烛台背后（2013）

我要在圣诞假期过后才开工
I'm not working after Thanksgiving
尤其不是现在
during the holidays. Especially now.
可是节假日演出费用可以双倍啊
But you can make double on holiday shows.
你迟点再休假
Take a vacation later.
西摩 我不要
Seymour, I do not want to be
成为坟墓里最有钱的钢琴家了
the richest piano player in the grave.
不要想了 不，绝对不
Forget it. No, definitely not.
你已经工作过量了
You're already working too hard.
李，把电♥话♥给斯科特 我有一个问题要问他
Lee, give the phone to Scott. I have a question for him.
嘿，西摩
Hey, Seymour.
嘿，斯科特
Hey, Scott.
你干嘛不少他妈插手我的事情？
Why don't you stay out of my fucking business?
现在把话筒给李
Now give me back to Lee.
嗯哼 好吧
hmm. Okay.
不，你明天不能来吃晚餐
No, you cannot come for dinner tomorrow night.
我要做猪肉
I'm making pork.
好吧 再见
Okay. Byebye.
你拒绝他来吃晚餐 会不会有点冒犯他？
Doesn't he get insulted when you don't invite him over for dinner?
我挣的每块钱他都抽10%
He gets 10% of every dollar I earn.
我不需要带他吃晚饭了
I don't have to take him out for dinner.
我也不想其他人的陪伴
And I don't want any company.
我要我的金发阿多尼斯 整个属于我(希腊神话中的美男)
I want my blond Adonis all to myself.
噢，该死！
Oh, shit!
妈的，该死，该死！
Shit, shit, shit!
"哈森秀"！ 哦，快点！快点！
Carson! Oh, hurry! Hurry!
错过我的表演了吗？
Have we missed my performance?
哦 啧
Oh. Tsk.
我的上帝，我看着就像我父亲！
Oh, my Christ! I look like my father!
我看着就像我父亲穿了变装！
I look like my father in drag!
我看着就像我父亲在演"最毒妇人心"(60年代主妇惊悚片)！
I look like my father in "Hush, Hush, Sweet Charlotte"!
我建议做整个的面部拉皮
I would say a full face lift
植入硅胶 防止嘴唇周围的褶皱
with silicone implants to prevent the return
卷土重来
of the lines around the mouth.
我的个人感觉？
My feeling?
干嘛浪费那么多功夫和金钱..
Why go through all of the work and the money
假如一年后它们又全部掉落呢？
just to have it all fall down within a year?
你付了一大笔钱，就该让它持久
You pay good money, it should last.
有的医生会让你不断回来
Some of these doctors, they keep you coming back
不断扔钱
and paying, time after time.
我不相信这套 你说得对
I don't believe in it. No, you're right.
我很久前就做过这种手术，
You know, I had all this done a while ago,
但我觉得他的水平不如你
but I don't think he was as good as you are.
我建议做完拉皮后
I'm going to recommend a deep face peel
再做面部刮皮
after the face lift.
你的样子会美翻了！
You're going to look fabulous!
会和斯科特一样年轻
You'll look as young as Scott here.
哦，谢谢！ 我感觉好多了
Oh, thank you! I feel so much better.
那个"卡森秀"让我就像看到了
I mean, that Carson show was like looking
道林·格雷在公共中枯萎
at Dorian Gray wither away in public.
那媒体怎么办？
But what about the press?
我们怎么做到保密？
How do we keep this a secret?
我们匿名给你租下一套全部装♥修♥好的公♥寓♥
We rent you a fully furnished apartment under an alias
在绷带拆掉前
until the bandages come off.
没有人会知道
No one will know.
之后 你可以随便怎么说了
After that, you can recuperate as you like.
杰克，我希望 我能早点认识你
Jack, I wish I'd met you sooner.
那样我就有自己的电影生涯了！
I would still have had a movie career!
这是我真正的梦想 成为电影明星
That was my real dream to be a movie star.
那么，杰克，我想跟你谈谈
Now, Jack, I want to talk to you
为斯科特也做一些手术的事情
about doing some surgery on Scott here.
什么？
What?
好啊
Fine.
你想要我对斯科特做什么？
What would you like me to do with Scott?
