中产家庭（2009）

The Middle S09E05

Part 4 Feb. 3, 2021, 10:24 a.m.

我不想负责准备周年纪念
I don't like being in charge of anniversaries
到最后还总是让你失望
that always end up disappointing you anyway.
我再也不想这么做了!
I don't want to do it anymore!
你真可怜啊
Oh, poor you.
我知道这么多年来你穿过走廊
I know what a hardship it's been all these years
让Sue帮你做这些事是有多困难啊!
walking across the hall, getting Sue to do it!
被你戳穿了!
Oh, you got me!
我不擅长策划派对
I'm not a party planner.
我觉得我在家里做了很多其他事
Well, I think I do plenty of other things around here
功劳早就盖过这个不足了
that more than make up for it.
- 你有吗? - 当然
- Oh, do you? - Yeah.
比你干的事多多了
A hell of a lot more than you.
Mike 这不是在比赛
It's not a contest, Mike.
人们觉得自己快输了的时候
That's what people always say
也总是这么说
when they know they're losing.
我很抱歉!
Oh, I'm sorry!
你在家里做了很多事
You do a lot of things around here.
是我忘记了
I forgot.
你会把东西塞进去
You plug things in.
所以你只会塞东西
So that leaves you plugging
而我 -- 做了剩下的所有事!
and me -- everything else!
你留在沙发上的屁♥股♥印可不是这么说的
Your, uh, butt imprint on the couch says otherwise.
我的旁边就是你的大屁♥股♥印
Yeah, your big imprint is right next to it.
我这么给你说吧
Okay, well, I'll tell you what?
没关系的
That's fine.
不如这样既然你不满意
How about, since you don't appreciate
我在家里所做的一切
what I do around here,
我今后什么活也不干了!
I won't be doing it anymore!
饶了我吧
Oh, give me a break.
才不
Nope.
我不会给你的电♥话♥插上插头
I'm not plugging in your phone,
我不会再管你的电量够不够用
I'm not worrying about your battery.
看这个我给你买♥♥的刮冰器
Look at this ice scraper I got for you
想着天气变冷了放你后车厢里备用?
to put in your trunk cause it's getting cold?
现在是我的了!
Mine now!
看到我给你买♥♥的这些东西了吗?
You see this stuff I got for you?
现在都是我的了
It's coming with me.
我要召开一个紧急子女会议
Okay, guys, I'm calling an emergency kid meeting.
子女会议是什么?
Wait, what's a kid meeting?
家庭会议衍生而来的
It's an offshoot of a family meeting.
很显然我们需要为这些会议
Okay, clearly, we need to lock down
制定一些规则
some bylaws for these meeting,
因为Sue现在醉心于权力了
'cause Sue is drunk with power.
你们两个! 这很重要!
Guys! This is important!
没听见妈妈和爸爸的说话声吗?
Do you not hear Mom and Dad?
他们在吵架
They're fighting.
而且还是在银婚纪念日吵架!
On their silver anniversary!
你们应该站出来做点什么
You two need to step in and do something.
- 什么? - 啥?
- What? - Huh?
不能由我来出面
Well, I can't do it.
我不再充当家里面和事佬的角色了
It's not my role to be peacemaker anymore.
你不再当和事佬了是吧?
Oh, you're not playing your role anymore, hmm?
也许我也不该继续扮演我的角色了
Well, maybe I shouldn't play mine, either.
我当然能走进去
Sure, I could go in there
用我的轻浮来调节气氛
and lighten the mood with my levity
让老妈老爸重归于好
and bring Mom and Dad back together,
但是说不定他们的婚姻只能坚持25年
but, hey, maybe 25 years is all they got in them.
何必为了注定失败的事浪费我的魅力呢?
Why waste my charm on a lost cause?
不不不我知道你的把戏
No, no, no. I know what you're doing.
你以为只要你够顽固
You think if you're stubborn enough,
我就会像以前一样动摇
I'll crumble like I always do,
但是这次我很坚定!
but I mean it this time!
你笑什么?
What are you laughing at?
不告诉你 Sue
Oh, can't say, Sue,
因为我已不再是娱乐众人的角色了
because I'm not playing the entertainer anymore.
实在太可惜了
It's too bad, too,
因为我刚想到但没说出口的梗
'cause the thing I just thought of that I'm not saying
是有史以来最搞笑的恶心你的段子
