么样子
What will our lives be like in space?
在太空
In space?
我们不是要住在太空吗
Aren't we going to live in space?
呃 兄弟 呃
Well, bud, uh...
我们只会离开几个小时
we'll only be gone for a few hours.
我们不是要永远离开地球
We're not leaving Earth for good.
我们在拯救它
We're saving it.
所以我们必须留在这里
So we have to stay here?
呃 是的 当然
Well, yeah. Of course.
但我们在拯救它
But we're saving it,
所以它会再次成为一个适合居住的好地方
so it'll be a good place to live again.
所以 一切都会好起来的
So, everything will be okay.
是的 我知道
Yeah. I know.
抱歉
Sorry.
没关系 兄弟
It's okay, man.
自从你给我打了那些针之后
Ever since those shots you gave me...
我就感觉很奇怪
...I've felt weird
和疯狂
and crazy
有时还很悲伤
and sometimes sad.
你也有这种感觉吗
Have you felt that way, too?
会过去的 别担心
It'll pass. Don't worry.
啊
Ah.
会过去的
It'll pass.
早上好
Good morning.
你上气不接下气的
You're out of breath.
哦 是的
Oh, yes.
你 呃
You, um...
你让我紧张
you make me nervous.
呃 所以 我 我一直在深思
Um, so, I've-I've been doing a lot of pondering,
我想我们应该重新开始
and I think we should start over.
我想帮助你
I want to help you.
鉴于此
And given that,
有件事我本该早点告诉你
there is something that I should have said to you earlier
我现在终于准备好
that I am finally prepared to say to you now
带着信念说出来
with conviction.
我是外星人
I am an alien.
我承认
I admit it.
你一直都是对的
You were right all along.
我是外星人
I am an alien.
我的意思是 你不能怪我试图隐瞒
I mean, you can't blame me for trying to conceal it
这么久 我
for as long as I did. I...
我在地球上的部分任务
Part of my mission here on Earth
是融入等等 所以
is to blend in and so forth, so...
听着 我很累
Look, I'm very tired.
我知道这听起来
And I know that this doesn't...
不那么有力
sound as forceful
或者逼真度没有达到
or the verisimilitude is not
你想要的那么高 necessarily
what you would want it to be, necessarily,
但我可以向您保证我言出必行
but I can assure you I mean what I say.
我想现在推进到解决方案
And I would like to move forward now to a solution.
我是外星人
I'm an alien.
你想重新开始
You want to start over?
是的
Yes.
好的
Good.
让我们重新开始
Let's start over.
我本希望我们能就你的种类达成一致
I was hoping we could agree on your genus
避免痛苦的测试 但你逼我出手
and avoid a painful test, but you forced my hand.
我 我承认了
I-I admitted it.
好吗
Okay?
我承认了 我很抱歉
I admitted it. I'm sorry.
我是个人道的人 我 我不想这样做
I'm a humane person. I-I do not want to do this.
我是外星人
I'm an alien.
我是外星人
I am an alien!
我是 我同意
I am... I agree.
呃 你确定这有效吗
Uh, are you sure it works?
她已经承认了
She already admitted it.
她杀了我们的家人 老表
It killed our family, cuzzie.
是的 但是
Yeah, but...
这似乎不对
this doesn't seem right.
请停下 拜托 拜托
Please stop. Please, please.
不要 不要
Don't. Don't.
不要 不要 不要这样做 不要这样做
Don't, don't, don't do this. Don't do this.
好的 第一波来了
Okay, here comes the first wave.
不 不 不 不 不 不 不 不 不 不
No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no.
不 不 不
No, no, no...
请不要
Please don't.
相信我 唐 相信我
Trust me, Don. Trust me.
第二波
Second wave.
泰迪 不要
Teddy, no!
你会杀了她的 泰迪
You'll kill her, Teddy!
你能停下吗
Can you stop?
泰迪 停下
Teddy, stop!
唐尼 退后
Donny, back up!
抱歉
Sorry.
搞什么鬼
What the fuck?
够了
That's enough!
你怎么了 兄弟
What's wrong with you, man?
她可能会死的
She could've died.
不 不 唐 你不明白
No. No, Don, you don't understand.