美丽的伪证（1989）

人心善变
People change.
这不是我15年前
This isn't the woman I married
娶的女人
15 years ago.
去他妈的废话
You're damn right.
那个女人住在中♥央♥公园西街
That woman lives on central park west.
你是12年前娶了我
You married me 12 years ago.
管它呢
Whatever.
劳拉
Laura.
这支箭直接穿过门
And this arrow comes right through the door
直直戳我屁♥股♥
and skewers me in the ass.
一切都变得异常可笑了
It's all comical now.
我确信她是故意的
I was convinced she did it on purpose.
故意的吗?
On purpose?
这是最精彩的部分
Here's the best part.
我以为她想炸掉我的房♥子
I thought she tried to blow up my house.
他以为她想炸掉房♥子
He thought she tried to blow up the house.
我是白♥痴♥吗?
Am I an idiot?
你就是一个白♥痴♥ 你就是一个白♥痴♥
You're an idiot. You're an idiot.
我怎么能怀疑她呢?
How could I suspect her?
谁还想要炖菜?
Who wants more casserole?
哦!
Oh!
我要
I do.
谢谢！
Thank you.
再来点
More. More.
我来拿
I'll get it.
亲爱的,你不应该
Honey, you shouldn't.
烫不死人
It won't kill me.
格雷格 加里有没有告诉你
Greg, did Gary tell you
妮娜昨天做了什么?
what Nina did yesterday?
怎么了 猫咪 炖菜太多了?
What's the matter, beeswax, too much casserole?
猫咪？
Beeswax?
猫咪？
Beeswax?
猫咪,别闹
Beeswax, come on.
我觉得他们是很可爱的一对
I think they're an adorable couple.
她一身天使般外表
She has a surface beauty,
但这也不是能保持长♥期♥关系的基础
but that's no basis for a longterm relationship.
那是什么?
What is?
爱
Love.
对
Right.
她要毒死我们!
She poisoned US!
别闹,真的
No, really.
我是认真的!
I'm serious!
炖菜
The casserole.
那只猫
The cat.
那只猫!
The cat!
天啊 这是真的!
Oh, my god, it's true!
你怎么会爱上一个杀人犯?
How could you fall in love with a murderer?
遇到好女孩真不容易
It's not easy to meet girls.
我的小猫咪
My beautiful beeswax.
一定有解药的
There's got to be an antidote.
发现的好,菲尔
Nice going, Phil.
别担心
Don't worry.
把芝士蛋糕给我!
Give me that cheesecake!
你不节食了？
What about your diet?
去他妈的节食
Screw my diet.
圣斯坦尼斯 我就知道是她编的
St. stanislaw. I knew she made it up.
来 试试液体引流的解毒剂
Here, try the antidote for liquid drain opener.
不要 你试吧
No. You try it.
咱们来分♥析♥一下这个
Let's get this stuff analyzed.
我宁愿死掉
I'd rather die.
我们最好吐出来
We better throw up.
吐吧 快点!
Throw up, come on!
我们去阳台吧
Let's go to the balcony.
快点!
Hurry!
这还不行
That's not good enough.
去医院洗胃吧
They'll pump our stomachs in the hospital.
你知道去医院的路吗?
Do you know the way there?
相信我 我知道
Believe me, I know it.
萨姆 我们还没跟孩子们说再见
Sam, we never said goodbye to the children.
小心点 别洒了
Careful, don't spill it.
冷静点 大家都会没事的
Calm down, everyone's going to be fine.
亲爱的 我是妈妈
Sweethearts, it's your mother.
我不想让你难过
I don't want to upset you,
但你可能再也见不到我们了
but you may never see US again.
我有件事要坦白
I have a confession.
多年来我一直在谎报年龄
I've been lying about my age for years.
我们都知道的
We know.
她为什么不直接杀了你?
Why didn't she just murder you?
赶快说些后事
Say something she'll remember.
谢谢你,加里
Thanks, Gary.
我从来不是个称职的父亲 达芙妮
I've never been much of a father, Daphne,
我知道,
I know,
但有一点建议
but there's one bit of advice
真金无价的建议
that I regard as invaluable.
老爸痛快点 我男朋友在另一条线上
Dad, my boyfriend's on the other line.
我应该在这里找个自己的停车位
I should get my own parking space here.
快点
Come on, hurry.
我要起诉你 布莱克伍德
I'm suing you, blackwood.
我一直知道她很危险
I always knew she was trouble.
放松 洗胃不会痛的
Relax, stomach pumping doesn't hurt.
菲利普?
Philip?
康斯薇拉 大家都去哪了?
Um, consuela, where is everybody?
他走向她 把她抱在怀里
He walked to her and took her in his arms,
她的双峰紧紧地贴着他
her breasts pressed firmly against him.
那是我一生中最糟糕的经历
That was the worst experience of my life.
我从来没让那么大的东西
I've never had anything that big
卡住我的喉咙里
stuck down my throat before.
我听说的可不是这样
That's not what I've heard.
彼得·斯威夫特那磐石般的心
The tough heart of Peter swift
一看见她就变成了熔化成炽热熔岩
turned to molten lava when he saw her.
她长着一张天使般的脸 纤弱无比
She had an angel's face. Fragile.
她的气息是那么诱人 欲罢不能
Her breath was tantalizing. Arousing,
但当她给他理发时
but as she cut his hair,
斯威夫特感到冷剪刀拂过他的脖子
swift felt the cold scissors brush his neck.
斯威夫特一直独自生活
Swift had lived alone
自从他妻子被烧死后
since his wife was incinerated
当年由微波炉造成的事故
when the microwave went berserk.
现在有一个陌生人和他住在一起
Now a stranger lived with him.
一个充满异域风情肉♥欲♥的美人
An exotic, sensual creature.
如果那个警♥察♥是对的呢?
What if the cop was right?
如果她真是杀人犯呢?
What if she was a murderer?
是否有人知道
Do any of US know
我们爱上的那个人?
the person we fall in love with?
这个女人是情人还是凶手?
Was this woman his lover or murderer?
你再也不能工作了 布莱克伍德
You'll never work again, blackwood.
加里 我想跟你解释一下
Gary, I want to explain something.
现在不行,亨利 我们今晚太糟糕了
Not now, Henry. We had a rough night.
你知道你的猫
You know how your cat
为什么总是过来?
is always coming over?
唐娜在我们的地下室发现的它 已经死了
Well, Donna found it in our basement, dead.
肯定是在保险丝盒周围
It must have been around the fuse box
触电而死
and gotten electrocuted.
唐娜之前想告诉你的
Donna wanted to tell you before,
但她不想抱着一只死猫
but she didn't want to walk into your party
参加你的派对
carrying a dead cat,
所以她把它放在了你的后门
so she put it inside your back door.
好吧,我很抱歉
Look, I'm sorry.
我们再给你买♥♥一只猫行吧
We'll get you another cat.
尼娜
Nina.
你认为我是杀人犯
You think I'm a murderer.