单身毒妈（2005）
Weeds S05E11
Part 2
Nov. 25, 2020, 12:50 p.m.
Or Gore, when he beat global warming?
是昏昏沉沉的吗
We're going into battle with a formidable opponent.
我们要面对的是个强大的对手
We have to be our very best.
所以得全力以赴
Then we can fuck that bitch up good so she stays fucked up.
然后 治得她永无翻身之能
So for now, we back off the weed.
所以这段时间就别抽大♥麻♥了
How do you have a cell phone?
你怎么会有手♥机♥
I always got the newest shit.
我总能搞到最新款
What, you want me to hook you up?
干嘛 想让我帮你拉生意
No. I'm in the middle of a contract. AT&T
算了 我跟AT&T签约了
Those fuckers tried to give me a hard time, too,
那些狗♥娘♥养♥的也想给我小鞋穿
so I had a friend visit
我有一朋友
the call center up in Burnsville, Minnesota.
去了明尼苏达州伯恩斯维尔的分公♥司♥
You should mention my name, ask for Bill Sondergaard.
你跟他报我名字 找比尔·桑德迦
He'll be the one that
他讲话听起来
sounds like he's talking through a broken jaw.
像下巴断了一样
Does this mean you're gonna help me with my little problem?
这么说 你答应帮忙了
See, now, about that. Pilar Zuazo.
听着 那个皮拉·祖阿
She's Manny Ramirez.
她可是个上层阶级
You a peewee-league pitcher.
你只是个小人物
Got to wonder, what the fuck you doing on the mound?
我就不懂了 你鸡蛋碰石头有啥好处
I get it. You can't do shit. You're locked up.
知道了 你搞不定 你还在号♥子里
Don't get it twisted, mami. I'm still working.
别会错意了 老子人脉广着呢
I'm just telecommuting for now.
只是暂时用电♥话♥联♥系♥而已
Well, can you do it or not?
那你到底帮不帮
I don't know. Depends if you can help me out.
说不准 就看你能不能搞定我的事
Help get my case transferred to Mexico.
帮忙把这案子转到墨西哥
See, that tunnel that you shut down
你封掉的那条隧♥道♥
Nasty rumor.
纯属无中生有
It spanned two countries.
那隧♥道♥可跨越两国边境
Thanks to you,
真得感谢你
the last of the American agents who
最后一个能指证
could testify as to which side I was standing on -
我的美国探员
He's dead now.
也死了
So?
所以呢
So I need someone with high-level Mexi-juice
所以现在需要一个墨西哥高♥官♥
to help get my case transferred down there.
帮我把这案子转到墨西哥
And then what?
然后呢
Then I'm David Blaine in Mexico.
到了墨西哥我就能变成大卫·布莱恩
I slide under doors in Mexico.
能从门底下溜走
How do I know you're not gonna come after me?
我哪知道你出来会不会报复我
Blanca, we're like one of those YouTube videos -
白种妞 我俩就像优酷上那个视频里演的
You know, where a tiger and a duck get all confused.
老虎跟鸭子开始都有点拎不清
They become friends.
后来糊里糊涂的做了朋友
And, you know, it seems okay, but...
表面上看起来和和睦睦
you never really know, do you?
但天知道心里都有什么如意算盘
God, I hated anatomy.
天呐 我讨厌解剖学
Memorizing all 206 bones in the body is not easy.
要记住人体206块骨头真困难
Wow, your hands feel good.
你功力不错嘛
That's my fibula.
这是腓骨
See? I still got it. Oh, yeah.
看 我还记得 好吧
What was I saying? Wonderful, interesting things.
我刚说了什么 奇妙有趣的东西
That's my tibia. Okay. Silence.
这是胫骨 好了 别说了
But I was gonna tell you about my year in Yemen.
但我想跟你聊聊在也门一年的经历
Yemen can wait.
这个不急
Patella.
膝盖骨
Okay, Audra. I mean Andy. Andy.
好吧 安德拉 我是说安迪 是安迪
I just called you "Audra." I know.
我刚刚叫你安德拉 我知道
Femur.
股骨
Trochanter.
股骨转子
Femoral neck.
股骨颈骨
Femoral head.
股骨头
Oh, God.
天呐
Okay.
好吧
No, no, no, no.
别 别
This is what I do.
