9号秘事

哦，这就是你想要的吗？
Oh, is that what you want?
"早上好，老师"
"Good morning, sir."
这位女士是一名护士！
This lady is a nurse!
不久前
It wasn't so long ago
我们站在街上歌♥颂他们的努力
we were standing in the street applauding their efforts.
或者，你根本就没在意过？
Or maybe you never bothered?
是，也许我从没在意过
No, maybe I never did.
你有敲锅抗♥议♥者的名单吗？
Do you have a list of everyone who banged a pan?
哦，政♥府♥知道，他们什么都看到了
Oh, the Government do. They see everything.
我们至少去了三次，对吧
We were out there at least three times, weren't we, Edith?
不过，那些厨具太他妈重了
Although that Le Creuset was bloody heavy.
也许有一天，有一个受害者
As some day it may happen that a victim must be found
我有一张小清单，我有一张小清单
I've got a little list I've got a little list
社会犯罪者，很可能是地下犯罪的人♥渣♥
Of society offenders who may well be underground
谁也不会漏掉
And who never would be missed
永远不会被漏掉
Who never would be missed
有肮脏的...
There's the pestilential...
我去，这简直就是流浪汉的汉密尔顿
Frig me, it's like Hamilton for hobos.
是《天♥皇♥》里的哦
It's from The Mikado. Oh!
拍手叫好的人
...People who have flabby hands
以及恼人的笑声
And irritating laughs
所有在赶潮流的孩子...
All children who are up in dates and floor you...
谢谢你，亲爱的，够了
Thank you, darling. We'll let you know.
所有握手时...
All persons who in shaking hands...
好了，好了好了，别再装傻了
All right! All right, let's stop playing silly buggers.
打开包，不
Open the bag. No.
好吧，恐怕你必须打开
Well, I'm afraid I'm going to have to insist,
因为你最接近这位女士
because you were closest to this lady
当事件发生时，离我远点
when the incident occurred. Stay the fuck away from me.
不能错过任何可能
They never would be missed.
如果...我能提个建议吗？
If... If I could make a suggestion?
我们来投票，看看大家感想如何
Let's take a vote. See what the general feeling is.
很好
Very good, Edith.
民♥主♥的体现
Democracy manifest.
有人认为...
Everyone who thinks...
对不起，我没记得你的名字
Sorry, I didn't catch your name.
我就没告诉你名字
I didn't give you my name.
我们可以投票决定，是否应该把包拿出检查
Well, we could vote on whether he should.
不，他不必告诉我们名字，没关系
No, he doesn't have to give us his name, it's fine.
哈罗德，我叫哈罗德
Harold. My name's Harold.
你好，哈罗德
Oh, hello, Harold.
我是伊迪丝，这是我丈夫格里
I'm Edith, and this is my husband, Gerry.
你好
Hello.
宾克斯雷蒙德·宾克斯
Binks. Raymond Binks.
我是埃琳娜
I'm Elena.
很高兴见到大家
It's very nice to meet you all.
我儿子的名字叫乔纳森，听着觉得恶心
Well, my boy name is Jonathan urgh, gives me the ick,
但我的艺名
but my drag name
是威尔玛·迪克肖威尔玛......？
is Wilma Dickshow. Wilma...?
迪克肖，好吧
Dickshow. Right.
每月的第一个周四，我都会做别致的午餐（演出）
I do a bottomless brunch first Thursday of every month
在紫袜子酒吧，我想
at the Purple Sock. I know
把你们都列入客人名单
I'll put you all on the guest list.
格里和伊迪丝埃琳娜，你叫什么来着？
Gerry and Edith. Elena. What was your name again?
我不会告诉你我的名字，好吗？
I'm not giving you my name, all right?
该死的，我以为能问出点消息
Oh, damn it. I thought I was going to Columbo him then.
他不必告诉你名字，不用说半个字
He doesn't have to give you his name. He doesn't have to
就因为你妄自尊大
give you anything. Just because you assume authority,
就像一个法♥西♥斯♥混♥蛋♥一样
like the fascist prick that you are.
当警♥察♥介入时
Well, when the police become involved,
我们都得报上自己的名字，不是吗？
we'll all have to give our names, won't we?