我想你把斯科特整容成这样
I want you to make Scott look like this.
可以做到这一点吗？
Can you do that?
哦，我明白了
Oh, I see.
好的，我想我应该能做到你想要的
Yes, I think I can do what you want.
他的鼻子要整形
He's going to need a nose job.
我会重塑他的颧骨和下巴
And I'm going to have to restructure his cheekbones
需要植入一些东西
and his chin with silicone implants,
但不是 不可能
but it's not impossible.
但首先我们必须得让他他苗条下来！
But first we have to slim him down!
我有超好的瘦身法，加利福尼亚瘦身法
I have a terrific diet. The California Diet.
保证4周内减掉15磅
Guaranteed loss of 15 pounds in four weeks.
你♥他♥妈♥跟我开玩笑吗？
Are you fucking kidding me?
他肯花钱让你变得更苗条 更漂亮 更年轻
The man wants to spend money to make you thinner, prettier,and younger
而你不打算去做？
and you are thinking about not doing it.
可我很年轻
But I am young.
亲爱的，按同志年计算，你已经到了
Honey, in gay years, you're Judy
朱迪·加兰的更年期了
during the Sid Luft obese period.
真的吗？
Really?
可他们说话的方式就好像我不在场一样
They were talking about me like I wasn't even there.
假如李得不到他想要的，你确实就不会在场了
If Lee doesn't get what he wants, you won't be.
我想我是感到受宠若惊
Well, I guess I should be flattered,
他希望我长得跟他相似
him wanting me to look like him.
模仿是最高形式的致敬
Imitation's the highest form.
变装皇后诞生时，他们就这么跟她们说的
That's what they tell drag queens when they're born.
我不知道，伙计
Oh, I don't know, man.
我是说 假如我照镜子都认不出自己来
I mean, won't it be weird looking in a mirror
这难道不诡异吗？
and not recognizing myself?
我们该开福特野马还是雪佛兰？
Should we take the Auburn or the Camaro?
我就是不明白为什么手术过程中
I just don't understand why I cannot keep my hair on
不能戴假发
during the procedure.
如果我死了 我希望你先进来
If I die, I want you to get in here
哪怕跟护士大打出手
I don't care if you have to slap it on with Elmer's
也要在其他人看到我前给我戴上
before anybody sees me.
你不会死的
You're not going to die.
你恢复的实在太好了 李！
Oh, you are doing so well, Lee!
他是不是做得很好？
Isn't he doing well?
看了是时候该轮到你了？
I guess it's time to get started on you, huh?
首先，我们要解决一下这个体重
First, we're going to do something about that weight.
加利福利亚瘦身法
The California Diet.
这些赘肉会轻松掉落！
Those pounds will just fall off!
你现在看着很年轻
You look, easily, right now
就像一个男人刚过四十岁
like a man in his mid40s.
我可以闭上眼睛吗？
Will I be able to close my eyes?
不可以
Not entirely.
但这样一来，你就可以瞅见
But this way, you'll always be able to see people's expressions
人们看到靓丽的你的表情了
when they see how fabulous you look.
亲爱的，你在打鼾
Sweetie, you're snoring.
李！
Lee!
亲爱的，你在打鼾
Sweetie, you're snoring.
啊 看看你！
Oh, look at you!
我的阿多尼斯回来了 真的吗？
My Adonis is coming back. Really?
来我这儿
Come here.
这些是干嘛用的？
What are these for?
术后调理
Post surgery.
好吧，但我还是继续加利福利亚瘦身对吗？
Okay, but I stay on the California Diet?
绝对安全
Perfectly safe.
只要接着服用这些
Just keep taking those.
里面有一个
And one of these is a prescription
是我开给自己的特别瘦身药
for my own special diet pill.
对了 我还想我的下巴有个小窝
Uh, I want a dimple on my chin.
斯科特，李的下巴没有小窝
Scott, Lee doesn't have a dimple on his chin.
我知道，可是
I know, but
你知道的，为了让我的脸
You know, it's my face.
不用太深，只要浅浅的一个
Not too deep, just a little one.
好吧
Okay.
你觉得李会生气吗？
You think Lee'll be mad?
睡个好觉，我的宝贝男孩
Sleep tight, my baby boy.