哥们营地搞笑之旅（2019）

Must've attracted a bolt.
这很奇怪 因为在我的研究中
That's weird, because in my research,
尿液是不好的导体
urine was always a poor conductor.
你知道吗 艾伦 让我们上♥床♥睡觉吧
You know what, AlanLet's, uh, let's get you to bed, come on.
好吧 我必须去帐篷里吗
Okay, do I have to go in the tent?
是的
yeah, yeah.
哦 好吧 那很公平
Oh, okay, well, that's only fair.
嘿 你们可以帮我拉上拉链吗
Hey, could one of you guys zip me up?
计划1完成 做得好 男孩们
A-1 in the books, nice work, boys.
这都是你地图上计划的吗
That was all on your map, was it?
我可不想要这些
I don't want any part of this.
你就是 你就是在欺负他
You're just, you're just bullying him!
像你欺负其他人一样
Like you bully everybody else!
太好了 那你想让他娶我们的妈妈
Cool, so you're just going to let him marry Mom
并从此让他们快乐的生活在一起
and have their little happily ever after?
我认为这也没有那么糟糕
I don't think it'd be the worst thing in the world.
好嘛
Cool!
那么 你找到了新的住处吗
So, you find a new place to live yet?
好吧 一旦他们结婚 他都搬进来了
Well, once they're married and he's all moved in,
他们不只是要你闲逛
they're not just going to want you hanging around.
不知全貌 不予置评 亚当
You don't know that. Adam?
小凯说得对
He's got a point, Kev.
不 艾伦和我 我们在一个公会里 好吗
No, Alan and I, we're in a guild, okay?
所以 他永远不会背叛我
So, he'd never betray me.
情况不同了 凯文
Things change, Kevin.
公会解散了
Guilds break up.
他一搬进去
Once he moves in,
妈妈每周五做的酸奶 都拜拜了
your little Friday fro-yo dates with Mom, bye bye.
还有每天12点半的奶酪
Mac and cheese ready every day at 12:30?
不
Nope.
你在沙发上的电影时光 你最喜欢的那个
Your movie spot on the couch, your favorite spot.
-不 -想想吧
- No! - Effing ta-ta, man.
我...我的意思是 你可能因此比我们所有人损失更多
I... I mean, you probably stand to lose more in this than any of us,
我们并不是说你不能成为朋友
and we're not saying you can't be friends,
但是我们需要阻止这场婚礼
but we need to put a stop to this wedding.
想一想
Think about it.
我需要一个人静一静
I need to be alone with my thoughts.
-我想我们目的达到了 -你今晚开的玩笑太过分了
- I think we got him. - That shit you pulled tonight was too far.
我说了不要搞出人命
I explicitly said no murder.
你再这么弄 我就不来了
You pull that shit again and I'm done.
刚刚我检查了 那个家伙还没死
Last I checked, the guy's not dead.
克里斯蒂 男人婆 很高心见到你 玩得开心
恶心
Pfft, vomit.
嘿 蒂米
Hey, Timmy.
克里斯蒂
Christy?
你在这里做什么 走开 你真恶心
What are you doing hereGo away, you're gross.
真的吗
Oh, really?
这恶心吗
Is this gross?
是的
Yes.
那这个呢
What about this?
-嗯-嗯
- Uh... - Mm-hmm?
我还有东西要给你
I got something else for you.
这些 还有账单要支付
These, bills to pay!
- 什么 -蒂芙尼的骑马课
- What- Tiffany has horseback riding lessons
而且你拖欠了付款
and you're behind on the payments.
-不 -我的圣经学习课
- No! - I've got bible study.
- 什么 -每天60美元
- What- That's $60 a day.
为什么 那应该是免费的
For whatThat should be free!
孩子足球训练完了你去接了吗
Did you pick up the kids from soccer practice?
我们没有孩子
We don't have kids.
-蒂米 佩内洛普 朱利普 耶利米 - 哦 我的天
- Timmy, Penelope, Julep, Jeremiah. - Oh, my God!
还有安迪和莫莉 我忘记了一个人
Andy, and Molly, I'm forgetting someone.
朱利普现在是一名童子军了
Julep's a Boy Scout now.
-他希望你成为他们的领导 -不
- He wants you to be the team leader. - No!
还有些木头需要你来劈
There's some logs that need splitting outside.