is the funniest sick burn on you ever.
告诉我吧! 是说我丑陋的脸?
Come on! Is it about my ugly face?
把我比作动物? 我油腻的头皮?
Comparing me to an animal? My greasy scalp?
凌乱的腿毛?
My unruly leg hair?
不会是什么跟笨蛋奶酪押韵的东西吧?
Something that rhymes with dorkcheese?
蛋黄酱... 都归我!
Mayo... all mine!
不好意思打断你们了只是想来拿一支记号♥笔
Sorry, to interrupt, just need to grab a Sharpie.
Axl不肯告诉我他想到了什么损我的梗!
You guys, Axl won't tell me what insults he has for me!
Axl 别再折磨你妹妹了告诉她你想到的损话
Axl, stop torturing your sister and tell her your insult!
我在忙!
I am busy!
我要把"Heck的品牌啤葡萄酒"
I am changing Heck's brand Bwine
改成"嗨感"牌
to H-E-X.
我的成功不会再
This family will no longer
跟这个家有任何关系
be associated with my success.
你们不要再妄想靠我提携
You guys are done riding my coat tails.
而且 "嗨感"看起来像"性感"
And besides, "Hex" Looks like "Sex"
这噱头能促进销量
and sex sells.
商科专业的嘛就是停不下来
Business major. Can't turn it off.
不管你包装得再性感
Well, you can sex it up all you want,
也没人会买♥♥那个垃圾玩意
but nobody's gonna buy that crap.
我以为你喜欢喝呢
I thought you liked it.
不喜欢只是想友善点而已以后不会了!
Nope. Just being nice. Not anymore!
好吧
Well, fine.
好好享受远离
Then enjoy weaning yourselves
天才的我的滋味
off the teat that is my awesomeness.
因为从现在起你们闪亮而耀眼的明星
'Cause from on, your bright and shining star
将会变得平平无奇
is gonna be plain and boring.
就跟Brick一样
You know, like Brick.
这是什么声音? Brick 别吹了!
What the hell is that? Brick, stop it!
不好意思我才不会停下来
I'm sorry, I will not be stopping.
从我听到的话来看
From what I'm hearing,
我们都不再受自己固有角色的束缚了
we're all gonna be unshackled from our roles.
因此我不再满足于
Therefore, I am no longer content
坐在阴影中
to sit in the shadows.
我想要关注... 很多关注
I want attention... and a lot of it.
你是从哪里找来的这个乐器?
Where'd you get that thing?
在我寻求异性伙伴的过程中
In my quest for female companionship,
我加入了管弦乐团
I joined the orchestra.
其实我一周前就加入了但是没人有空来关心
I actually joined a week ago, but no one bothered to ask
我为什么放学后还在学校呆到那么晚
why I've been staying late after school.
这一切都快要改变了
But that's all about to change.
我等不及要分享
I can't wait to share
我在管弦乐团经历的一切好玩的事
every fascinating detail of orchestra.
而且我有一个...
And I have a...
别说出来!
Don't say it!
我一定要说
Oh, I'm saying it.
我下周有一个音乐会
A concert next week,
我希望你们都能到场!
and I expect you all to be there!
我有很多需求我希望你们能满足我
I have a lot of needs, and I expect them to be met.
告诉我这首曲子听着像什么
Tell me what song this sounds like.
Brick 对不起
Brick, sorry,
但是如果你是在寻求鼓励
but if you're looking for encouragement,
你得在你得内心深处进行挖掘
you're gonna have to dig down deep inside yourself
来找到继续的勇气
to find the will to go on,
因为你妈已经放弃充当活跃气氛的"拉拉队长"了
'cause your mom is out of the cheerleading business.
爸爸? 你打断了我的话
Uh, Dad? You're interrupting me.
- 我觉得你不应该打... - 好了真是荒唐
- I don't think you should be interru... - Okay, this is ridiculous.
- 我呼吁再召开一次家庭会议 - 不行!
- I'm calling another family meeting. - No!
禁止你组织召开任何会议!
You are forbidden from calling any more meetings!
而且整件事从一开始就是你的错
Besides, this whole thing is your fault in the first place.
为自己出头是我的错!
Oh, excuse me for standing up for myself!
我错在没有当一个好说话的老二!
For not being a pushover middle child!
我错在生命中就自私了这么一次!
For being selfish for once in my life!