老娘还没死（2023）

不敢相信她那时还灌个不停
I couldn't believe she was still chugging.
不敢相信她还能站着
I couldn't believe she was still standing.
什么事那么好笑 我也喜欢欢乐的恶作剧
What's funny? You know I enjoy a mirthful shenanigan.
只是我们昨晚和奈儿出去喝酒 情况有点失控
We just went out drinking with Nell last night, and things got a little crazy.
奈儿喝了传说中的终极长岛特调
Nell did the legendary "Longest Island."
酒保把大家喝剩的酒倒在一起
It's when the bartender combined all the remains of other peoples' drinks
然后奈儿全部干掉
and Nell chugged it.
真厉害
Charming.
我很高兴你们昨晚玩得很开心
Well, I'm just so happy to hear that you all had a fun night.
抱歉没邀请你 我们只是一时兴起 决定出去瞎闹
I'm sorry we didn't invite you. It was just kind of a spur-of-the-moment, fun kind of thing.
未来可以邀我 我也可以瞎闹
I mean, for future reference, I, too, am fun.
毕竟我这人非常有趣
I mean, I can be very fun.
你 我很有趣吧
You! Aren't I fun?!
超级有趣 老板 没人比得上你
So fun, boss. No one's as fun as you.
看到没 他同意了
See? He agrees.
这就是奈儿有点迟到的原因吗 因为她宿醉
So, is that why Nell's a little late? Is she hungover?
这有什么好笑的
Well, what's funny now?
不 奈儿绝对不会宿醉
Uh, no, Nell doesn't really get hungover.
对 她就像金刚狼
No, she's like Wolverine, except for the only part of her
只是她身上无坚不摧的部位是肝脏
that's indestructible is her liver.
老天爷啊
Ah. Ah. Oh, my word.
嗨
Hey.
亲爱的 你还好吗
Babe, you okay?
我感冒了 鼻涕多到不行
Uh, I got a cold. I'm more mucus than woman.
因为喝了讨人厌陌生人喝剩的饮料吗 我还真惊讶
Oh, after drinking the remnants of revolting strangers. Shocking.
姐妹 就请假吧
Girl, just take the day off.
不行 我必须写完那个诗人的讣闻
No, no, I gotta do that poet's obituary.
讣闻 太平间的要闻
- Obituary. - Words for the mortuary.
树木塑像 雕像 我们都只是孤身一人
Topiary, statuary. We are but solitary.
真的 我必须马上写完
Yeah, like, I need to finish it immediately.
奈儿 我是你的老板 我坚持要你回家休息
Nell, as your boss, I must insist that you go away
把恶心的东西留在自己家里
and be disgusting in your own home.
家 由木头和灰泥构成的虚假避风港 脆弱不堪的安全假象
Home! False haven of wood and plaster. Membrane-thin illusion of security.
好吧 大家再见
- Okay. Bye, guys. - Bye.
-再见 -再见
- Bye. - Bye.
-不要碰 -不...
- Oh, don't. - Don't touch it!
抱歉
Sorry.
(还不快乐 还没准备好 还没结婚 还无法活得自♥由♥自在)
(还没有成就感 还没成功 还没赚大钱 还没了却遗憾)
(还没长大)
老娘还没死
第一季第十集[本季终]
女子阴沉 身边尽是孤独生活的人造物品
Gloomy woman surrounded by artifacts of a lonely life.
可以闭嘴吗 我快写完你的讣闻了
Do you mind? I'm almost finished with your obituary, so...
床铺冷清狭小 无人常伴左右
Cold, small bed that has seldom seen a lover.
好 我鼻塞 而且头很痛 拜托你安静...
Okay, also, you know, I'm congested and my head is pounding, so if you could be quiet--
安静
Quiet!
五个毫不相干的字母 只有其中两个最重要
Five isolated letters, but only two matter--
你和我
"U" and "I."
寄出
And send.
我就知道
I knew it.
-我就知道 -知道什么
- I knew it. - Knew what?
我张贴征室友的广♥告♥时 我对自己说:「冠军」
When I placed that ad for a roommate, I said to myself "Hey, Champ"--
我会称呼自己是「冠军」
I call myself "Champ" in my head--
「你知道你有洁癖吧 」
"you do know that you're extremely cautious about germs, right?"
艾德华
Edward.
「邀请陌生人来家里时
"And when you invite a stranger into your home,
她就会像野生浣熊一样 带来感冒 细菌和疾病」
she's gonna bring sickness, bacteria, and disease like a feral raccoon."
好 越讲越过分啰
Okay, starting to feel mean.
我不能生病 奈儿
I can't get sick, Nell.
什么...你是怎样啊
What-- What-- Wha-- What the hell?!
我要你在自己的房♥间里隔离
I'm gonna need you to quarantine in your room.
什么 不行 这太夸张了 如果我想吃吐司怎么办
What? No, that is insane. Okay? W-What if I want some toast?
那就整包拿去
Then take the bread.
艾...等一下 如果我需要尿尿 或大号♥怎么办
Ed-- Hey! Wait, wait, wait wait! What if I have to pee? Or the other thing?
-忍♥住 -什么 艾德华
- Hold it. - What?! Edward!
