齐与祖

六月三十号♥星期六
Saturday June 30th
全部搞定
end of story.
那样的话采购必须抓紧了
Then shopping is definitely in order.
其实 我们最好把伴娘团的东西也买♥♥好
In fact, we'd better shop for the entire bridal party!
你要一起吗
Will you be joining us?
不了 谢谢你能想到我 但我得上班
Um, no. Thank you for the thought. I have to work.
奥斯卡会代表我们家和你们一起去
Oscar will be going along to'represent the family.
所以你不需要上班
You don't work?
我会说我现在暂时
Um, I would say I'm temporarily
没有公务缠身
on a leave of absence from official duties.
你没工作
You're unemployed.
这儿是波特兰 失业这件事其实
This is Portland. Unemployment is more like...
非常文艺范
an art form.
我可以一起去买♥♥东西吗
Can I come shopping?
我没听错吧 你想去买♥♥东西
I'm sorry, you want to go shopping?
而且因为这是婚礼准备的一部分
And since we'll be doing wedding stuff
我需要带上我的照相机
I'll need my camera.
我可以拍摄婚礼的筹备过程
I can shoot the wedding planning.
像纪录片那样
Like a documentary.
纪录片可是很有教育意义的
Documentaries are educational.
好吧
Fine.
但是我不希望看到任何
But I don't want any weird
和恐怖沾边的东西 明白吗
horror stuff, alright?
你们想好
Have you thought about
邀请哪些人来伴娘团了吗
who's going to be in your bridal party?
想好了
Oh yes.
马特 马克和约翰会在露那边
Well of course Matt, Mark and John will be on Lu's side.
我会邀请我两个在波特兰的死党
And on my side I'll have my two best friends from Portland
帕特和安琪
Pat and Angie.
祖伊会来当小花童
And Zoe's going to be my flower girl!
只姻为你
你一定就是帕特吧
You're Pat.
你好 我叫帕特里克
Patrick.
很高兴认识你
It's so nice to meet you.
不好意思小家伙们 我答应过你老爸
Oh, no. Sorry guys, but I promised your dad.
不能有任何恐怖元素
No more horror stuff.
出多少钱你们愿意打开那个车门
How much to unlock the'rental car?
10块
How about ten bucks?
我们没那么多钱
We don't have that much.
说不定你们可以自己设法赚到
Maybe you could earn it.
怎么赚
What would we have to do?
现在这么无聊
I think a good prank would be
适合来一个有趣的恶作剧
a timely diversion right about now
我不会恶作剧
I don't know any pranks.
你可以想一个
You'll have to think of one.
好吧
Okay.
我们去店里把她们的衣服藏起来怎么样
What if we go into the shop and hide everybody's clothes?
当她们试完婚纱礼服
And when they're done trying on wedding stuff,
发现自己的衣服都不见了肯定会大喊大叫
all their clothes will be gone and everyone will scream.
就这么干
You're on.
小花童原来在这儿呀
There's my little flower girl!
该你试衣服了 亲爱的
We've got to get you into your dress, dear.
请问下我换下来的衣服应该放哪儿
Um, where do I put my clothes?
我们有专门的服装套
We can put them in a garment bag for you, dear.
好了都藏起来了 该给我车钥匙了吧
Alright, I did it. Now give me the keys.
裙子不错
Nice dress.
我劝你最好不要
I'd keep the comments about the dress
对这裙子妄加评论
to a minimum if I were you.
好了 狼人刚从自己的棺材里爬出来
Okay. The werewolf just climbed out of his coffin
他一个人在街上闲逛
and he's wandering around town lonely.
他想交一些朋友
He wants friends.
但是没人愿意和一个怪物做朋友
But no one will be friends with him because he's a monster.
唯一的办法就是把其他人也变成怪物
The only way he can make friends is if they become monsters too.
所以他得咬这些人
So he has to bite someone.
开拍
Action.
这件好看
Now that is adorable.
还有这件也不错
Oh, and what about this one?
您想试试这件吗 专门给妈妈们设计的
Would you like to try a mother-of-the-bride dress?
