像素大战

Okay, boys! Do exactly what we talked about!
从头部开始射击蜈蚣
Shoot each centipede from the head down!
别射中间 不然会分成两只
Do not hit him in the middle or he will split into two!
不是说别让它们分成两只吗
No! No! Didn't we just say don't split him in half?
射头
Shoot for the head!
那些蘑菇挡到了
The mushroom things are in the way!
那就射蘑菇 跟打电动一样
You shoot the mushroom things! Like the game!
它们每次碰到蘑菇 就会改变方向
Guys, every time he hits a mushroom, he's gonna change direction!
天啊 拜托找出移♥动♥模式 预测它们的动向
My God! Will you please find the pattern and anticipate!
我不知道什么鬼移♥动♥模式
I don't know the patterns!
达中士 12点钟方向
Sergeant Duff! 12 o'clock!
这是什么鬼啤酒广♥告♥
What the hell kind of beer commercial is this?
我说它是啤酒广♥告♥ 它就是啤酒广♥告♥
If I say it's a beer commercial, it's a bloody beer commercial.
给我滚回来 美♥国♥佬♥
Get your flabby ass back here, Yank!
给它们下马威 水啦
Shock and awe, baby!
我们得高分 外星废物
High score, alien trash!
你们惹错星球了
You messed with the wrong planet!
大英帝国尚盖勇
From Land's End to John o'Groats!
-你在说什么鬼 -我不知道
-What the hell are you saying? -I don't know!
拉德洛 拿个轻航♥空♥炮 快过来 需要你帮忙
Hey, Ludlow! Grab a light cannon! Get out here now! I need your help!
我 不 我看起来这么可口
Me? No! Look at me! I look delicious!
他们会把我当太空小笼包吃下去
They'll gobble me up like space dim sum!
到第二关了
It's level two!
只有我们能打到这关
We're the only ones who can do this!
快点 你是神奇小子
Come on! You're the Wonder Kid!
你无权在此使用武器 布伦纳先生
You have no authority to dispense weapons here, Mr. Brenner!
总统先生
Mr. President?
让那两个老宅男主导
Let the nerds take over.
您说什么 总统
What was that, sir?
让那两个老宅男主导
Let the nerds take over!
让那两个老宅男主导
Let the nerds take over!
布伦纳说得对
Brenner's right.
我是神奇小子
I am the Wonder Kid.
这种场面帅呆了
This is the best, huh?
我从来没这么爽过
I've never been happier and more alive!
好 你们不必熊抱了
Okay. You can let go of each other now.
你解决那个 我解决这个
All right, you finish that. I'll finish this.
我30年前痛宰过你 现在让你回味一下
It's been 30 years since I kicked your butt, and it's gonna happen again!
挥动手臂
With the arms!
往前
Let's take it forward.
收回来
Then take it back.
-好好享受 -嘿
-Enjoy it! -Hey!
过来
Come here!
你这个小...
You little...
你是谁 先生
Who are you, mister?
小朋友 我只是个爱打电动的鲁蛇
Son, I'm just a loser who's good at old video games.
感谢老天
Well, thank God for that.
今天美国政♥府♥请客
Drinks are on the US government!
政♥府♥隐瞒了胡佛水坝下
Which is covering up the truth
有古金字塔的秘密
about the ancient pyramid under the Hoover Dam!
你还不赖 布伦纳
You know, you're all right, Brenner.
你也是 势利鬼
You're all right too, snobby.
你要整晚端着 还是要喝掉
You gonna nurse that all night long, or when are you gonna start hittin' it?
如果只是伤到几个外敌 可以喝啤酒庆祝
We ding up a few foreign belligerents, beer is fine.
但我们击退了整批外星人♥大♥军
We defeat a full-on alien invasion,
我想喝烈一点的
I'm thinking something a little stronger.
不 你在跟我呛声 跟你拼了
No. You're really challenging me to drink you under the table? You got it.
你不见得拼得过我
I'm not so sure you can, buddy.
我在西点军校是班上的伏特加女王
I was the vodka shot record holder in my class at West Point.
有一次我在速食店喝了15杯奶昔
Well, one time I drank 15 milkshakes at Denny's,
看谁比较猛
so we'll see what happens.
我的电玩高手呢
Where are my gamers at?
小时候你浪费的时间终于得到回报
Looks like all the time you wasted when we were kids is finally payin' off.