等你确认全身上下都没有病 才能走出自己的房♥间
You need to stay in your room until you've tested negative for all of everything.
惨了 冠军
Oh, no. Champ.
又吃肉酱义大利面和彩虹糖
Bologna and Skittles again?
甚至不是彩虹糖 是盗版的
They're not even Skittles. They're Skattles.
为了领养小孩 我得存钱 但这真的不容易
I'm saving money for the adoption, and it is no joke.
你上次要求加薪是什么时候
When's the last time you asked for a raise?
两年前
Two years.
我在努力鼓起勇气问莱克希
I'm trying to muster up the courage to ask Lexi,
但每次鼓起勇气 我都会迸出奇怪的口音
but every time I do, I break into this weird English accent.
你们在这里啊
Here you are.
「妮豪」
'Ello, love.
这间餐厅很不怎么样
I'm not sure about this restaurant.
地板很脏 头上的照明也很差
The floors are very dingy and the overhead lighting is terrible.
你应该知道这里不是餐厅吧
You know that this isn't a restaurant, right?
好笑吧
Goof!
我在说笑话 因为我很有趣 还不错吧
I was making a joke, because I'm fun! How 'bout it?
说到有趣 我们离开这个无聊的鬼地方
Speaking of fun, why don't we blow this nerd stand
去我的私人俱乐部吃午餐吧
and go to my private club for lunch?
莱克希 我们知道你很有趣 你不必向我们证明
Lexi, we know you're fun. You don't have to prove anything to us.
我觉得这是个好主意
Well, I think it's bloody brilliant.
太好了 珊姆
Excellent. Sam?
我真的很想去 但我想赶快完成工作
I would love to. I just have so much work to do,
我要留在这里吃三明治
so I'm just gonna stay here and eat my sandwich.
我的午餐肉乳酪三明治
My Boar's Head!
听着 还好你们是老板的朋友
Listen, you're lucky to be friends with the boss
因为老板决定你们的工作量
because the boss decides how much you do and don't work.
来吧 拜托跟我一起去
So, come on. Please join me.
我会叫主厨帮你们准备特别的餐点
I'll make sure the chef prepares something
我要饿死了
very special for you.
我也答应过自己不能从垃圾桶找回食物
Well, I am starving, and I did make a promise to myself that I wouldn't retrieve food out of the garbage,
看来只能去俱乐部了
so I guess we are going to the club.
太好了 别担心服装规定
Wonderful. And don't worry about the dress code.
我说你们是波夕来的就好
I'll just tell them that you're visiting from Boise.
(布鲁克摩公♥寓♥)
都是你害的
You did this to me.
什么啦
Did what?
我生病了
I'm with disease!
你有想过也许是你传染给我的吗
Did you ever consider that maybe you got me sick?
对 我想过
Yeah, I thought about it.
然后我想到 我今天早上起床时没异状
But then I realized I woke up this morning feeling fine,
但现在不舒服了
and now I feel like poo.
拜托 艾德华 我想一个人好好休息
Please, Edward, I just wanna be left alone.
-我会让你休息 -谢谢
- I'll leave you alone. - Thank you.
但我想要鸡汤面 蜂蜜热茶 还有你的电热毯
But first, I want chicken noodle soup, tea with honey, and your heated blanket.
我病了 你不能打电♥话♥叫别人照顾你吗
I'm sick. Can you maybe call somebody else to baby you?
我没有女友了
I don't have a girlfriend anymore.
我是独♥立♥承包者 所以也没有同事
And I'm an independent contractor, so I don't have any coworkers.
我也不随便交朋友的 奈儿
And I'm particular about my social circle, Nell.
好啦 你这老屁孩
Fine, fine! You man-baby.
天啊 我从没吃过这么美味的十六道大餐
Wow. Well, that was the best 16-course meal that I've ever had.
三道珠鸡的量真多
I mean, three servings of fowl is... a lot of fowl.
想看点有趣的东西吗
Oh, do wanna see something fun?
我父亲和他的朋友都在那一桌
That table right there is where Father and his friends
决定下一届总统人选
always choose the next president.
真有趣 那应该可以回去了吧
Very cool. So I guess we're done, right?
还是丹尼斯有什么计画
I mean, unless Dennis has something on the agenda.
我没什么事要做
My schedule is wide open.
好 好吧 那我想我们该走了
Okay. All right. Well, then I guess we should be heading out.
等一下
Wait!
时间还早呢 还有很多时间能瞎闹作乐
The day is young. There's still so much time for mirth and tomfoolery.
莱克希 我们已经出来很久了
Lexi, we have been here for a very, very long time.
你难道不想回家陪坦纳吗
I mean, don't you want to go home and continue this with Tanner?
我想见坦纳随时都能见
Oh, I can see Tanner anytime.
我们何不去你们和奈儿一起去的酒吧
Why don't we go to that bar that you went to with Nell?
我们可以喝她喜欢的那种口水鸡尾酒
We can get one of those backwash cocktails that she was so fond of. Huh?
好 我帮我们叫个车就好
Yeah, I think we're just gonna call an Uber.
好了 我设定好温定 莱姆果冻就放在床头柜
There. I set the temperature, your lime Jell-O is on the nightstand,