永不回头

我这辈子从来没有因为洗衣服这么兴奋
I've never been so excited to do laundry in my life.
结束了吗
Are they done yet?
不 还没
Nope, not yet.
-姐妹 我好饿 -我也是
- Dude, I am so hungry. - Me, too.
-有什么吃的吗 -都像是老头们吃的
- Anything good? - Just, like, old people shit.
这是什么 巧克力饼干 无糖的
What is this? Chocolate biscuit, sugar free.
味道不错
That's so good.
你们在这干嘛呢
What y'all do in'?
你们找到了我的秘密基地
Oh, shit. Y'all done found my secret stash.
嗯 我们太饿了 你不介意吧
Yeah, we were starving. Is that okay?
没事 但是我每次吃一块就够了
Yeah, that's cool, but I would only just eat one.
什么
What?
大♥麻♥做的黄油会让你们磕嗨的
Yeah, man, that weed butter will fuck you up.
太恶心了
This sucks.
我吐不出来 我做不到啊
Nothing's coming up. I can't do it.
我也是
No, me neither.
妈的 恶心死我了
Fuck, this sucks. This sucks.
-该死的 保罗 -逮到你们了
- Damn it, Paul! - I got you bitches!
给你
Here.
天呢 它们被泡在啤酒里了
God, these are soaked in beer.
保罗就是个混♥蛋♥
Paul is such a dick.
你有什么感觉吗
Hey, you feel anything yet?
没 你呢
No, you?
没有
Nothing.
姐妹 那是克丽丝特
Dude, Crystal.
她就是个婊♥子♥
She's such a bitch.
我敢打赌她就是一个内心非常不快乐的人
I bet you she's just like...a really unhappy person on the inside.
你去想一下 实际上还有点难过
Which... if you think about, it's... actually kinda sad.
是这样
Yeah, it is.
幸好我们的内心是快乐的
Thank God we're not sad on the inside.
是的
No.
我的心态非常好
I'm wonderful on the inside.
我也是
Me, too.
你俩认真的吗 就这样子还想回来工作
Is this seriously how you're coming to ask for your jobs back?
天呢 你这湿了吗 那是啤酒吗
Oh, my God, are they wet? Is that beer?
你♥他♥妈♥的到底在忙什么呢
What the fuck are you doing in your lives
能让你忙到没时间烘干制♥服♥
that you're too busy to dry your uniforms?
首先排除工作
Not working, that's for sure.
在听吗
Hello?
在吗
Anybody home?
天呢
Oh, my God.
你们磕嗨了
You're high as fuck.
该死的 猜对了的感觉真好
Goddamn, it feels good to be right.
你们在这里别动 我去找罗德里克
Okay. You two stay right here, and I'ma go get Roderick.
妈的 被她知道了
Oh, shit, she knows.
她是怎么知道的
Dude, how did she know?
不知道 有点奇怪你知道吗
I don't know. You know what's weird about that?
我始终觉得我磕嗨的时候别人能看出来
I always think that people know I'm high when I'm high.
但是通常 他们看不出来
But usually, they actually don't.
但是这次 她确实发现了
But this time, she actually did.
太疯狂了
That's crazy.
那有薄煎饼
Oh, pancakes.
罗德里克说他在办公室等你们
Roderick said he'll meet you in his office.
放心 我没告诉他你们"嗨"成这样
And don't worry, I didn't tell him you were stoned.
我想给他一个惊喜来着
I thought it'd be a fun surprise.
拜
Bye.
你俩没事儿吧
Y'all feel in' okay?
瞧那海滩
That beach.
我真是太想去那儿了
I just wanna be there so bad.
在这个压抑的鬼地方
What is the deal with screensavers like that
那个屏保也太格格不入了吧
in a depressing place like this?
它让我越来越不想在儿这呆了
It just makes me wanna be here so much less.
他们应该换一个
What they should have...
悲惨一点的图片
is pictures of really sad places.
没错 比如
Yeah. Like...
