工作狂（2011）
Workaholics S06E10
Part 2
June 29, 2021, 9:02 a.m.
一点都不好 你的故事都是这样
It was bad, and they always are.
失败又乏味
That's the thing about your stories.
我不是针对你 - 包裹到家了
And no offense... - Package is at the house.
包裹到家了 我们走吧
Package is at the house. Let's go.
现在快五点了吧 我们能走了 走吧
It's almost 5:00, right? We can go, right? Let's go.
走啊 - 那好吧
Let's go. - All right, yeah.
这才对啊
Now we're talking.
不错
All right.
呜呼
Whoo!
包裹不在这儿
It's not here.
啊 - 包裹不在这儿
Huh? - It's not here!
什么 - 你什么意思
What? - What are you talking about?
那在哪呢 - 行了 别慌
Where is it? - Okay. Don't panic.
可能是哪个邻居签收了
Probably had a neighbor signed for it.
对 可能是这样
Yeah. That's probably what it is.
没必要慌张
No reason to panic.
嘿 - 你好
Hey. - Hello.
Dean 最近怎么样啊
Dean, how's it going?
我们想问问你有没有替我们签收了个包裹
We're just wondering if you signed for a package for us?
没啊 我什么都没签收
No. I didn't sign for anything.
包裹可能是被偷了吧
Packages probably got stolen.
我最近被偷了好多
I've had a bunch taken recently.
亲爱的 你能把狗叫过去吗
Honey, can you call the dogs?
摇一摇餐盒
Shake the treat box.
摇一摇餐盒 不好意思
Shake the treat box! Sorry.
要不去邻里联防问问
I'd say maybe try the neighborhood watch,
虽然他们最近挺没用的
although they've been fairly useless recently.
对了 要不这样吧
Yeah. Hey, you know what?
我们应该自己建一个治安小组
We should start a vigilante group of our own
来捉住这个偷包裹的 - 我靠
to catch this guy. - God damn it!
Vicki 把餐盒摇一摇
Shake the treat box, Vicki!
兄弟 我说真的
No. I'm serious, man.
我们可以像超级英雄一样 我们可以穿戏服
We could be, like, superheroes. We could wear costumes.
或者我们可以不♥穿♥
Ah, or we couldn't wear costumes
因为这个主意傻透了 对吧Ders
'cause it's a dumb idea, right, Ders?
对
Yup.
真不愧是我最好的朋友
And that's why you're my best friend.
所以我才爱你啊 - 好吧
That's why I love you, man. - Great.
我说真的 Deano 你什么被偷了
I really do. Hey, Deano, what got stolen?
老兄 我订了个超屌♥的充气椅子
Dude, I ordered this awesome inflatable chair,
还有个牛仔靴形状的杯子
this cowboy boot-shaped mug.
你们几个有空可以过来坐坐
You guys should come over sometime.
我们可以一起喝喝酒 看看比赛
We can do beers, watch a Blues game.
好啊 没准哪天我们就来了
Yeah. You know, maybe we will.
谢谢你的帮忙
And thanks for the help today. Appreciate it.
好吧 祝你们好运了 - 谢谢
Well, good luck, guys. - Yeah, thanks.
你是个好人
You're a good guy.
他确实不错
He is a good guy.
好吧好吧
Okay, yeah.
我从Dean那偷了点东西
I stole some things from Dean.
我们得抓住这个偷包裹的家伙
We need to trap this guy who stole our package
把我们的东西拿回来 我就能"发泄"了
and get our tape back so I can evacuate.
所以治安小组这个主意很棒啊
And that's why vigilante group is a great idea.
听这个名字怎么样
Check it out.
海扁侠 - 我不喜欢
Beat-Ass. - I don't like that.
跟海扁王一个意思啊 - 不一样
That's just Kick-Ass. - No.
对 就是海扁啊
Yeah. It's Kick-Ass, basically.
Adam 你说的我都听见了
Adam, I heard you, since you had this conversation
因为你就站在我家门口
on my front step.
我想拿回我的东西 哥们
I want my stuff back, buddy.
快跑 快跑
Scoot! Scoot!
撤 撤 - 快跑
Go, go! - Scoot!
再见 Dean
Bye, Dean!
你被埋在地里了 - 是啊
All right. So you're buried in the ground. - I am, yes.
现在我要把这纸箱放在你头上
Now, I'm gonna put this box over your head, right,
然后在纸箱上写着
and I wrote "Valuable electronics:
"贵重电器 请勿触碰"
do not touch" On it.
