冒牌人生（2005）

那个女巫是我的曾曾曾祖母.
That witch was my great, great,
曾祖母.
great, great grandmere.
爸爸，汤姆在这里.
Papa, Tom est l�.
安托万·普利松.
Antoine Plisson.
很高兴见到你.
Delighted to meet you.
很高兴见到你，先生.
Pleasure to meet you, sir.
请原谅我的英语.
Forgive my English.
有点生疏了，
I'm rather rusty,
但我希望你在这里的时候我会有所提高
but I expect you to remedy this while you're here.
- 哦，我不知道.
-Oh, I don't know.
你的英语非常完美，先生.
Your English impeccable, sir.
海洛伊丝向我稍微提起过你.
Heloise told me a little about you.
我非常想多了解一些.
I'm dying to hear more.
自从海洛伊丝的母亲去世后，
Ever since Heloise's mother died,
我们更喜欢待在贝尔欧姆布雷.
we prefer to stay here at Bell Ombre.
圣特罗佩不再是以前的样子了.
St. Tropez is not what it was.
太多浮华和物质. 太粗俗了.
Too much glitz and stuff. So vulgar.
还有所有的冒牌货，那些寻找财富的人...
And all the fakes, the fortune hunters...
嗯. 无♥耻♥，像糟糕的演员.
Hmm. Shameless, like bad actors.
是的，我确实有个问题，
Yes, I do have a problem,
或者更确切地说，你有问题.
or more precisely, you have problem.
这幅德瓦特的画不是德瓦特画的.
This Derwatt is not painted by Derwatt.
我们富得流油.
We are rich as sin.
为德瓦特干杯.
To Derwatt.
哦，当然，也为伯纳德干杯.
Oh, and of course, to Bernard, too.
为你，为我和伯纳德.
To you, and me and Bernard.
我们都已经走了很远.
We've all come so far.
嗯. 是时候休息一下了.
Mm. Time to take a break.
毕竟我们不想淹没市场.
We don't want to flood the market after all.
现在是时候按照约定
And it's time for Bernard to start workingon his own things
让伯纳德开始
for his own exhibition...
为自己的展览创作了...
as promised.
你让我如此欣喜若狂.
You've made me so deliriously happy.
我感觉更强大，更像，嗯，我自己.
I feel stronger, more, well, me.
哦，我太高兴了.
Oh, I'm so glad.
总是好在高♥潮♥时结束，亲爱的.
It's always good to end on a high note, sweetheart.
为我们美好的关系结束干杯.
To the end of our beautiful relationship.
你好.
Hello.
是的，我是.
Yes, this is he.
天哪.
Jesus H. Christ.
真漂亮. 真可爱，汤姆.
C'est jolie.It's lovely, Tom.
这是我母亲的.
It was my mother's.
我很小的时候就不得不离开家.
I had to leave home when I was really young.
她离开前把这个给了我.
She gave it to me before I left.
我这么让人反感吗？
Am I so repulsive?
什么？
What?
我这么让人反感，以至于你不愿意试着亲吻我吗？
Am I so repulsive that you wouldn't try to kiss me?
亲吻我.
Kiss me.
是时候说晚安了，汤姆.
Time to say good night, Tom.
谢谢你，汤姆.
Thank you, Tom.
不客气.
You're welcome.
嗨.
Hi.
你很快就会回来的，好吗？
Back before you know it, okay?
你到底在哪儿？
Where the hell are you?
你的问题是什么？
What's your problem?
我们的问题，汤姆. 我们的问题.
Our problem, Tom. Our problem.
一个艰巨的问题.
A Herculean problem.
我们的美国朋友回来了，
Our American friend is back,
声称他的新德瓦特画是假的.
claiming his new Derwatt is a fake.
好吧，冷静下来. 哪个美国人？
All right, calm down. What American?
默奇森.
Murchison.
就是给我未来德瓦特作品支票的那个.
The one who gave me the check for the future Derwatts.
嗯，我说服他等我跟他谈谈.
Well, I convinced him to wait until I talked to him.
但我们该怎么办，汤姆？
But what are we going to do, Tom?
我不知道，汤姆.
I don't know, Tom.
伪造一幅画是一回事，但这...
Faking a picture's one thing, but this...