你考虑过我们昨晚谈论的了么
Did you think at all about what we talked about last night?
我们看看会发生什么
We'll see what happens.
哦 早晨 阳光普照
Oh, morning, sunshine.
很高兴你可以加入我们
Glad you could join the men.
你的头发乱的恰到好处吗
Did you get your hair curled just right?
吃吧 伙计 我刚刚在和凯蒂和马♥克♥思♥视频
Eat it, dude. I was FaceTiming with Katie and Max.
男子汉营地里你还去视频兄弟 你可真是个妻管严
FaceTiming at Man CampDude, you are so whipped.
你在做什么
What are you doing?
我只是在想凯蒂鞭打我
I was just thinking about Katie whipping me
戴上类似印第安纳琼斯的小帽子
with, like, a little Indiana Jones hat on or something.
该尸体属于博物馆
That body belongs in a museum.
你们太过分了
You guys are going to Hell.
神殿
Temple of Do Me.
-艾伦还在睡觉吗 -是的
- Alan still asleep- Yeah.
我们应该把他叫醒
We should probably wake him up.
熊
Bear!
熊 熊
Bear, Bear!
凯文
Kevin!
艾伦的各种死法
哦 差点
Oh, that was so close!
我差点就抓到了
I almost had it!
他在那里呆了多久了
How long has he been out there?
45分钟吧
Like, 45 minutes.
我不明白 他现在应该体温过低了吧
I don't get it, he should have severe hypothermia by now,
濒临死亡了一样
like near death.
伙计 他好像玩得还挺开心的
Man, he's really going for it out there.
我不得不承认 我的意思是
I got to hand it to him, I mean,
他可能是个笨蛋 但他确实很坚定
he might be a dumb ass but he's a committed one.
是的 嗯 你知道
Yeah, well, you know,
至少是个不害怕承诺的人
at least somebody's not afraid of commitment.
我会害怕那个吗 不会
Is that supposed to make me upsetBecause it doesn't.
结婚 生孩子 都挺好的
Getting married, having kids, that's great.
但...
But...
...你并不总能在他身边
...you're not always going to be there for him,
而且我不会再让另一个孩子经历那件事
and I'm not going to put another kid through that.
看看小凯
Look at Kev.
这么怪异 老兄
So weird, dude.
这个家伙会成为我们的继父吗
This guy's going to be our stepdad?
爸爸会很生气的
Dad would be so pissed.
伙计们 爸爸不会生气
Dad wouldn't be pissed, guys.
嗯 那个 那句话是不是他说的
What was that, um, that saying that he came up with?
“永远不要只看事物的表面 ”
"Never judge a book by its cover."
-凯文 爸爸没有说过那个 那是...-实际上 大家都这么说
- Kevin, Dad didn't make that up, that's like... - Literally everyone says that.
-大家的爸爸都是 -大家都这么说
- Every dad. - Everyone says that.
哦 我抓到了 抓到了
Oh, got it! I got one!
- 妈的 - 我抓到了
- Oh, shit! - I got it!
-哦 -噢 天哪 它在尖叫
- Oh! - Oh, my God, it's screaming!
尖叫鱼会尖叫
It's screaming! Fish scream?
哦 我的天 来人帮帮忙
Oh, my God! Someone, please, help!
- 帮帮我 -那不是生物 艾伦 记住
- Help! - Not living things, Alan, remember!
海里面的蔬菜
Veggies of the sea.
-嗷 -你必须把它从痛苦中解救出来 哥们
- Ugh! - You got to put it out of its misery, bud.
大多数人喜欢...
Most people like...
-哦 - 什么
- Oh! - what?
哇
Wow!
我希望你能快乐
I hope you're happy!
干得好 你这个王八蛋
Well done, you sick son of a bitch.
所以 让我把这个说清楚
So, let me get this straight.
我说过让他摆脱苦难
I said put it out of its misery,
你首先想到的却是
and you first thought is let me bite
像个怪物一样咬掉他的头
this creature's head off like a monster?
好吧 这似乎比较像他们在自然环境下
Well, it seemed the closest type of death
面临的正常死法
that it might've faced in the natural world.
我真的很尊重那个
I respect that actually.
你知道我们在捉弄你 对吗
You know that was a setup, right?
怎么有人会傻到这样能够捉到鱼
Like a joke we play on people that are stupid enough
我们就是在捉弄你