半独立屋（2020）

格拉斯顿伯里音乐节
until she's 18!
你知道在音乐节上会发生什么吗 斯图尔特
Do you know what happens at festivals, Stuart?
-不知道 -她会喝醉
- No. - She'll drink too much,
她可能会吸毒
she'll probably take drugs,
最后肯定会和一个吉他手睡在一起...
and no doubt end up sleeping with a guitarist from...
可能是七号♥棚乐队
I don't know, Shed Seven.
你觉得这会让我看起来怎么样
How do you think that's going to make me look?
就像你回到90年代一样
Like you've gone back to the '90s.
好 那就巫师乐队
All right, then. The Shamen.
还是90年代
'90s.
今天对我来说很重要
This is an important day for me.
新议员为英勇的孩子们献了一份力
New MP does her bit for heroic kids.
我想和女儿一同出席 这对我的形象有利
I wanted to be seen with my daughter. It's good for the image.
谢谢 斯图尔特 非常感谢
Thanks, Stuart. Thanks a bunch!
-秃头猪 -这个词好 小帕
- Wanker. - Nice one, Pat.
-你也是 -没错
- You as well. - Righto.
拜托 凯特 打起精神来 我再给我们倒杯酒
Come on, Kate, pull yourself together. I'll get us another drink.
你会喝醉的
You'll be sick.
我觉得你最好滚出我的家
I think you'd better get the hell out of my casa, chum.
好
Right.
你好 罗恩
Hi, Ron.
我需要我的平板电脑
Need my iPad.
《寻找红十月》
Hunt For Red October.
经典曲目
Classic.
我被从凯特赶出来了
It's all kicking off at Kate's.
我和你一样 罗恩 最好低调一点[低着头]I'm like you, Ron. Best to keep your head down.
对吗 罗恩
All right, Ron?
罗恩
Ron?
糟糕 该死
Fuck. Oh, fuck.
罗恩 别死 罗恩
Ron, don't be dead, Ron.
老天啊 你死了
Oh, bloody hell, you are dead!
凯特
Oh, Kate...
我们要怎么办 罗恩
What are we going to do, Ron?
没时间处理你了
Haven't really got time for this.
无意冒犯
No offence.
你们有两个人
There are two of you.
是的
Yeah.
我不介意
I don't mind.
好的
Ok.
要我先开头吗
Should I start?
开什么头
Start what?
看你想怎么开
Whatever you like.
你想怎么样
What do you want?
你想怎么样
What do you want?
我想去上班
I want to get to work.
我准备好了 就等你了
I'm ready when you are.
罗恩死了
Ron's dead.
情趣角色扮演
Kinky role-play.
我擅长
I'm game.
给你 斯图
Here she is, Stu.
蓝药已经给过了
Now, she's had her blue.
十分钟之后再给红药
She'll need the red in about ten minutes.
好了 罗恩
All right, Ron!
我在厨房♥里放了个袋子 里面都是照顾她要用的东西
I've left a bag with all her gubbins in the kitchen.
钥匙在老地方
Key's in the usual place.
有问题打个电♥话♥就行
Any problems, give us a tinkle.
我不想冒犯你 不过
I don't mean to be rude, but...
你到底是谁
who the hell are you?
无鞍野马78
Bareback78.
好吧
Right.
你是 苏格兰高地舞吗
You're... Highland Fling?
不
Oh, no.
天哪
God!
你找的是我爸
You want me dad.
这下尴尬了
Oh. This is embarrassing.
他在上厕所
He's at number 2.
好吧
Ok.
他真的...
Is he really...?
算了
Never mind.
天哪
Oh, God.
走吧 道尔
Here we go, Doyle.
你胆子够大的
You've got a bloody nerve.
你好 小帕 我能进来吗
Hi, Pat. Can I come in?
你怎么抱着只猫
Why have you got a cat?
-我真的需要和泰德谈谈 -他在厕所
- I really need to speak to Ted. - He's on the toilet.
介意我进来吗
Do you mind if I come in?
她还是没来
She's still not coming.
我们要迟到了
We're going to be so late.
抱歉 凯特
I'm so sorry, Kate.
道尔怎么在你手上
Why have you got Doyle?
她臭死了
She stinks!
这周末是我来照顾她
I've got her for the weekend.
斯图尔特 我知道你是好意
Stuart, I know you mean well,
但你真的打乱了我今天的安排
but you've really buggered up my day.
-我知道 -我不会的 小帕
- I know. - I wouldn't, Pat.
用楼上那个
Use the one upstairs.
好了 你准备好我们就出发
Right, ready when you are.
这又是怎么了
Oh, christ, what is it now?
-我有话和你说 泰德 -那就说吧
- I really need a word, Ted. - Go on, then.
有点
It's a bit...
-不太好开口 -说吧
- delicate. - Go on, then.
到底怎么了
What's the matter?
这算是
It's sort of...
男人方面的问题
man's problems.
就不能等等吗
God, can't this wait?
我们就不能聊两句吗
Can we just have a quick chat?
那就快点
Hurry up!
到底怎么了 混♥蛋♥
Well, what is it, dickhead?
-他死了 -谁死了
- He's dead. - Who is?
-罗恩 -滚
- Ron. - Fuck off!
你得出来一下
You need to come outside.
天哪
Jesus!
马上回来
Back in a sec!
快点 告诉爸爸我们准备好出发了
Well, hurry up. And tell Dad we're ready to go!
我不希望让别人发现他这个样子
I didn't want anyone finding him like this.
是吗 但你很乐意让我来处理这烂摊子
Oh, but you're happy for me to deal with it?
我了解你 而且他说不定没死
Knowing you, he's probably not even dead.
天哪 他真死了
Oh, God, he is dead.
我跟你说了 我真的得去上班了
I told you. I really need to get to work.
你得告诉凯特
You're going to have to tell Kate.
你去告诉她 你找到他的
You tell her. You found him.
我真的需要这份工作 而且她是你老婆
I really need this job. And, anyway, she's your wife.
-她先是你老婆 -拜托 泰德
- She was your wife first. - Oh, please, Ted.
-好吧 我告诉她 -谢了
- All right, I'll tell her. - Thanks.
抱歉 罗恩
Sorry, Ron.
有一个条件
On one condition.
格拉斯顿伯里音乐节的事情没完没了了
We're never going to hear the end of this Glastonbury bollocks.
-你要带玛丹娜去 -我讨厌音乐节
- So you're going to have to take Madonna. - I hate festivals.
-而且一张票要250块 -就这样了 你看着办
- And it's 250 quid a ticket! - There it is. Take it or leave it.
是因为我吐在你脸上了吗
Is this because I threw up in your face?
直接吐到我嘴里了
It went straight in my mouth.
-我付不起 -不管 时间不等人
- I can't afford it. - Boo-hoo. Clock's ticking.
好吧
All right.
斯图尔特
Stuart!
斯图 我真的需要你帮忙 可以吗 泰德
Stu, I really need your help. All right, Ted?
-我没时间 -这事很重要
- I haven't got time! - This is really important.
-拿一下 -别给他啊
- Hold them for a second. - Get off!
-快快快 -我还要去工作
- Come on, come on, come on. - I've got to get to work!
装作正常 装作正常
Just act normal, just act normal.
-怎么了 -你就装作正常
- What's going on? - Just act normal.
等你进去看