哥们营地搞笑之旅（2019）

酷 嗯 那让我洗个澡 然后我们就走 好吗
Cool, uh, let me grab a quick rinse, then we'll head, okay?
-男子汉营地 -男子汉营地
- Man Camp! - Man Camp!
那么 凯蒂现在独守空房♥么
So, uh, is Katie staying home alone?
嘿 为什么不等我们到那里时你再冲洗呢
Hey bud, why don't you rinse off when we get there?
我要离开这里
I'm going to get out of here.
所以 你很快就要毕业了吗
So you, uh, planning on graduating anytime soon?
还是你只是想混着日子
Or are you just going to kind of hang out, become the next-door
-整天意淫人家的照片吗 - 拜托 伙计
- dude perving on people's family pictures- Come on, dude.
你是什么意思呢 那个家伙欺骗凯蒂
What do you mean "come on?" That guy was fricking perving on Katie.
每个人都想意淫凯蒂 伙计 这就是生活的循环
Everyone pervs on Katie, dude, it's the circle of life.
每个...那么你也在意淫凯蒂 你也这么做吗
Every... so you perv on Katie, that's something you do?
她去年才生完孩子 所以显然最近没有了
She had, like, a baby last year, so obviously not lately,
老兄那太可怕了
that'd be pretty messed up, dude.
此外 她是我的家人
Besides, she family's on me.
-喝酒么 - 我在开车
- Brewski- I'm driving.
-对哈 -我不知道 伙计
- Right, stick shift. - I don't know, man.
所有这些聚会 酗酒
All this partying, drinking nonstop,
每个星期都换不同的女孩
different girl every week.
你是时候得长大了
At some point you're going to have to grow up.
什么 这样我就像你一样了
What, so I can get it together like you?
老婆 孩子 每月卖♥♥两辆车 开始为纳税和其他一些烦心事而烦恼么
Get a wife, kid, sell like two cars a month, pay taxes and shit?
这种感受一定很孤独吧
It must be pretty lonely on the top of that mountain.
你不纳税吗
You don't pay taxes?
爸爸 我也不知道 让我咨♥询♥下我的会计师
I don't know, Dad, let me check with my accountant.
你好 斯坦伯格先生的办公室
Hello, Mr. Steinberg's office.
-是的 我等等 -老兄 别傻了
- Yeah, I'll hold. - Dude, don't be a dick.
别装了 伙计这tm根本不是电♥话♥ 兄弟
Fake out, dude! It's not even a real phone, bro.
妈妈告诉我你就是个意外
Mom told me you were an accident.
好吧 嗯 生活 嗯...
Well, um, life, uh...
总会找到出路的
Finds a way.
家
妈妈
Mom?
妈 我们回来了
Mom, we're home!
我没有看到凯文的滑板车啊
I don't see Kevin's GoPed.
他住在车♥库♥里 对吧
He's living in the garage, right?
嘿 小凯 兄弟
Hey, Kev, bud?
小凯
Kev?
大家都哪去了
Where the hell is everybody?
勇敢的战士比尔
Brave warrior Bill,
你必须去紫禁山
you must journey to the Forbidden Mountain
从黑暗魔王的阴影中拯救我的父亲
and save my father from the shadows of the Dark Lord.
我会的 夫人
I will, my lady, and when I return.
当我回来时 我会向你求婚
I shall ask for your hand in marriage
到那时 你将获得真正的回报
And at that time you shall have your true reward.
卡巴扎杜伊的强大之斧啊
The Mighty Ax of Kabazaduil.
兄弟 醒醒 笨蛋
Bro, wake up dipshit!
我的女士
My lady?
-凯文 我是蒂姆 -蒂姆
- Kevin, hello, it's Tim! - Tim?
-他吸毒了吗 -让我们试一下他听得懂的话
- Is he on drugs or something- Let's try his, that language that he knows.
我其实不懂语言 我也不知道
I don't actually know the language, I don't actually know.
凯文 凯文 醒醒
Kevin, Kevin, wake up.
他的画技一点都没有进步
He hasn't gotten any better at drawing.
凯文 醒醒 伙计 嘿 小凯
Kevin, wake up, dude. Hey, Kev.
嘿 兄弟们
Hey, bros.
那...那个...什...什么风把你们给吹来了
I... To what do I... I owe this... prestigious pleasure?
老兄 这是男子汉营地周
It's Man Camp week, dude.
是男子汉营地 ...这是男子汉营地周吗
It's Man Camp... it's Man Camp weekend?
当然 嗯 是的 我当然 当然知道
Sure, uh, sure, yeah. Totes, totes knew that.
妈妈在吗
Yeah, is... is Mom around?
其实 妈妈...妈那个 让我检查一下计划表
Actually, mom... Mom is, uh, let me check the planner.
哦 她说
Oh, she said...
嗯 是的 看 公♥司♥休假去了
Um, yes. See, a work retreat.
休假
A work retreat?
恩 是的 差不多是公♥司♥团建的那种
Uh, yeah, something about team building exercises.
对于自己拥有的业务
For her business that she owns herself,
她没有员工吗
and she doesn't have any employees?
