背锅船长（2023）

‎（加勒比海女王）
‎慢慢向右转舵6度左右
Ease up to about six degrees on your starboard engine.
‎收到
Roger that.
‎看上去不错 对地航向244度
Looking good. Two-hundred forty-four over the ground here.
‎真棒
Muy bien.
‎（加勒比海女王）
‎（法国海♥关♥总♥署♥）
‎可以关闭引擎 准备靠岸
Go ahead and shut down engines and prepare to dock.
‎干得好 各位 完毕
Good work, guys. Over and out.
‎做得好 船长
Great job, Captain.
‎是啊 不是我吹牛 我开始掌握窍门了
Yeah. Startin' to get the hang of it.
Not to toot my own horn or anything.
‎我会让船员们重新粉刷修缮的
I'll get the crew working on the repainting and repairs.
‎很快就能修好 最多三天
It'll be fixed in no time. Three days max.
‎很好！我们的团队真棒
Great! What a team we are.
‎协调有序 运转良好
A well-oiled machinery.
‎片名：背锅船长
‎嘿 假期愉快哦！
Hey, have a great vacation!
‎嘿 船长！
Hey, Captain!
‎大胆猜测 你喜欢花 对吗？
Wild guess. You are a flower girl, right?
‎有各种颜色什么的 非常漂亮
You have some colors there and everything. So pretty.
‎我就知道你会喜欢
I just knew it.
‎-所以你准备好了吗？‎-是的
So are you ready? -Yeah.
‎你如此着急去见我的家人‎真是太好了
It's cool that you were so eager to come along and meet my family.
‎说实话 我还有点意外呢
I… A bit surprising, to be honest.
‎我想我只是想跟你来一次小小的冒险
I guess I just wanted to go on a small adventure with you.
‎路过摩纳哥时‎我还有一点私事要处理
And I have a tiny personal thing to attend to in Monaco on the way,
‎所以我想这是“一举两得”的事情
so I guess it's a "two birds with one stone" kind of thing.
‎很好 真是太好了
Great, that's just great.
‎不过我们好像不路过摩纳哥吧
Uh, Monaco is not really on the way though.
‎不会绕太多的路 也不会花太多时间
Oh, it's not much of a detour, and it won't take long,
‎但我们要去摩纳哥这件事‎是咱俩的小秘密 好吗？
but it has to be our little secret that we're going back there. Okay?
‎你是可以保守秘密的 对吗 宝贝？
You can keep a secret now, can't you, sweetie?
‎是的 当然 我会把嘴缝上的
Yes. Yes, of course. My lips are sealed.
‎景色真美啊
What a view.
‎哇 景色真棒啊
Wow. Views are cool.
Mmm.
‎我要去换一身更舒服的衣服了
I'm just going to change into something more comfortable.
‎听起来不错 我也要换
Ooh, that sounds perfect. Me too.
Oh! Oh, oh.
‎我有一点事情要办
I just have to run a little errand.
‎那我肯定要跟你一起去
Ya… Uh, well, I'll come with you, of course.
‎不用了 这是私事
Oh. No, it's… it's personal.
‎太好了 我真的很想跟你做一些私事
Oh, perfect. I really wanna do personal stuff with you.
‎好吧 听着 乔纳森
Okay, look, Jonathan.
‎要想长久在一起‎我们就不能让对方感到窒息 好吗？
If this is going to work, we can't smother each other. Okay?
‎要给彼此空间 这很重要
It's so important that we give each other space.
‎是的 在恋爱中‎给彼此空间才是健康的做法
Yes. Yes. Giving each other space in a relationship is so healthy.
‎我看到过的‎我犯了一个新手错误 抱歉
And I've… I've read that. It's a rookie mistake. I'm… I'm sorry.
‎没关系 很好 我马上回来 再见
No. Great. I'll be right back. See you.
‎好呢 再见 很好 很棒
Okay. Yeah. See ya. Cool. Very cool.
A high-profile Russian oligarch…
‎丽莎！
Liza. Liza! -Mmm.
‎猜猜是谁上新闻了‎是那位寡头 有人把他杀了！
Guess who's on the news. It's that oligarch. Someone killed him!
‎-真的吗？‎-是啊
Really? -Yeah.
‎看起来特别可怕
Looks pretty horrible.
‎有人把极度危险的放射性物质‎强行塞进他的直肠了
Someone forced a very dangerous radioactive thing up his rectum.
‎所以我估计‎不会再有那边的派对邀请了
So no more party invites there, I guess.
‎可能吧
Probably not.
‎为什么会有人做出这种事呢？
Why would anyone do something like that?
‎我也不知道 乔纳森
I wouldn't know, Jonathan.
‎也许他出♥卖♥♥♥什么人了‎告密的人会遭到报复 你懂的
Maybe he ratted someone out. Snitches get stitches, you know.
‎不懂 我还真不懂
No, I did not know that.
‎这可能是来接我们的
Oh. That is probably us.
‎是的 你可能是对的
Yeah. Yeah. You're probably right.
‎怎么了？你看起来有点紧张
Is anything wrong? You seem a little stressed.
‎我只是不知道 我们到达后会怎么样
Oh, I just don't really know what to expect when we get there.
‎-是吗？‎-是的
No? -No.
‎从小到大 有太多次斗智斗勇了
There have just been so many mind games growing up, though,
‎所以永远不知道会发生什么‎他们总是让人猜不透
so you can never know what to expect. They always keep you guessing.
‎好吧
Oh. Okay.
‎看啊 我猜这只是‎一种正常的恐惧表现
Look. Guess it's just a sign of the normal fright you have
‎发生在跟最亲近的家人见面前
before meeting up with your closest family.