太好了
Ooh, that would be lovely!
看上去很显矮
I don't know, it's kind of dumpy.
我觉得这里面没一件
I don't feel like any of these
符合我的气质
really capture my true personality.
你得先爬到高处然后突然跳下来
You have to get higher up.
你穿这件真的会很好看
But this would look lovely on you!
妈 你知道我不♥穿♥裙子的
Mom, you know I don't wear dresses.
按理说你也不会结婚的 露
You don't normally get married either Lu
但我希望你可以为你人生中最特别的
but I was hoping you could make an exception
这一天破例一次嘛
for the most elaborate day of your life.
来 亲爱的
Now darling
你穿上这个绝对美得不可方物
this would look absolutely fabulous on you.
是不是美得说不出话了
Doesn't it just leave you at a loss for words?
是的
Yes.
这才是我
Now this is me.
不好意思 你穿这个可不行
Excuse me, but that is out of the question.
我们办的是要系黑色领带的传统婚礼
We are planning a classic, black tie wedding.
在波特兰吗
Oh, in Portland?
我好像没有黑色领带
I don't think I own a black tie.
这可是你侄女的婚礼 没有就去买♥♥啊
Well, it's your niece's wedding. You can buy one.
如果帕特穿那件 那我就要穿这件
If Pat gets to wear that, I want to wear this.
想象一下它配上一双军靴
Picture it with combat boots.
绝对不行
Absolutely not.
一定要穿有袖子的衣服
What We're going to need for her is something with sleeves.
打断一下
Excuse me
我感觉你一点都没有尊重我的
but I feel like my accouterment preferences are not being..
个人喜好
respected?
我能穿短裤 他为什么不能穿裙子
I mean, I'm wearing pants. Why can't he wear a dress?
凭什么她能穿短裤 我不能
How come she gets to wear pants and I don't?
你现在是这样的 但我希望你是这样的
Hey. You're at a here, and I need to see you at a here.
我就想穿这件有水钻的
I'd also be willing to wear the blue taffeta
塔夫绸裙子
with rhinestones.
也许大家都应该穿一身黑
Maybe everyone should wear all black.
一般来说 我觉得水钻特别俗
Ordinarily I think rhinestones are super tacky
但这是婚礼 所以我们就该亮晶晶的
but this is a wedding, and we have to sparkle.
你是谁啊 自♥由♥主义者吗
Who are you, Liberace?
我只是想让每个人都觉得舒服
I just want everyone to feel comfortable..
穿那玩意儿就舒服了
Comfortable? In that?
我可在时尚六月刊上看过一模一样的打扮
Hey, I saw this exact same look in the June issue of Vogue.
穿在男人还是女人身上呢
On a man or a woman?
我就跟你说我们该私奔的
I told you we should have eloped.
为了中和一下帕特骚气的陪酒服
I volunteer to wear a tuxedo
我自愿穿燕尾服
to balance out Pat's slutty barmaid costume.
这才不是骚气的陪酒服
It's not a slutty barmaid costume
这是礼服耶
it's a gown!
我绝对不要穿裙子
I am not wearing a dress!
这不是你们决定扮男扮女的一天
This is not just choose your favorite gender day!
我们是有规则的
There are RULES.
衣服袋哪儿去了
Where are the garment bags?
你说发货柜里的
The ones in the shipping closet?
半小时前我拿到快递车上了
I sent them out on the delivery truck half an hour ago.
我根本就没把它们放进发货柜啊
I didn't hang them in the shipping closet.
我明明把它们放在试衣间了
I hung them in the dressing rooms.
那里面不是礼服
Those were not gowns.
是每个人穿来的衣服
Those were everyone's clothes!
开拍
Action!
离我远点 离我远点 离我远点
Get off of me! Get off of me,get off of me, get off of me
我今天要宰了你这小兔崽子
I will put you in your grave, little man!
妈 妈
Mom! Mom!
我会赢的 我会赢的
I will win! I will win..
毁坏的财物共计五千元
The damage comes to $5,000 in ruined property.
你连去给婚礼做采购
You can't even go wedding dress shopping
都要被逮捕吗