嗯
Mm-hmm.
她一点也不担心
She wasn't worried at all
想在我们去小屋的路上错过我们吗
about missing us on her way up to the cabin?
是的 很好 我确定我们回来时她会在这里 所以
Yeah, well, I'm sure she'll be here when we get back, so
我们会见到她然后打个招呼的
we'll see her then to say hi.
那么 怎么样
So, how is it man?
东西都搬回家里了 是吧 还好吗
All moved in back at home, is it, uh, pretty nice?
好极了
Epic.
-是吗 -是的 太好了
- Yeah- Yeah, it's sweet.
嗯 除了那
Um, you know, other than that
我现在在大学里混的风生水起
I'm just killing it at college right now.
我的五年计划
Five year plan.
我还以为 网上大学
I thought, uh, online college
不到两年就能毕业呢
was like a less than two year kind of thing.
是的 如果你的智力较差 只想要一个学位
Yeah, if you're intellectually inferior and only want one degree.
我已经有四个了 我有了哲学
I have four already, so we got philosophy,
天体物理学 量子力学和家庭经济学的学位
astrophysics, quantum mechanics, and home economics.
哇 ...是妈妈付款还是
Wow, is... is Mom paying or?
别说了 嗯 她会报销的
I'm going to stop you there. Uh, she will be reimbursed.
所以 这就是五年计划的全部内容
It's all part of, you know, five year plan, so.
那你有工作了吗
You got a job then or?
是的 实际上我已经开始自己的生意 配送
Yeah, I started my own business actually, distribution.
配送什么啊
Of what?
就像啤酒 葡萄酒和烈酒一样
Uh, just like, beer, wine, spirits.
哦 你的酒卖♥♥给谁
Oh, you're a liquor rep for, uh, for who?
自己买♥♥不到的人 例如他们可能太年轻
People that can't get it themselves, like they're either too young
或者不够老
or not old enough,
或者多数情况下
or in a lot of cases
他们出生的比自己期望的要晚一点
they're just born later than they should've been.
凯文 这是非法的 兄弟
Kevin, that's illegal, bud.
宪法里面怎么说的呢
Where does it say that in the Constitution?
因为这是美国 我也是美国人 所以
Because this is America and last I checked I'm American, so.
你是在向孩子们卖♥♥酒 凯文
You're selling alcohol to children, Kevin.
好吧 他们看起来就像成年人
Well, they identify as adults,
所以 天呐 这并不敏感
so, jeez, that's insensitive.
嘿 这个人不是因为经营非法什么的
Hey, isn't this guy in jail for running an illegal cat
而入狱的吗
fighting ring or something?
猫
Cats?
不 实际上是兔子
No, rabbits actually.
这是可以获得更高的净收入的方式
It's way higher net revenue.
蒂姆
Tim?
我去 是克里斯蒂 快把我藏起来
Shit, it's Christy Borders, hide me.
蒂姆 是你吗 嘿 伙计们 我们好久没见了
Tim, is that youHey, guys, it's been, like, forever.
蒂姆 你们看起来都长大了
Tim, you look all grown up.
怎么回事 嘿 克里斯蒂 我们 嗯 我们正要走了 所以
What's upHey, Christy, we, uh, we were just about to leave, so.
哦 你们是要去... 你们的小男孩营地
Oh, yeahWhere are you guys... oh, your little Min Camp.
-那是男子汉营地 -她真的很烦
- It's called Man Camp. - She's the worst.
嗯 蒂姆 我最近正在清理壁橱
Uh, you know, Tim, I was cleaning out my closet recently,
然后 发现你写给我的那首情诗 你还记得吗
and, uh, found that love poem you wrote me. Do you remember?
- 不 -哦 拜托 你确实那么做过
- Nope. - Oh, come on, yeah, you do.
你是八年级写给我的 邀请我参加毕业舞会
You wrote it in eighth grade to ask me to prom,
你还取了个名字 “性感诗”
and you titled it, like, "Sexy Poem."
听起来像是假诗
It sounds like a fake poem.
好吧 这是真的 我还找到了 嗯...
Well, it's real and I found it, um...
其实还是有点后悔我没有说愿意 特别是看到你现在这样
kind of bummed I didn't say yes seeing as how you grew up.
好吧 嗯 你没有那样做 我还以为你觉得那很烂
Well, uh, you didn't so, sucks for you I guess.
是的 嗯 希望你们能喜欢自己的“ 男子汉营地”
Yeah, um, well, you guys enjoy your "Man Camp."
再见 蒂姆
Bye, Tim.
克里斯蒂 很高兴见到你
Really nice to see you, Christy.
老兄 你和她到底什么关系
What's your deal with her, dude?
我们小时候 你曾经迷恋她
You used to be obsessed with her when we were kids.
现在 你实际上还是 你为什么要这么抗拒
Now you actually have a shot, and you're being a total douche.
你看到她的假牙了么 她现在完全不在我的考虑范围
Well, now she has wooden teeth, okayHard pass.
来吧 走吧
Come on, let's go.
冰块 放进去