小行星城（2023）

Hmm. Maybe we are doomed.
我会的。
I will.
我的玫瑰玛丽
My Rose Marie
再见。
Goodbye.
他来了。
Here he comes.
我刚刚通知了总统。
I've just informed the president.
他授权我阅读并执行这些条款
He authorized me to read and implement the provisions
国♥家♥安♥全♥紧急混战计划X
of National Security Emergency Scrimmage Plan X.
我走了。
Here I go.
以下绝密指令于1950年7月1日被授权成为法律
"The following top secret directive was mandated into law on July 1, 1950."
“万一有意外的约会
"In the event of unforeseen engagement
与智慧生命形式或来自任何星球的形式
"with intelligent life-form or forms from any planet
“并没有明确定义为我们的地球，
"not specifically defined as our Earth,
"建议启动以下程序。
"be advised to initiate the following protocols.
“第一，确认说生命形式不是在指导下运作的
"One, confirm said life-form is not operating under the guidance
"任何敌对的外国陆地政♥府♥"
"of any hostile foreign terrestrial government."
不，我不认为他在为俄♥罗♥斯♥人工作
No, I don't think he's working for the Russians
或者红色中国，但你永远不知道。
or the Red Chinese, but you never know.
他当然没有给我那种印象。
He certainly didn't give me that impression.
"第二，确认生命体不打算吞并，
"Two, confirm the life-form does not intend to annex,
殖民、蒸发或征用资源
"colonize, vaporize, or expropriate the resources
"美♥利♥坚♥合众国的主♥权♥领土"
"of the sovereign territories of the United States of America."
我很怀疑。他带着小行星走了。
I doubt it. He took the asteroid and went.
第三，确认并拘留所有可能的证人
"Three, identify and detain all possible witnesses
并将他们集体逮捕
"and place them under group arrest
"为期不少于一个星期
"for a period of no less than one week
定义为七个日历日
"defined as seven calendar days
在这段时间里，他们要服从
"during which time they be subjected
"接受一系列的医疗和心理治疗
"to a prescribed battery of medical and psychological
“检查和交叉检查。”
"examinations and cross-examinations."
标准程序。已经在做了。
Standard procedure. Already in the works.
“第四，确保现场安全，
"Four, secure the site,
“停止传播信息;
"cease the dissemination of information,
“收集并运送全部证据
"collect and transport the totality of evidence
"到一个密封的，
"to a hermetically enclosed,
"地下深处的秘密储存设施
"deep-underground secret storage facility
并公开否认该事件的所有方面，
"and publicly deny all aspects of the event,
“包括其存在不少于100年的时间，
"including its existence, for a period of no less than 100 years,
“定义为36500天。”
"defined as 36,500 days."
指令结束。
End of directive.
-很清楚。嗯。
-That's pretty clear. -Huh.
我们怎么跟他们说?——谁?
-What do we tell them? -Who?
少年观星者，太空学员，妈妈和爸爸。
The Junior Stargazers, the Space Cadets, the moms and dads.
-米琪·坎贝尔。-米琪·坎贝尔。
- Midge Campbell. - Midge Campbell.
告诉他们什么都没发生?
Tell them it didn't happen?
不，显然，我们得编个合适的借口。
No, obviously, we'll have to formulate a suitable cover story.
你敢说我吗?
You dare me?
-你敢说什么?-按那个按钮。
-Dare you what? -To press that button.
我会扭断你的脖子。
I will break your neck.
那是外星人在吃苹果。那是一个外星人在做开合跳。
That's an alien eating an apple. That's an alien doing jumping jacks.
那是一个戴大礼帽的外星人。那是外星人在爬梯子。
That's an alien in a top hat. That's an alien climbing a ladder.
那是一个骑着赛马的外星人。那是外星人……
That's an alien on a racehorse. That's an alien...
让我们从头开始。
Let's take it from the top.
我跟你说过50遍了，外星人捡到了小行星…
I told you 50 times, the alien picked up the asteroid...
——“所谓“外星人。-我知道我看到了什么!
-"Alleged" alien. -I know what I saw!
-这叫陨石。-一个外星人。
-It's called a meteorite. -An extraterrestrial being.
这是你们校报的缩微胶卷。
This is a microfiche of your school newspaper.
你在一篇批评文章后面署名
Your byline accompanies an article criticizing
校长的惩戒方法。
the principal's disciplinary methods.
-你的线人是谁?我在六年级。
-Who were your sources? -I was in the sixth grade.
-回答问题。-我不会指名道姓!
-Just answer the question. -And I will not name names!
-你挑战我!我说什么来着?
