即兴卧底（2025）

但你有很多啊。
But you've got loads.
我知道，但我家人口多。
I know but I've got a big family.
休，我们拿到钥匙了。走吧。 放手吧。
Hugh, we've got the keys.Let's go. - Let it go.
抱歉。 - 走吧。
Sorry. - Let's go.
哦，我的优步到了。
Oh, it's my Uber.
哦。 - 去戒毒所。
Oh. - To rehab.
我一看到你们的脸就叫了车。
I called it the second I saw your faces.
完成这个，甜心。
Finish this, sweetie.
我会的，爸。
I will, Dad.
走！走，走，走，走！ - 走！走！走！
Let's go! Go, go, go, go! - Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
上车！上车！上车！
Get in! Get in! Get in!
休？
嗯，我上了！我上了！
- Hugh?
- Yeah, I'm in! I'm in!
开车！
Drive!
抱歉，兄弟。
I'm sorry, man.
你去哪儿了？
Where have you been?
开始干活吧。
Let's get to work.
呃，在我们埋了这具尸体后，
Ugh, after we bury this body,
我们得想办法把车还回去，
we need to work out how to get the car back,
擦掉指纹，
wipe off fingerprints,
移除任何追踪设备，
remove any tracking devices,
还得想办法把钥匙放回屋里而不被……
and somehow get the keys back inside the house without ever...
或者那样也行。
Or that. That works.
我送你回家。
I'll drive you home.
警♥察♥的手♥机♥在托特纳姆黑尔的店里破解了。
Cop's phone's at an electrics shop in Tottenham Hale, getting hacked.
所以，嗯……
So, um...
破解个手♥机♥要多久？
how long does that take to hack a phone?
不长。
Not long.
我们很快就会知道谁出♥卖♥♥♥了我们。
We'll know who grassed on us soon enough.
所以，我把你们放哪儿？
So, where am I dropping you guys?
呃……
Uh...
这儿就行。
up here's fine.
留下来。
Stay.
我想给你看看我的地方。
I wanna show you my place.
太棒了。
Brilliant.
他没事。他能搞定。
He's fine. He can handle it.
你确定？
You sure?
来吧。我们需要那部手♥机♥。
Come on. We need that phone.
我们是来拿警♥察♥的手♥机♥的。
We're here for the pig's phone.
这些混♥蛋♥得赶紧交出来。
These fucks need to hand it over.
梅特卡夫的命令。
我第一次听说。
- Metcalfe's orders.
- First I've heard.
要不要我给梅特卡夫打个电♥话♥，让你跟他解释现在是你说了算？
How about I call up Metcalfe so you can explain to him that you're in charge now?
好吧。
我可以帮你点单吗？
- Fine.
- Can I take your order?
楼上。
Upstairs.
呃。
Ugh.
这真是操蛋的一天。
That was a fucking day.
是啊。
Yeah.
那么，你一个人住在这儿吗？
So, do you live here alone then?
我去给我们倒杯酒。
I'm gonna pour us a glass.
黑皮诺？
Pinot noir?
哦，对，那太好了。
Oh, yeah, that would be lovely.
嗯，你介意我去洗漱一下吗？
Um, yeah, do you mind if I go and freshen up?
当然不介意。
好的。
- Sure.
- Okay.
枪。
Gun.
只是一把枪。
Just a gun.
哦，谢谢。
Oh, thank you.
那么……
So...
你喜欢什么？
what do you like?
哦，嗯，显然是近景魔术。
Oh, well, um, close-up magic obviously.
嗯，任何熏鱼，呃，数学游戏。
Um, any type of smoked fish, uh, games with maths.
省去很多麻烦。
Save yourselves a lot of bother.
上次有条虫敢对我说不，还是在阿富汗。
Last time a worm said no to me was Afghanistan.
你在阿富汗打过仗？
You fought in Afghanistan?
你以为我这伤怎么来的？
How do you think I got this?
你最近什么时候在那儿？
How recently were you there?
有些伤永远不会愈合。
Some wounds never heal.
那伤应该好了。
That should have.
尤其当这种伤害是被关塔那摩最变♥态♥刑讯者弄伤的时候。
Not when it was inflicted by the sickest torturer in Guantanamo.