拿着电钻朝你走过来的牙医
pictures of the dentist, coming at you with a drill.
不错
Yes.
-或者沃尔玛超♥市♥ -也不错
- Or Walmart. - Yeah.
不对
No.
凯玛特指那些生意萧条 濒临倒闭的商场
因该叫凯玛特
K-Mart.
没错
Yes.
我想知道罗德里克会说啥
I wonder what Roderick's gonna say.
我也是
Me, too.
我想知道他会不会相信我们的理由
I wonder if he believed our excuse.
不会
No.
我不会相信你们俩被绑♥架♥了
I did not believe you two were kidnapped.
还有接下来你们要编的所有鬼话
Or for that matter, any of the stories you come up with.
真是的 你们知道我有多失望吗
Man, you know I'm disappointed?
你们本来是标兵员工
You two were on such a good streak.
按时上班 努力干活
Showing up to work on time, working hard,
下班后再嗑药
doing drugs after you leave.
希望你们知道
Just so you know...
今天我本来是真的打算让你们回来上班的
I really was gonna give you your jobs back today.
-等会儿 真的吗 -真的
- Wait, really? - Yes.
所以 我们保住饭碗了呗
So, we're hired back?
不 不 你们被解雇了
No! No, you're fired.
你俩进来时狼狈得就像
Comin' here looking like
海斯佩罗号♥残骸一样
the goddamn Wreck of the Hesperus,
还嗨得像风筝一样要上天了
and as high as a kite.
就算我想让你们回来工作
And even if I wanted to hire you back,
你们这个样子怎么干活
you couldn't work like this.
万一公♥司♥派人来查岗看到你们俩这样
If somebody from corporate came in here and saw you,
连我都要被炒鱿鱼
hell, I'd get fired.
什么鬼东西的残骸
The wreck of the what?
不晓得
I don't know.
不过我觉得他也知道咱们嗑药了
But I think he knows we're high, too.
我能听到你们说话
I can hear you.
我就在你们两尺开外
I'm literally two feet away.
知道吗 你们在这儿还是有所作为的
You know, you two are really something.
我会想念你们在这的时光的
And I'm gonna miss having you around here.
你们聪明 滑稽 简直一对儿活宝
You're bright, funny, entertaining as hell,
是这鬼地方我唯一不讨厌的东西了
and one of the only things about this place I don't hate.
即使我的工作很烂 它确实很烂
As shitty as my job is, and it is shitty...
但我也没有什么资本放弃它
I don't have the luxury to lose it.
所以 就当我帮在你们一个忙吧
So, take this as a favor from me to you.
你们不会想落到和我一样的下场的
You don't wanna end up like me.
趁着大好年华去做些有意义的事吧
Go do something with your lives.
从洗个澡开始
And start by taking a shower.
女士们
Ladies.
女士们
Ladies!
你们不能在这里睡觉
Y'all can't be sleep in' on here.
请你们赶紧下车
You need to get up off my bus.
这是哪儿
Where are we?
这儿是中转站 请快下车吧
The transit station. Now, come on.
你们都霸占这个位置快4个小时了
You been on here nearly four hours, takin' up this seat.
-好好 马上 -赶紧的
- Okay. Yeah, okay. - Let's go.
天啊
Jesus.
这是我的脸吗
Is this my face?
早些时候我也这样吗
Did I look like this earlier?
不晓得
I don't know.
我都快忘记我们已经被炒了
I barely remember us getting fired.
等会
Wait.
那是真实的 是吧
That was real, right?
是吧 我觉得是
Yeah. I think so.
除非我们在经历那种类似
Ooh, unless we're having, like,
什么双重幻觉之类的
some kind of a dual hallucination,
要是那样可真实吊炸天了
which would be really cool.
如果我们真的在双重幻觉
Dude, if we ever dual hallucinate,
我倒希望是那种
I hope it includes, like,
能见到独角兽之类的 而不是咱被炒鱿鱼