‎是哦 看起来不太正常
Yeah, that doesn't seem very normal.
‎是的 这只是下意识的举动
Ah, well, it is. It's just the way that, uh… nature plays out.
‎我没明白你的意思 乔纳森
I don't follow you here, Jonathan.
‎你懂的 鸡舍里总有一只小鸡
You know, in… in the chicken coop, there is always one chick
‎会被其他小鸡团团围住 不停地啄
that the other chickens gang up on and just peck on constantly,
‎可能因为它是最小最弱的‎或者只是运气不好什么的
and it may be because it's the smallest or weakest or just bad luck or whatever,
‎但在我家 或者说鸡舍 被啄的总是我
but, uh, in my family, uh, or coop, that has always been me.
‎听起来真可怕
That sounds horrible.
‎不会啦 被啄只是随口一说‎我并没受过什么外伤
No. Well, the pecking has only been verbal,
So it hasn't hurt me on the outside,
‎所以外表一切正常 所以还不错啦
so the outside is perfectly fine, so, uh… that is good.
‎-是吗？‎-是的 没错
Is it? -Yeah. Yeah, it is.
‎一切正常 是的
It's all good. Yeah…
‎他们严格要求我 一定要按门铃
Oh, I have strict orders of always ringing the doorbell.
‎“只有流浪汉才会闯进人家”
"Only bums barge into a house."
‎哪怕是自己家吗？
Even your own house?
‎是的 尤其是自己家 爸妈总是这样说
Oh yeah, especially your own house, Mom and Dad always say.
‎乔纳森 亲爱的 见到你真好！
Jonathan, my dear. How nice to see you!
‎你好吗 康苏拉？我好想你啊
Oh! How are you, Consuela? I've missed you so much.
‎我也很想你 乔尼
Oh, and I have missed you, Johnny.
‎这位可爱的女士是谁呀？
And who is this lovely lady?
‎我是丽莎 乔纳森的同事兼女友
I'm Liza. Jonathan's colleague and girlfriend.
‎你俩看起来好般配呀
Oh! You two look so sweet together.
‎谢谢
Oh. Thank you.
‎我爸妈在家吗？
Are… Are my parents in?
‎在的 快请进吧 他们在花♥园♥呢
Yes, yes. Please, come in. They are in the garden.
‎弗尔先生和夫人 乔纳森回来了！
Mr. and Mrs. Fall, Jonathan is home!
‎乔纳森 我的宝贝儿子
Jonathan, my baby boy.
‎很高兴你能穿着制♥服♥回家
So glad to have you home in that uniform.
‎-我们已经开始拥抱了 对吗？‎-是的
Oh, we have started to hug, right? -Yeah, yeah, yeah.
‎那就过来抱抱你妈吧
Come here and hug your mother.
‎来一个真正温暖正常的拥抱
A real warm, normal hug.
‎-哇 这种感觉真棒‎-够了 你快过来吧
Wow, that feels good. -Enough of that. Come here, you.
‎感觉很棒 是的 非常自然
Ah, feels… feels good. Yeah. So natural.
‎啧啧 这不是背后捅刀子先生嘛
Well, well, well. If it isn't Mr. Backstabber
‎他连给他唯一的哥哥‎找份工作都不愿意呢
who won't help his only brother get a job.
‎-什么？‎-你非要在我面前显摆你的制♥服♥吗？
What? -Why have to shove the uniform in my face?
‎你知道被他们赶出来后‎我有多脆弱嘛
You know how fragile I am after they let me go.
‎我很遗憾你失去了工作‎但我穿制♥服♥并不是不尊重你
Well, I'm sorry you lost your job,
but I mean no disrespect by wearing a uniform.
‎是哦 好受伤啊 弟弟‎你用实际行动伤害了我
Yeah, right! Oh, that hurts, man. You hurt me with your actions.
‎好不知羞耻‎好不懂长幼有序 心里永远只有自己
No shame. No class. It's always "me, me, me, me--"
‎-闭嘴 坦纳！‎-是的 闭嘴！
Shut it, Tanner! -Yeah, zip it!
‎这位是谁呀？有什么能帮你的吗？‎你迷路了吗 小姐？
And who is this? Can we help you? Are you lost, miss?
Mm. Um…
‎很高兴认识你 丽莎
Oh! Nice to meet you, uh, Liza.
‎我也很高兴认识你们
Nice to meet you guys too. -But what do you really mean?
‎但你说她是你“女友”‎到底是什么意思？
You… You said "girlfriend," but that is probably very, very wrong.
‎可能完全被你搞错了
‎不 丽莎是我的好同事兼女友
No, no, Liza is my good colleague and girlfriend.
‎所以她只是你工作上的朋友
Oh, so she is a friend from work.
‎-我明白了‎-是的
I get it. -Ah, yes.
‎一位女性朋友而已
A female friend.
‎好吧 你可以这样说 但我们也在交往
Well, yes, you could say that, but we are also dating.
‎不是吧 这真是弥天大谎‎你心知肚明的
Come on. That is a horrendous lie, and you know it.
‎可以说 她是一位万人迷
She, dare I say, is a bombshell.
‎腰软易推倒
So fuckable.
‎她绝不会跟你约会‎也不会让你碰她的
She would never be dating you nor let you touch her,
‎永远都不会的
not in a million, bazillion years.
‎他没有说谎 坦纳
He's not lying, Tanner.
‎乔纳森只是没搞清楚‎“女友”这个词的意思
Jonathan is just confused by the term "girlfriend"
‎因为他以前从没交过女友
because he's never been close to having one before.
‎“女性朋友”和“女友”的概念
‎是的 就是这样 对吗 乔纳森？