我爱上的人是奇葩（2014）
You're the Worst S02E06
Part 1
Oct. 14, 2020, 4:37 p.m.
Excuse me!
打断一下
Excuse me!
打断一下
Oh, sorry, Jimmy. Got a protein-load.
抱歉 吉米 得补充蛋白质
Today in improv class,
今天的即兴表演课
we're finally doing Harolds.
我们终于要采用哈罗德结构法了
Anyway, I really like my instructor.
总之 我很喜欢我的指导老师
And after what happened with Lindsay,
跟琳赛发生了那些事后
I think I'm finally ready to let love into my life again.
我觉得我终于准备好重新拥抱爱情了
You've never had love in your life.
你这辈子根本没有过爱情
That's why I need to come up with an excuse
所以我才必须找个借口
to see Dorothy after class.
在课后去找多洛希
So, I was thinking, after stretch and share,
所以我在考虑 做完拉伸和分享之后
I neg her and tell her she looks winded
我就指出她的不足 说她上气不接下气
and that she should sign up for my gym, and that...
说服她跟我一起去健身房♥ 然后...
Edgar, as always, you're overthinking it.
埃德加 你想太多了
For once in your life, just keep it simple.
拜托你这一次就简单一点吧
You mean just ask her out? ?No.?
你是说直接约她出去吗 不是
Get her hammered and finger-bang her in your car.
把她打晕 在你的车里用手指插她
Maybe I should be more direct.
也许我应该更直接一点
I mean, with Lindsay, I got friend-zoned for life.
跟琳赛 我算是一辈子只能当朋友了
One time, she texted me,
有一次她给我发短♥信♥说
"Yo, girl, want to get brunch?"
"哟 闺蜜 要不要去吃早午餐"
Have you noticed something's up with Gretchen?
你有注意到格雷琴哪里不对吗
You mean how she's been sneaking out in the middle of the night?
你是指她老是半夜偷溜出去吗
You knew?
你知道啊
Morning.
早上好
How-how'd you sleep?
睡得好吗
Fine. ?Okay, good.?
挺好 那就好
Why?
为什么问这个
Nothing. You just look a little tired.
没什么 就是你看起来有点累
Cool. Thanks.
好吧 谢谢
Your dick's a weird color.
你的鸡鸡颜色很奇怪
Catch up again tomorrow?
明天再聊呗
I got to go shower.
我得去冲个澡
Sam released Shitstain's chinchilla into Griffith park.
山姆把施斯坦的栗鼠放到格里菲斯公园里去了
This feud's out of control.
他们这次闹得不可开交了
Why don't you just ask Gretchen where she's been going at night?
你为什么不直接问格雷琴她大半夜去哪儿了
Poor, ignorant Edgar.
可怜又无知的埃德加啊
You don't just drop your accusation on a perp
你不能随便指控一个人
without gathering proper forensic evidence first,
除非你先收集到强有力的证据
or they're likely to blow.
否则案子很可能会黄掉的
NCIS LA.
《海军罪案调查处：洛杉矶篇》
Bulbs.
灯泡
Get hot!
热起来啊
My toast is still bread, Paul!
我的吐司还是面包 保罗
What's happening?!
怎么回事啊
Have you been paying the utilities?
你有交水电费吗
You need to come help me.
你得来帮我
Why haven't you cashed any of the checks I sent?
你怎么还没兑现我寄给你的支票
Cash a check?!
兑现支票
Who am I, Lee Iacocca?
我成什么人了 李·艾科卡吗[大企业家]
Well... I guess I could cover your bills this month.
好吧 我可以帮你付这个月的账单
Lindsay, I'm sorry to hear about your power,
琳赛 我很抱歉你家里停电了
but it isn't my problem anymore.
但真的跟我无关了
Hello?
喂
Paul?
保罗
In a long-term relationship, hurt feelings are inevitable.
在长♥期♥关系中 心痛难过是难免的
The trick is being able to communicate that hurt
诀窍在于能够恰当地 建设性地
appropriately and constructively.
沟通这种伤害
Are you guys sure you want me here?
你们确定想让我在这里吗
Yeah, bitch!
当然了 贱♥人♥
This whole feud was your idea.
本次撕逼大战都是你的主意
This feud was not my idea.
根本就不是我的主意
The fake feud was my idea,
我是让你们假撕
and only for crass, commercial reasons.
而且完全是为了广♥告♥效应
Okay, just to be clear, you started a real feud
说直白点 你引发了一场真撕逼
which then became a fake feud,
后来变成了假撕逼
which has now become a real feud again
结果又现在又成了真撕逼
Because the resultant "Dis tracks" have become hurtful?