关塔...
Guant--
所以，你是跟塔♥利♥班♥一起作战？
So, you were fighting with the Taliban?
开始明白了？
Beginning to work it out?
我可是你见过的最变♥态♥的混♥蛋♥。
I'm the sickest motherfucker you ever met.
开始了。
Here we go.
我们不要豆子。我们要披萨骑士。
We don't want beans. We want the Pizza Knight.
耶！他来了。
Yay! He's here.
根据皇家法令，你们召唤了披萨骑士。
By royal decree, you have summoned the Pizza Knight.
周一夜间足球由披萨骑士赞助。
Monday Night Football is sponsored by the Pizza Knight.
从冷冻到美味只需三分钟。
From frozen to delicious in only three minutes.
以女王的名义……
In the name of the Queen...
我们开宴。
we feast.
那家伙，他看起来跟你长得一模一样。
That guy, he looks just like you.
那家伙看起来像个傻瓜。
That guy looks like a knob.
你是说我看起来像个傻瓜？
Are you saying I look like a knob?
我只是说了我说的。
I'm saying what I'm saying.
那我们就有问题了。
Then, we have a problem.
太棒了。
Magnificent.
你想干一架，大个子？
You wanna go, big man?
嘿！
Oi!
你在这上面干嘛？
What you doing up here?
哦，我是...我，呃，我为梅特卡夫工作。
Oh, I'm a--I, uh, I work for Metcalfe.
你说什么？
没事。我为梅特卡夫工作...哇！
- You what?
- It's fine. I work for Metcalfe--whoa!
出去！快滚，贱♥人♥！
对不起。
- Out! Move, bitch, now!
- Excuse me.
你不用碰我或干什么。
You don't need to touch me or anything.
啊！
Ah!
该死的混♥蛋♥。
Fucking dick.
♪ 爱上任何人都不稀奇 ♪
♪ It's not unusual to be loved by anyone ♪
♪ 和任何人玩乐都不稀奇 ♪
♪ It's not unusual to have fun with anyone ♪
♪ 但当我看到你跟别人混在一起 ♪
♪ But when I see you hanging about with anyone ♪
♪ 看到我哭泣并不稀奇 ♪
♪ It's not unusual to see me cry ♪
♪ 我想死去 ♪
♪ I wanna die ♪
♪ 随时出去玩都不稀奇 ♪
♪ It's not unusual to go out at any time ♪
♪ 但看到你四处晃荡真是罪过 ♪
♪ But when I see you out and about it's such a crime ♪
♪ 如果你想被任何人爱 ♪
♪ If you should ever wanna be loved by anyone ♪
♪ 这不稀奇 ♪
所以，那才是跑过来的人。
- ♪ It's not unusual ♪
- So, that's who came running.
你好，叛徒。
Hello, rat.
♪ 你会发现这总是发生 ♪
♪ You'll find it happens all the time ♪
♪ 爱永远不会如你所愿 ♪
♪ Love will never do what you want it to ♪
♪ 为什么这疯狂的爱不能属于我？ ♪
♪ Why can't this crazy love be mine? ♪
嗯？
Yup?
直接撞进来了。
Walked right into it.
这就是我爱警♥察♥的原因。
That's what I love about coppers.
蠢得跟屎一样。
Thick as shite.
哦，你真是滔滔不绝啊，弗莱。
Oh, you're on a roll you are, Fly.
我怎么能预料到这个？
How could I see this coming?
老警♥察♥一定改了规矩，
The Old Bill must have changed their rules
因为这帮人四处杀人。
'cause this lot have been going around fucking killing people.
你为他们担♥保♥。他们是你的责任。
You vouched for them. They are your responsibility.
明天晚上过来给我和阿尔巴尼亚人泡杯茶怎么样？
Why don't you come over tomorrow night and make a cup of tea for me and the Albanians?
什么？交易又恢复了？
What? The deal's back on?
我屈服于他们的要求了。
I bent to their demands.
与此同时……
And in the meantime...
与此同时……
And in the meantime...
杂菜汤。
Ratatouille.
在我老爸去世之前，
Before my old man died,