-You dared me! -What did I say?
我说什么来着?-你挑战我!
-What did I say? -You dared me!
好吧。嗯…
All right. Um...
当我打电♥话♥给你…
When I'm calling you...
我要试着继续
I'm going to attempt to proceed
用我原先准备的教案
with the lesson plan I originally prepared.
只是为了在这种情况下保持秩序。
Just to keep orderliness under the circumstances.
我期望一些……
I expect that some...
我们关于外层空间的一些信息可能不再完全准确，
Some of our information about outer space may no longer be completely accurate,
但是，无论如何，仍然只有9个行星
but, anyway, there are still only nine planets
在太阳系中，据我们所知。比利?
in the solar system, as far as we know. Billy?
除了现在有个外星人。
Except now there's an alien.
从表面上看，确实如此。
True, by all appearances.
然而,海王星……
Nevertheless, Neptune...
直径第四大的行星，
Fourth largest planet by diameter,
海王星每165年绕太阳公转一次。柏妮丝吗?
Neptune orbits the sun only once every 165 years. Bernice?
也许外星人去过那里。
Maybe the alien went there.
嗯,也许吧。
Well, maybe.
我想没有人知道外星人去了哪里，从哪里来。
I don't think anybody knows where the alien went or came from.
是的,德怀特?
Yes, Dwight?
一开始，我觉得外星人有点狡猾，
At first, I thought the alien was kind of sneaky,
但现在我想他可能对去地球感到紧张。
but now I think he was probably nervous to go to Earth.
我敢打赌，他以前从没来过这里。
He's never been here before, I bet you.
那他为什么要偷我们的小行星，
Then why'd he steal our asteroid, then,
如果他是个绅士的话?
if he's such a gentleman?
这些都是合理的问题，
These are all reasonable questions,
但现在，让我们继续关注海王星
but, at this time, let's stick to Neptune
因为我没有时间准备任何教案
because I haven't had time to prepare any lesson plan
关于我们正在讨论的话题。
on this subject we're talking about.
外星人。
The alien.
外星人，是的。
The alien, yes.
顺便说一下，我并不想回避你的问题。
And, by the way, I don't mean to evade your questions.
我想强调你很安全。
I want to emphasize that you're safe.
我们都在地球上。
We all are, here on Earth.
至少有件事通知了你父母。
Your parents have been notified of at least something.
美国仍然处于和平状态。
America remains at peace.
是的,蒙大拿?
Yes, Montana?
琼，如果可以的话，我想跟你谈谈。
I'd like to parley a notion myself, if I could, June.
嗯…
Um...
好吧。
Okay.
我猜这个外星人来自一个部落
I figure this here alien come from a tribe
我们什么都不知道，对吧?
we don't know nothing 'bout, do we?
我们说的一切都只是猜测。
Anything we say'd just be pure speculation.
但我告诉你我的想法。
But I tell you what I reckon.
我认为那个外星人根本没有恶意。
I reckon that alien don't mean no harm at all.
我猜他是自己跑到这里来的
I reckon he just took hisself down here
去看看这片土地和上面的人♥民♥。
to have a look-see at the land and the peoples on it.
本着探索的精神。
In the spirit of exploration.
我不会把外星人看得很可疑。
See, I don't look on a feller alien all suspicious-like.
不，他不是美国人。
No, he ain't American.
不，他不是上帝创造的绿色地球的生物。
No, he ain't a creature of God's green Earth.
但他是某个地方的生物，我们也是。
But he's a creature of somewheres, and so are we.
现在，让我们对这老家伙表示一下热情，
Now, let's show the old feller some hospitality,
如果他是条卑鄙小人，
and if he turns out to be a dirty dog,
我想他不是
which I reckon he ain't,
那是美国武装部队的工作，
well, that'll be a job for the United States armed forces,
而且他们从来没有输过一场战争。
and they ain't never lost a war yet.
Thanky-do。
Thanky-do.
我同意蒙大拿的观点。
I agree with Montana.
现在,海王星。
Now, Neptune.
告诉我，他们去了哪里?
Tell me, where do they go?
烟圈…
The smoke rings...
他往哪边走了?
Which way did he go?
嗯。我想他是从这里出发的
Hmm. Well, I think he went from here
到这里到这里到…
to here to here to...
我不知道在哪里。
I don't know where.
我妈妈不记得哪个是哪个，
My mother couldn't remember which was which,
所以她编了自己的星座。
so she made up her own constellations.
那个是衣架。那个是漏水的水龙头。
That one's the Coat Hanger. That one's the Leaky Faucet.
那边是锅铲煎蛋。