全都是伪造，杰夫.
It's all forgery, Jeff.
我不懂这有什么区别.
I don't get the distinction.
呃，你要去哪儿？
Uh, where are you going?
我需要躺下.
I need to lie down.
他很紧张.
He's on edge.
是的，嗯...
Yes, well...
如果你不停地画德瓦特的噩梦，
If you painted Derwatt's nightmares nonstop,
你也会半疯狂的.
you'd be half mad as well.
而你没有让事情变得更好，不是吗？
And you didn't exactly help things did you?
等一下.
Wait a second.
我以为辛西娅和伯纳德没事.
I thought Cynthia and Bernard were fine.
她在最后一幅画还没干之前就抛弃了他.
She cut him off before the last painting was dry.
- 够了. - 哦，看在上帝的份上，辛.
-Enough is enough. -Oh, for fuck sakes, Cyn.
你坐在一座金山上.
You are sitting on a fortune.
真的.
Literally.
一旦这些画被卖♥♥掉，
Once these paintings have been sold,
收藏家们会求着要更多.
the collectors will be begging for more.
你睡伯纳德.
You fuck Bernard.
伯纳德画德瓦特.
Bernard paints Derwatts.
我们都会死得很富有.
We all die very, very rich.
伯纳德现在可以从零开始画德瓦特了.
And Bernard can paint Derwatts from scratch now.
我们可以永远继续这样下去.
We could keep this going on forever.
你不是我的皮条客.
You're not my pimp.
不，但这并不妨碍你成为一个妓♥女♥！
No, but that does not stop you from being a whore!
- 闭嘴. - 混♥蛋♥.
-Shut up. -Bastard.
闭嘴一会儿，听我说.
Just shut up for a second and listen to me.
好吧. 这里有一封德瓦特的信
All right. Here's a letter from Derwatt
证明这幅画的真实性. 你把那个给默奇森，
authenticating the painting. You give that to Murchison,
他会高高兴兴地登上下一班飞机回家.
he'll be on the next plane for home happy as a clam.
我要回去看海洛伊丝.
I'm going back to see Heloise.
这是她的号♥码.
Here's her number.
你有任何问题，给我打电♥话♥，好吗？
You have any problems, you call me, all right?
好的.
Okay.
大家都满意吗？
Is everyone satisfied?
会有效吗？
Will it work?
会.
Yes.
如果杰夫能让可♥卡♥因♥远离他的翻领.
If Jeff can keep the coke off his lapel.
管理危机非常棘手.
It's very trying managing a crisis.
这就是你叫我妓♥女♥的代价.
That's for calling me a whore.
现在是谁不重要.
It's not important who this is.
嗯，不要再买♥♥任何德瓦特了.
Um, just don't buy any more Derwatts.
要求见德瓦特.
Ask to see Derwatt.
忘了我怎么知道的.
Forget about how I know.
不！
No!
要求见德瓦特.
Ask to see Derwatt.
你知道话是怎么传开的，不管怎样. 就这么做好了.
You know word gets around, whatever. Just do it.
嘿，伯纳德.
Hey, Bernard.
你洒了一点松节油吗？
Did you spill a little turpentine?
你在干什么，伙计？
What are you doing, man?
哦，上帝.
Oh, God.
这松节油是怎么回事？
What's with the turpentine?
走开. 走开！
Get away. Get away!
- 哦，他是不是 - 给我打火机.
-Oh, is he-- -Give me the lighter.
- 不，走开. - 我的上帝.
-No, get away. -Good God.
- 离我远点. - 他要自杀.
-Get away from me. -He's going to kill himself.
- 冷静下来. - 给我.
-Calm down. -Give it to me.
- 他要自杀. - 不，请你. 离我远点.
-He's going to kill himself. -No please. Stay away from me.
- 没关系. - 阻止他！
-It's all right. -Stop him!
我求你了，不然我就点火！反正我也死定了.
I'm begging you, or I'll light! I'm dead anyway.
别管我. 你这个骗子 - 走开，走开！
And leave me alone. You lying-- go away, go away!
- 停下来！ - 走开！
-Stop it! -Go away!
给我 - 给我这个.
Give me-- give it here.
没事了，没事了.
It's okay, it's okay.
“如果他不满意，
"And if he is dissatisfied,