我要这么玩
So just you lay back.
你躺好就行
This is embarrassing.
真够难为情的
Never mind.
不管了
Look, I've been single for a while, so my
我很久没跟别人做了 所以
battery-powered helpers have made it difficult -
自♥慰♥器用多了会难以...
That didn't shoot out of you, right?
这不会让你没兴致了吧
It's Gayle. He must have followed us. Fuck.
肯定是盖尔 居然跟踪我们 草
He brought some friends. Holy shit!
他还带了人来 他妈的
Let's call the police.
赶快报♥警♥吧
I knew it was a bad idea having you pick me up.
我就知道不该让你来接我
Gayle has a thing for me.
盖尔对我有想法
If you love something, throw tomatoes at it.
爱它就扔它番茄吧
Oh, now I'm gonna have to move again. Seriously?
看来我又得搬家了 不是吧
I'm always moving.
我搬家超频繁的
They find out where I live, and I move again.
每次他们找上门 我都得搬家
They're dangerous, Andy.
他们不好惹 安迪
Why don't you stay with me
如果再搬
while you figure out your next move?
干脆搬来跟我住好了
What? No, I can't. I got a big house.
什么 不行 我家房♥子很大
You'd get your own room.
你可以独享一间
Me and the general got you into this, so...
是我和 将军 把你害成这样的
just... Why don't you think about it, okay?
你就 考虑考虑 好不
What are you doing?
你要干嘛
If you don't climax, the terrorists win.
如果你没高♥潮♥ 这群疯子可就赢了
Can't let that happen.
这可万万不能
A Baja federal judge is holding that up.
巴哈联邦法官死拽着那点事儿不放
Well, can you ask him to un-hold it?
那你能不能让他松手
You should not have been visiting
你不该去探视
Guillermo Garcia Gomez in jail.
吉列尔莫·加西亚·戈麦斯
We have a history.
我们有点儿交情
I'd come and visit you, too,
如果你进了号♥子 我也会探视的
smuggle in gold chains, shiny shirts.
顺便给你捎点儿金链子靓衫啥的
Well, hi, honey. Can I make you something?
宝贝 想吃点啥不
Do you know how to make beer?
你会酿啤酒吗
You're not having any more beer.
不准再喝啤酒了
That was a special occasion. You got shot.
上次是情况特殊 你中枪了
I know. I'm kidding.
我知道 开玩笑的
Like it or not, we all have
不管你喜不喜欢
to work together now. It's for our own safety.
我们在一条船上 这也是为了你好
Why don't you stick to breast-feeding?
你干嘛不坚持喂母乳
Well, fuck you. Just do it.
靠 做你的事
Good.
很好
And you can't kill him. If anyone gets hurt,
还有 不准灭口 一旦有人受伤
I'm telling Esteban how you tried to shoot me,
我就告诉埃斯特万你设计杀我的事
and his heart will break all over you.
他肯定会对你完全绝望
I'm good at killing.
我最在行的就是杀人了
No killing. Life's a drag.
别杀人 大家活着都不容易
Oh. Come on. Big baby.
来吧 大号♥宝宝
Seriously, tell me why we're really here, or I'm leaving.
说吧 干嘛带我来这 不然我走了
Well, now that I'm a giant success,
我现在事业成功
I want to pamper myself.
想挥霍挥霍
And I want to extend the pampering experience to my child,
也想带我孩子挥霍
whose company I enjoy.
你又是我最喜欢的
She'll take a bottle of the Sebastian shaper spray,
给她拿瓶圣巴斯汀定型喷雾
'cause she's my salon buddy.
咱俩母女可亲如姐妹
Wait. Fine, fine. Fine.
等等 好吧 好吧
I want to apologize.
我想跟你道歉
When you told me you were gay... I didn't react well.
你说你是拉拉时我反应过度了
You told me you would take
你不是说要把我
my rug-munching ass to reparative therapy.
丢到疯人院去吗
Well, that was old mommy. I'm new mommy.
当时我是传统老妈 现在是潮流新妈
New mommy is a nice mommy.
新妈是个开明的妈妈
Anyway, I thought that maybe you could,
不管那些了 你能不能
you know, tell me a little bit about it -
跟我说说
about being lesbionic.
当拉拉什么感觉
单身毒妈（2005）
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