我不会的，你告诉他...哦，不好
I won't. You tell him, Cleo... Oh, bum cheeks!
好吧，已经托够久了，有没有人
All right, this has gone on long enough. Is there anybody here
认为我不应该看这个年轻人的包
who thinks I shouldn't look inside this young man's bag,
必要时使用武力？是的！
by force, if necessary? Yes!
别看了
Come on.
有人偷了她的钱包，亲爱的
Well, someone's nicked her purse, darling,
而不是我
and it wasn't me.
看到了吗？
There you are, see?
交出来
Hand it over. Oi, oi!
你在干什么？
What you doing, man?
没有人帮帮我吗？给我
Is no-one going to stand up to him? Give it to me.
谁来阻止他
Someone stop him!
还是我，伙计们
TANNOY: Me again, folks.
对持续断电表示遗憾
Sorry about the continuing loss of power.
我们应该很快就能出发了
We should be on our way fairly shortly.
我们知道发生了一起事件
We are aware there's been an incident
在其中一节车厢
in one of the carriages,
并已通知有关部门
and the proper authorities have been informed.
再一次
Once again,
如有任何不便，我深表歉意
I apologise for any inconvenience caused.
能把报纸还给我吗？
Can I have my newspaper back, please?
哦，对了，不出所料，我得到了 "frock"
Oh, yes. I got "frock", unsurprisingly,
即"叉子"
and "fork".
我想拼 "鸡♥巴♥"
I wanted "cock",
但只有一个C
but there's only one C.
你知道吗，"梅丽尔·斯特里普"
Did you know that "Meryl Streep"
是 "鳗鱼精♥子♥ "的变形？
is an anagram of "try eel sperm"?
它总是让我心痒难耐
It's always tickled me.
司机怎么说？
What did the driver say?
他说马上就会有替代列车
He said there's a replacement service on the way.
应该不会太久
Shouldn't be long now.
看来我上班要迟到了
Well, looks as though I'm going to be late for work.
我真想上班迟到
I'd love to be late for work.
我的工作是全天候的
My job's 24/7.
你的工作？
Your job?
活着就好
Surviving.
你能赚很多钱吗？
Do you make much money going up and down?
不
No.
人们只是觉得难为情，我明白
People are just embarrassed. I get it.
我请求大家慷慨解囊
I'm asking for generosity.
把他们置于是否善良的境地
It puts them in the position of deciding to be kind or not.
你认为人们不善良吗？
Do you think people are not kind?
我想大多数人都不相信我
I think most people don't believe me
当我告诉他们，我一无所有时
when I tell them I've got nothing.
他们认为是个骗局，我只是在撒谎
They think it's a con, I'm just lying.
在医院，我看到的情况恰恰相反
At the hospital, I see the opposite.
许多惊慌失措的人试图理清头绪
Lots of frightened people trying to make sense
发生在他们身上的事情
of what's happening to them.
他们只是想知道
They just really want to know
一切都会好起来，但
that everything's going to be all right, but
有时他们无法接受事实
sometimes they can't accept the truth.
这里...
Here...
你可以拿回你的2英镑
You can have your £2 back.
哦，不，不，你留着吧
Oh, no, no. You keep that.
你确定吗？当然
Are you sure? Hmm. Yeah, course.
希望它能给你带来好运
Hope it brings you luck.
这里说他们正在开展沙拉日活动
Says here they're doing Salad Days
他们的圣诞演出我们要预订吗
for their Christmas show. Shall we book for that, Edie?
节礼日请客？嗯？
Boxing Day treat? Hmm?
我们要为圣诞节预订沙拉日吗？
Shall we book Salad Days for Christmas?
不，我不想看
No. I don't want to see Salad Days.
怎么了？
What's the matter?
我觉得他是个恶霸
I think that man's a bully.
谁？那位老师
Who? The teacher.
为什么总是让他这样的人欺负我们？
Why do we always let people like him bully us?
我们都是人
We're people in our own right.
我们有自己的观点
We have our own opinions.
是的，我们当然知道，但不必说出来
Yes, of course we do, but we don't have to blurt them out
对每个汤姆、迪克和哈罗德都是如此，不是吗？
to every Tom, Dick and Harold, do we?