哥们营地搞笑之旅（2019）

to think you can actually catch a fish like that.
是的 很明显
Yeah, that part was pretty obvious.
好吧 那你为什么不出来反驳呢
Well, then why didn't you just stand up for yourself?
什么 所以你就又可以再电我一次
What, so you could electrocute me on something else?
我拿着那可笑的矛去那个河里
I went in that water with that ridiculous little spear
向你们证明
to make a statement to you boys
没有什么我做不到的
that there's nothing I wouldn't do
向你证明我自己可以
to try to make it work with this family, on your terms, not mine.
我会一直待在那里
I'd have stayed out there all night,
直到不想了 或者我刺到一条该死的鱼
until either you broke or I stabbed a damn fish.
我是说 这应该没什么大惊小怪的
I mean, it was supposed to be this big cathartic symbol.
但是我感觉自己就像刺破了别人的皮肤一样
Then I actually pierced one's skin,
而且它尖叫了 我就惊慌失措了
and it shrieked, and I just panicked.
好吧 做得好
Well, well done.
是的 谢谢
Yeah, thanks.
但是 如果你认为这将变得如此简单
But if you think it's going to be that easy,
但是另一个问题会摆在你面前
you got another thing coming.
那你就得有很多的事情需要在意了
You got a lot to live up to
首先就是婚姻
when it comes to marriage number one.
我认为他会是她的灵魂伴侣的 蒂姆
I know he'll always be her soulmate, Tim.
就应该这样
And that's the way it should be.
他一定是男人的榜样
He must've been a hell of a man.
我...我希望我见过他
I... I wish I had met him.
我很高兴她喜欢我在身边
I'm just glad she likes being around me.
好吧 我要去换件干衣服
Well, I'm going to put on some dry clothes.
每个人都会给他们的妻子和孩子说自己爱他们
Everybody hydrate and tell your wives and kids you love them.
我们要去克里酒吧
We're going to Curly's.
来吧 你个王八蛋 我在等你 好吗
Come on, you bitch. This is happening, okay?
不要逼我使用武力
Don't make me take you by force.
我向凯蒂保证 我不会再
I promised Katie that I would never go back there,
像那次那样的
not after last time.
来吧 伙计
Come on, dude.
不要再那样了啊 那个家伙又没有死 我的意思是...
The charges were dropped, and the guy didn't die, I mean...
没死 你就凭这个说一切都好
Didn't dieThat's your qualification for everything being fine,
-他没有死 -我们该怎么回应
- that he didn't die. - How else are we supposed to bond
如果我们不带他去的话 他会不会出♥卖♥♥♥我们
with wiener lips back here if we don't take him to Curly's?
这才是真正可以区分一个男孩和男人的
It's what separates the men from the boys.
亚当 兄弟
Adam, bro.
行吧
Fine.
但是...
But...
不带手♥机♥
phones are locked in the glove box.
没有证据 最多喝两杯 好吗
No evidence, and two drink max, okay?
来吧 伙计
Totes, dude.
再来两杯
Two more moonshines, please!
凯文凯文 你要喝一杯吗
Three, KevinKevin, you having a moonshine?
一个小时前我就没喝了
I switched to water an hour ago.
凯文一个小时前就改喝水了
Kevin switched to water an hour ago.
你能把下巴稍微抬一抬吗
Could you lift your chin just a little...
完美
Perfect.
谢谢 艾伦在哪
Thank you. Where's Alan?
那家伙在哪
Where's that guy?
伙计 如果你伤害了我妈妈 她是个好人
Now, dude, if you hurt my mom, she's a good dude.
如果你伤害了她...
If you hurt her...
- 哇 - 懂么
- Wow. - Get it?
好吧 第一 我明白你的意思
Okay, number one, I get what you're saying,
但别急 因为我爱她 好吗
but hold your horses, because I love her, okay?
- 我也是 -所以如果你爱一个人...
- Me too, me too. - So if you love someone...
我相信你 我相信这一点
I know you do, and I believe in that,
但是如果我爱一个人 我不会伤害她的
but if I love someone, I'm not going to hurt someone,
因为她是我的家人 兄弟 就像你一样
because she's my family, bro. Just like you are.
-你是一家人 - 那就对了
- You are family. - That's right.
-永远不要把自己看得太重或者太低 - 那就对了
- Never above you, never below you. - That's right.
- 一直与你同在 - 就这样
- Always with you. - That's it.
-我听说 你知道...-啊
- I hear, you know... - Ugh!