当他拿这箱子的时候 你就
When he takes the box...
朝他喷制暴喷雾 - 对
Spray him with the mace. - Yeah.
与此同时 我和Blake埋伏在车里
Meanwhile, Blake and I, we're gonna be over here in the 'Vo.
接着我们跳出来 打他个措手不及
We're gonna jump out. We're gonna pounce.
不不不 Gnargoyle可不会坐在车里
No, no, no, no, no. Gnargoyle doesn't sit in cars.
我已经跟你说过了 他栖于城市高处
I already told you this. He perches high above the city,
当城市需要他时 他会沿飞索疾冲而下
and then swoops down on his zip line when the city needs him.
你衣服上印着 "舔屁"
Your shirt says "Eat ass."
什么
What?
见鬼
Oh, God dang it.
这B老是掉
The "B" Keeps falling off.
一个成天忙着舔屁的人
Hey, how are you gonna be fighting crime
如何打击犯罪活动
when you're busy eating ass all day?
等到海扁侠从天而降
You're not gonna be laughing when the Gnargoyle swoops down
替天行道的时候 你就笑不出来了
and wreaks vigilante justice upon the city.
你想知道还有哪些事情不那么可笑吗
Yeah. You want to know what else isn't funny?
我创建了海扁侠的脸书主页
Made a Facebook page for Beat-Ass.
已经有两个赞了 - 好酷
Already got two likes. - That's cool.
你在网上找到了两个
You found two guys on the Internet
想要聚在一起相互舔屁的家伙
who wanted to get together and eat each other's butts.
酷毙了
Very cool.
简直是今日最佳
Oh! That was the best one yet.
罪恶在潜伏
Evil lurks in Cucamonga.
英雄在等待
A hero waits.
他已迫不及待想要给对手一记飞腿
His lower thigh's really starting to hurt from perching.
在吗 弟兄们
Hey, guys?
我饿了
I'm getting hungry.
有谁能给我做个烤奶酪吗
Can one of you go make me a grilled cheese?
嘘 安静
Shh! Quiet!
你这样会把事情搞砸的 你能相信吗
You're gonna ruin this. You believe this guy?
这家伙像个第一次盯梢的菜鸟一样
It's like this is his first stakeout or something.
闭嘴 有人来了 有人来了
Shut up. Someone's coming. Someone's coming.
开始行动了吗 - 嗯
Is it on? - Yeah.
准备好了 我们大干一场吧
We're ready. Let's do this.
我看到他了
I've got visual,
看起来像个黑人 穿着件卫衣
and it looks like a black guy in a hoodie.
可能是我们的目标
It's probably our guy, man.
黑人穿件卫衣又不犯法 好吗
Being black and wearing a hoodie is not a crime, okay?
得了吧
Come on.
我知道 我不是说那个
No. No, no. I know. I'm not saying that.
我是说 显然他可能是任何人
I'm saying obviously, he could be anybody.
他可能是牙医或是法官
He could be a dentist or a judge
也可能是贝莱尔街区的富豪什么的
or a Prince of Bel-Air or something.
这下头太脏了
Crazy dirty down here.
凌空飞踢
Flying drop kick attack!
好了 好了
Hey. Okay. Okay.
我们知道你是强盗 快把黄♥片♥交出来
We know you're the robber, so just give us the porno.
没错
Yeah.
什么 我只是来这里加入海扁侠团队
What? I'm here to join a group called Beat-Ass.
你通过了
Oh, you made it.
欢迎加入海扁侠
Welcome to Beat-Ass HQ.
这是几根手指 几根
How many? How many fingers am I holding up? How many?
16根 - 你现在开心了吧
16? - Are you happy?
你那朋友毁了我们的计划 还把Adam弄瞎了
Your friend over here ruined our plan and blinded Adam.
他有名字的
Okay. He has a name, all right,
只是我还不知道
which I don't know, actually.
你叫什么名字 朋友
What is your name, friend?
我的真名是Brian
My real name's Brian,
不过我的超级英雄名字是治愈博士
but my superhero name is Dr. Heals-good.
非常正能量的名字
Okay. Very positive.
我的英雄名字是Gnargoyle
Mine is actually the Gnargoyle.
Blake - 怎么了
Hey, Blake. - What?
一切都是那么美好
It's all well and good,
工作狂（2011）
Workaholics
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