亡命30英里（2018）

拜托了
Please.
额 西尔维娅
Uh, Sylvia?
哦 是你啊
Oh, good, it's you.
你能帮我一下吗 保罗
Could you give me a hand, Paul?
额 我只是下来检查一下井
Oh, I was just coming down to check the well.
水槽都堵死了
The sink's all backed up.
哦 很抱歉
Oh, sorry about that.
处理这些东西可真没什么好办法
There really is no good way to dispose of these.
关你什么事
What do you care?
反正你也不会记得
It's not like you're gonna remember anyway.
到了九点你就晕过去了
You'll be blacked out by nine.
你♥他♥妈♥在说什么
What the fuck?
我是说 两次婴儿派对 伊莱恩
I mean, two baby showers, Elaine?
哦 我的天
Oh my god.
你没来乔乔家
And you didn't come to Jojo's,
你没来萨利家
you didn't come to Sally's.
她是你继女啊
She's your step-kid.
她四岁了
She was four years old!
她两岁半了 但她仍然是我的第一个孩子
She was two and a half and she was still my first baby!
讲真 谁会就因为好朋友家离自己家有好几站地
Seriously, who doesn't visit their best friend
就不去看她呢
just because they live a fucking bus ride away?
是在康涅狄格州 贝丝 不仅仅有几站地
It's Connecticut, Bess, not a bus ride.
有个叫北方地铁的东西啊 伊莱恩
It's called the Metro North, Elaine,
就一个半小时就到了
and it takes about an hour and a half!
你是对的 我很抱歉
You're right, I'm so sorry!
在付两份房♥租 换成人尿布和
Between paying two rents, changing adult diapers
不让我妈妈从楼梯上摔下来这几件事之间
and keeping my mom from falling down the stairs,
我确实有时间去郊区兜风
I definitely had time for a joyride to the suburbs!
我们可以来的 好吗
We would have come in, okay?
我们可以去参加葬礼
We could have come to the funeral,
带你去吃午餐 带你去公园
taken you out to lunch, taken you to the park.
哦 因为和你完美的家庭一起他妈的去动物园
Oh because going to a fucking petting zoo
正是我成为孤儿的第一天
with your perfect family is exactly how I want to spend
最想干的事情是吗
my first days as an orphan!
这是你自己的选择
You made a choice!
你一直忙着工作
You were all about work.
从来没提过要孩子的事
You never once talked about having kids!
那废话
Oh how could I?
你永远在不停地叭叭叭你自己的孩子
You never for a second stopped fucking talking about yours!
大家都好吗
Everyone okay?
我想我们已经把水槽疏通了
I think we unclogged the sink.
哦 别这样 伙计
Oh, come on, dudes!
操
Fuck.
我去换个衣服
I'm gonna change.
当然不会了
Of course it doesn't.
来吧
Come on.
哦 我的天
Oh gosh.
我应该跟着感觉走的
I should be listening to my uh oh feelings.
啊 这下面臭死了
Ah, smells like shit down here.
我就是这么跟孩子说的
That's what I tell the kids.
跟着你们自己的感觉走
Listen to their uh oh feelings.
他们多大来着 五岁吗
What are they, five?
都是傻♥逼♥
They're fucking idiots.
我看不到煤油灯啊
I don't see any lamps.
好了 等下 能等会儿吗
Okay, hold up, would you please?
她说是地下室后面
She said back of the basement, ah.
地下室后面
Back of the basement.
拜托了 拉瑞
Come on, Larry.
我保证就在这里面
I'm sure it's in here.
是啊
Yeah.
没准后面还有老的花♥花♥公♥子♥呢
Yeah, maybe some old Playboys back here.
炸了的充气娃娃
Blow up sex doll.
会很有趣的 哈
That'd be fun, huh?
好吧 等等
Okay, wait.
这就是吗 这就是那些
Is this it, this is one of those, um...
哦对 是的 让我看看
Oh yeah, that's, let me see.
-野营灯 是吗 -对
- Camping lamps, right? - Yup.
我想这个...
I think you just...
我想这个...
I think you just...
-对 -啊 酷
- Yup. - Ah, cool.
好了
Boom.
我们有光了
We have light.
这闻起来就像公共澡堂一样 伙计
Oh, it smells like a damn public bathroom, man.
就像是有一堆
It was like a stack.
有一堆动物的尸体 伙计
It was like a stack of animals, dude.
而西尔维娅就
And Sylvia was just...
伙计 我不想知道
Dude, I don't wanna know, man.
抱歉 我做不到
I'm sorry, I can't.
我 我没带着烟斗
I just, I don't have my pipe here
而且我...
and I just...
我还没嗨到听这些东西
I'm not high enough to hear this shit.
而且你绝对不能跟那些女孩们说
And you definitely can't be telling the girls.
我们现在不能再乱了
We cannot take any more crazy right now.
好吧 你能把防水布递给我吗
Fine, can you just hand me the tarps please?
你知道吗 你疯了 哥们
You know, you're nuts, man.
我们最不该做的就是
The last thing we should be doing
处理西尔维娅的这些烂事
is Sylvia's damn housework.
对 无论如何 来吧
Right, whatever, come on.
你知道吗 这就是她为什么要你来干
You know, that's why she asked you.
因为她知道就你这样的傻♥逼♥会同意
She knew that you would be the only sucker to say yes.
告辞
Bye.
看看这个
Look at that.
还开着吗
Is it on?
是啊 说个茄子
Yeah, say cheese.
也许西尔维娅在拍一部关于老鼠的纪录片
Maybe Sylvia's working on a rat documentary.
想说点什么吗
Wanna say a few words?
快关上 你个神经病
Turn it off, it's super creepy.
现在你真的看起来超辣
You look really hot in this light.
闭嘴
Shut up.
也许麦克斯有一个科研博客 孤独麦克斯15号♥
Maybe Max has a science blog, LonelyMax15.
对 麦克斯上网？
Right, Max on the internet.
他相册里都没有他自己的照片
He wouldn't even be in photographs.
好吧 我们来看看
Okay, let's see.
看看里面有什么
Let's see what's on it.
不 拉瑞 住手 好了
No, Larry, stop, okay,
要是他的撸管片什么的呢
what if he's masturbating or something?
我不想看见这些东西
I don't want that image in my head.
死人撸管？
Dead guy jacking off?
拉瑞
Larry.
好了 啊 穿着衣服呢
And, ah, not naked.
他也许该洗澡了但是
Needs a shower maybe but...
哦 麦克斯
Oh, Max.
好了 额
Yeah, uh.
这几年非常棒
Those were some really great years.
你知道的 伙计们 你们是麦克海尔大厅帮 而且
You know, you guys, you were the McHale Hall Crew, and...
也是我最好的朋友 所以
...my best friends, so.
我知道我们会在另一个世界见面的 所以
I know I'll see you on the other side, so...
原谅我吧
Forgive me.
这他妈什么啊
What the fuck?
哦我的天
Oh Jesus.
你为什么要给我看这个
Why did you show me that?
你♥他♥妈♥为什么要让我看这个 你个混♥蛋♥
Why the fuck did we watch that, you asshole!
我也不知道
I didn't know.
我不知道啊
I didn't know!
我怎么知道他是要
How was I supposed to know
自杀呢
that he was gonna off himself on camera?
她没跟我们说过
She didn't tell us.
她说过 记得吗
She did, remember?
她说过他要见我们
She said he asked for us.
在他自杀之前 她可没说过
Not before he offed himself, she didn't say that!