纪念品：第一部分

How are you getting on?
我要出门一或两小时
I'm going out for an hour or two.
你能借我十块钱吗
Can you lend me a tenner?
可以
Yeah.
-你呆家里吗 -是的
- You staying here? - Mmm-hmm.
等会见
See you later.
这些都说得通吗
Does all this make sense?
说得通
Mmm-hmm. Yeah.
没有模糊不清的吧
Nothing looks unclear?
应该没有
Don't think so.
我想把她做出来
I think get her to do that for real.
我是说 如果必要的话可以把她缠起来
I mean, tangle her up if necessary.
好的
Okay.
你不想让它看起来很做作
You don't want it to look stagey...
对
Mmm-hmm.
因为这整件事
...because the whole thing is,
你知道的 都是有意的做作
you know, stagey in intention.
你今天记分了吗
Did you score today?
没 别问我这件事
No. Don't ask me that.
没有
No.
因为我感觉你好像有事
'Cause I feel like you're on something right now.
好吧
Well...
我没有
I'm not.
-我觉得你有事 -我没有
- Well, I think you are. - Well, I'm not.
因为你表现的不像自己
Because you're not yourself.
怎么了
What?
-好吧 我是说 -别
- Well, I mean... - Don't...
别说谎 安东尼 我知道你是
Don't lie, Anthony. I know that you're...
我知道你对于我什么时候应该
I know you have a received version
表现成什么样有一个标准版本
of who I am supposed to be at any one time.
我没有 这
I don't... That's not...
但是没人有这个标准版
But nobody has...
你知道吗 我
You know? I have...
你比任何人都了解
You more than anyone should understand
人们在不同时间
that people go through different emotions
处理不同情绪
at different times of the day,
感受不同事物 就会表现出不同样子
and feel different things and behave in different ways.
我知道 但是我了解你
I know that, but I know you,
并且我也知道这不是你平常的样子
and I know this is not what you're like sometimes.
我觉得你太紧张了
I think you're nervous,
你有点担心眼前的这个任务
and I think you're trying to distract yourself
所以试图分散注意力
from your fear of the task ahead,
我觉得你要放松下来
and I think you just need to relax
确保自己做好了准备
and make sure you're prepared...
我准备好了 这 这就是在准备啊
I am prepared. I am. This is... This is preparing.
朱莉 我要怎么拿这个
Julie, what am I doing with this?
就大概
Um, just kind of...
这么弄
Do a little, um...
-没事吧 -嗯嗯
- You okay? - Yep, yep. Um...
我想说 那又不在框内
Well, I mean, it's not in shot.
她拿那个干嘛呢
Why's she doing anything with it?
-我们拍的是头发 -哦 好吧
- We're filming the hair. - Oh, yeah, okay. Um...
嗯 那把它放桌上就好
Yeah, let's just put it on the table
你就不用拿着了
so you don't have to hold it.
行
True.
稍微往这边转一点
Okay, let's bring this round a bit
才更有特写的感觉 怎么了
so it's a bit more profile-y. Sorry?
不能再转了
Can't pull it any further round.
不 不 是另一边
No, no, the other way.
转到左边 灯的左边
To the left. Lamp left.
我把这些夹子放上去托住
I've just put these clips in, just to hold.
完美 就是这样
Perfect. Perfect, yep, yep.
希望拍到这里的时候
Hopefully when we're ready to go here,
我希望能
I can hopefully...
-嗯哼 -嗯
- Mmm-hmm. - Yeah.
卷得更紧一点
And have a tighter curl.
-好 -等等
- Okay. - Hold on.
还行吧
This is sort of all right.
不 挺好的啊
No, it's great.
-对不起 -天哪
- Oh, sorry. - For fuck's sake.
对不起 对不起
Sorry, sorry.
小心点
Just be careful.
还可以再拍几张
It's okay for a few more takes.
嗯 我们只需要再拍一张
Yeah, yeah, we only need another,
我的意思是 一两张就好
I mean, another one or two takes.
你觉得呢 我们要拍几张
Do you think? How many takes do you think we'll do?
一根绳子有多长呢
Well, how long is a piece of string?
我们拍到满意为止 行吗
We shoot till we've got it, right?
好 行
Okay, yeah.
如果那样的话我们得重新弄一下
But we will need to reset if that's the case.
好 我们确保造型能够保持
Yeah, okay, we'll make sure that it's... It will stay.
-嗯 -你知道的
- Yeah. - You know.
你还好吗
Are you all right?
没有 我只是
No, I just, I just, um...
想家了
I'm just longing to be home.
你想要我回来吗
Do you want me to come back?
好 咱们一会儿见
Okay. Well, I'll see you later.
好 拜拜
Okay, bye-bye.
亲爱的朱莉
My dear Julie,
恶兽识己 苦于自处
The vile beast knows itself, and miserable he is with it.
汝伏此兽
It is you who has power over the beast.
乐之励之诫之谅之
To cheer, to encourage, to reprimand, to forgive.
此兽爱汝 汝仗此得权
He loves you so, and you are invested with great power.
善用此权 以仁待之
Use it wisely, and with mercy.
其重汝言
Your words means much to him,
汝会知晓
and that shall gradually become clear to you.
此前其未敞心扉
He has never laid open himself before,
敞开心扉为汝是为爱
and he could love you for that alone.
汝须自信 试以拨云见日
Trust in yourself and try and see clearly,
游云
and a small passing cloud
不因妄言而生
will not appear to another's lie.
我真的该做的都做了
There wasn't really anything that I didn't do.
最后陷入昏迷
Um, I ended up in a coma,
得了癫痫 嗑药过量
I had seizures, I had overdoses.
我是独生子女 我父母
I'm an only child, and my parents,
对他们来说 那就像是
what that was like for them...
但你知道吗 他们从没放弃过我
And yet they never gave up on me, you know.
实际上 我父亲还"勒索"过我
Um, in fact, my father blackmailed me.
有一次他对我说
He said to me one time, he said,
先打这个号♥码 我再给你美♥沙♥酮♥
"I'll give you this Physeptone if you just call this number."
那个号♥码是求助热♥线♥
And that was the helpline.
于是我就打了
And, of course, I made the call.
我参加互助会 重新开始约会
And I came to meetings, went out again, as I said...
直到最后 我受不了了
Until finally, I'd just had it,
我受够了
I'd just absolutely had it.
我的身体再也接受不了了
My body wouldn't take it anymore.
最后我进了局子
And I've ended up in police stations,
监狱 精神病院
in cells, in mental hospitals,
裹上约束服 大叫 发疯
straitjacketed, screaming, psychosis.
没什么好日子 你知道吗
None of it good, you know,
都是因为毒瘾
all for that feeling of the drug,
有时候 甚至在身体恢复的过程中
which sometimes, even in recovery,
你知道吗 瘾的感觉会上头
you know, I get feelings and things,
我想 天哪 想撞头
and I think, "Oh, Jesus, I just need a hit."
但不是今天 今天是例外
Uh... But not today. Just for today.
♪ 2000公里 ♪
♪ 2000 miles ♪
♪在下雪的时候很远 ♪
♪ Is very far through the snow ♪
♪ 我会想你的 ♪
♪ I'll think of you ♪
♪ 小猫 请你别去触碰那个女孩 ♪
♪ Now cat, don't touch that gal there, ​please ♪
♪ 你会醉倒的 ♪
♪ You'll get wasted, down to your knees ♪
♪ 我不喜欢吹大牛 ♪