因为那首歌♥很伤人吗
On this last one,
在最后这首里
Sam called me the black John Turturro.
山姆叫我"黑版约翰·特托罗"
He called me "Skinny fat."
他叫我"瘦肥猪"
Y'all told Fire 103 I let a dude suck my dick!
你们对《火103》杂♥志♥爆料 我让一个男的给我舔屌♥
You did let a dude suck your dick. ? Guys.?
你就是让男人给你舔过啊 各位
Remember, we're just pretending to be mad.
记住 我们只是在假装生气
You guys still need to be working on new music
你们还是要创作新音乐
for when we stage the big reunion!
等接下来宣布和好时推出啊
Bitch, I'm going solo.
贱♥人♥ 我要单飞
I could take a dookie that would chart higher
我随便搞点东西出来 在榜上的排名都会高于
than anything I ever did with crustache over here
我和这个蠢货以及那个SAT考800分的傻♥逼♥
And Mr. 800-on-his-sats.
合作搞出来的作品
I told you that in confidence. ? Whatever.?
我叫你不要告诉别人的 无所谓了
Forget you tricks! I'm done.
算了 我受够了
May I use the remaining time
我能用剩下的时间
to talk about my parents' divorce?
聊聊我父母的离婚事件吗
Dad, I told you that we'd have a great time at the museum.
老爸 我说了我们会在博物馆里玩得很开心的
Yeah, but where were all these boobs at?!
是啊 但是那些大奶妹都哪里去了
And blackout!
退场
?Great class, you guys! Really good today.?
你们好棒 今天真的表现很棒
Good class. Good class.
你们班太棒了 非常好
Good work.
表现很好
Um, so listen.
听我说
I think you're funny and cute, and I'd like to take you out
我觉得你幽默 很可爱 我想带你出去
on a date with me for-for a date.
跟我约个会 当作约会
Is this a bit?
这是个梗吗
I don't think so,
我觉得不是
but I'm still not 100% sure what a bit is.
但我还是不太确定梗是什么意思
Wait, are you asking me on a date?
等等 你是想找我出去约会吗
No.
不是
Uh, you want to get drunk and hang out in my car?
你想喝醉酒 在我的车里玩玩吗
No. Please don't take it back.
不 别收回
You know guys don't do that, right?
你知道男生一般不这样吧
At least not comedy guys.
至少搞喜剧的男生不这样
I mean, I might get a text that's like, "You up?"
我一般会收到他们的短♥信♥直接说 "约吗"
That's how comedy dudes ask you out. They joke.
搞喜剧的男生都是这样约人出去的 他们很爱开玩笑
Like, "Wouldn't it be so funny
比如"如果你来我家
if you came over and were sucking my dick?"
舔我大屌♥会不会很好玩"
And then, next thing you know,
然后就是 你懂的
you've joked yourself into sucking their dick.
玩笑开着开着 你就真的去舔屌♥了
Uh, so, is-is that a no?
所以 你这是拒绝我了吗
No! You just broke my brain a little bit. Yes.
不是 你只是让我懵了一下 我答应
Uh, you want to go somewhere right now?
你想现在出去吗
Thanks again for picking me up.
再次感谢你来接我
How is a person supposed to know they have to put oil in their car?
一个人要怎么知道何时该给车加油呢
There's a little oil can light on your dashboard.
你的仪表盘上有个小小的油量指示灯
Paul took care of all that garbage.
一直都是保罗在负责车的
And now I don't have power, I don't have hot water,
现在我家里没电 没热水
I don't have TV!
甚至连电视都没有
I'm like a frontiers woman.
我简直就是原始部落的女人
I'm like Reese Witherspoon in that commercial for backpacks.
我就像那个背包广♥告♥里的瑞茜·威瑟斯彭
Right. Lindsay, I asked you to lunch for a reason.
好了 琳赛 我请你吃午饭是有原因的
Gretchen keeps sneaking out in the middle of the night.
格雷琴最近总是半夜溜出去
Do you know where she's going?
你知道她去哪里了吗
Probably got a side bitch.
可能在外面有小三了吧
I don't think she has a... a side bitch. Oh, Jimmy.
我不觉得她有 小三了 吉米
Let me tell you how relationships work.
我来跟你说说恋爱是怎么回事吧
You cheat,
你出轨
and then she cheats, and then, one day you wake up,
然后她出轨 然后有一天你醒来
and he's gone, none of your stuff works,
发现他走了 你的东西都不能用了
and you're having crabby puffs with some British guy.
只能和某个英国佬一起吃蟹肉泡芙
我爱上的人是奇葩（2014）
You're the Worst
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