-就是啊 -帅啦
-Yeah, baby. -All right, huh?
总统 我为您倒了杯冰啤酒
Sir, may I have the honor of pouring you a frosty?
危机期间不能被人看到总统喝酒
The President can't be seen drinking during times of crisis.
所以谁都不准看
So nobody look!
对 眼光移开
That's it. Look away!
地球居民
Inhabitants of Earth.
恭喜你们打赢这场仗
Congratulations, you have won this battle.
请接受我们奉上一名战士 作为你们的战利品
Please accept one of our warriors as a trophy of your victory.
下一次挑战可没这么容易
The next challenge will not be as easy.
细节随后透过此讯号♥送出
The details will be sent via this signal shortly
记住 我们还是以二比一领先
Remember, we are still leading two battles to one.
再输一次 你们的世界就将毁灭
One more loss for you will mean the annihilation of your world.
祝你们好运 愿最优星球获胜
Good luck and may the best planet win.
你们听到了
Well, you heard 'em.
大家重返岗位
Let's get back to work.
你们得准备迎接下场战役
We gotta get you guys ready for your next battle.
战役 我们
Battle? Us? Huh?
我们成了固定咖吗
This is like a regular thing now?
记得我说你人生不该只有这样吗
Remember when I told you that you were meant for something more in life?
记得
Yeah.
这是你的大好机会
This could be it, buddy.
没有人比你更厉害
There's nobody better than you.
这个嘛
Well,
不是百战百胜
not at every game.
不 想都别想
No. No! Never gonna happen.
他说得对 布伦纳
You know, he's right, Brenner.
我们又不知道去哪找那个白♥痴♥
We don't even know where to find that idiot!
埃迪 四度结婚离婚
Eddie Plant. Married and divorced four times,
1991与2004年宣告破产
declared bankruptcy in 1991 and 2004.
2005年 他因骇入手♥机♥公♥司♥被捕
In 2005, he was caught hacking cell phone companies
让用户每个月的帐单上
and adding one of those fees you see on your bill every month,
增加一些莫名的费用
but have no idea what it is.
他在遭判刑20年之前
Made about 50 million before he was convicted and sentenced
海削五千万
to 20 years in prison.
警卫 带我出去
Guards, get me outta here.
是那个恶毒的大蜈蚣杀手
It's that mean Centipede killer.
希望他别用雷射枪杀了我
I hope he don't zap me with his space gun.
你好吗 埃迪
How are you, Eddie?
怎样 亚军哥
'Sup, Second Place?
你的小跟班也来了
And your sidekick here,
小胖总统
Presi-donut.
没想到你的支持率这么惨不忍♥嘟
I didn't know you can have an approval rating so catatastrophic.
-埃迪 我们需要你帮忙 -我知道你们需要什么
-Okay, look, Eddie, here's what we need. -I know what you need.
你们需要旋风之火
You need the Fire Blaster.
谁是旋风之火
Who's the Fire Blaster?
正是在下 那是我的绰号♥ 翘臀妹
Me. That's my nickname, sugar buns.
没错 你自己瞎掰的
Yeah. That's right. The one you made up for yourself.
管他是谁瞎掰的
Who cares who made it up?
这称号♥帅呆了
It's totally tubular!
对啦
Yeah.
这就是我不能跟布伦纳同队的原因
See, this is why I don't think I can have Brenner on my team.
他算不上电玩高手
He's just not really a gamer.
拿铜板来 自己挑个游戏 我把你打得落花流水
Break out a bag of quarters. Pick a game. I'll destroy you at it.
那我就挑个游戏
I'll pick a game, all right.
-我要闪人了 -不...别这样
-Okay. I'm leaving. -No, no, no. Hey, here, come on.
坐下
Sit down.
为了答谢你帮我们
Okay, in exchange for helping us,
我会亲自找假释委员会 缩短你的刑期
I will personally speak to the parole board about reducing your sentence.
-免谈 -免谈
-Pass. -Pass?
埃迪不接受这条件
That deal don't work for Eddie Plant.
你要旋风之火帮忙 他有些要求
You want the Fire Blaster's help, he has some demands.
要求
Demands?
变成老花眼之火了
The Bifocal Blaster is here, by the way.
我要一座岛
I want an island.
欧买♥♥尬
Oh, my God.
全美有18617座
There are 18,617 named islands
已命名的岛屿
that are part of the United States and its territories.
更别说还有无数的无名岛