如果有人...给凯蒂...如果有人做了某事...
If somebody... to Katie... if somebody did something...
有一次 这个人在厕所墙上
One time, this guy wrote something
-写了些她的坏话 老兄 - 不会吧
- about her on a bathroom wall, dude. - No way!
-我当时...-你是认真的吗
- And I was... - Are you serious?
哦 你 你杀了他么
Oh, you, you killed him?
-我很想 -哦
- I wanted to. - Oh.
我差不多了 我差点就杀了他
I almost did. I still almost want to kill him, almost.
-差不多了-我要去做
- Almost. - I'm going to do it.
我就要去弄他
I'm going to rough him up!
-我要去揍扁他 -是的
- I'm going to rough up Eric Brinkerhoff. - Yeah!
-蒂姆 - 来吧
- Tim! - Come on!
他们叫这个什么 嗯 同花顺
What do they call a, uh, straight flush?
我认为我赢了 对吗
I think it's a win, right?
很好 嗯 希望你喜欢我的手表
Nice, eh. Enjoy the watch.
谢谢你 大手表
Thank you, big watch.
-我要你的钥匙 -不行 哥们
- I need your keys. - Ain't happening, bud.
-不 只有我和艾伦...-好吧 下一个是谁
- No, it's just me and Alan just... - All right, who's next?
我和艾伦要去揍埃里克一顿
Me and Alan are going to go rough up Eric,
埃里克·布林克霍夫 我要钥匙...
Eric Brinkerhoff and I need the keys...
嘿 兄弟 你为什么不先醒半个小时的酒
Hey, bud, why don't you sober up for a half hour,
然后再去揍他 好吗
then I'll go rough up Eric Brinkerface, okay?
你老婆很火♥辣♥
Your wife is hot.
你在看什么
What are you looking at?
这一次 我还上了凯蒂的二垒
This one time, I got to second base with Katie Baker.
凯蒂·贝克是我老婆 你这个混♥蛋♥
Katie Baker is my wife, you asshole!
小子 有什么问题吗
We got a problem, son?
二垒
Second base.
我要揍你♥他♥妈♥的
I'm about to rough you up!
你能不能
Now if I could just get you to,
稍微转一转
just turn to the light a little bit.
让光照到脸颊上
Cheek down.
- 像这样 嗯 -没错
- Like thisMm-hmm. - Absolutely.
你确定以前从未当过模特吗
Are you sure you never modeled before?
那很好
That was good.
你拥有北欧女王的额线
You have the brow line of a Nordic queen.
我相信你一直都知道
I'm sure you get that all the time.
爸爸说我的额头是他见过的最硬的
My daddy said I had the hardest forehead he'd ever seen.
好吧 他没错
Well, he's not wrong.
这个确实很硬
It's hard.
而且饱含深思 还有求知欲
And also pensive, inquisitive.
不 我没那么好学
No, I ain't no inquisitiver.
你是处♥女♥座吗
Are you by any chance a Virgo?
不 因为我15岁就不是了
Nope, not since I was 15.
爸爸喜欢
Daddy like.
你这个白♥痴♥ 这是你自找的
You moron, you brought this on yourself.
有他 去 去 跑
Got him, go, go, go run!
我马上到 嗯 不
I'll be right there! Uh, no.
不 不 不 不要吵
No, no, no, don't fight it.
不要打架
Don't fight it.
天哪 太神奇了 伙计
Holy shit, that was amazing, dude!
兄弟 我们把那个家伙扔飞了 我们把他丢了出去
Dude, we threw that guy! We threw him!
我们扔了那个家伙
We threw a guy!
还有艾伦 艾伦来了个锁喉 兄弟
And Alan, Alan with the choke hold, bro!
天哪 艾伦
My man! Alan?
艾伦
Alan?
我们忘了艾伦
We forgot Alan!
克里 酒吧
凯文
Kevin.
他们在做什么
What are they doing?
他们可能在分他的财物
They're probably divvying up his personal effects.
-是的 -现在 我敢肯定你们都在想
- Yeah! - Now, I'm sure you're all wondering,
Lumpy的卡在哪里 就在这里
what happened to Lumpy's card, and it's right here!
是的
Yeah!
哦 我的车到了 走了
Oh, my ride's here, got to go.
你们有点过分
Like hell you do.
克里 我想给这些兔崽子买♥♥些饮料
Curly, I'd like to buy these sons of bitches a round of drinks.
是的
Yeah!